by Abby Weeks
She walked on for an hour or more. She knew if she stopped she wouldn’t be able to keep going. The gravel cut into the soft soles of her feet and even though she didn’t stop to look at them, she knew they were bleeding.
After two hours of walking, Janey realized she might not make it all the way back to Troy. She still had miles to go and her feet were raw and bleeding. Dawn was hours away and the temperature had dropped painfully close to freezing. She began to regret throwing away her shoes but they were so impractical that it hardly made a difference. What she was really afraid of was the cold. She’d heard of people dying out in the cold. It wasn’t truly winter yet, but by the chill in the air it was coming.
She wondered what Ben had imagined she would do. He’d abandoned her in that cursed parking lot without a second thought to her safety. Did he want her to die out there, exposed to the chill night air with hardly any clothes on? Did he want her to get picked up by a group of strange men who would harm her? She didn’t know anymore. There weren’t even any houses she could turn to for help. She didn’t have any money or cell phone. She had no way of calling the police, or even a cab.
She looked at her watch and was startled to see that it was almost midnight! How long had she been walking? She no longer knew. It had been hours. She was approaching an intersection and with a flash of recognition realized it was the turnoff to Suzy and Luke’s house. She stared at the intersection sign for a good five minutes as she walked toward it and when she finally reached it she knew what she had to do. She’d been left with no choice. She didn’t think she’d make it all the way back to the city if she continued walking. She had no way of contacting anyone for help. A car sped by and she half-heartedly held out her hand for assistance but it didn’t even slow down. No one was going to pick her up along this stretch of road in the middle of the night. She wasn’t even sure she wanted to be picked up.
Her entire body was shivering and her feet couldn’t take much more of this abuse. With a feeling of anguish she turned to the right and began to make her way slowly down the rutted driveway that led to Suzy and Luke’s house. She didn’t even know what she would do when she reached the end. She didn’t know if anyone was at the house. She didn’t know if they would be surprised to see her or not. All she knew was that she couldn’t go on walking along the side of that dark road.
II
WHEN THE FRONT DOOR OPENED, Janey didn’t know whose face she was hoping to see. Of the three people she thought might be inside, Luke was the only one who’d ever shown her even the slightest bit of kindness lately. Ben had been getting progressively meaner and nastier toward her and Suzy seemed to hate her with a passion.
She was a little relieved then, when she saw Luke come to the door.
—Janey! he said, obviously surprised to see her.
—Luke. I had no where else to go.
—Jesus Christ, Janey. You’re the last person I expected to see here. Didn’t you learn your lesson back at the parking lot?
—What do you mean? I couldn’t make it all the way back to town on my own.
—You should’t have come her.
—Please, Luke. Just give me a ride to the city. I’ll get help there.
—You have to leave, right now.
Luke began to close the door on her but then they heard Suzy’s voice from somewhere inside the house.
—Honey, who is it?
Janey noticed that there was music playing inside. Suzy’s voice sounded a little slurred, as if she’d been drinking.
—It’s no one, honey, Luke said. Then to Janey, —If they find you, you’re going to regret it.
—But where else can I go?
She showed Luke her bloodied feet. They were filthy. She’d been walking for hours and the highway really had taken a tole.
—Get out of here, for your own good, Luke said.
He shut the door. Janey stood in front of it, stunned. She didn’t know what to do. She heard voices inside the house but knew she was unlikely to get help from whoever else was in the house. Luke had been her only chance. Ben and Suzy weren’t her friends and weren’t going to help her. She’d been half thinking they’d wanted her to show up here, that they’d expected her to. Where else was there for her to go? But now she saw that they wanted nothing to do with her.
She looked around at the driveway. Ben’s car was there! The idea flashed across her mind in a sudden moment of inspiration. All she had to do was check if his keys were in it. They often were. She could take his car and drive herself home. She was about to cross the driveway to the car when the front door opened again. This time it wasn’t Luke. It was Suzy.
Suzy’s voice hit Janey’s already raw nerves like a sledge hammer on brittle ice.
—Well, well. What have we got here?
It was only then, when she heard the cruel taint to Suzy’s voice, that Janey realized her mistake. She should never have come back here. It was the last place on earth she was going to find help. These were the people who’d abused her at the parking lot and then abandoned her. They weren’t going to offer her help.
In a panicked moment she made a desperate decision. She decided to make a dash for Ben’s car. When her feet hit the ground, pain shot through her. She managed to ignore it. She had to get to that car. She could hear footsteps on the porch behind her but she didn’t dare look back. Her feet burned in pain with every desperate step. She fled toward the car as if her life depended on it. Maybe it did. Just as she reached it, reached the clasp of the door, she felt someone grab her firmly by the hair.
She cried out. She couldn’t get the door opened. Whoever had her hair yanked her head back. She fell backward onto the ground. She looked up and saw Suzy’s face looking down at her. It was probably the last face in the world she wanted to see. There seemed to be nothing but wrath and hatred in her eyes.
—You’re not going anywhere, bitch, Suzy said.
Janey looked toward the house. Luke and Ben were approaching. What had she gotten herself into? She’d been so stupid to come back here. It was insane. Ben and Luke took her by the arms and lifted her from the ground. They literally dragged her, her feet trailing, back to the house. She had a sinking feeling in her stomach that she had just made a fateful mistake. She’d come here looking for help. How stupid! A fear spread across her mind like a dark nightmare. If she ever left this house again, she’d be lucky.
The men brought her through a hall into a large living room. There was a fire in a hearth giving out heat and light. A few lamps spread around the room gave off the rest of the light. The furniture was dated but comfortable. There was a sofa, a few arm chairs and a wooden table. Three wine glasses and a half-empty bottle of Merlot sat on the table. Above the fire was an old painting. It was of an English hunt, men on horses with a group of hounds in front of them making their way across a pastoral landscape. The house was built of thick logs and the wood grain went well with the decor. Under different circumstances, Janey would have thought the place cozy.
Suzy led the way and sat in the middle of the sofa. Ben and Luke set Janey down on an armchair directly in front of Suzy. They joined Suzy on the sofa, one on each side of her. The men were still wearing the same clothes they’d been in earlier but Suzy had changed into a beautiful, white silk negligee.
Janey wondered what was going to happen now. She’d come back here by choice and realized she only had her own stupidity to blame for it. Across from her, Suzy and the two men stared at her as if she was the most unexpected guest they’d ever seen. It was Suzy who broke the silence.
—Look at those disgusting feet! she said.
Janey looked down at her feet. It was the first opportunity she’d had to inspect them in the light. They weren’t quite as bad as she’d feared. They were covered in mud and hurt terribly but apart from a few nicks and small cuts they would be ok.
—We’ll have to get them washed immediately, Suzy said. I don’t want this filthy slut muddying up my clean house.
—I’ll
get the collar, Ben said.
He got up and returned with a collar similar to the one Janey had worn the night before. It was of brown leather this time, rather than black. Janey looked into Ben’s face, trying to make eye contact as he fastened the collar around her neck. He wouldn’t even look at her. He just attached the collar, not too tightly, but Janey saw that it would be difficult to take it off without assistance. When it was fastened, Ben handed the leash to Suzy and took his seat next to her.
—Thank you, Suzy said. Now if you two gentlemen will excuse me for a few minutes, I’ll get this bitch cleaned up for you. Right now, she’s a disgrace.
Suzy got up and tugged meanly on the leash, jerking Janey’s head forward. Janey got up and followed closely as Suzy led her back out to the hall and up a large staircase to the second floor.
When they reached the top, Suzy gave the collar another yank and Janey hurried to keep up with her. She was led into the bathroom which was old fashioned but functional, with a cast iron tub and net curtains over a small window.
—Get in the tub, Suzy said.
Janey did as she was told and climbed into the tub. She still had her dress on, and a bra, but no shoes and no panties. When Suzy turned on the water Janey backed away from it. It was ice cold and she had already caught a bad chill from being outside. Suzy flicked a little knob on the faucet and the cold water started spraying out of the shower attachment. Without a word of warning, Suzy poured the cold water over Janey. In a second her dress was soaked through. Janey tried to get away from the water but Suzy simply tugged on the leash and Janey was back in position.
—Wash yourself, slut, Suzy said.
Janey began to carefully wash the dirt and mud off her sore feet, cleaning the little stones and pieces of dirt out of the cuts. Within a few minutes her feet looked clean and a lot better than they had. Janey didn’t think they would give her any more trouble. They weren’t bleeding and she’d cleaned all the cuts thoroughly.
Then Suzy began pouring the icy water over her head.
—Now wash the rest of your body, she said. You’re a filthy slut.
Janey got out of the soaking dress and threw it to the side. Then she slipped out of her bra. She was completely naked and the cold water poured over her. The iciness of it was shocking. She scrubbed her body and face clean.
—Get up, Suzy said.
Janey stood in the tub. She had to hold on to the side to stop herself losing balance.
—Turn around and bend over.
She turned and bent down and held the side of the tub. She gasped as she felt the jet of cold water flow into her vagina. She quivered from the shock of the powerful jet of water.
—You need it, Suzy said. You’re a disgusting whore.
Janey knew that if she heard that sort of talk enough, she would start to believe it. She’d gone through so much trauma in her childhood and this sort of treatment brought it all back to the surface. She knew, deep down, that that was the reason she’d allowed all of the humiliating things Ben had done to her to happen. She knew too that it was the reason she was here now. She’d come for more humiliation. It was like a compulsion. The way Ben and Suzy had treated her in the parking lot opened up a wound deep within her and she needed to experience humiliation now.
—Hold your ass open, Suzy said.
Janey obeyed and held her butt cheeks open so that Suzy could spray the water right on her anus.
—Ok, now you’re getting cleaner, she said.
She watched as Suzy turned down the cold water pressure and added some hot water to the mix. She tested the temperature with her hand the way someone would for a child, and then began pouring it over Janey’s hair.
—Lean your head back, she said.
Janey leaned back and allowed Suzy to pour shampoo onto her head. She lathered it into her hair while Suzy poured the water over her head. They repeated the process with conditioner.
—Much better, Suzy said.
As Janey stood in the bathtub, drying herself with a towel, she had to admit that she did feel better. She felt a hundred times better than she had when she’d arrived. She couldn’t believe that it had been less than twelve hours since she’d left the hospital. She’d been through an entire life time’s worth of suffering in that time. It was also less than twelve hours since she’d seen Henry. She knew that if he found out how she was being treated, he’d step in to protect her. She had so much faith in him, so much trust, and she took comfort from the thought of him. If only he knew where to find her. He’d come if he knew. She had to believe that. She barely knew him but managed to give herself some small amount of comfort by telling herself that he cared about her.
—Follow me, Suzy said when Janey had dried off.
Janey followed her into a bedroom. There was a large, wooden-framed bed in the middle of a fairly sparse room. Suzy indicated for Janey to sit on the bed and she did so. Then Suzy gave her a bottle of body lotion. Janey poured some lotion onto her hand and began moisturizing her arms and legs.
—Good, Suzy said. Now lie down.
Janey lay on her back and let Suzy rub the lotion all over her body. She started on her chest, rubbing the lotion onto her breasts, her neck and stomach and upper arms. Then she rubbed it onto her vagina, creating a soothing sensation that almost felt good. If it weren’t for the fear, the fact that her nerves were completely on edge, Janey would have enjoyed the massage. Suzy turned her around and repeated the process, rubbing lotion onto her back, the backs of her legs, her bum cheeks and even into the crack between the cheeks.
—You’ve got to take care of yourself if you’re going to be presentable, Suzy said.
—Presentable for what? Janey asked.
Suzy didn’t answer. She put away the lotion and took out a white, silk negligee, identical to the one she was wearing herself.
—Put this on, Suzy said.
Suzy unfastened the leash that was still attached to the collar on Janey’s neck and when the negligee was on, she reattached it. Now she looked the same as Suzy, apart from the collar.
Suzy looked her over. She took out a comb and quickly brushed Janey’s hair with it.
—Good, she said. You look a lot better.
—What’s going on? Janey said.
—Never you mind, Suzy said. You’ll find out soon enough.
She tied the leash to a bedpost so that Janey couldn’t leave the bed, and then pulled back the covers. Janey got into the bed. She almost could have cried, she was so relieved to feel the warm blankets cover her body. After all that she had been through, going to sleep seemed like a complete luxury.
—Thank you, she said to Suzy.
Suzy gave her a thin smile and then went to the door of the bedroom.
—Luke, she called down the stairs. We’re ready.
Janey heard footsteps on the staircase. Suzy came back over to the bed and got in to it, next to Janey. Luke and Ben appeared in the doorway.
—All ready for bed? Luke said.
—Yes, Suzy answered.
Luke nodded and then turned out the light in the room. He shut the door and Janey heard it lock behind him.
She stared into the darkness and lay there, motionless, next to Suzy. What was happening to her?
No answer came.
III
JANEY HAD NO IDEA HOW long she’d been asleep. She was still in the bedroom only now it was daytime. She went to look at her watch but it was gone. Suzy must have taken it off her. She was still in the collar, attached to the bedpost. Suzy had been there during the night but now she was gone.
She got up from the bed and sat on the side of it. The sleep had done her good. It also felt good to be washed and rested. Suzy had even brushed her hair. She was grateful for all of it. She’d needed the rest more than she’d known. She wondered how long she’d been asleep but without her watch there was no way of knowing.
There was a window in the wall facing the door and Janey climbed across the bed and tried to look out of it. The curt
ains were closed but they were lace and semi-transparent. She couldn’t get up and open them because of the leash attached to the bed but she could see faintly out the window. It seemed to be about mid-afternoon. Outside, she could see the tops of trees and little else. It was an overcast day, cold with a fairly strong breeze, judging from the swaying trees. She was glad not to be outside. After the night she’d had she’d be glad not to be outside very much at all for a while.
She was still wearing the silk negligee Suzy had dressed her in and she had to admit it was quite beautiful. She got back under the blankets and closed her eyes. She didn’t open them again till she heard the door unlocking. It was darker now. A few more hours must have passed in sleep. She’d been so exhausted she’d allowed an entire day to slip by her.
The door opened and Suzy entered.
—It’s about time you woke up.
—How long was I out?
—All day.
—What time is it now?
—It’s about five thirty. Stop asking questions. I have to get you dressed.
—Dressed? For what?
—I told you to stop asking questions.
Suzy brought Janey back out to the bathroom and washed her again, giving her the same ice cold bath she’d given her the night before. Janey wondered why she couldn’t wash with hot water and almost cried in happiness when Suzy made the water hot to wash her hair. After the bath, Suzy brought her back into the bedroom and had her sit on the bed. Suzy sat next to her and spent about fifteen minutes doing Janey’s makeup. She did it differently from the way Janey usually did it. She used more blush and shadow. It was a little gaudy in Janey’s opinion, but she was in no position to complain. Suzy held up a mirror to her and she saw that she looked a lot like Suzy. They could have been sisters. It was amazing what a difference a new makeup style made. She was like a new woman. The thought flashed across her mind that maybe Ben would like her better now that she looked like Suzy. Immediately, she banished the thought. She couldn’t allow herself to think like that anymore. She had to give up on Ben. He wasn’t her husband any more. A husband was only a husband if he acted like one. He was supposed to take care of and protect his woman. As far as Janey was concerned, if Ben didn’t act like a husband, then he didn’t deserve to be thought of as one.
