I cut my eyes to the right and stay silent. In all of my years, I’ve never actually wanted to put someone before myself. I knew in this job that I’d need to. But it’s one thing to say you’ll do it, it’s a whole other thing to actually want to do it. Being selfless is an entirely new experience for me.
I offer a goodnight to Liam and make my way up the stairs. Now that I allow myself to look at the pictures on the wall, I can’t help but smile as I look to Rowan’s beautiful eighteen-year-old eyes. Still so bright and full of life. Flashes of high school enter my mind as I journey up the stairs. Even with a little extra weight, she was gorgeous. Weight is simply a number. Her soul always shined through.
I walk past the room where Chris and Evan are still sleeping and make my way to Rowan’s room. I take a quick look behind me and see that her parents’ door is shut.
Rowan is lying in bed when I walk in. Her caramel hair is splayed across the stark white pillow and the light pink blanket is pulled up to her arms. She snuggles closer, as if she can sense me. I gently close the door and her eyes flit open, an easy smile settling on her mouth. I smile back and marvel at the look in her eyes when she sees me.
“Hey beautiful,” I say pulling out my phone to check the time. “I’m going to crash.” I point over my shoulder.
Her eyebrows furrow and she appears disappointed. “You won’t stay?”
I smile and rub the back of my neck. “I shouldn’t.” The last word is strangled. There isn’t anything I want more than to stay with her. Every night.
She licks her lips and my heartbeat quickens. “Are you being chivalrous, Lark Hawthorne?”
I move to her bed and bend on my knees, skirting my hand to her hair. She keeps her eyes steady on me and her breathing accelerates. “For you, I am,” I reply, kissing her forehead and she moans. Our skin connects and I pull back quickly, shocked at how the sound blazes my insides. My eyes go wide and my blood pumps fiercely in my ears. Rowan sits up and I move closer. She brings her hand to my face, and rubs the light scruff on my jaw. I growl deep in my throat. The electricity between us sizzles and her eyes intensify. They change from light to hunter green in a matter of seconds and without trying, she becomes wild. I see it the moment she bites her lip. My nose flares at her reaction and I kick off my shoes hastily. She pulls the blanket back and scoots over and I climb on top of her, setting my glasses down on the nightstand. Immediately, her legs fall to the side and I settle between them, feeling the warmth from her. The few thin scraps of cloth between us can’t hide our want for each other.
I push myself on her and close my eyes, loving the way our bodies connect so perfectly. So in sync. Being this close to her makes me want to savor every second. My hair falls onto my forehead and I feel Rowan push it back with a gentle hand. When I open my eyes, Rowan’s mouth is open in desire and she smiles. I bring my mouth to her neck and she tilts her head to the side giving me better access. I bite and suck, leaving tiny marks. Marking what’s mine. My right hand moves down her arm and I grip her hand, bringing it above her head. A mewl escapes her mouth and I grind my teeth, pushing myself farther into her. The whimper that comes next sets my movements on fire.
I crush my lips to hers and demand her tongue. Mine seeks out hers, unforgiving and greedy. Her teeth pull at my bottom lip, and her hand skims down my shirt. We break apart and I let go of the hand above her head and pull my shirt off. Rowan lifts her body and does the same, an animalistic smile settling on her mouth as she watches me move. I let my eyes roam over her body and I feel myself harden more to the point of discomfort.
She bites her bottom lip and a greedy look in her eyes tells me she likes watching me work. I grab her hand and bring it to my stomach. The delicate touch of her fingertips causes my skin to break out in goose bumps. She brings her other hand to join the party and before I know what’s happening, she’s pulling at the drawstrings on my pants. My brain screams at her to stop. Because if she doesn’t move her hand from that area right now, things are going to escalate. And I promised myself that if I found a girl who truly reached me deep within my being, that I’d take it slow. But, like the idiot I am, my eyes roll back and I moan a word I haven’t said in years.
“Fuck.”
It drones out of my mouth like slow moving honey and if she wasn’t making me feel so good, I’d be appalled at myself—maybe. Rowan has somehow, in her magical way, made the ugliness seem beautiful.
My reaction spurs her into a frenzy. Her hands push my pants down and her eyes blaze when she sees I’m not wearing anything underneath. I bring my lips back to hers and explore her neck. Her sugary scent engulfs my senses and I lick her collarbone with the tip of my tongue, hoping to get a taste. I frantically grab at the hem of her shirt and pull it over her head, tossing it to the side of the bed.
She lies back down against the white pillows and I take a moment to savor my first real look at her bare skin. Her body trembles under mine and she grabs hold of my hips. The only piece of clothing left is her shorts and I force myself not to remove them. Her round nipples pucker under my scrutiny.
I lower my voice. “Your beauty outshines the sun.”
She blushes and bites her lip, her breathing accelerated. “Are you going to take me, Lark?”
My nerve endings stand on point and I smile. Her lust-stricken voice gets me excited for when I do actually make her mine. Stroking her arm with my hand, I entwine our fingers together and lower my face, my lips a whisper away from kissing her. “I am.”
Her eyes widen and her mouth falls open in delight.
“But, not today.”
Her face falls, and her bottom lip protrudes. I unlock our hands and touch her lip with my thumb. “I’m not going to do this in a house where your parents are ten feet from us and three guys are passed out in the next room. I want you loud and uninhibited. I’m going to take you every way I can. But I promise you, once I’m inside you, you’ll belong to me.” She pushes into my cock with a taunting gaze in her eyes and I growl. “But my chivalry will only go so far.”
My hand skirts down the creamy skin on her stomach, and she moans wantonly. I reach with my other hand and cover her mouth. “Quiet.”
Her eyes challenge but she stays silent and my hand makes its way into her shorts, past her underwear. The soft skin under my fingertips makes me anxious for what’s to come. Rowan widens her legs more. I open my eyes and seek hers out. I keep my hand on her mouth as my other hand skirts down her belly. The moment my fingers find her center, she moans. Teasing her clit with my thumb, she withers with want under my touch. My legs tense and I push my growing ravenous hunger down. I swallow the utter want low my throat and watch as she comes apart. The moment I slip my finger inside her, my sight erupts. It goes glaringly white and my vision tunnels right to Rowan. Her abandoned expression bursts in my mind and I pump my fingers in and out in smooth, rapid motions. God, she feels amazing. So tight and so perfect. And as my thumb works her nub, she grows wetter, and more needy. Her hot breath passes through my fingers on her mouth and I groan. She’s trying desperately not to be loud and damn if it’s not spurring me on.
The guys in the room next to us begin to stir and I pick up the pace. Her eyes grow determined and she attempts to grab at my cock, but I dodge her, wanting her to find her own release before someone decides to come and pay us a visit.
I insert a second finger, and without warning, she comes. She spasms around my hand and I work her as she works through her climax. Her rough mewls and gasps of air escape the fingers that are on her mouth, and she bites my pinky.
“God,” she rasps out, spiraling down. Her hair is stuck to her forehead and her chest is glistening with sweat, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen her more beautiful. Her mouth is red from where my hand was, and she’s got tiny marks from my scruff, but I wish I could see her like this all of the time. She’s been claimed. By me. Something primitive cracks inside me.
Slowly, I remove my fingers and crawl up to her. Kissing her soft, swoll
en lips. She smiles. “That was incredible, Lark.”
Giving us a few minutes, I kiss her with as much passion as I can. I hike her legs around my waist and groan when we connect. She claws at my back, and meets me thrust for thrust. And just when I’m ready to let her go so that she can get some sleep, she flips me over with a mischievous grin.
I clutch the sheets at my side and tense as she moves down my stomach. With just the tip of her tongue, she tastes me. And I don’t know how it’s possible, but I get close to explosion.
“Rowan,” I say. “Sweetheart,” I beg, but she continues, refusing to stop.
I relent. I grab the back of her head and take hold of her hair. Making sure not to push her, but to purely let her know I’m loving every sensation she’s ravaging on my body. I let her bob up and down as she works me into passion. I hit the back of her throat and I have to take the pillow from behind my head and toss it over my face so I can moan. Rowan must peek up at me because the vibration from her laughter sends me spiraling. She grabs the base of my dick with her hand. She sucks and pulls in a slow, torturous pace. I pulse inside her mouth and that tingling feeling that I’m always chasing, but can never quite find, begins barreling up my spine. The slow blistering heat of orgasm works its way to my neck and I tap her head. And as if she knew my body like her own, she releases me just as I come. Spurts of hot liquid hit my stomach and Rowan watches with a playful stare. And after I’m spent, I watch as she moves to her bathroom to retrieve a towel.
Warm and wet, she cleans me up while I watch with rapt attention to her every detail. After I’m clean, she kisses my stomach and walks back to her bathroom. Just before she crosses over the threshold, she winks.
Rubbing my hands down my face, I get out of bed with an easy, satisfied smile. It’s just past eight in the morning now, and the boys next door are making more and more noise as the minutes pass.
Just as I pull my shirt over my chest and tie the drawstring on my pants, their door slams. Quickly and guiltily, I rush to Rowan’s vanity and sit down, attempting to look busy. Rowan, now dressed in a new tank top and shorts, opens the bathroom door wide-eyed and alert, worried I might get caught in her bed. She immediately sees me at the vanity and breathes a sigh of relief.
Someone knocks on her door with loud bangs, and she barrels to her bed and grabs a book, quickly putting on her own black-rimmed glasses. I snatch the closest book and pretend to be reading.
“Come in,” Rowan says loudly. Her face is still dusted with just-had-sex—or close enough—blush and her hair is in knots. She bites at her top lip.
Greg walks in, a cool grin settled on his face. “Morning, Bumblebee.” But his eyes quickly dart to me. I sit up straighter and pray to God that I still don’t have a stiff one.
“Morning, Dad,” Rowan offers. Her eyes look to me, but I’m stuck in place. Do I get up and shake his hand? Does he know that I have a track record for watching her at night? To keep her safe, I mean. Not in a creepy way. Sure, buddy. Sure. Should I just hurl myself out of the window and hope I don’t die because if I stay he might pound his fatherly fist through my chest and kill me? Christ, what was I thinking?
“Oh, Lark,” Greg offers, unaffected. “Still watching over Rowan, I see.”
My shoulders deflate and my heart returns to its regularly scheduled programming. I close the magazine. “Yes, sir.”
Rowan clears her throat and looks down at her book.
“Sleep well?” he inquires.
Rowan’s eyes lift to me and she nods. “Very.”
“Good,” he says simply, turning around, a knowing grin on his mouth. “Enjoy your reading.”
I close my eyes and breathe a sigh of relief but then he says my name. “Lark, enjoy your girly magazine.”
My eyes bulge and I finally look down at the magazine in my hand. Vogue. Nice. I flush. I don’t think I’ve been embarrassed in years. “Uhh,” I stammer, “it’s a good magazine?” The influx of my tone suggests a question and I mentally kick myself.
Greg shakes his head and laughs. He winks at Rowan and leaves us alone.
When he’s gone, I sit back and drag my hands through my hair. Rowan moves to the edge of the bed and I turn to face her. She doesn’t say anything. She plays with her hands on her lap and smiles coyly at the ground.
“What?” I ask. She’s got that look to her. One that lets me know she’s up to something.
“You said fuck.” It’s not a question. She says it and she’s proud.
“I did,” I say slowly, liking the way it feels to let go with her.
“I liked it,” she admits, looking me straight in the eyes. They sparkle bright emerald and I swear I can see myself in them.
I walk to her, grabbing my glasses along the way and place them on my face. I clutch her soft hands, kissing the top of her head. “Me, too.”
And when I leave to get some sleep in my own room, I let the tiniest bit of weight that I’ve held on to for so long float up into oblivion and disappear.
Two weeks later…
HOW DO YOU KNOW once you’ve lost all control? Is there one specific moment in your life that defines chaos? I mean, just, complete and utter disorder. I’m fairly certain this is my moment.
“Lark?” I say gently, snapping him out of his haze. His head turns to me with a quizzical look and he stares at me intently. His cobalt eyes fix on mine. They glow adoration and I have to stop myself from melting into a pool of pleasure.
“Rowan,” he answers.
I smile and let the stomach flutters take over my body. “Do you think it’s possible to find a calmness in this craziness?” In the weeks since we’ve been here, I feel as if my mind and my body are in two different places. Sure, my body is here and it’s happy. It’s with Lark and we’ve become closer, but as the darkness closes in every night, my mind drifts to this place that terrifies me—it mocks me. I’m plagued by the possibilities of what’s to come. The bureau has apparently come no closer to finding the group targeting me, and as the days go by, I wonder if they are staying just out of reach long enough to find me.
Lark laughs, it’s light and throaty and adorable. He’s laughed more since we’ve been here than I think I’ve ever heard him. “Our craziness?” He shakes his head and rubs the back of his neck. “I don’t know. Maybe? Jennings and Whitley found it somehow.”
I let my head fall back on the porch swing, the gentle movement lulling me. “They’ve had a hard time.”
Lark nods, shifting us so I’m sitting against his body. He wraps his arm around my shoulders and I sling my arm around his chest. “They did. Did I tell you what happened my junior year?”
“Of college?” I ask for clarification.
He nods. “Yeah. I didn’t find out until later, but Jennings had a crazed fan. She actually kidnapped Whitley.”
I gasp and sit up straight, stunned. “She what?” I gulp. With eyes wide, I wait for Lark to continue.
“She took Whit to a home in the middle of nowhere and baited Jennings to come find her.”
“Oh, god.” I cover my mouth. “Did she hurt her?”
His expression is fierce at first. He nods, angry and disgusted. But after a few seconds, a proud smile settles on Lark’s face, as if he’s replaying the story in his head. “Whit fought hard, though.”
If there were one person who would come out the fighter in any situation, it would be Whitley Hayes. From the stories she’s told me, I’d say she’s pretty damn brave. “Wow. I didn’t know it got that bad.” Shivers run through my body when I begin to let myself believe something like that could happen to me.
But her situation is different, I’m sure being with Jennings isn’t easy. The guy was incredibly famous when we were younger. Even more so now, actually. I’m not nearly as noticeable as he is.
Lark bobs his head. “They’ve had a rough go, but they pulled through.” His hand rubs my arm reassuringly. He kisses the side of my face, his lips lingering on my skin and murmurs, “It’ll be okay. That won’t h
appen to you.”
I close my eyes and my body softens. I lie back against Lark and watch as the light drizzle of rain falls from the dark gray sky. The sun to the west casts vibrant rays through the clouds and every so often, the water will create a rainbow effect.
We haven’t gone out much since we got here. A small trip to the store in the early morning hours, a round of golf at the club on Monday morning, but for the most part, we’ve cooped ourselves up in this little, old house on the wrong side of the tracks, and somehow, we’ve found some solace.
We’ve played every board game imaginable, and I’ve lost every damn time. These men are good at everything. Most games end with Liam and Lark arguing over who “technically” won, while the rest of us watch and take notes. It’s usually better to let them just work it out. Like most brothers, they fight and bicker. Chris and Evan seemed to have bonded quite a bit, as well. They tend to work together more than with Lark or Liam. Which I think is fantastic. And when they come together, they are a force to be reckoned with. They’ve all found a groove and it’s working well for everyone.
Mom and Dad have both acclimated well to us all being here. I think they’re just happy to have a full home. It’s only ever been me. So having a house filled with rowdy people makes for some fun. Even when I was younger, the house was never really lively with kids. I think they’re soaking it all in while they can.
“Can I ask you a question?” I swivel my head and look up to Lark.
“Anything,” he says, kissing the top of my head.
“Why haven’t we visited with your family, yet?” I’ve been afraid to ask but we are coming close to going home, and I’d like to see where he came from. Meet his mom and understand why Lark is Lark.
He breathes in deep and he adjusts the blanket on our laps. “Do you want the truth or the lie I keep telling myself?”
I give him a level look and raise my eyebrows. “You already know that answer.”
He gulps and his brows furrow. His blue eyes look away from mine and it makes me scared to hear what he’s about to say. “The lie is I don’t want to compromise you. That I’m worried if I let anyone else see you, it could put you in danger.”
The Truth of a Liar Page 13
