But Josh was a friend, and it was just a friendly kiss between friends, she thought, not wanting to give it any more credence than that. Certainly nothing for her to worry about. She wasn’t about to lose her heart or her head. Not at this late stage, and certainly not with Josh. She’d learned her lesson once. And she wasn’t about to read anything more into a friendly kiss between pals, certain he had probably forgotten about it by now.
Grabbing her purse, her uniform and the flowers she’d swiped from Mrs. Richards’s garden, Em let herself out of the car and hurried up the porch steps.
Josh opened the door before she even got to it.
“Hi,” he said, reaching for her uniform and her purse bundled in her hands.
“Hi yourself,” she said with a smile, realizing how glad she was to see him. It was nice coming home and having somewhere here, she thought. Very nice.
“Nice roses,” he said with a lift of his brow. “Got a secret admirer I don’t know about?” He ignored the streak of jealously that tore through him at the mere thought.
“Nope,” she said with a grin, glancing up at him. “I stole them,” she admitted shamelessly.
“Stole them?” With a lift of his brow, Josh merely stared at her, then his glance lowered to the roses. “Mrs. Richards’s garden?”
“Yep,” she admitted with a laugh.
“Em, you know if she catches you, she’s going to call—”
“Josh, they’re for you,” she said, a bit embarrassed as she thrust the roses at him.
“For me?” Touched beyond measure, and totally confused since he’d never gotten flowers from a woman before, Josh’s brow went up again, making her grin. “And exactly what on earth did I do to deserve roses?”
“Nothing,” she said with a grin. Unable to resist, she stepped closer to lay a hand on his chest. “And everything,” she added softly, only confusing him more. She had to swallow the lump in her throat in order to continue. She knew Josh was just being Josh, trying to look out for her and protect her, and she felt horrendously guilty about the way she’d treated him. She shouldn’t have jumped all over him about Jake and Ernie; she should have just understood that it was going to take some time for Josh to get used to the fact that she was an adult now, fully capable of taking care of herself. Still, that didn’t mean she had to be rude to him. “Josh, look I know I’ve been a bit…”
“Cranky?” he supplied helpfully, making her grin widen.
“Yeah, cranky and I’ve probably also been a bit…”
“Testy,” he helpfully supplied again, his grin firmly in place.
“Yeah, that, too,” she admitted with a grin of her own, dragging her hair out of her eyes.
Josh shrugged. “You’re pregnant, Em, it’s to be expected. I understand that pregnancy can play havoc with your emotions.” He shrugged again. “I haven’t taken anything personally.”
“Good,” she said in relief, realizing she couldn’t let it go at that. For her own peace of mind, she had to apologize, had to let him know how much she appreciated him and everything he’d done. “Josh, I don’t think I was being fair to you,” she said. She blew out a breath, wanting to set things right between them. “Josh, you and I have been friends for as long as I can remember, and you know I care about you and would never do anything to hurt you.”
“Em, I’d never do anything to hurt you, either,” he said softly, his gaze going over her face. She looked exhausted. Exuberant, but exhausted, nonetheless. He couldn’t help but feel a strong admiration for her. She was handling her situation with dignity and aplomb and he couldn’t have been prouder of her.
“I know. It’s just that I want you to know that I really do appreciate all of your concern and your help, even if I haven’t exactly acted like it.” She stepped closer. “It means a great deal to me Josh, especially now, in light of the circumstances.” She laid a hand over her belly, before glancing up at him, a gloss of tears shimmering in her eyes. “Josh, I promise I’ll try to stop feeling so defensive just because you’re concerned about me and the baby.”
“Em?”
“What?” She blinked up at him, then sniveled.
“Speaking of defensive.” With a grin, he held up the roses. “Since I’ve just accepted stolen property, that makes me an accessory after the fact. So when Sheriff Fitzpatrick arrests us, we’re both going to need a defense attorney.”
She laughed, realizing Josh was telling her all was forgiven. “Thanks, Josh.” Relieved, she stood on tiptoe and kissed his cheek. The scent of his cologne infiltrated her senses, making her sigh.
She looked into his eyes and saw so many things she’d never seen in a man’s eyes before, not even her husband’s.
Kindness. Caring. Concern.
They moved her and made her feel more ashamed than ever for her behavior toward him, and more determined not to let her fear over letting a man get close to her override her common sense.
Again.
“I hope you don’t mind, but I thought I’d just come straight here and get started,” Josh said, shutting the door behind her. He headed toward the kitchen to put the roses in water.
“Get started?” she repeated, crossing the room and dropping down onto the couch and lifting her sore, tired legs atop the coffee table. She glanced toward the kitchen, then sighed at the thought of all the work that needed to be done to get the house ready for the baby, to make it a real home, the kind she’d always wanted. “Get started doing what?” she called.
“Get started checking the house out and helping you get it ready for the baby.” Dressed in work jeans that had tiny little holes at the corner of the pockets and were worn white in several spots, along with a white T-shirt splattered here and there with paint, she was absolutely certain Josh had never looked more gorgeous.
Good thing they were just friends, she thought, eyeing him carefully. Or else she’d truly have a hard time not…jumping him.
“You’re—you’re going to help me?” she asked in stunned surprise, remembering when she’d told him the other day that she wanted to fix up the house before the baby came.
Absently, he scratched his stubbled chin, his eyes twinkling. “No, Em, I thought I’d stand by and watch you do it all by yourself. Jake and Jared offered to help as well.” He ruffled her hair, then took a good look at her. “Rough day?” he asked, sitting next to her.
“No, just long.” She grinned. “I’ll get used to it. It feels good to be doing something positive, Josh. Even if every bone and muscle in my body is screaming with fatigue.”
“Turn around,” he instructed, turning her so that her back was to him. He began to massage her sore, aching shoulders and Em’s eyes closed and she moaned in pleasure.
“Oh, Josh, that’s positively sinful.”
He grinned. “Feel good?”
“Better than good.” She forced her eyes open. “Keep this up and you can hire yourself out. Give up the paltry funds you make lawyering, and you could get rich hiring yourself out as a masseur.”
“Now there’s a thought,” he said, pretending to give it serious consideration before moving his hands to the tight muscles in her neck.
“This is blissful,” she said with a sigh, enjoying the touch of his hands on her skin. Her body.
Unable to speak, she merely let several little groans slip from her as he continued to work the tightness and the tension from her neck and shoulders.
“So…how’s it going?” He was so close, she could feel his sweet, warm breath fan the back of her bare neck. It sent a shiver racing over her as well as an ache she couldn’t quite get a handle on at the moment since she was far too distracted.
“Mmm, good,” she murmured without turning around. “Really good. That is if you don’t count the tray of salads I dropped—”
“Ah, not your fault, Em. I’d say that was interference,” he said, admitting his part and massaging small circles into her lower neck,
“And then of course, this afternoon I accidentally dumped a bo
wl of chili on old man Weaver.”
“Can’t think of a better place for it,” he admitted absently, fascinated by the silky skin at the nape of her neck.
She shook her head. The former principal of the Saddle Falls High School had always been a cranky curmudgeon. “How can that man still be such a crab? He was a crab when we were kids, and he’s even worse now.”
“Hey, at least he’s good at something,” Josh murmured, still staring at the glorious skin on her neck.
He fought the urge to press his lips there, to see if the skin was as soft, as silky as it looked. “So, you think you’re going to be able to handle things?” he asked, struggling to get his thoughts under control.
“Yep,” she said confidently, letting out another soft moan when Josh’s thumbs pressed on a particularly sore spot. “Definitely,” she added more firmly, hoping he’d finally drop the idea of talking her into selling the diner.
“Em?”
“Hmm?” Eyes closed, she all but swayed against him. He was successfully rubbing all the day’s kinks and cramps from her throbbing aching muscles.
“I’m sorry about the past week.”
“Which part?” she asked with a laugh.
“Well, all of it, I guess.”
She turned to him, her gaze soft. “Well, you’re forgiven, Josh. But let’s make a deal. I promise that if I need any help or if I’m not able to handle something, you’ll be the first to know.”
“And what’s my part of the deal?” he asked suspiciously.
“You promise to try not to worry. To try to remember that I’m not twelve any longer, and if I need something or want something I’m old enough and smart enough to ask for help.”
He thought about it for a moment. “Deal,” he said, extending his hand.
She shook it, relieved. “Thanks, Josh.” He continued to hold her hand, his skin soft, warm and comforting.
He glanced at his watch. “You’ve got just enough time to soak in a tub before the pizza gets here.”
“A hot bath and a pizza?” She grinned, then let him help her to her feet and lead her down the hallway toward the master bedroom. Her hand fit perfectly in his, she realized. And it felt so comfortable, so natural. She caught a hint of something sweet and floral, then stopped, turning to him. “What is that heavenly smell?”
“Bubble bath,” he said. He shifted his weight uncomfortably. “I—I remembered how you used to dream about taking long, luxurious bubble baths. So I stopped and picked some up some bubble bath for you on my way here. Martha Powers says this stuff has all the emollients your skin needs to keep it soft, especially during pregnancy.” Looking into those gorgeous eyes of hers, he wasn’t going to think about how soft her skin already was. And whether or not she was that soft all over. “And…and…” He was losing his train of thought, looking into her beautiful eyes.
“And…?” she asked with a lift of her brow, wondering why he was tongue-tied. Josh had never been shy or tongue-tied, at least not that she could ever remember.
Struggling to get back the thread of conversation, Josh averted his gaze to somewhere over her head. “And, she said that it has something in it to ease sore, aching muscles.”
“So it’s a miracle cure, is that what you’re telling me?” Em laughed, touched beyond measure by his thoughtfulness and his kindness. “Is Martha still working at the pharmacy?”
“Yep. She’s going to be there until they wheel her out,” he said with a laugh, not adding that Martha had also asked him a gazillion questions about just who he was buying expensive bubble bath for. It would probably be all over town by morning.
“A massage, a pizza, and a bubble bath.” Em shook her head, not wanting to tell Josh that these small things were absolute indulgent luxuries after the past few months.
As was having someone care about her and be concerned about her and her unborn child. Feeling touched, and more than a bit weepy, Em cursed her hormones. They were obviously acting up again.
Em sighed, banking down the sudden longing that tapped at her lonely heart. There was a time when Josh’s attention would have warmed her scarred heart.
Now, it only frightened her because as much as she could tell herself Josh was just a friend, and only a friend, Em knew that what she told herself and controlling her emotions just might be too separate and distinct things.
Which was why she was suddenly so off balance and yes…frightened. But it was a different kind of fear than she’d faced these past few months when she’d been all alone and so terribly frightened.
Josh’s kindness, his caring made her feel far too vulnerable right now. The past few months had left her so emotionally shaky, she wasn’t certain she was even thinking clearly. All she knew—all she’d ever known—was that no matter what, she had to protect her baby.
And the only way she could do that was to make certain she never put her heart at risk again.
Not ever.
She couldn’t allow her own emotions to blind her to reality. She’d done it once, and never wanted to go through that kind of devastation and pain again.
She knew Josh cared about her…as a friend. And only a friend, she told herself. He’d never, ever given her any indication he’d felt otherwise, and so for her to even be thinking about anything more was both ridiculous and dangerous.
“Thanks, Josh.” She leaned on tiptoe and kissed his cheek again, then drew back slowly, his masculine scent so enticing it almost made her dizzy. She had an unbearable urge to just bury her face in his neck, to inhale that wonderful scent she’d always associated with Josh. Only with Josh. There was a comfort and security with him, perhaps because they knew each other so well, perhaps because she also knew he’d never hurt her.
“But if you keep this up, Josh, I’m going to get spoiled.”
“Spoiled?” he repeated softly, reaching out to brush a strand of hair off her cheek, wanting—needing—to touch her. Just to assure himself she really was all right, he told himself. Pleased that he’d pleased her, he grinned. “Well, Em, I guess that’s what friends are for.”
Chapter Five
January and February’s chill gave way to a mid-March that began to hint at spring. But by the end of March all hints of spring had vanished as summer temperatures bore down on the spring buds with wicked abandon, soaring the temperatures to close to ninety degrees during the day, with barely a cooldown at night, announcing the arrival of an early summer.
In spite of separate air-conditioning units that cranked almost night and day, Doc Haggerty’s small medical office, located two doors down from the diner, was uncomfortably warm on this Saturday afternoon.
The waiting room was elbow to elbow with women in various stages of pregnancy all trying to find some relief from the heat. Apparently Saturday was expectant mother day, Josh thought, feeling a bit out of place.
Dressed in paint-splattered cutoffs and a torn T-shirt, Josh took one look at the assembled group and opted to pace the length of the reception area as he waited for Em. He felt ridiculous in his size fourteen tennis shoes pacing a path in a pastel-pink carpet that was decorated with tiny little baby booties and bottles.
“Joshua?” Hazel, Doc Haggerty’s nurse glared at him over the top of her reading spectacles as he paced in front of her desk. Again.
“Yes, ma’am?”
“If you pace a hole in that carpet, I’m going to send your granddaddy the bill.’
He smothered a grin. Hazel had been with Doc Haggerty as long as anyone could remember. And since Doc Haggerty had delivered Josh and all of his brothers, he figured Hazel was old enough to speak her mind.
“Yes, ma’am.” He hesitated, then leaned toward her. “But what the blazes is taking so long?” Josh glanced at his watch, then commented, “Em’s been in there almost an hour.”
“Babies take time, Joshua.”
“But she’s not having the baby now—” He broke off, his face drained of color and he stepped closer to Hazel’s desk. “Is she?” His heart had j
umped into double time and he could feel sweat dampen his palms.
“No, Joshua, I reckon she’s not or one of us might have heard something about it by now.” Hazel consulted a small card with Em’s vital information on it. Josh tried to peek at the information on it and only earned another scowl from Hazel. “Let’s see now, according to this, I imagine Em won’t be having that baby for about six more weeks give or take a day or two.”
“So then why has she been in there so long?” he asked, slipping his damp hands in his jeans pockets because he didn’t know what else to do with them.
“Josh?” Smiling, Doc Haggerty stood in the open doorway of one of the examining rooms down the hall. “Can you come in here a moment?”
Josh didn’t wait to be asked twice. He bolted around Hazel’s desk and down the hallway. “What’s wrong, Doc? What’s taking so long? How’s Em?”
Laughing, Doc Haggerty patted him on the back. “Josh, if you don’t calm down before Em has this baby I’m going to have to put you on tranquilizers.” He stopped Josh with a soft hand to his arm. “Josh, listen to me. Em’s fine. Perfectly fine. She’s a normal, healthy woman in the prime of her life, and I expect she’s going to have a perfectly normal, uneventful pregnancy.” Doc Haggerty’s bushy brows drew slightly together and his hazel eyes twinkled. “But you’ve got to calm down, son. Between you and your brothers, Jake and Jared, I’m not certain who’s worse.” Both Jake and Jared’s wives were also patients of Doc Haggerty’s. “All this worrying is not good for you, Josh,” the doc continued, “nor is it good for Em to see you like this. It might make her worry, and we wouldn’t want that, would we?”
Flustered at the mere thought that he could be causing Em more stress made Josh realize he had to get a grip on himself. “It’s…just…I’ve never—”
“Yes, I know,” Doc Haggerty said with a laugh, pushing the examining room door wider. Josh could see Em lying on the table, a white sheet draped over her. “Like I told your brothers, the first time is the worst time, Josh. After this, childbirth will be a breeze. And it could be worse,” the doctor whispered. “Em could be the one having twins.”
A Family to Be (Saddle Falls) Page 7
