Talon had to let Cat go. Finally, he eased his arms from around her and lifted his head from her shoulder. As he looked up into her eyes, his heart crashed. He wanted to cry. Her eyes burned with love and care for him. Just for him. And her mouth, damn, her lips were parted and tears streamed down her cheeks, nestling into the corners of her mouth. She was crying for his sorry-assed soul.
Shaken, Talon stared at her in the thickening silence. No one had cried for him before, except his mother when he was a young child. And Cat was crying for him, for the coming loss of his mother, who meant the world to him. He’d already lost his father. Then he’d lost Hayden. Now…oh, God, now his mother was leaving him, too.
The loneliness gutted him wide-open. The emotional rawness was tempered only by Cat’s arms still loosely placed around his shoulders as she stared without apology for the tears in her eyes. He made a sound in his throat, lifted his hands and used his thumbs to remove her tears.
“Don’t cry for me,” he growled. He wasn’t worthy of her tears. His life was a train wreck. He didn’t deserve this kind of care….
Closing her eyes, Cat felt his callused thumbs brush the tears from her cheeks. Her throat tightened, the lump growing. She wanted to burst out into sobs for him, for what she felt around him that he’d never released. She lifted her lashes as his hands fell away from her face. How she missed his touch! Sniffing, Cat eased her arms from around his shoulders. With trembling fingers, she wiped the tears from her lashes.
“It’s okay to cry, Talon,” she whispered, her voice unsteady. “It’s good for the soul.” Seeing the look in his stormy eyes, Cat knew he wasn’t accepting her whispered words at all. “Think of crying as a way to discharge the infection, the toxins, the awful emotions you’re carrying around inside of you, cleaning you out. That’s a good thing.” Cat reached out, trailing her fingers tenderly across his cheek.
Talon placed a steel hold on himself. Never mind he had an erection pressing painfully against his jeans. Never mind what he saw in Cat’s half-closed, drowsy blue eyes as she’d grazed his cheek. One part of him said she’d touched his cheek out of compassion. Care. The other part, the dark, male part of him, the sexual hunter who wanted her, read her touch as a way to let him know she wanted him.
Talon felt like a mess. He was still sicker than a dog, still had a fever, wasn’t breathing all that well and he’d just talked to his dying mother. No way in hell could he sort out Cat’s response to him. And he cared enough about her not to try. Cat sat there looking so innocent, the compassion clear in her gaze. Getting a grip on himself, Talon forced himself to put his hands on his thighs, not on her.
“Your mom is a fighter, Talon,” Cat said, her voice raspy. “I came to Jackson Hole seven years ago and met her right after she’d gotten cancer the first time. I’d met her at Mo’s Ice Cream Parlor where she worked as a waitress. We became really good friends and when I saw her looking bad one day, I asked her what was wrong.” Cat stared down at her clasped hands in her lap. “I told her I’d be there for her and I have been ever since. Your mom loves books, and when the chemo really got her down and she was too weak to work, I’d go over on my lunch hour when I had the shift at the fire department, and read to her. She loves her books so much.” Cat managed a small smile, holding his flat, dark look. “Maybe…if things work out, you might support her by going over to read to her every once in a while. I know she’d love that. She loves you so much.”
Talon hung his head, grappling with the knowledge. “Yeah,” he rasped, “I know she does. She used to read to me as a kid. I always looked forward to her coming into my bedroom every night and she’d read a chapter from a book.” The memory was sweet. Filled with love. Talon had always looked forward to that special time with his mother.
“Sandy told me,” Cat admitted softly. “Over the years, she brought out all her photo albums.” She gave him a tender look. “I guess you might say I got to know you from the time you born. Sandy is so proud of you, Talon. I knew you were in the Navy, went into the SEALs and she really didn’t have much in the photo album from recent times except for the few pictures you sent back to her when you were in Afghanistan.”
Wincing internally, Talon remembered those photos he’d sent her. They were all of Hayden and him or Zeke. His mother loved animals and he could email her about Zeke. He could never tell her about his missions or anything that had happened on them, but she loved his stories about Zeke. His heart clenched with renewed grief. Cat had seen photos of him and Hayden together, their arms across one another’s shoulders, their M-4 rifles propped on their hips, grinning like fools into the camera after a twelve-hour patrol. He dragged in a shallow breath, the pneumonia still not allowing him to take a deep one.
“I’m glad you’ve been here for my mom,” he admitted, giving her a quick look of sincere thanks. His heart contracted. There were still tears in her eyes. Cat was too easily touched. He felt helpless to fix this.
“Sandy’s a wonderful person,” Cat said quietly. “And I can see so much of her in you. She has been such a strong member of our community. She did a lot of volunteer work before she got sick. Now all those people she’s helped over the years have turned around to help her. You need to know your mom is greatly loved, Talon. Gwen Garner, who owns the quilting store, has her club members see Sandy weekly. In fact, it’s Gwen who gave all of us a monthly visiting schedule. Your mom gets lots of company every day. Gus fixes her a dinner once a week and I drive it over to her. A lot of the quilters make her breakfast or lunch.” The darkness in Talon’s eyes lightened, some of the tension around his hard, thinned mouth dissolved. “About fifty people volunteer to help Sandy. I don’t want you to think your mom has been abandoned. We’ve embraced her and she’s as happy as she can be. And now you’re home.” Cat’s voice grew stronger with feeling. “I know how much she’s been looking forward to this. You’ll give her a level of hope and care none of us ever could. This is the time when she needs you at her side.”
Nodding, he stared down at Zeke, who had laid his head on his thigh. “She sounds so damned weak.” And it scared the hell out of him to realize how close she was to dying. When he’d call her from the Naval Hospital, about once a week, she was always cheerful, upbeat and hopeful. Not now.
Cat placed her hand lightly on his shoulder. “She is weak. It’s the chemo. And I know you’re feeling pretty weak yourself right now. It’s going to take about two weeks for you to throw off this pneumonia and begin feeling halfway human. Did Sandy understand you couldn’t see her right away?”
“Yeah, I lied a little.” Talon absorbed Cat’s touch, desperate for more contact with her. He’d wanted to kiss her. Make love to her. How she sensed his needs was beyond him, but he was grateful anyway. “I made light of my pneumonia because I didn’t want her to worry. She knows I can’t be sick and visit her or it could impact her lowered immune system in a major way.”
“I think calling her daily will be a huge emotional boost for her,” Cat murmured, smiling a little. She couldn’t keep her hands off Talon. Just simply moving her fingers across his shoulder sent heated signals to her lower body. Wanting. Just him. Just Talon. Cat removed her hand. There was so much uncharted emotional territory with this man and she couldn’t trust herself.
“I can at least do that,” Talon agreed, his voice gravelly. His flesh was tingling, heat radiating from where her fingertips had rested. Did Cat know her power over him? That she gently held his heart between her work-worn hands? That any contact with her made him grow hard? The innocence in her expression stunned him. She was old enough to understand a woman’s ability to inflame a man. Talon wanted to know everything about Cat. His finely honed sixth sense told him her innocence was real, that she wasn’t worldly.
Something…God, he knew something terrible or traumatic had happened to Cat to make her this way. And his sexual response to her was like that of a hungry wolf. She’d saved his life, brought him back from the brink of death. She sure as hell deserved a hell
uva lot more than him stalking her like a selfish bastard. Talon moved his hands slowly up and down his thighs, scowling. Unhappy with himself.
“I need to check your lungs and get your temperature,” Cat told him, forcing herself to move. A chance to touch him again, but this time, it really was about checking Talon’s temperature and making sure he stayed on the road to recovery. “Can you lie down?”
“Yeah,” Talon grunted, easing Zeke from between his legs and then lying down on the bed. He watched Cat through half-closed eyes. When she looped the stethoscope around her neck, he couldn’t help saying, “Whoever the guy is in your life, he’s one lucky bastard.”
Cat’s eyebrows moved up and she froze for a moment. She stared at Talon on the bed. He was a big man and his hands were tucked behind his head, his expression curious. She managed a short laugh. “There’s no one in my life.” She reached down into her bag and retrieved the handheld Braun ThermoScan thermometer.
“Why?” Talon cursed himself for his bluntness. Pain flashed across Cat’s face as she sat down on the bed.
“I have bad luck with men in general,” she admitted. Opening his shirt and folding it open, she listened to his lungs.
Talon stared up at her. Cat had problems with men? He watched her closely as she listened intently through her stethoscope. When she was finished, he asked, “So, you’re not seeing anyone presently?”
She picked up the ThermoScan and eased it into his ear. “That’s right.” Shame flowed through Cat. Her latest bad choice involved Beau Magee, a truck driver with Ace Trucking. As she removed the thermometer, she murmured, “Good, your temp is ninety-nine degrees.” She smiled down into his troubled-looking eyes. “That antibiotic is really taking hold.”
“And my lungs? How do they sound?” He absorbed her every move, her every expression. That smile of hers was like sunlight piercing the heavy darkness of his mangled heart and broken soul.
“Improving. Still crackling sounds, but less so.” She patted his hand. “You’re really going to have to rest for two weeks, Talon. If you overdo it, you’ll relapse.”
“I’m not the type to sit around.”
“Yeah,” Cat said, and chuckled, getting up and walking to her medical bag. “I got that. You’re a man of action.”
“Being a SEAL, you’re on the move all the time. I get antsy if I have to stay anywhere for more than fifteen minutes.”
As she leaned down to put her equipment away, he truly appreciated her rear, those generous hips. It was too bad she didn’t wear clothes that fit her a little better. Everything Cat wore hung on her, as if she were hiding her body within the folds of the fabric. She should be proud of it, showing it off.
Straightening, Cat turned and grinned at him. “Well, you’d best give yourself a talking-to about that, because as bad a case of pneumonia as you have, enforced rest is mandatory.”
“So, do you play any card games?” he teased. Talon liked the way her mouth curved upward.
“No, but I like Scrabble. I’m always trying to improve my vocabulary.” Because in grade school she nearly flunked out of reading. But then with her father stalking her, abusing her, Cat’s mind wasn’t really focused on learning the alphabet, phonetics or reading. She was focused on surviving. “Actually, your mom got me into it. I would read to her and stumble over words I couldn’t pronounce, so we played Scrabble.”
Warmth filled Talon’s heart. His mother was a good and kind person. “Okay, Scrabble. You can teach me how to play it. Otherwise, I’ll go crazy if I have to stay in a room for two weeks. Maybe I could move around outside a little.” Talon touched Zeke’s head. “And my dog absolutely needs to get outside, play and run around.”
“Like his master?” Cat teased. “When I’m here at the ranch, I’ll make sure to drop by for a game of Scrabble. Right now, Griff is starting spring cleanup and getting all the leather, saddles and mechanical equipment up and running again. Once this snow clears, he’s going to have me out mending a lot of fence that has been destroyed by the winter.”
“And as soon as I can, I’ll be helping Griff and you.”
She smiled. “Gus told me they hired you as a full-time wrangler. That’s wonderful. I’m really happy for you, Talon.”
Talon was happy about a lot of things. Mostly, happy that he’d see Cat at least a few times a week. Precious time. Food for his heart, his body and soul, but he said nothing. “Listen, I’m not going to make it out to the dinner table tonight.”
Cat nodded and walked toward the door. “No worries, Gus will understand. Do you feel like eating some solid food, though? Gus made rump roast, boiled new red potatoes, steamed broccoli with cheese sauce and a rhubarb pie for dessert. Interested?”
He didn’t want her to leave just yet. “Maybe a little of everything.” Powerful emotions raced through him as she brightened. Her cheeks flushed. Cat cared about him. He could see it. But she might just see him as another patient—and not as a man. There was always a gold glint in the depths of her blue eyes when she was close to him, touching him. As if she enjoyed the contact as much as he did.
“Okay,” Cat called over her shoulder, opening the door. “I’ll bring in a tray at six.”
CHAPTER SIX
“TELL ME ABOUT yourself.” Talon sat on the edge of his bed, Zeke nearby. He picked up his knife and fork to cut into the roast. The food smelled heavenly and his stomach growled.
Cat sat in the chair, a tray across her lap. She didn’t want Talon eating alone at dinnertime. It had been Gus who suggested she keep him company. Of course, she couldn’t argue.
“Not much to tell,” she murmured. Zeke thumped his tail as Talon gave him a piece of cooled meat. The smile that came to Talon’s face made her melt. He looked so different from the hard, focused man she had seen before. When he lifted his chin, those gray eyes focused on her, Cat felt that pull, that euphoria. It was as if she were wrapped in light, held, loved. Loved? Cat slowly set her flatware on her tray, confused by her senses.
“Where were you born?” Talon saw her cheeks flush and she avoided direct eye contact. Why?
Zeke whined.
Talon pulled his gaze off Cat and patted the dog’s head.
“I was born near Cheyenne, Wyoming,” she said simply.
Talon sampled the beef, closing his eyes and savoring the hot, delicious food. It had been two months of walking from San Diego to Wyoming, on foot with Zeke, to reach home. He hadn’t eaten well but had made sure Zeke was properly fed. The meal on his lap was a banquet. A feast of unimaginable proportions. And it all smelled so good.
“What did your parents do?” he asked casually, hoping to defuse the wariness in her eyes.
Cat frowned and pushed her food around on the plate. From the quiet way Talon asked the question, she could tell he cared. But it was like stirring up a toxic waste dump from her past, the last place she wanted to go. She’d spent the past ten years of her life distancing herself from it, from him, her father. She never wanted to go back to that time. Now Talon was forcing her to and she was resistant.
“My father worked as a wrangler on a ranch,” she mumbled.
“Your mom?”
“She died when I was ten.” She glanced up and gave him a sympathetic look. “Breast cancer.”
Talon scowled. “I’m sorry.” He could see the tension on her face. “Listen, if I’m being too nosy just tell me to back off.” Because he had no desire to bring pain to Cat. God knew he carried enough in him.
Cat shrugged. “My childhood wasn’t pretty and I don’t like talking about it.”
Okay…well, that answered some of his questions. “How did you get interested in being a firefighter and paramedic?” he asked instead. Maybe that was safer ground for Cat. Some of the fear left her eyes. She started eating again.
“I always wanted to be one since I could remember. I went to college in Cheyenne and took Fire Science.” She didn’t want to tell him how much she struggled with reading. Or the nights spent with a teacher who he
lped her catch up. “When I graduated, I came here, to Jackson Hole, and got a job.”
Talon nodded, enjoying her as she relaxed. “Are there any other women on the fire department?”
“I’m the only one.”
“You picked a tough career.”
“No man is going to tell me what I can or can’t do in my life.”
Talon heard the steel grit behind her words. She was frowning, paying attention to eating, not looking up at him. Yeah, he’d sensed a toughness in her, like Kevlar plate armor. It wasn’t that obvious, because he’d been privy to her paramedic side, the healer—not the firefighter. “I imagine some of the men didn’t want you in their ranks, thought you couldn’t perform the physical work.”
“That’s for sure,” Cat said. “Lieutenant Matt Sinclaire, though, gave me a chance. Half the department didn’t want me. The other half was okay with it. I’d taken all the physical tests and passed them with flying colors.” Cat smiled a little and held Talon’s interested gaze. “I’m not exactly petite, as you can see. I’m five foot ten inches tall and strong. I can pull a two-and-a-half inch hose filled with water just as well as any man. I’m not even the smallest firefighter, either. Steve, who is twenty-seven and near my age, is a few inches shorter and definitely weighs less.”
“I’ll bet you two are best friends?”
She caught the amusement in Talon’s eyes. “Yes. From the get-go we were tight. Maybe misery loves company, although the guys at the fire department never made it tough on Steve like they did to me.”
“But you had paramedic skills. That must have helped convince them.”
“It did. But it was Matt who stood by me. He fought for me and, fortunately, I was good at my job.”
“And how many years ago was that?”
“Seven,” Cat said, feeling the tension dissolve. She didn’t mind talking about her life from eighteen years old onward.
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