Clara advanced to the side of Dan’s bed. She was shocked at the physical changes to the once strong and outspoken man. “Hello, Dan.”
He opened his eyes and stared at her. He looked to his daughter. She smiled at him. “This is Eli’s niece. This is Clara. You remember her, Dad.”
Recognition dawned in his eyes. He motioned with his right hand. His daughter brought around a dry-erase board and marker. He wrote on the board and Opal held it up for Clara to read.
I miss Eli. He was a good friend.
Clara grasped his hand. “You were as dear to Eli as a brother.”
He nodded. A tear welled in his eye and trickled down his cheek. Opal dabbed it away. “Clara has something she wants to ask you, Dad.”
Clara squeezed his hand. “Eli gave an important document to you. It contained his final wishes. Can you tell me where it is?”
Dan shook his head back and forth. Clara tried again. “Try and remember where you put it. It was important, so I know you took care of it.”
Dan continued to shake his head. He pulled his hand from Clara’s grasp and reached for the marker and board. Opal held it still while he wrote. When he was finished, he pushed it toward Clara. She picked it up. Never gave me anything.
Her heart sank. “Are you sure? It would’ve just been a couple sheets of paper. You might not think they were important unless you knew what they were.”
He shook his head and wrote on the board again. This time, he wrote Nothing.
Clara struggled to hide her disappointment. She patted Dan’s hand. “Thank you. You get well right quick. I’m praying for you.”
He shrugged. Clara surmised that he didn’t expect a full recovery. She thanked Opal and then walked out into the hall with Paul. He said, “Now what?”
“Unless the sheriff comes up with something, we are going to let Ralph sell the farm.”
“Why don’t we call and see if he has come up with any information?”
To Clara’s dismay, Nick Bradley had been unable to turn up anything new on Ralph. Ralph’s attorney was blocking their moves. He had located Eli’s attorney but the man did not possess a copy of Eli’s original trust. Eli held the only copy.
She hung up the phone and turned to Paul. “That’s it. It’s over.”
* * *
Clara sat in Charlotte’s kitchen with Charlotte, Anna and Helen. Charlotte was busy sweeping the floor.
Clara’s heart was almost too heavy for words. “That is the end of it. No one knows who my uncle was talking about. Dan Kauffman was my last hope, and he says Eli did not give the documents to him. Ralph owns the farm, and I can’t afford Sophie’s surgery.” Clara squeezed her eyes shut to stem the flow of tears.
“Do not despair,” Anna said. “Your church will help pay for her medical care.”
“We are a small congregation. I can’t ask them to carry such a burden.”
“So you are too proud to ask for help?” Charlotte continued with her sweeping.
“My pride has nothing to do with this. The surgery will cost many hundreds of thousands of dollars. We are a poor community. How can I ask this for my child when others may go without shoes for their children?”
“That’s pride,” Charlotte said flatly as she opened the door and swept the dust outside.
“How so?” Clara demanded.
Charlotte turned around with one hand on her hip. She shook the broom handle at Clara. “Because you believe you are the only one who should bear this unbearable burden. We are commanded by God to care for one another. You would take away another’s chance to do as the Lord bids because you do not think it is fair to ask. Are you the judge of right and wrong in the world?”
“You know I am not.” Charlotte’s word bit into Clara’s self-pity.
“When a man has only two loaves of bread in his house, and he gives one to a person in need, is he not more pleasing in the eyes of the Lord than a person who has many loaves and gives only one? If you believe you cannot ask your fellow Christians to comfort the sick, to care for widows and orphans or provide a child with lifesaving surgery because they are too poor, are you not saying that your judgment is greater than God’s? I would call that pride.” Charlotte turned to the refrigerator. “Are there any cinnamon rolls left? I believe Juliet would like to sample one.”
Anna and Helen exchanged smiles. Helen pulled a plastic bag down off the refrigerator. “Juliet is welcome to sample these.”
“Danki. Is your mother coming to the sale? Juliet and Clyde would like to meet her. As would I.”
“I told her not to come. I think it would be too upsetting for her.”
“You make up the minds of a lot of people, don’t you?” Charlotte took the bag of rolls and went outside.
Anna smiled at Clara. “Charlotte has a unique way of looking at the world but in one thing she is right. You should not take away the chance for people to do something good for others because you think they are too poor. Those that can give will give. Those that cannot may find other ways to aid you. Stop trying to carry this burden alone. It will take longer but we will raise the money you and Sophie need.”
“If only I can be sure she will have that extra time.”
“You will speak to Bishop Barkman about joining us in our plans for fund-raising?” Helen asked.
“I will,” Clara answered.
Charlotte came back inside. “Juliet took it down to the river to wash and it fell apart in her hands. The look she gave me was quite a scold. Have you offered your cousin your forgiveness, Clara?”
“I have not,” Clara said bitterly. “I know that is wrong with me but I can’t forgive him for making my baby suffer.”
“That is very small-minded of you, and not very Amish. Jesus forgave the men who nailed him to the cross. Anna, are there some grapes that Juliet might enjoy? They don’t fall apart in the water when she washes them.”
“You will find some on the bottom shelf in the refrigerator. I hope she likes the red ones.”
“I don’t know. I will have to ask her. Holding bitterness in your heart is a lot like filling it with hot tar, Clara. It spreads easily but it is very hard to remove and nothing good can grow where it exists.” Charlotte took a few grapes and went out the door again.
Clara shook her head, amazed at Charlotte’s ability to make her point in the most roundabout fashion. “I’d like to go back to Eli’s house one last time. Helen, can you watch the children?”
“Of course.”
* * *
When Clara entered her uncle’s house later that afternoon, she found Paul sitting in the living room. A single lamp glowed on the table beside him. He had her family bible on his lap. “What are you doing here, Paul?”
“Finishing up some last-minute details. I’m wondering who I can ask to buy your bible cabinet for you. I’ll be happy to reimburse them. It shouldn’t be separated from your family or from this bible.”
She sat down in the chair beside him. “Having the bible is enough.”
“Do you know these verses by heart?” he asked as he ran his fingers over the carvings.
She looked at the beautifully crafted cabinet. “Some of them.”
“They must have meant something special to the man who carved out those letters. I wish I knew who he was.”
“He must’ve been a man of faith.”
“Genesis 1:1,” Paul said.
“‘In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth’—I know that one.” She also knew Paul was feeling low on her account. She wanted to see him smile.
“The next panel on the front says Isaiah 26:3.”
She shook her head. “I’m not sure of that one. Will you look it up for me?”
He thumbed his way through the book until he found what he was looking for. “‘Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed o
n thee—because he trusteth in thee.’”
Clara tried to absorb the words. “It’s hard sometimes to keep our minds on Him when there is so much going on in our lives.”
Paul nodded. “I need to work on that, too. The left side is inscribed with John 3:16.”
“That is one we all keep in our hearts. ‘For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.’”
“Matthew 5:44.” Paul spoke so softly she had trouble hearing him.
“I don’t believe I can quote that one.” She waited until he found the proper page.
“‘But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.’ Makes a man wonder if the craftsman knew Ralph would fulfill that description.”
“This one I have not lived up to,” she said quietly. “I have not blessed him, I have not done good to him nor have I prayed for him. Perhaps all this trial is God’s way of pointing out the error of my ways. I’m ashamed to admit that I have been a poor Christian. I have not held true to my promise to forgive others.”
“Philippians 4:13.”
She knew that one. “‘I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.’ You would think the bible was talking about Sophie’s illness but I think this one is meant for me. It will take more strength than I have without God’s help to forgive Ralph.”
She read the next one off the cabinet. “Proverbs 22:6.”
Paul smiled. “My aunt’s favorite. ‘Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it.’ Daniel 6:22,” he said.
Her gaze snapped to Paul’s face. “Daniel? Oh, Paul, you don’t think that’s what Eli meant?” Clara moved to the edge of her seat.
“Why didn’t we think of this before?” He quickly found the book of Daniel and leafed through it. Nothing. He held the book up and shook it. No loose papers fell out.
Clara sank back in her chair. “Read what it says.”
“‘My God hath sent his angel, and hath shut the lions’ mouths, that they have not hurt me—forasmuch as before him innocency was found in me, and also before thee, O king, have I done no hurt.’”
“I want to believe that I haven’t hurt anyone but how can I ever be sure?” she asked, looking at Paul.
“The bishop says only God is perfect. We are not—but we must strive to be. He says we are not judged on our success, only on the efforts we make.”
“What is the last scripture?”
“Romans 12:2.”
“‘And be not conformed to this world—but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect will of God.’” He closed the book. “I should get going. It’s going to be a long day tomorrow.”
“I hope you know none of this is your fault.”
“Knowing it and feeling it are two different emotions.” He rose, placed the bible in the cabinet and lowered the lid. “Don’t forget to take it out before the bidding starts.”
“I won’t.” They walked together to the front door and out onto the porch. Clara gazed at Paul, wishing he would offer her the comfort of his arms. She knew the longing must be written on her face. If it was, he chose to ignore it, and he walked away.
Chapter Thirteen
The morning of the auction, Clara saw Paul’s entire family pitch in to help him. Two of his cousins, wearing vests with yellow stripes, began directing traffic into the farm. Buggies, pickups and automobiles soon lined the lane and spilled over into fields beside it. Clara couldn’t imagine so many people would be interested in her uncle’s machinery and household items. More members of the Bowman family carried out beds, tables and chairs. Her family’s beautiful bible cabinet was carried out last. The sight of it sitting on the grass was the last straw for her. She couldn’t stop the tears that ran down her cheeks.
Toby grabbed her hand. “Don’t cry.”
“I can’t help it. I know they are only things with no true value but they are things I wanted you and Sophie to have. They are part of the history of our family.”
“Don’t worry.” Paul spoke from behind her. She didn’t turn around. She didn’t want him to see her this upset.
“I’m okay.” Her voice quavered and she knew she hadn’t fooled him.
He laid a hand on her shoulder. “I have asked my uncle to purchase the bible cabinet for you to keep. It’s my way of apologizing for this.”
She turned around then. “I was going to bid on it but I doubt I have enough money to purchase it.”
“It will belong to you and your children once again. It will be the last item for sale.”
“Danki, Paul.”
“I wanted to do something.”
“None of this was your fault. I don’t blame you for doing your job. I hope my uncle’s things bring a fine price so that you can collect a good commission. You have earned it.”
“Not yet I haven’t. I’ll get started in ten more minutes. I would give anything not to have to go through this. Are you sure you want to stay and watch?”
She heard the pain in his voice and knew how badly he felt. His hands still rested on her shoulder. She tipped her head to press her cheek against his fingers. “‘Not my will, oh, Lord, but Your will be done.’ I want to stay. I want to hear this speaker system you value so highly. I want to see if you are as good an auctioneer as you claim to be.”
“I have never met a stronger woman than you are, Clara Fisher.”
She managed to smile at him. “Clearly, you have been associating with the wrong kind of women, because I am nothing special.”
“I happen to disagree with that statement. We can argue about it later. I have to go.” He left her and made his way through the crowd to his van, which had been set up in front of the barn.
Toby jerked on her arm and pointed. “Mamm, I see Grossmammi.”
Clara looked in the direction he indicated. Her mother was walking up the drive with her friend Stella. With a glad cry, Clara rushed to embrace them. “What are you doing here? How did you get here? I’m so glad to see you. Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?”
Her mother laughed softly. “One question at a time.” She gestured to two Amish men standing behind Stella. “I’d like you to meet Alvin and Orrin Mast. They arranged for a driver to bring us here. I couldn’t let my brother’s belongings go into the hands of strangers without being here to support you. I know how much his gift meant to you and I know how bitterly we all regret that it has been stolen from us. We will raise the funds for Sophie’s surgery some other way. Now where is my little girl? And who is this big strong boy beside you?”
“I’m Toby, Grossmammi. Don’t you remember me?”
“Toby? Why, you have grown a foot since the last time I saw you.”
“I can’t believe you are here. Would you like some coffee and rolls?” Clara asked. “Paul’s family is providing the refreshments.”
“We stopped on the road for breakfast,” Stella said. “I’m sorry Ralph has stolen your property. We must pray all the harder that he sees the error of his ways and repents before he is called to meet his maker. Is he here? Perhaps if I spoke to him.”
“I saw him arrive a few minutes ago. I knew he would be here to collect his money before the day is over.”
“I know this is disappointing but you must not let bitterness take root in your heart. I’m sure that Eli intended to provide for you and the children.”
“I am sure, too. But we were never able to locate the document. Eli said in his last letter that he had given it to Daniel for safekeeping but Dan Kauffman knew nothing about it.”
Her mother’s eyes widened. “He said he gave it to Daniel for safekeeping?”
; “Ja.”
“Was that in the letter I forwarded to you?”
“It was.”
“No wonder Eli didn’t explain what he meant. He thought you would still be with me when you read it.” A slow smile appeared on her mother’s face. “Toby, run and tell the auctioneer to delay starting the sale.”
The boy took off. Clara stared at her mother. “Do you know the Daniel he meant?”
“I believe I do. Where is Ralph? I’d like to speak to him.”
Clara looked over the crowd. Ralph stood beside Paul’s trailer. Toby opened the back door and climbed inside. Ralph must’ve heard what the boy said because he turned a fierce scowl in Clara’s direction. She motioned for him to come over. He tromped toward them, looking angrier than she had ever seen him. Paul and Toby followed him.
“What is the meaning of this delay?” Ralph demanded.
“Hello, Ralph.” Clara’s mother looked him up and down. “You have created a great deal of trouble for your cousin and her children. You should be ashamed of yourself. What would your mother say if she were alive to see this?”
“I’m not causing trouble for anyone. Eli signed the farm over to me. Clara is the troublemaker. She brought the sheriff into this. The Amish don’t invite the Englisch law into their business.”
“But you are not Amish,” Paul reminded him. He stood with his hand on Toby’s shoulder.
Ralph rounded on him. “Get this auction started.”
“Are you Paul Bowman?” Clara’s mother asked.
He nodded once. “I am.”
“My daughter has told me many good things about you.” She glanced between Clara and Paul. “I can see for myself that she was right. Before the auction gets started, Ralph, I want you to know I forgive you.”
Clara swallowed hard and closed her eyes. She had to mean it if she said the words. She waited for God’s presence to fill her heart. “I forgive you, Ralph. I pray you will see the error of your ways and mend them.”
“Fine. I’m forgiven.” His voice wavered. Clara knew he had been affected by her and her mother’s words.
His New Amish Family Page 16
