by Sarah Thorn
Could he fall in love with a woman this way? Would he really be able to do that?
He put one hand over his mouth and debated the thought.
He turned so that his legs would swing off the edge of the bed and touched his feet to the cold floor. He immediately pulled them back up and pushed them into a pair of slippers Beth had gotten him as a Christmas present.
He reached into the drawer in the stand by his bed and pulled out a writing board with a small piece of chalk. He didn’t want to waste paper just to write the same thing over and over.
He leaned over the board and began to write. He only wrote a few words before he used one sleeve to wipe it clean. He wrote again. He started again.
I am looking for someone to be a wife and mother to my two children. I seek companionship, someone strong and who will be kind and gentle with them.
It was a start. Edward looked at it and ran the words through once again in his mind. He needed the woman he brought over to be the best mother he could provide for his little ones. He wasn’t about to sacrifice their happiness for his. If it made him miserable, he would live with it. But if she was good for his children, he would accept it.
****
Chapter Three
It wasn’t the first time Gabby wondered why her brothers were not living in huge houses far away from her. They had houses. Why weren’t they there?
They came bursting into the kitchen just like they always had, talking loudly about some political thing or other, Lincoln was doing this, Lincoln was doing that. Good for them. She didn’t think about that kind of thing. She thought someday she might go back to their homeland and see how things were there.
She stayed seated at the table, responded with “Morning” when they greeted her and looked down at the newspaper Aeden tossed down onto the table. They both went to the stove and poured a cup of coffee from the pot for themselves. As they headed back to the door, she lifted the newspaper and waved it at him.
He shook his head. “Already looked through it, Gabs. You keep it and give yourself something to do today.”
She turned back to the table so he wouldn’t see the resentment and disdain on her face. “Thank you.” She murmured. Give her something to do? Gabs? She wasn’t sure how much longer she could take it.
She snorted. The newspaper was filled with political information that she didn’t care for. She flipped through it and scanned each page. Her eyes stopped when she saw a small paragraph in the section that held the advertisements. A soft chill ran over her arms as the idea formed in her mind.
Freedom.
She sucked in her breath and grabbed the paper, focusing on the ad. It was a way to get out. Her brothers would be forced to care for her grandparents and she could have her life, for the first time in her life. She stood up, letting the chair scoot violently back behind her.
They would soon know how much work it took to make this house run, to keep it clean and to keep her grandparents alive and healthy. She was sure they would do it, that her grandparents would be healthy and cared for. There was no way her brothers didn’t have that kind of compassion.
She moved through the house and up to her room, knowing the path so well, she didn’t even look up from the paper. In her room, the large desk her grandfather had made for her when she was just a child sat waiting. She pulled the chair out, set the paper down and sat. It would only take one piece of paper, some ink and an envelope and her life would change dramatically.
I am wanting to answer the ad for the bride to come to Buxley. I am 23 years old, have long red curly hair, green eyes and I am slender but strong. I have been caring for my elderly grandparents since my brothers and I lost our parents in an accident some years ago. I am looking for a change of scenery, a change of pace. I am willing to care for your children, as I said I have been doing that kind of thing for some time now. Please let me know if you have any questions I should answer before you choose and if you will respond with further information as to how to proceed.
Gabby looked down at the letter and pondered whether it sounded to abrupt or rude or in a way that she would not accept herself if she was him. That confusing thought did no good when it came to her intentions. She tilted her head and reread it a third time. By the time she was done, she was satisfied with it and hurried to find an envelope. She would take it to the post straight away. She couldn’t help wondering how long it would take to hear back from him.
As she rode into town on her horse, Amazon, she began to feel excited. She wasn’t used to her heart beating so quickly. It was as if she saw a light in front of her and she was hurrying toward it as fast as she could. What would her life be like? Would she love the man she was going to marry?
Her breath came and went rapidly, as if she was the one running and galloping instead of Amazon. She gripped the reins tightly.
Gabby’s mind swirled around the possibilities. She had so many hopes and dreams, she didn’t even know were lurking in the back of her mind. And apparently deep down in her heart.
She felt the strange sensation that she wanted to cry. She rarely cried about anything. The last time she cried was at the funeral of her parents. She hadn’t felt happy since then. But now…it was strange to her. She wanted to be away from here, finally living her life. But she was going to miss her grandparents. And in some strange way, she was going to miss her brothers.
But not much.
She passed the store her family owned and glanced inside. Donnie was standing in the front of the store, talking to another man. He looked like he was having an intense conversation. The other man was a stranger to her, which was odd. She thought she knew everyone in town.
It was of no consequence. She wasn’t going to stop and tell her brothers her plans. She wasn’t even going to tell her grandparents until she heard back from this Edward. She moved on from the store. The post office was just down from it, only four buildings. She rode up to the front and got down from Amazon, satisfied that she was doing the right thing. She had prayed for something to happen to change her life. It was as if God himself had put the paper in front of her so that she would see it and respond.
Was that what the Lord wanted for her?
She looked up just before she went into the building. “I hope so, Lord, because I’m doing it.”
As the train rolled along the tracks and Gabby looked out the window, she thought about what her brothers and grandparents had said when she told them what she’d done. She liked the letter she got back from Edward. He sounded nice. He sounded kind. And he sounded a little desperate. But not so much so that she questioned what kind of man he was. She was certain he would prove to be a good man for her. She had prayed very hard. It felt right to her.
Her Nana had been the only one who really showed any emotion when she announced her plan during dinnertime. Her brothers had spent the good part of the night, even after her grandparents were sound asleep in bed, trying to convince her that she was making a big mistake. She didn’t hesitate to point out that the only reason they were acting that way was because they didn’t want to take on the burden of caring for their grandparents. They had vehemently denied it but they had no other excuse to keep her around and she pointed that out, too. They were not friendly to her, they treated her like a servant and she was done with it. She told them point blank it was time for them to take responsibility and stop trying to ride off the money of the store. She had even taken her middle name to use in Arizona so that she wouldn’t have to worry about being called Gabby or Gabs.
“I won’t need your money, I won’t need the money from the store, I won’t need either of you. I am going to start my life and there’s not one thing you can do about it.” She had told them. “You heard what Nana said before I took her back upstairs…she said that it was about time I made a change and that she thought it was a good idea. They are both expecting the two of you to step up and take charge of this house. They will need to be taken care of and if you have to take some of that precious money
and get a nurse to stay here, that’s what you should do. But I’m not doing it anymore and you can guarantee I will be on that train three days from now.”
She hadn’t felt bad in the least when she turned her back to them both and walked out.
“I shouldn’t have to feel bad for getting my life started.” She murmured, not taking her eyes from the passing scenery. “I deserve to be happy and have a good life, too.”
When she reached the train station in Flagstaff, she expected to be met by Edward and took only a few steps onto the platform, looking both ways. She didn’t see anyone.
In fact, the train station was empty. She was surprised by that and stood still for a moment in wonder. No one else had gotten off the train and it seemed no one was destined to get on either. She took a few more steps, noticing that only one side of the platform had a set of steps leading down to the dirt and sparse plants.
When she still didn’t see anyone coming and could think of no reason to go inside the building other than to cool off a bit, she continued to walk in the direction of the steps. She was nearly there when she heard a man’s voice speaking in a tone that made her sure he was talking to a child. She stopped, curious to hear what he said, sure that it was Edward who was speaking. Who else could it be? He must have his son and baby with him.
She listened, a smile growing on her small red lips.
“Come on, son, we have to hurry, we’re already late! We don’t want to make the new lady wait too long out in this heat, do we?”
“No, papa.” She heard the voice of a young boy.
“You are going to be a good boy for her, aren’t you?”
“Yes, papa!” The boy was excited but his voice sounded apprehensive. He was eager to please his father, that was obvious.
She began to walk again, not wanting the man and children to round the corner when she was just standing there, listening.
They met just at the corner. She stopped short and gazed at him. He did the same, looking up at her at the top of the steps.
“Claire O’Reilly?” He said. She nodded, liking that he called her Claire instead of Gabby.
“You are Edward Abbott?”
He nodded at her, taking her in. She set her bags down. Her hair was indeed long and curly and she had only gathered some of it on top of her head, letting the rest fall free around her shoulders. She had no bonnet on, did not care to hide her hair under one of them. Her green eyes flashed at him and her freckled cheeks darkened. He was pleased with the way she looked and his heart fluttered for the first time.
“It’s nice to meet you.” Gabby held out one hand and he took it. After shaking it up and down slightly, he kept his grip on her and helped her take the steps down. She leaned over and looked at the little boy. “Hello, Jonathan. How are you feeling?”
“Good.” The boy was looking at her with a strange look. It was a mixture of wonder, resentment and excitement. He looked a lot like his father. He had the same blazing blue eyes and dark hair. He had long eyelashes for a boy, making his face very attractive. She looked up at Edward again. He was not as fair as his son and she assumed Jon got some of his looks from his mother, even though she felt he looked more like his father.
She looked at the baby Edward was holding in his arms. She was small and pretty. She looked at Gabby and blinked before breaking into a tiny grin. Gabby’s heart melted. She held out her arms to see if the child would come to her. She didn’t move away from her papa, just laid against his chest.
“You want to go to Claire, pretty flower?” Edward said and Claire looked at him with wide eyes. It wasn’t “little flower” but it was too much of a coincidence for her to miss it.
****
Chapter Four
In a week, Claire had successfully immersed herself into the lifestyle. Edward had taken her to the courthouse right away and she didn’t mind at all when they married in front of the judge.
It was so very different from home, from New York, from the disdain and ridicule of her brothers, she felt like a new person. She was happy when she woke up in the morning, listening to the cries of a child she had not birthed but had come to love very quickly.
She woke up early but not as early as her husband. She noticed that although she was up in the very early morning hours, he was gone by the crack of dawn. She wasn’t sure what he needed to do that early in the morning at the vicarage. Did the plants need to be watered that early and the lawn need to be cut that early in the morning?
She had wondered it many times when she woke up during the night to attend to the baby, who was still not sleeping all the way through. She was a pleasant baby. The hardest challenge Claire faced was getting through to Jonathan. He had proven to be a stubborn little boy, insisting that he could care for the baby without her help but never being rude or disrespectful about it.
She held the baby in her arms, cradling her and cooing at her. She was standing in the kitchen, looking out the window, waiting for Edward to come home for lunch. She had made him some ham sandwiches and roasted potatoes, which he expressed great delight with the last time she had made it.
Up until the loss of Beth, they had been teaching Jon to read and write at home. When she passed, he started going to the little schoolhouse in town. He didn’t like it and came home early often, just leaving the school and walking.
She watched to see if he would come home today. Edward would bring him from the vicarage, which was where Jon always walked, if he did. It had been a week and Claire had seen him come home twice in that time.
She saw the dust trail Edward was leaving behind on his way to the house. He was indeed bringing Jon, the little boy riding in front of him on his horse. She smiled and looked down at Emilia.
“Look, it’s daddy and Jonny. We are so lucky, aren’t we? We are two lucky, blessed ladies to have them, aren’t we?”
They got closer, and she could see the brilliant smile Edward was giving her. It filled her heart. She smiled back and waited for them.
“Hello there!” She called out, waving. She lifted Emilia’s hand and made the little one wave. “There they are. See?”
The baby girl looked out at them as they approached. She squirmed a little and looked excited and happy, bouncing in Claire’s arm.
“Look at those two beautiful girls, Jon!” Edward said as he got down from the horse and approached the house. Jonathan ran in front of him and held out his arms to take Emilia from Claire without saying anything.
“Hello, Jonny. Do you want to hold your sister?”
He just nodded, his arms still outstretched. Claire gently lowered the baby and he secured her in his arms before going inside. He was very protective. She just smiled and sighed as she watched him go in.
“Hello, pretty lady.” Edward said as he came up on the porch. “How has your day been?”
“I feel a lot better than I did before,” he said. “You have lunch for me?”
“Of course.” She smiled up at him. He smiled back with a look that made her feel fluttery in her stomach. She was so blessed to have been placed here. “I do hope that Jonathan warms up to me, though. I really do.”
“I know you do.” Edward nodded. “You just need to be patient and give him time.”
“Do you think he will warm up to me?”
Edward ran one large hand through her red hair, his eyes obviously admiring her beauty. “I don’t see how anyone could resist it, Claire.”
She giggled when he put his arm around her shoulders and walked into the house with her. Jonathan had put Emilia in a little basket he used to carry her around and placed her next to his chair at the kitchen table. He already had a sandwich on a plate with two bites taken from it.
“Papa, can I have some potatoes?”
“You can,” Edward said. “Claire will give them to you. You should ask her.”
Jonathan looked at Claire. “I don’t have to have any,” he said, turning back to his plate.
Edward approached him and knelt next to his cha
ir. “Jonny boy. I told you not to be rude, didn’t I?” His voice was soft. Jonathan looked at him with regretful eyes. “I know this is hard for you, son. But you have to trust that things are going to work out okay. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you, would I? I won’t let anything happen to you? Claire isn’t going to hurt you, Jonny.”
“I know.” The little boy’s voice was quiet. He lowered his head, ashamed.
Claire moved to kneel at his other side, looking up at him. “It’s all right, Jon. I will give you some potatoes, okay? Everything is going to be all right.”
Jonathan didn’t lift his head. “Okay.” He murmured.
“What do you say, Jonny?” Edward prompted.
“Thank you.”
“Good boy.” He ruffled the boy’s hair and stood up straight.
The next morning, Claire woke up when Edward did. She felt him move from the bed and waited a bit until she heard the door close as he went out. She got up and went to the baby’s room to check on her. The child was fast asleep.
In his room, Jonathan was also asleep. She cracked the doors to their room so that Jonathan would hear if Emilia woke up. She knew he was sensitive to the baby’s cries and had gotten up several times to check on her when Claire was already in there. She didn’t plan to be gone long. She just wanted to know why Edward always left so early and what he was doing. Her curiosity had taken over.
She dressed quickly and went out the door. She rode quietly to the vicarage, behind her husband far enough so that he wouldn’t see her.
When she reached the church, she dismounted and tied her horse up to a tree in the surrounding park. She moved slowly over the grass toward the cemetery behind the church and looked out over the grounds. She didn’t see him. She frowned and peered a little more closely, running her eyes around the tombstones to see if he was kneeling somewhere. He wasn’t. She circled the building but didn’t see him anywhere.
He must be inside. She thought. She went to the doors and pushed one open quietly, sticking her head inside to look around. It was still very dark in the building. She saw a lamp lit at the altar and slipped inside, closing the door behind her.
