Winter at West Sands Guest House

by Maggie Conway

  The money from Paul’s life insurance meant she was able to put in an offer and when it was accepted, Eva was elated and horrified all at the same time. Helen’s reaction to her daughter’s idea had been less idealistic. ‘Do you like plunging toilets and cleaning carpet stains?’ she had asked. With her mother’s caustic words ringing in her head, Eva stood in the hall that first day trying to comfort Jamie, terrified she had made a huge mistake. Overwhelmed and exhausted, Eva had a sudden desire to crawl into a warm bed and sleep for a week.

  And then out of that dark moment, Moira MacKenzie appeared at the door like a beacon of light, bringing hope – and a pot of home-made soup – to Eva. Wearing layers of bright clothes, her copper-red hair piled haphazardly on top of her head and bangles jangling at her wrists, something about her presence immediately put Eva at ease.

  She’d felt guilty for doing it, but it was impossible not to compare Moira to her own mother. Of course Eva knew her mother loved her. But it was a neatly wrapped kind of love that came with air kisses. She wasn’t the type of woman who made you want to lose yourself in a big-bosomed hug the way Moira MacKenzie did.

  Moira and her husband Donald were both retired academics and ran a second-hand bookshop in St Andrews. The two women chatted comfortably as Moira helped Eva to unpack and settle Jamie into his new room. Eva wasn’t sure if they would have made it through those first few days without her and had counted her lucky stars a thousand times over the years that the MacKenzies were her neighbours. Kind, caring, and just a tiny bit eccentric. Eva loved them. Although their own children had grown and left, their house was always full of grandchildren and friends coming and going.

  Eva’s heart sank the day Moira told her the house had been sold. A few weeks later Eva tearfully waved them off, happy for them but secretly wishing things didn’t have to change. The house had lain empty for a few weeks and it had been difficult to see it sitting silently. It was only then Eva realized just how much she had depended on the MacKenzies’ presence next door. How since they had left, a sense of loneliness seemed to have engulfed her.

  ***

  What kind of an idiot buys a house without seeing it first? An idiot like me, thought Ben Matthews knocking back a couple of painkillers with a mouthful of coffee. Leaning against the window he looked out at the view from his new front living room. In the distance he could see the swell of the dark sea. He ran his hand through his hair, realizing this was going to take some getting used to. The world felt quiet here, so different from the constant noise and buzz of the city.

  He had left London ridiculously early this morning. The journey had been long and hard; only the thought of the removal van a couple of hours behind had spurred him on. He had finally arrived in St Andrews in the early afternoon and headed straight to the solicitor’s office where he’d dealt with a barrage of legal documentation and polite questions as quickly as possible. Armed with keys and directions to his new home he drove through the town, only stopping to grab a few groceries. From what he could see, the cobbled streets and historic architecture looked charming and quaint and, more importantly, as different from London as he had hoped.

  He found the house easily enough: the last property in a row of impressive Victorian houses facing the beach. He’d climbed out of the car, rolling the tension out of his shoulders as he took in his new surroundings. The house itself sat well back from the road, the front lawn flanked by a gravelled driveway on one side and overgrown flowerbeds on the other.

  He glanced over at the neighbouring house – similar to his except for the ivy cascading down the soft red brick of its front wall and spilling over a blue front door. To the other side of the house there was nothing to see except the sweep of sand and sea stretching into the distance. After unloading the car, he’d let himself in, dumped his suitcases in the hall, and waited for the delivery van.

  By anyone’s standards it must seem mad that the day he moved into his new house was the first time he’d actually stepped into it. But he had left it all to Samantha. It had been she who had flown up to Scotland to view the house while Ben stayed to close his last big deal.

  Telling Samantha he wanted to leave London and return to teaching, he hadn’t been sure how she would react. She was a city girl through and through but she seemed to go for it, shared his vision for a new life. She appeared genuinely excited by Ben’s job offer at the University of St Andrews, providing the obligatory bottle of something expensive to celebrate.

  Ben thought they might rent somewhere first but Samantha had insisted on viewing an amazing house she’d seen online located right on the beachfront. Houses weren’t really his thing but Ben had happily looked at the photos and listened to her plans for the house, including turning one of the rooms into her office where she planned to set up and run an IT consultancy.

  Turning from the window he shook his head and smiled wryly to himself. She had been right of course. It was a beautiful house, an estate agent’s dream to sell with its original fireplaces, cornice ceilings, and large bay windows overlooking the sea. A stunning house but clearly not enough for Samantha. Not enough for her to be able to decline the promotion offered to her by the company she worked for just weeks before they were set to move. Their expansion into East Asia provided her with an opportunity simply ‘too good to turn down’.

  Ben wondered if she’d just got cold feet about them, about the whole move. She didn’t ask him to stay and he hadn’t offered to. Money wasn’t an issue and the sale of the house was in his name anyway so all he had to do was come alone. A strange almost unspoken ending of whatever it was they had. What did that say about their relationship?

  He took the last mouthful of the coffee, thankful he’d had the sense to mark a box with kitchen stuff so at least he had been able to find the kettle and cups. Apart from that, he didn’t know where anything was and wasn’t sure he’d have the energy to unpack anything tonight, let alone try and find the bedding. His stomach suddenly rumbled in protest at the measly sandwich he’d eaten earlier on the motorway and a sudden chill crept over him. It was all meant to be so different. To think he’d actually imagined the possibility of a family one day, but now the empty rooms only served to remind him how alone he was.

  He walked into the large hall where most of the boxes sat untouched. He hadn’t brought much. He’d made a decision only to bring what was important and there had been surprisingly little to pack. His books, some photos, and a few essential pieces of furniture. He had left London after all those years and realized he didn’t have much to bring at all.

  ***

  Eva decided she couldn’t wait. She simply had to go and meet her new neighbours and felt a flutter of anticipation as she slipped on her jacket and ventured out into the wet night. Earlier she’d driven Jamie and his friend Ewan to Scouts and Jamie would be dropped home later. Leaving her own front door, it took Eva only seconds to walk down the front path of her own house and up her neighbour’s.

  She remembered all the times she’d walk straight round to the back, knock on the door, and just walk in. Eva would immediately be enveloped by the warmth of the kitchen and Moira would have the kettle on before Eva had time to sit down at the massive oak table, which was always strewn with books and papers.

  Reaching the little porch Eva shook the rain from her hood, noticing the fine layer of dust on the little shelf where a potted plant used to sit. Through the opaque glass of the inner door she could see a light on in the hall. She knocked on the familiar door feeling a little bubble of excitement in her chest, thinking how lovely it would be to have neighbours again.

  After a few moments the door opened and whoever Eva might have imagined opening the door, she wasn’t prepared for the man who now did. Tall, wearing a black T-shirt and blue jeans, his dark hair was tousled, as if he’d just run a hand through it. But it was the intensity of the dark brown eyes looking at her questioningly that struck Eva and made her instantly feel self-conscious and awkward. His features were handsome but the de
ep frown etched into them made Eva feel uneasy.

  She cleared her throat and smiled brightly at him. ‘Hi. I’m Eva Harris. I live next door with my son and wanted to come and welcome you.’

  He regarded her for a moment before holding out his hand and introducing himself. ‘Ben Matthews. Nice to meet you.’

  They shook hands, his touch sending a small shockwave through Eva. Suddenly she wasn’t sure what to do. The scenario she had played out in her head of this meeting hadn’t included her standing like a speechless idiot. Granted, that was before she knew her new neighbour looked like … well, like this. But that was no reason to behave differently; she was simply here to welcome him and in keeping with the tradition set by Mrs MacKenzie, she held out a pot of her best broth.

  ‘I brought you some soup.’

  He glanced down at it, looking slightly baffled. And certainly not as grateful as Eva had hoped for.

  ‘That’s kind of you, but you didn’t have to do that.’

  She shook her head. ‘It’s no problem. I know moving day can be difficult and you might not have had time to think about food. It’s home-made, vegetable …’ Her voice trailed off and she swallowed nervously.

  ‘Thank you.’ He took the pot from her hands and placed it awkwardly on a pile of boxes behind him.

  ‘I know lots of people are vegetarian these days so I thought that would be the safest option.’ Eva heard herself babble on, wishing she could stop but sure that if she did there would be a horrible silence. Deciding she had exhausted the soup topic, she changed tack. ‘So, have you come far today?’

  ‘London.’

  She nodded. ‘St Andrews is going to be quite a change for you then.’

  ‘That’s the general idea,’ he said dryly.

  Eva couldn’t understand why he was making this so difficult and thought desperately of what to say next. She never had a problem talking to new people; she did it all the time with her guests. She had been thinking along the lines of a cosy get-to-know-you chat, possibly over a cup of tea, while she imparted her local knowledge and offered to help with anything. Well she could at least still do that.

  ‘So, um, is there anything I can help you with?’

  ‘Unless you’re a heating engineer I doubt it,’ he replied, not even bothering to hide his irritability. Now that she thought about it, there had been no surge of warmth when he had opened the door. In fact she could sense a definite chill coming from the house.

  ‘You don’t have heating?’ No wonder he was scowling. These were big houses to heat and to arrive after a long journey to find no heating would test anyone.

  ‘Have you checked the pressure gauge?’

  His brows shot up. ‘Sorry?’

  ‘Well no, I’m not a heating engineer but I’d guess the water pressure to the boiler might have dropped because it hasn’t been used for a while. You need to refill your system by opening the bypass valve.’

  Not waiting for an invitation, she walked in past him just happy she was able to help. A wall of cold air hit Eva as she entered the house and she shivered. She recalled all the times she had been here to see the MacKenzies, the house always so warm and inviting. But it was more than the cold. There was something missing but Eva couldn’t put her finger on it. A few boxes here and there but otherwise it all seemed too orderly, not enough chaos for someone who had just moved in.

  She could see he had got as far as opening the door to the small hall cupboard where the boiler was located. Using her phone torch Eva squeezed into the cupboard and knelt down. Below the boiler she found the bypass valve and opened it for a few seconds before hearing the satisfying sound of the boiler ignite.

  ‘That’s it. You should start to feel a difference soon.’ Straightening up she found herself face to face with him. Or face to chest actually – he really was tall. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, his nearness making her conscious she hadn’t given her appearance a moment’s thought before she came round. She raised her gaze to meet his and thought she detected the tiniest flicker of amusement in his eyes.

  ‘So is fixing boilers a hobby of yours?’ he asked.

  ‘I run a guest house next door. I’ve had to learn to deal with leaky taps, blocked sinks –’

  ‘Guest house?’ The frown made another appearance. As a businesswoman, Eva knew it was vital to be on good terms with her neighbours and was keen to reassure him.

  ‘Please don’t be alarmed. I only open May to September. All my guests are highly respectable, usually out all day, and tucked up nice and early so you’ll hardly know they’re here. They won’t disturb you.’

  Appearing reassured with this information he gave a small, forced smile. ‘Well, thank you. It was beginning to feel pretty miserable in here.’

  ‘These properties don’t take care of themselves. I can give you the name of a local heating engineer if you like – probably best to give the system an overhaul.’

  ‘Um, sure,’ he muttered.

  ‘So what brings you to St Andrews?’ Eva asked following him back through the hall towards the front door.

  ‘I’m starting work at the university.’

  Eva nodded, not surprised. Lots of people coming to St Andrews had some connection to the university. In the summer much of her business came from families attending graduations and Eva was happy to play a small part in these special occasions

  ‘It’s a good university and has a great reputation. My friend’s son has just started studying engineering there,’ she spoke chattily. ‘So, um, what will you be doing there?’

  He ran a hand over his shadowed jaw, hesitated for a moment as if reluctant to divulge any information. ‘Teaching physics,’ he replied simply.

  Eva had no idea what the average physicist looked like these days but was surprised. Certainly there was a serious, almost brooding quality about him but for some reason teaching physics seemed at odds with his appearance. But perhaps it explained his reticence. Maybe he was one of those genius types who found it difficult to communicate with people unless they had some super high IQ.

  Eva closed her mouth, which she realized was hanging open, and gave herself a shake. ‘Well, I’m sure you’ll enjoy living in St Andrews. It’s a friendly community and being at the university you’ll soon meet lots of people.’ Although Eva got the impression Ben Matthews wasn’t going to be actively seeking new friends.

  Meeting visitors from all over the world, Eva reckoned she had become a pretty good judge of character. Some wanted to chat; others preferred keeping to themselves. She knew some people were easy to please while others found fault in everything. And now she sensed Ben Matthews was being guarded.

  For someone who had just moved in, the place didn’t show many signs of a life on the move. Everything pointed to him being on his own, which seemed strange for such a big house. She mulled that over in her head: the fact he appeared to be single. Did it matter to her? If she was honest she’d been hoping a family might move in, maybe with children close to Jamie’s age. Perhaps he had a wife, a partner or family still to join him.

  ‘Once you get settled perhaps you and er … well perhaps you’d like to come round for dinner?’

  He had reached the front door now, placed his hand on the handle, and she saw him bristle. ‘I doubt I’ll have time. I’m going to be pretty busy.’

  ‘So, um is it just you? I mean, there’s no one else?’ She cringed inwardly at how nosy she just sounded but couldn’t help herself.

  ‘No, it’s just me,’ he replied tersely, opening the door.

  ‘Right, of course,’ Eva said weakly, stepping outside. She suddenly remembered something and turned. ‘I still have a set of keys for this house. The people who lived here before you – we had a set of each other’s keys for emergencies.’ If she hoped he might say to keep the arrangement in place – after all it was a sensible neighbourly thing to do – then she was to be disappointed.

  ‘Just put them through the letterbox next time you’re passing.’ His tone
suggested he was finding this conversation tedious now, making Eva feel as if she was being dismissed.

  ‘Of course.’

  ‘Thanks again,’ he said closing the front door behind her. Eva hurried back to her own house with the rain still falling, feeling suddenly miserable. What had she been thinking? That she could turn up and be welcomed with open arms? She was trying to be friendly but now had a horrible feeling he would just think her pushy and prying. Stupidly she thought she could re-create what she had with the MacKenzies. But of course, he was a stranger. And not a particularly friendly one by the looks of it.

  Chapter Two

  Ben hadn’t worn a suit since his last day working in the city and wasn’t enjoying wearing one now. It reminded him too much of the life he wanted to forget. Sometimes he wondered how he had endured it for five years. A job he hated but that earned him a shedload of money, a luxury apartment overlooking the Thames that he was hardly ever in, and people he socialized with but wouldn’t count as real friends.

  He’d got used to the crazy long hours, the cut and thrust of making deals. But during that time he’d never lost his passion for physics, the subject he’d studied at university. The only difference was that instead of using his mathematical skills to figure out how the universe began, he’d used them to predict how markets might react and make huge amounts of money. Well, he wasn’t living the nightmare any more – today was a new beginning.

  He fiddled with his shirt collar, feeling surprisingly nervous. He knew working at the university wouldn’t normally require him to wear a suit but he wanted to make a good impression today. A good night’s sleep would have helped but finding the bedding had proved too much and he’d finally given in to exhaustion and fallen asleep on the sofa. After only a few hours sleep he had woken early this morning, his bones aching and his mind racing.