by AGNES IRENE
“Fired Mason? Why would I do that? No. I’ve made him a partner.”
She covered her mouth, and her eyes crinkled with happiness, then began to fill with tears.
“And I’m giving you a well-deserved raise, starting with this bonus,” he said, pressing the envelope into her hand.
She stared at the envelope, opened it, and gasped. She tried twice to speak, pulled a hankie from her sleeve and dabbed at her eyes, and then, like Mason, left the room to compose herself.
The others stared in disbelief at what they were witnessing.
Drooms saw their expressions and came out. “This isn’t going as planned. This isn’t what I had in mind. Wait. Just a moment.” He stepped outside the office and gestured Mason and Mrs. Murphy back in. “I’m going to need your help with this.”
He addressed all of them, with Mason and Mrs. Murphy standing on either side of him. “Now, gather round, please. The changes I was referring to are good changes. We’re a good team and we’re going to be even better,” he said, placing an arm around Mason, “with Mason here as partner. The firm will henceforth be called Drooms and Mason.”
After a moment of astonishment, they broke into a round of happy congratulations. Drooms shook their hands as he handed out envelopes. “Here are your Christmas bonuses. I couldn’t be more pleased with you. Now, you should all be home with your families. Go. We’re finished here.”
Amid wishes of “Merry Christmas!” “Thank you, sir!” and “God bless you!” they excitedly gathered their coats and hats.
Drooms called out to them as they left, “And don’t come back until the new year!”
As Mason prepared to leave, Drooms walked over to him and patted him on the back. “Give my regards to your wife, your family, Mason. By the way, how are the twins? They must be nearly five now.”
Mason smiled. “Almost ten. Doing very well. Thank you, sir. Merry Christmas.”
Drooms left the office, and enjoyed the bustle as he walked along Fifth Avenue. So many happy people everywhere. When he passed the Salvation Army bell ringer, he took out his wallet, folded some bills, and dropped them in the bucket. He tipped his hat to the carolers on the corner and wished them a Merry Christmas. He looked up at the sunny blue sky, at the snow piled along the sidewalk, and rubbed his hands together as if for warmth, but in truth, in excitement. Life, he thought, is richer, deeper, when there is love in your heart.
He made his way over to a side street and searched for a store he had passed not long ago. There it was, an art supply store. Its windows were decked with pine garlands and colored lights, reminding him of the night he and Lillian had set up her tree. He gazed at the display of beautiful wooden boxes full of assorted paints, pencils, and crayons. Fifteen minutes later, Drooms left the store carrying a large flat box tied in red ribbon. He made his way home in a hurry, all the while telling himself, It can’t be too late. I won’t let it be.
Lillian and the boys returned late in the afternoon. As they mounted the stairs, Lillian saw that the drawing outside Drooms’s door was gone. It was as if another version of herself had placed it there, in the overwrought emotional spikes of the night. She would give it no more thought. He was a closed man, whatever his reasons. And just as well. She was better off alone.
The boys had two little bags of oranges and hard Christmas candy. Gabriel started to go towards Drooms’s apartment. “I want to give Mr. Drooms some candy.”
“Yeah, let’s show Mr. Drooms what we got,” said Tommy.
“No, come inside, boys. You can hang the candy canes on the tree. Come, help me get dinner ready.” She ushered them inside and turned on the lamps. The boys placed their things on the coffee table, stepped out of their stiff shoes, and peeled off their coats. “Get out of your good clothes.” As they ran into their bedroom, she called after them. “And put them away nicely!”
When the phone rang, her pulse quickened and blood rushed to her face. She frowned that her heart had not kept pace with her mind’s decision, was lagging far behind. But it was Izzy on the line, asking if Lillian could run downstairs for just a moment. She and Red were on their way and wanted to stop by to wish her a Merry Christmas.
After she hung up, Lillian set out a fruit cake for Izzy, and a tin of cookies for Red. She gazed out the kitchen window at the fading day. Across the way, golden light poured from the windows of the apartments, spilling onto the snow-filled ledges. A few windows revealed Christmas trees, some already lit for the evening. On the sidewalk below, a group of children were putting the finishing touches on a snowman, adding a carrot nose and stick arms. People were coming and going from the apartments; a mother stood in a doorway, calling her children in from play.
Lillian began to prepare dinner. She put a crocheted tablecloth over the table, and in the center placed the sugar-dusted gingerbread with a sprig of holly on top. She then turned on the oven and put in a casserole she had made the day before. As she took out some vegetables and began to wash them, she mentally made sure she had everything for Christmas dinner the next day.
The boys emerged in their day clothes. Gabriel ran to the kitchen and impulsively gave her a hug. “I love you, Mommy!”
Tommy also hugged her. “Me too, Mommy!”
Lillian’s hands were full with wet carrots, but she embraced them both. “My boys!”
Tommy picked up the box of candy canes from the table. “Can we hang them?”
“Yes,” said Lillian. “And let’s have some Christmas music.”
Tommy turned on the radio, and dramatically mimicked the crooning. Gabriel joined him and they tumbled onto the couch laughing. They opened the box of candy canes and began hanging them on the tree.
A few minutes later a horn tooted twice. Lillian went to the window and saw Izzy and Red standing next to a cab. She waved at them and motioned that she would come down.
“I’ll be right back, boys.” She put on her sweater and took the fruit cake and tin of cookies.
When Lillian saw Izzy and Red, she was struck by how happy they seemed. She handed Red the tin, and the fruitcake to Izzy.
“Your famous fruitcake?” asked Izzy.
Lillian nodded. “My mother’s recipe.”
Izzy elbowed Red. “It’s loaded with brandy – delicious!” She turned to Lillian. “Thanks, Lilly. We’ll have it tomorrow. Red is having Christmas with me.”
Red reached into the taxi and handed a bottle with a ribbon around it to Lillian, and two long flat giftwrapped boxes. “Merry Christmas!”
“Games for the boys – from me and Red,” Izzy said, as she linked her arm with Red.
“You didn’t have to,” said Lillian, “but thank you. The boys will be so pleased.” She looked at the presents and imagined them under the tree. They would help to fill in the gaps. “They’re opening their presents tonight. Thank you, Red. Thanks, Izzy.”
Lillian looked from Izzy to Red who kept exchanging glances, and squeezing each other’s hand.
Red finally nudged Izzy and laughed. “Go ahead. Tell her!”
Izzy took off her glove and held up her hand, displaying a ring.
Lillian gasped at the news. “Engaged?”
“Red leaves end of next month. We’re getting married before he goes.”
Red threw his arm around Izzy and kissed her cheek. “I’m the luckiest fellow in the world!” He lifted her for a second in sheer exuberance and kissed her again, then gave Lillian a kiss on the cheek.
Lillian laughed at the joy they couldn’t contain. “That’s wonderful news! I’m so happy for you both.” She took Izzy’s hand and admired the ring. “It’s beautiful.” Her voice quivered as she spoke and she felt tears in her eyes. She tried to laugh her emotions away, but by then Izzy was also starting to cry.
Red took over. “No time for that. This is supposed to be a happy day.”
Izzy laughed and dabbed at her eyes and gave Lillian a quick hug. “Well, we gotta run. We’re making the rounds. Merry Christmas, Lilly!”
&nbs
p; “Merry Christmas! Take good care of yourself, Red.”
Lillian waved goodbye to them as they climbed into the taxi. She laughed when Red planted a big exaggerated kiss on Izzy’s cheek as they drove off.
Lillian watched the red tail lights disappear around the corner with the happy couple inside. She held her sweater close. Dusk had now settled on the sidewalk, on the row of brownstones. Everyone was inside their homes, having their dinners or preparing for the holiday. She looked down the street, empty and quiet now. Mounds of snow lay on the edge of the sidewalk and in between the cars. Some cars had never been dug out, and remained white mounds with black showing through where the kids had knocked off the snow. She gazed up at the dark sky and slowly walked back inside.
While Lillian was downstairs, there was a knock at the door. Gabriel was at the window where he saw Lillian take the gift from Red. Now he raced Tommy to the door and shrieked with delight to see Drooms standing there with presents stacked in his arms.
“Hi, Mr. Drooms!” His eyes opened wide.
“Wow! Presents!” said Tommy.
Gabriel gave him a big hug. “I knew you would come! Are these for us?”
Drooms laughed as he handed them the presents. “Of course they’re for you.” The boys ran to put them under the tree. Drooms looked around for Lillian. “Is your mother here?”
“She’s downstairs kissing that man who gave her a present,” Gabriel said.
Drooms stood staring, as if he didn’t quite understand. Then his smile slowly drooped and settled into a line. What had he been thinking? Why had he been so hopeful, so happy? There must be some mistake. He bunched his eyebrows together, and focused on the floor, as if searching for something.
“Don’t be a dope, Gabe. She won’t be long, Mr. Drooms. Come on in.”
Drooms started to leave. The last thing he wanted to see was Lillian with someone else. “No, no, I just wanted to say Merry Christmas. I have to go. I’ll see you later, boys.”
Tommy stood looking after him, disappointed.
Drooms quickly closed the door. He stood a moment in the hallway, and then leaned his head against her door. The sense of loss overwhelmed him. Her smile, her walk, her voice, had already become a part of him.
He felt his heart beating at the words that were forming in his mind. “I love her,” he whispered out loud.
But then she was so loveable, of course others must feel the same way. How could they not? He ran several scenarios through his mind, thinking Gabriel must be mistaken. But neither boy had seemed surprised by her actions. Perhaps she had someone all along. Perhaps there was something between her and Rockwell. And why shouldn’t she have someone, someone who would treat her well and–
He turned quickly and saw Lillian coming up the last flight of stairs, holding presents in her arms. He scowled and looked behind her for someone else, listened for another set of footsteps.
Lillian was surprised to see him standing outside her door. She glanced behind her to see who he was looking for, and then back to Drooms.
“Isn’t your friend coming?” he asked.
Lillian stopped, perplexed. “No. Why?”
“The boys said you were downstairs kissing a man.” There. He had thrown down the gauntlet. He didn’t care if he sounded petty or jealous. He had to know what was going on.
A slow smile spread across Lillian’s face, and she felt herself grow warm as a jolt of life coursed through her. She didn’t want him to see that she was blushing, so she kept her head down as she climbed the last few steps. She could almost laugh out loud at the thoughts that ran through her mind. Did he really think she had someone else? Was that jealousy in his voice? In a flash she knew that nothing had changed between them. A little scar tissue that would fade with time, nothing more.
She stood before him. Behind her fears, and trying to convince herself that she wanted to be alone, she knew it was too late. There was the man she loved. Difficult, contrary, wounded – there he was with that look in his eyes, so much passion and vulnerability locked inside him. She couldn’t prolong his anguish any longer.
“My friend, Izzy, and her beau. We exchanged gifts.”
Drooms slowly closed his eyes and felt like an absolute fool. But when he opened them, he saw love in her eyes.
Lillian held his gaze, controlled his gaze, as she waited for him to explain his behavior. She had made up her mind about him, and loved him as he was, but wanted to be equally sure of his feelings for her.
Drooms placed a hand on her shoulder. “Lillian. I’m so sorry for yesterday, for what I said. You know I didn’t mean it.” When she didn’t say anything, he took her hand. “Please tell me I’m not too late.”
He lifted her face and searched her eyes for an answer. Though she wanted to throw her arms around him, she forced herself to remain still, and to speak calmly. “I don’t think you’re sure about how you feel.”
“I’ve never been more sure about anything. Please give me the chance to show you.” He took both her hands. “I – I want to explain something to you. I want you to know why…why I – why I overreacted when I thought Gabriel was hurt.” He bent his head down and found that he didn’t know how to start, where to start. He swallowed hard. “I …, I – When I was–”
Lillian placed a hand on his arm. “That’s all right, Charles.” She couldn’t bear to see him struggling with his pain. “You don’t have to tell me now.”
The tenderness in her voice as she said his name, the light touch on his arm, acted as balm to him. He put his hand to her soft cheek and knew that everything would be all right.
Just then the door flung open and Tommy poked his head into the hall. “Mom! Look what Mr. Drooms brought.”
Gabriel ran up next to him. “Mommy, he brought presents! They’re under the tree!”
Lillian smiled and took Drooms by the hand. “Well, let’s take a look! Come in, Charles.” He followed her in, never taking his eyes off her.
The boys ran to the tree and held up the presents, talking and stumbling over each other in their excitement. Tommy held up the large box tied with red ribbon and read the tag. “Hey, this one is for you, Mom!” The boys whooped as they shook presents and arranged them under the tree.
Lillian reached to kiss Drooms on the cheek. “You’ll join us for dinner?”
Drooms nodded and ran his hand over her hair and rested it gently on her shoulder.
Lillian smiled at their unspoken pact. “Boys, show Mr. Drooms the tree while I finish getting dinner ready.”
The boys pulled Drooms over to the tree. Gabriel handed him the box of candy canes.
“Here, Mr. Drooms, you can hang the high ones. And I’ll hang the low ones. Oops.” He began to eat the candy cane he just broke, and offered some to Drooms and Tommy.
Lillian cast frequent glances at Drooms, just as he watched her moving about the kitchen.
They both started when they heard Tommy’s panicked voice. “Oh, no! Mom!”
A worried look crossed her face. “Now what?”
“We forgot to get a star!”
Now Gabriel became equally worried. “We have to have something at the top, Mommy. Otherwise it won’t really be finished.”
Lillian stood with the silverware in her hands. “I completely forgot.”
Both boys were alarmed at not having a completed tree. Gabriel looked from Tommy to his mom to Drooms, waiting for someone to solve the problem. He then hit on an idea. “Can we borrow your star, Mr. Drooms?”
Drooms was about to explain that he didn’t have any decorations, then suddenly he remembered the boxes of old family things his sister Kate had sent years ago. He had completely forgotten about them. He was sure there were some Christmas decorations in them.
“Boys, Mr. Drooms doesn’t have anything. We’ll just have to do without one this year.”
“I can’t say for sure,” said Drooms, “but I think I might have something – packed away.”
Lillian stood in amazement. “Rea
lly?”
“I think so.” He turned to the boys. “Shall we go and see if I’m right? We might have to dig through a few boxes.”
Tommy raised his eyebrows. “Can we Mom?” Gabriel had already run to the door and was jumping up and down.
“Yes. Go and help Mr. Drooms,” said Lillian.
The boys ran ahead. “Hurry, Mr. Drooms!”
He laughed at their excitement, and hoped he was correct in his recollection. It was so long since he had thought about those boxes.
He opened the door to his apartment and went to the inner room. The boys looked up at him as he hesitated a moment, his hand on the doorknob. Then he opened it and switched on the light. It was just a dark closet full of old stuff that needed cleaning out. Nothing more. He shifted the old files and dusty boxes on the shelves and lifted a box from the top shelf.
“It’s somewhere in here. In one of these large boxes, I think. Here, Tommy. You start on this one.” He set down a box outside the room for Tommy to search through, and then took down another box, and he and Gabriel began rummaging through it.
Gabriel identified the items he pulled out. “Letters. Photos. Papers....”
Tommy soon cried out in surprise. “Hey! Look! I think I found it!” He pulled out a beautiful, intricate silver star. “Wait till Mom sees this!” He ran off, yelling, “Mom! I found it!”
In the same box where Tommy found the star, Drooms noticed a box of old glass ornaments. He recognized them all – St. Nicholas holding a tree, the little houses and churches, the shiny trumpets and glittering drums. He carefully lifted the box and brought it to Gabriel.
Just inside the inner room, Gabriel was looking at a tiny old photograph of a mischievous looking boy who was smiling, with a scarf around his neck. “Hey,” said Gabriel. “Who’s this?”
Drooms took the photograph and brushed off the dust. He smiled as he beheld the tiny photo. “That’s me,” he said softly. “When I was a boy.”
Gabriel saw the box of ornaments and gasped when he spotted a red Santa holding a green Christmas tree. “I can’t believe it! Just like my ornament. Can I show Mommy?”
