“Nothing! I did nothing!” Callie protested, fired by the injustice of his accusation. “There was no need. Ermanno was furious with Paolo. As disgusted with him as you are with me.”
“Then why didn’t my brother confront me?” Paolo demanded.
“He wanted to. He was prepared to force you to do the honorable thing and marry me.”
“You’ll be saying next that you talked him out of it!”
Restored by a blistering anger, she returned Salvatore’s mocking glare. “As a matter of fact, Signor Rainero, that’s exactly what I did. I had no wish to take a husband who had to be dragged to the altar with a shotgun in his back.”
“A noble sentiment, my dear, but hardly credible,” the old man said scornfully.
“Oh, it’s credible enough,” Paolo interjected. “Especially when you consider how being the mother of twins would have curtailed Caroline’s lofty career ambitions. So she chose the easy way out, and gave away her babies. I suppose we should thank her for not having placed them with strangers.”
“It was for that very reason that Vanessa and Ermanno begged to adopt them—one I resisted, at first, I might add. If I’d had my way, I’d have kept my babies. Giving them up was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.”
“But Ermanno and Vanessa managed to persuade you anyway!” Salvatore crooned sarcastically. “Tell me, signorina, how much did they have to pay you?”
“That’s enough, Father. Let her finish. I can hardly wait to hear the rest.” Paolo’s words cut through the atmosphere, sharp as a knife blade. “Do go on, Caroline. You agreed to their suggestion because…?”
“Because I was barely nineteen, alone, and too young to take on single parenthood with one baby, let alone two. Because Ermanno knew your father would be humiliated by the public disgrace his favorite son had brought on the family name, and your mother would have been crushed.”
She drew a long, shaky breath. “But most of all, because you weren’t fit to be a husband or a father. Even your brother, who loved you dearly, agreed you were nothing but a playboy, and that the last thing I needed was to find myself married to a man incapable of fidelity. So we did what was best for the children.”
“And, coincidentally, what was best for you. You could pursue your dreams unencumbered by guilt or responsibility.”
“Oh, I carried my share of guilt, Paolo, and more grief than you can begin to imagine. Because of one mistake, my entire life changed. No more going to Smith, not when I was sticking out a mile in front, advertising my condition for the whole world to see. No more carefree sharing an apartment with two friends from school. Instead I went sneaking off to university in California where no one knew me, and worked as a waitress to afford the rent on a basement room, where I lived until I went into labor.”
Something crossed his face then, a fleeting expression of such bleak despair that it broke her heart. In that brief and telling moment, she realized the extent of the damage she’d done, and all she wanted was to run to him and kiss away the hurt she’d inflicted. But he spoke before she had the chance.
“You didn’t have to be without money. Whatever else my shortcomings, I’d never have denied you a decent place to live.”
But not a place in your life, Paolo! Not a place in your heart…!
“My pride had taken enough of a beating. I wasn’t about to accept handouts from you, or anyone else.” She spared Salvatore another scathing glance. “Not even from Vanessa and Ermanno, although they tried hard enough to help me out. But they’d done enough in offering to adopt my babies, and the money they gave me I put into a trust account for the children. They’ll inherit quite a tidy sum when they turn eighteen.”
Salvatore curled his lip. “A very touching story, I’m sure.”
“And every word of it the truth.”
“So you say.”
“You’d like to see the trust fund statement?”
“No. I have seen something far more compelling. I have seen the children’s birth certificates. Ermanno and Vanessa are plainly stated as the parents.”
“Those certificates were issued after the adoption took place, as the law requires. But I have a copy of the official papers, which I had to sign in order to make the adoption legal. If that’s not enough to convince you, Signor Rainero, then by all means arrange for a DNA test at a laboratory of your choice, here in Rome, since you have such a low opinion of anything American.”
“Gladly. I will see to it first thing in the morning.”
But Paolo, who’d distanced himself to stand slumped before the fireplace with his back to the room, spoke over his shoulder. “It is not necessary. I accept the truth of what she says, and now I will deal with it—and with her.”
He’d scarcely finished speaking when Gina and Clemente’s high, excited voices carried down the stairs, followed a second later by the sound of their feet.
“My children do not need to witness this,” he said, straightening his shoulders and turning back to face his parents. “Keep them occupied, please, and away from here until I am done.”
“Of course.” Lidia gestured to her husband. “Come, Salvatore. You don’t belong in here, either.”
For once, he didn’t argue. Instead he let her lead him from the room and close the door.
Callie could hear her heart thundering in the silence they left behind. Paolo in his present frame of mind was a force to be reckoned with, and she had only herself to thank for that. “What do you mean, you’ll deal with me?” she asked, fighting to control her mounting dread. “Exactly what do you have in mind, Paolo?”
CHAPTER ELEVEN
IF EMERGING the winner was what he wanted, Paolo knew he’d achieved it. Caroline stood before him, her lovely face drained of color, her big blue eyes glassy with shock, her beautiful mouth—that mouth able to lie so convincingly for so long—quivering helplessly.
But the only victory he’d ever wanted was to win her trust, with the hope that, in time, he’d win her love, too. That she was capable of the kind of monumental deception to which she’d just confessed showed how little he’d succeeded.
Even so, seeing how her body trembled, how she groped for the back of the chair in front of her to keep herself upright, melted the frozen core which, for the last several minutes, had held him paralyzed. Despite everything she’d done, part of him wanted to wrap her in his arms and comfort her. But the betrayal cut too deep. This was not a situation that could be resolved with a quick kiss-and-make-up.
Steeling himself to remain unmoved, he said, “Why don’t you sit down? This could take a while.”
“I can’t imagine it’ll take any time at all,” she said, lowering herself into the chair as if every bone in her body hurt. “What’s left to say? That you’re disgusted by my actions? Furious? Save yourself the trouble, Paolo. How you feel about me is already written plainly enough on your face.”
“This might come as a surprise, but you’re not foremost in my thoughts right now. I’m more concerned about our children, Caroline—about how and when to tell them we’re their parents, and what that news will do to them.”
“Maybe they shouldn’t be told.” She gnawed wretchedly on the corner of her lower lip. “Maybe it’s best to keep the secret and let them go on believing Vanessa and Ermanno are their parents.”
“Even the most closely guarded secrets have a way of leaking out. Already, what until tonight was known only to you, your sister and my brother, is now shared by three more people. The chances of it one day accidentally being revealed to our son and daughter are significant. And even if they weren’t, I’m not inclined to perpetuate a lie that never should have been told in the first place. They have a right to a truth that affects them so profoundly.”
“Then when I tell them, I’ll explain that it was my fault, that I’m the one who chose to withhold it.”
“When you tell them? Oh, no, Caroline, that’s not how it’s going to be. We tell them together—all of it. How it came about that you plac
ed them with your sister, and why.”
“If we do that, they could end up hating both of us.”
“That’s a risk I’m prepared to take.”
“No. You stand to lose too much. They adore you. You’ve been part of their lives from the start, whereas I—” She stopped as a sob shook her, and pressed a fist to her mouth. “I’ve yet to earn a truly secure place in their hearts. My betrayal won’t inflict such lasting damage.”
As it always had, her grief touched him too profoundly. She looked so fragile and alone, huddled in her chair; so innocent! Horrified to find his own throat thick with emotion, he looked away and reminded himself of the enormous deceit she’d practiced. There’d been nothing innocent about that.
“The day has yet to dawn that I’ll hide behind a woman’s skirts,” he said roughly. “I’m not proud of the way my children were conceived, but I’m very proud to be their father, and that’s something I intend to make clear to them from the outset.”
She sighed dispiritedly. “Then let’s get it over with. One look at your mother’s face, and they’ll have guessed something’s terribly wrong. It’s not fair to leave them wondering if it’s because of something they’ve done.”
“My thoughts exactly. They can’t be sent off to bed believing there’s going to be a wedding tomorrow—not unless a miracle occurs and we somehow manage to salvage something worthwhile from this debacle.”
She raised her tearstained face to his. “That’s not going to happen, and we both know it. I’ve made too many mistakes.”
“The most critical of which was in not trusting me enough.”
“I wanted to tell you about the children, Paolo.”
“I’m not talking just about that. Even as recently as tonight, you overheard me say something to my father which you didn’t understand, but instead of showing faith in your future husband, you chose to think the worst of him.”
“What you said sounded so…incriminating.”
“We were discussing my father’s health. Today, his cardiologist told him he’s living on borrowed time and urgently needs open-heart surgery. He’s afraid, not so much of the procedure itself, but of being left an invalid, and becoming a burden to my mother. These are the things you heard us speak of, Caroline…the ‘enemies’ which he’d prefer to ignore, but which must be faced and overcome.”
Consternation, shame, embarrassment—the emotions ranged over her face, one after the other. “I’m truly sorry!” she whispered. “If I’d known, I’d never have confronted him the way I did. I’d have shown him more sympathy.”
“He wouldn’t thank you for it. For a smart man, my father can be incredibly obtuse at times. He seems to think not talking openly about his problem might lessen its seriousness. That’s why he’s yet to confide in my mother.”
She massaged the bridge of her dainty little nose, as if to ward off a headache. “Then how do his lawyers fit into the picture? He was adamant that he wanted to consult with them as soon as possible.”
“He has a horror of falling ill before the surgery can take place, and ending up in hospital on life support. To avoid such a possibility, he wants to draw up a living will.” He shrugged. “As for dealing with Ermanno and Vanessa’s wills at the same time, he feared from the start that you might try to take the children away from us, and believed that the sooner you found out you shared guardianship with me, the sooner your plans would be derailed.”
“You didn’t agree with him?”
“At first, perhaps. You were pretty clear about your intentions, and I admit I thought you posed something of a threat.”
“But you didn’t act on it. Why not?”
“Everyone was raw with grief. We needed to pull together for the children’s sakes, not engage in a tug-of-war over who had control of their future. They’d suffered enough. Then, things changed. I came to see you not as an outsider bent on destroying a family, but a tenderhearted woman incapable of hurting those she loved. All at once, the idea of our joining forces in marriage made perfect sense—not for the usual reason, perhaps, but for very good reasons, nonetheless.”
“None of which ruled out dealing with the wills.”
“True. But we were on the island, the lawyers were here in the city, there were over two hundred miles separating us from them…” He shrugged. “Suddenly it no longer mattered who was named guardian. More important matters had come to the fore. There was a wedding to arrange, a new life to plan, a future to build. The children were excited again, looking forward, instead back. The wills could wait.”
He grimaced, the pain of realizing just how much they’d lost, hitting hard. And all because, in their race to get married, they hadn’t taken the time to build a foundation of trust. A sad case of good intentions gone wrong, and four lives thrown into upheaval because of it.
“Nevertheless, if you’d told me about the change—about us sharing guardianship, things might never have come to this,” she said.
“Are you suggesting learning that would have prompted you to tell me the truth about the twins’ birth? Because if so, I’m not buying it, Caroline. You had plenty of opportunity to come clean.” He swiped a hand down his face, weary of the whole pointless back-and-forth. “Porca miseria, what does it matter? The damage is done, and bickering about who’s at fault solves nothing, and merely delays what we have to do next.”
“Speak to the children, you mean?”
“Yes. I’ll get them. While I’m gone, give some thought to how you want to handle this, because there’s no quick and easy way to pass along the kind of news they’re about to hear.”
They were absorbed in a game of Chinese Checkers with his parents when he found them. Unnoticed, he lingered in the shadow of the arch leading to the day salon, and looked at them as if seeing them for the first time.
His children…his son and daughter! Wonder and dismay swept over him in equal parts. How could have held them in his arms as babies, and not recognized them as his? How have looked into their eyes and not seen the truth?
“Zio Paolo!” Gina glanced up and caught sight of him. “What have you and Zia Caroline been doing all this…?”
His face must have given away too much. Her question dwindled into silence. Her smile wavered. Her little face closed. Tragedy had sharpened her intuition to a fine edge. Without his saying a word, she flinched as if to ward off another unkind stroke of fate, and sidled nearer to her brother.
For Paolo to pretend everything was the same as it had been an hour ago would have been cruel. “I’d like both of you to come with me,” he said soberly. “Caroline and I have something to tell you.”
Without a word they left their game, clutched each other’s hands and followed him down the hall to the library.
Caroline stood next to the hearth, twisting a sodden handkerchief in her fingers. A lamp on the mantelpiece shed a halo around her head, highlighting the pale gold of her hair, but leaving her face in shadow. Even so, the twins saw at once that she’d been crying and, as children usually did when confronted by an adult’s tears, clung even tighter to each other and hung back, more apprehensive than ever.
“Did somebody else die?” Clemente ventured in a whisper.
“No,” Paolo hastened to reassure him. “We do have news that’s going to come as a shock, but it’s nothing quite that bad.”
“Well, whatever it is, it’s making Zia Caroline look sad. Did you have an argument?”
Paolo glanced at Caroline. A tear rolled down her face. Unable to speak, she left him to answer, but now that the moment was upon him, he, too, struggled to find the right words. “We’ve…decided to postpone the wedding,” he began. “We won’t be getting married tomorrow, after all.”
“But you have to!” Gina wailed. “You said you would! You said we were all going to live together, and you always keep your promises!”
Her outburst prompted Caroline to jump in. “Don’t blame Zio Paolo. It’s my fault everything’s changed.”
“Why is it y
our fault?” Clemente asked. “What did you do, Zia Caroline?”
“I kept a secret from your uncle, and from both of you,” she said tremulously. “A secret I should have told you about, a long time ago. I shared it with Zio Paolo just a little while ago, and now I want to share it with you. The thing is…”
She closed her eyes and inhaled a long, deep breath, the kind a person might take before a death-defying leap from a very high cliff into a raging river. “Oh, my darlings, I wish there was a kinder way to tell you this, but I’m afraid there’s no way to soften the blow of what you’re about to hear.”
“So just say it in ordinary words,” Clemente said, fixing her in an unwavering stare. “Just tell the truth. That’s what you’re supposed to do, when you get in trouble.”
Gina inched closer. “Have you decided you don’t love us enough to live with us?”
“Oh heavens, no! I couldn’t love you more if you were my own children, because, you see…you really are my children…and I’m your m…mother.”
Astounded, Clemente said, “How can you be our mother? You’re our aunt.”
Caroline clapped a hand to her mouth and looked helplessly at Paolo, her eyes telegraphing her dismay. Help me!
Pretty choked up himself, he felt no better able to answer his son’s question than she was. He saw the confusion her news had created in his children, and wished he could offer an explanation that wouldn’t rock their world. If ever there was a time to whitewash the truth, it had to be now. But he couldn’t do it. He wouldn’t.
“You’re silly,” Gina informed Caroline bluntly. “You aren’t our mommy. Our mommy’s dead.”
“Yes, she is,” Caroline said, her voice drenched in tears. “And you’re right. She was your mommy in all the ways that really mattered. But there’s more you need to know.”
Gina stuck her fingers in her ears. “I’m not going to listen to you, Zia Caroline! You’re saying bad things.”
The Italian s Convenient Wife Page 15
