“I’ve developed a number of talents over the years,” she said calmly, even though her heart was pounding away within her chest.
“Obviously. You never used to lie so well.” He caught her chin in his hand and arched her face up to his, lowering his mouth until not even air separated her lips from his. And he hung there, waiting, for a long moment.
“Fortunately,” Wade whispered, his breath fanning across her face. “I don’t give up that easily. I’ll be around, Nikki”
And then he was gone.
* * *
Long legs trailing out from under her Bronco, Dylan cursed loud and long as he attempted to finish doing something or other with her oil. Nikki sprawled on the grass nearby, listening with amusement. For a guy who pretended not to understand simple English, he was very… fluent in certain aspects of the language.
After one particularly inventive phrase, Dylan muttered, “Eureka,’ and emerged from beneath her car, liberally covered with grease and grime and God only knew what else. She would never understand the love-hate relationship both of her younger brothers had with motor vehicles. “I suppose you’re going to want to come in and clean up,” she said, arching a brow at him.
“Considering I saved you a trip into town and some money changing that oil for you, it’s the least you can do. And I wouldn’t mind supper.”
“Don’t you have date or something going on? I thought you and um, Lauren– is it? were going to see a movie,” she said, shoving herself to her feet and stretching
“Cairey. And we broke up”
Cairey… how could I have forgotten that name? she wondered as she lowered her arms carefully to her sides, her muscles still aching. Studying him, she repeated, “Broke up?”
“Yeah.”
Waiting silently, Nikki stood there watching him
With his back to her, Dylan finished gathering up his tools, his shoulders lifting and falling as he sighed. Finally, he looked over her shoulder at her and shrugged. “It wasn’t working out, Nik. That’s all.”
Nikki continued to stare at him, her head cocked. A lazy summer breeze drifted by, tugging at her hair as she rocked back on her heels, tucking her hand into her pockets. “It took you eight months to figure that out? You used to be a lot quicker than that.”
He sighed, wiping his forehead with his arm before aiming an aggravated glance in her direction. “She was messing around with some guy she met in Frankfort. I didn’t know.”
“I’m sorry.”
Turning his head, Dylan gave her a small smile. “Why? You never liked her. Too shallow, I think you said. Among other things.”
“You did like her, or you wouldn’t have spent all that time with her,” Nikki said, shrugging her shoulders.
“I don’t know if I liked her or not. She was really just a way to pass the time. Just interested in having some fun. That was all I wanted. But I’d just as soon not have fun with her on Friday,” he finished cynically, his eyes cold, “And on Saturday, she has fun with some college kid in Frankfort.”
Nikki followed him into the house, wondering if she sounded as bitter and world-weary as he did. Probably worse.
Nearly an hour later, Dylan mentioned Wade’s name.
Nikki froze momentarily, then she went about adding milk to potatoes as she listened to him. She watched her hands, making sure they stayed steady. Dylan didn’t miss much these days, she knew.
“I saw him and his little girl in the store. Looks like he’s settled in, sis,” Dylan said, leaning back so that his chair was propped on the two rear legs.
“It would appear that way, especially since they’ve been here all summer,” Nikki said dryly. “Feeling guilty you didn’t throw him a house-warming?”
“Naw. But I thought you might be,” Dylan said, shrugging his shoulders. “Seeing as how you two were so close. Pretty little girl”
“Yes. I know.” Without even closing her eyes, Nikki could picture that little girl. So much like Jason. Her eyes started to sting with tears that she quickly blinked away.
“Are you going to tell him?” Dylan asked, his voice close.
Nikki went still as he rested a hand on her shoulder. Her head fell forward and she sighed. “No. It doesn’t concern him.”
“He was Jason’s father. How can it not concern him?”
“Because he wasn’t there. He had his own little girl to raise. Jason was mine,” she whispered savagely.
“Mine. He wasn’t there, Dylan. I had to do it alone. I am not going to share it with him now, so he can try to put together the pieces when there’s really nothing left,” Nikki said, her voice harsh. She shrugged away his hand, moving aside.
“He ought to know.”
“No. I’m not going to dredge it up back up merely to satisfy a father’s rights. It would hurt me too much and I’m just now healing,” Nikki snapped, her eyes flashing at him her younger brother. “If Jason had lived, maybe it would be different. I could handle it if Wade found out and wanted to be involved in his life. But Jason is gone; my memories all I have of him. And I shouldn’t have to share those with somebody who didn’t even know he existed. And it doesn’t concern you, so I suggest you stay out of it.”
Dylan held his hands up and backed away, silently saying, Your call. But I don’t agree with you.
He didn’t have to agree. He just had to keep his mouth shut.
***
Sweat poured down the back over her neck, over her shoulders, to pool into her bra as she pedaled the bike up and over the crest of the hill. As the road leveled out, Nikki wiped a gloved hand over her forehead and tried to steady her breathing. Sports bra, tank top and bike shorts were all soaked with sweat. The muscles in her legs were quivering so badly she could barely keep her feet on the pedals.
Three hours on twisting hilly roads did more to improve her state of mind than anything else could. It had the added benefit of making her so damn tired, she’d probably collapse on her bed and sleep like the dead.
After two sleepless nights and restless days, she’d have given almost anything for one peaceful night of rest.
She rounded the final curve and stifled a groan as the trees gave way to reveal her home and the shiny black Ford Ranger So much for falling into bed right after a quick shower and meal.
Nikki gritted her teeth as she swung off the bike by the porch. She paused only long enough to make sure her shaky legs would hold her before she pushed the bike onto the wooden deck.
Wade and little Abby were perched on the porch swing, moving idly back and forth. She was suddenly the focus of two pair of dark eyes, one shy hesitant smile from the little girl, and a bright easy smile from Wade.
“I don’t recall inviting you up here, Wade,” she said coolly and she opened the front door. Cool air rushed out to meet her and she sighed in relief as she moved inside. Behind her back, she didn’t see the two of them look at each other, or Wade as she sighed and shrugged before scooping Abby into his arms and following her.
“I didn’t know you still rode,” he said after catching up with her in the kitchen.
After draining a glass of water, she turned her head, leveled out the hostility in her eyes before saying, “I was riding before I ever met you. I like it. I didn’t do it simply because you did.”
Then she forced a deep calming breath into her lungs before giving Abby a tired smile. “How are you doing, Miss Abby?”
“Okay,” Abby whispered, looking all around. “You have a pretty house.”
“Thank you,” Nikki responded, her smile a bit more relaxed. It hurt so bad just to look at the child, but at the same time, it somehow soothed her battered heart. “I like it myself. There a TV through there, if you’d like to watch some cartoons.” She pointed in the direction of the living room, wishing she were callous enough to dislike the child simply because of who her mother was.
Moments later, the child safely stowed away in the living room, watching talking mice, Nikki returned to the kitchen She splashed cool w
ater on her overheated face and dried it before turning her eyes to the man sitting negligently at her table. His legs sprawled out before him and in one hand, he had a can of soda.
“Why don’t you make yourself at home?” she drawled, her voice sugar sweet. She soaked a rag with cool water and lifted it to her nape, swiping her neck and chest and arms with it, taking perverse pleasure as his eyes heated.
“Don’t mind if I do,” he returned, sipping at the drink and winking at her over the rim. His eyes, however, lacked the lighthearted tone that was in his words.
As she pressed the cloth to back of her neck, Nikki closed her eyes, trying hard to ignore him, but it was hard. She could feel his eyes on her as she swiped the cool rag over her hot flesh.
The pounding of her heart had nothing to do with him, she insisted. It was from the exercise, only the exercise.
“Need some help?” Wade offered, his voice going low and rough as her eyes opened and she studied him, her face flushed and damp, body gleaming slightly from her exertions.
Recognizing the look in his eyes, Nikki stopped playing with fire and threw the cloth into the sink. “What are you doing here, Wade?” she asked flatly, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning against the counter.
“I came to see you, of course.”
“Why?” she asked, her eyes narrowed, arms crossed tightly over her chest. Hostility all but radiated from her.
“Must be the charming company,” he said, dryly, her anger rolling off his back. He had been in high spirits for several weeks now. Nikki hadn’t been seen around town with Gomer Pyle since that last weekend.
Little rumors were floating around, that Stoner was packing up and leaving town. A For Sale sign posted at the garage confirmed said rumors and he had grinned for an hour after he had seen that. “You being such a gracious hostess and all.”
“You really can’t take a hint, can’t you?”
“You shouldn’t be surprised to see me here, Nikki. I told you I wasn’t giving up,” he reminded her.
“I didn’t say I was surprised. Disappointed is more like it.” Running a fingertip over the rim of her discarded glass, she studied him quietly from under the shield of her lashes. And then she softly asked, “Don’t you think you’ve done enough?”
His cheeks flushed a dull red and he looked away, sighing. “I guess I deserve that.”
“And worse,” Nikki added quietly.
“You’re making this as hard as you can, aren’t you?” Wade demanded, resisting the urge to slam his own glass down on the table. Carefully, he sat it down and stood, his hands going into his back pockets. “Nik, I’m not going away. You might as well get used to that.”
“Oh, you’ll go away. Sooner or later, you’ll figure out that I’m not who I used to be and I’m not somebody you want to be around.” Somber hazel eyes drifted to the sound of childish laughter coming from the living room and she said, “Certainly not somebody you want your daughter around”
“You’ve always loved kids. And I’ve never seen a kid you couldn’t enchant. Why wouldn’t I want you around her?” he asked, watching her.
Nikki turned away, gazing out the window. Finally, she turned her head to him and her hazel eyes were sad. “I’m too morose, Wade. I never think about anybody but myself. I’m grouchy and depressing. I could talk an optimist in his grave within ten minutes. I bury myself in my writing for weeks and could happily ignore the rest of the world, if they’d just ignore me”
He had risen as she had spoke and now was moving up beside her, cornering her between his body and the counter. As he moved closer, he saw the alarm in her eyes, and braced himself. She always struck out when she was feeling threatened.
Never one to disappoint, she tossed her head back. In a voice as cold as winter, she said, “And I can’t look at you or your child without seeing her and remembering what you did.”
Cupping her cheek in his hand, Wade sighed and softly said, “I’m not here to remind you of what I did. I just want to be with you.”
I just want to be with you…
Those words tore at her heart. He made it sound so easy…
“Being with you does remind me,” she snarled, slapping a hand against his chest as he leaned closer. The heat of his body rushed out and filled hers, making her feel more overheated than three hours of trail riding ever could. His eyes, so full of love and promises, seemed to mock her.
Wade was so full of life.
And she was so empty.
“You are making my life a living hell. Don’t you think I’ve had enough of that?” she demanded, her voice shaking with the rage and pain she lived with.
His eyes glittered, the only proof that her words had any effect. Slowly, Wade leaned down and brushed a light kiss across her flushed cheek. “I don’t want hurt you. I never wanted to. I’ll never do it again.”
“Then stay the hell away from me!” Nikki cried, jerking her head back away from his. Shoving both hands against his chest, Nikki tried move him away, but he wouldn’t budge. “You hurt me just by being around me. Stop coming around. Why in the hell are you still coming around?” she demanded helplessly.
“I’m keep coming around because I love you. And you love me,” he whispered, covering her hands with his and leaning down to kiss her averted mouth. One hand caught and held her chin as he rained kisses over her cheeks and closed eyes. “I messed it up the first time, doll. But can’t I have a second chance? I’ll never hurt you again.”
As he covered her damp mouth with his, Nikki quaked. And prayed, first for him to stop. Then for him not to
Wade wrapped his arms around her waist and dragged her closer, dark delight spiraling through him as her arms clamped around his neck and shoulders. He tasted salty sweat and soft skin on his tongue as he trailed a line kisses down her neck. Helplessly, Nikki rocked against him and he shuddered before taking her waist and boosting her onto the counter top.
Moving between her legs, Wade rocked against the vee of her thighs as he covered her mouth for another kiss.
His teeth nipped at her lower lip then darted his tongue into her mouth while one hand pulled her hips to the edge of the counter until only cloth separated him from her. Nikki stiffened slightly as he moved against her but he paid it no heed. She wanted him. There was no denying that…and he wanted her, she could taste it in his kiss, feel in the hungry moan that vibrated up from his chest.
Her belly jumped as he ran his hands down her thighs and unwittingly, she wrapped her legs tightly around his hips, never wanting to let go. For a little while…she could forget.
Cupping her breasts in his hands, Wade dragged his thumbs over the nipples, and she mewled as they tightened and throb under the sturdy cotton of her sports bra. Her hand went back to balance her weight as he grasped the bottom of the shirt in his hands and pulled.
Blood pounded in his temples as she arched against him, a weak moan falling from her lips. Mine, was all he could think. After all the time that had passed, she was still his, in every way that counted. Her words might be saying no, but her body, her clinging hands were saying something totally different
One lean hand cupped her, feeling the damp heat through the thin material of spandex. Nikki vibrated under his hand and whimpered as he massaged the heel of his hand against her damp cleft. He lifted his head and watched as her eyes darkened and her breath caught.
Triumphantly, Wade smiled as she started to convulse under the pressure of his palm. Quickly, he seized her mouth with his just as a rush of liquid warmth soaked both the spandex and his hand.
Mine. And all that mattered was marking her, making certain she knew just how strong his hold on her was.
Intent on peeling that spandex from her, Wade delved his hands inside her clinging shorts, wanting her naked and open; distantly, the sound of laughter and kid’s music penetrated the fog in his brain.
Abby.
“Damn it,” he muttered, his head dropping forward to rest on her shoulder. Nikki was shu
ddering against him, her hands clenching at his shoulders and back. Sweet heaven, Abby. He had totally forgotten his daughter was in the other room, just twenty feet away.
He raised his head looked at Nikki. Her face was flushed, her lips swollen and red from his. Her large dark eyes were soft and unfocused, full of need. Damn it, what timing.
Nikki dropped her head, taking several shaky deep breaths before she released his shoulders and pushed at him. “Let me down,” she whispered, her voice faint.
Wade did so, knowing if he didn’t move, he would take the chance, regardless of where Abby was. Clumsy, she clambered down, stumbling away from the counter. Quickly, she jerked her tank top back on before moving around until the table separated them and then she turned those dark eyes on him, her lips parted as she drew in deep draughts of air.
“Damn you, Wade,” Nikki whispered, her voice rough and unsteady.
Grimacing, Wade agreed silently as he leaned back, adjusting his jeans. He sure as hell wouldn’t be doing much sleeping tonight. “Nothing like a little trip down memory lane,” he drawled, crossing his arms over his chest and waiting.
“That isn’t going to happen again.”
“Ever?”
“Absolutely never,” she swore, her eyes slowly clearing of the fog.
Nikki kept her hands pressed flat to the table, hoping to hide their trembling. Her knees were weak, watery, and she was having trouble staying up right. Hot molten need still flowed through her veins and her loins throbbed.
Idiot. Fool. Why did you let that happen? She asked herself, staring at him from the relative safety of ten feet away, across the solid oak of the dining table. “Never,” she repeated, her voice certain.
Too damn bad she didn’t feel as certain as she sounded. Her knees still felt like water and her brains like mush. Even the thought of what just happened was enough to make her want to whimper with need. All he had done was touch her and she had exploded
“That’s an awfully long time,” Wade mused, drawing one knees up and looping his thumbs through the loops of his belt. His erection strained against the worn denim that cupped him, his stance was cocky and arrogant, his smile full of promise, eyes glinting with need and humor.
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