What had been excitement to spend time alone with Callen turned into fear. It all came tumbling down at once and caused a hot flush to course through my body, and I swayed from the impact. He was a patient in a mental hospital. He’d tried to end his life. He could get very angry, and his actions were unpredictable. I wasn’t flirting with danger anymore, I was about to dance with the devil.
What in the hell was I doing?
“Hey.” He clutched my forearm as my body teetered. “You okay?”
“I….” My throat suddenly felt dry and I couldn’t get any words out.
“Noelle?” He shook me and my hazy eyes went to him. “Princess, sit.”
He lowered us onto the blanket, and my legs were thankful as they weren’t going to stay beneath me much longer. My breaths began to come in pants, and I numbly watched as Callen reached into the bag and grabbed a bottle of water.
Uncapping it, he placed it in my shaky hand. “Drink.”
I did as he instructed, and the cool water flowed down my throat. After gulping down half the bottle, I coughed and guzzled the rest. And of course, as I sat in the middle of a panic attack, my subconscious decided to take the driver’s seat.
“You are gorgeous,” I mumbled, staring at him with fuzzy eyes.
He grinned.
“So are you, baby,” he roughly whispered, and ran the back of his hand down my cheek. “You good now?”
I nodded.
“Good,” he responded, and lay down on his side, propped up by his elbow. “Now, you gonna tell me what that was all about?”
I shook my head.
He gave me a smirk, nodded, and said, “I see.”
I lowered my head and stared into my lap.
“Well, I’m gonna take a guess, okay?”
I nodded, never lifting my head.
He took a deep breath and started, “Everything hit you. Me being who I am, what we talked about last night, all that shit. Am I right?”
I lifted my head then. His soft green eyes were attentively focused on me, and I nodded. My body had turned to normal and my breathing evened out. He took my hand in his and watched the movement.
“I’d never doing anything to hurt you, Noelle.” He looked up at me. “You have to trust that.”
I nodded.
“No,” he grated out. “You’re not understanding me. I’d never fucking do anything to cause you pain or unhappiness. Some people get dealt a shitty hand in life, princess, and I’m one of them. The move I made to try and rectify that shit I was dealt was a pussy move. An easy way out instead of standing tall and fighting through it. But I can promise you, I’d never try to end my life again or hurt anyone.”
“Why are you promising me this when you should be making that promise to yourself?” I questioned in a hoarse whisper.
He squeezed my hand. “I already have. I may not say much or have told my story, but I hear everything. So, all those therapy sessions, group sessions, I listened.”
“And what did you hear?”
“That I succumbed to my weaknesses when I should have asked for help. What I’m saying is, don’t be afraid of me, Noelle.”
The look in his eyes said it all. A boyish sadness flashed across his features as he gazed into my eyes.
And it was right there in the woods, surrounded by Mother Nature, that without doubt I trusted Callen implicitly.
Chapter Eleven
Callen
*~*DAY 46*~*
I read the message, again, for the tenth time wondering what she had in store for our outing.
Noelle: Be ready at noon. Dr. Meyers is giving us till four today. That’s four whole hours! Woo hoo! And… I have a surprise for you. ;)
It’d been three long fucking days since I saw Noelle. Every muscle in my body was tense, even with the daily vigorous workouts I’d been putting it through. Nothing happened between us the day she took me to the park. I sounded like a fucking kid. Took me to the park.
Jesus!
She’d been giving me the excuse that her father had swamped her with work for the upcoming church picnic as the reason she hadn’t come to see me. I had a feeling it had to do with what went down in the park. I’d seen the petrified look in her eyes after I spread the blanket on the ground and known it wasn’t the time to explore her body. Even if I’d been semihard since she had texted me and told me where we were going.
If it hadn’t been for our sexting followed by idle chat every night, I would’ve thought I was losing her. On my part, as much as the distance between us was intensifying my feelings toward her, I knew touching her would only damage both of us. I’d realized that any kind of relationship outside of her being my visitor was a fucking pipe dream. I had plenty of years on her that she hadn’t even explored yet. Yeah, we could probably have a great fucking fling, but that’d be all.
She might have penetrated some of my walls, but the ones that held the dark, she hadn’t even dented.
The vibration of the cell in my hand broke me from my thoughts. I looked to the screen, saw the number, and went to close my door for privacy.
“Hey,” I said as my greeting.
“Hey man, sorry it took me so fucking long. Had a damn pipe burst in the coffee shop and had to have contractors come in and replace the damaged drywall.”
“Yeah, Mom told me yesterday. Glad to hear you got it all worked out now.”
Ben sighed and added, “Yeah, after a few grand tossed at the crew to work overnight it’s all fixed and the shop is back open. Damn, you would have thought I was the only coffee shop around for fucking miles, the way these people stated how much they missed us while we were closed.” He finished on a laugh.
I chuckled and told him, “Ben, as much as I’d like to chat, Noelle is gonna be here in about thirty minutes—”
“Ahhh,” he crooned, cutting me off. “The infamous chick is still in the picture, huh?”
“Shut the fuck up.”
“You get a piece of that yet?” he teased.
“Dude, shut the hell up,” I growled.
“Oh, someone’s getting testy.” Ben laughed.
“Seriously, man, I ain’t got much time. You hear from that guy?” I asked, and went to the window, looking out at the small pond.
I heard a rustle of papers. “Yeah, I got it all right here. But, Cal, I’d rather tell you in person, man.”
“Ben, I appreciate your concern, buddy, but I need to know.” I moved from the window and went to sit on the edge of my bed.
“Okay,” he said in a somber voice. “This Chase Black is fucking thorough, man.”
“Good, what’d he find?”
“Fuck, man.” He sighed. “What if I come down their next weekend? We can sit and go over everything?”
“Ben,” I thundered, then looked to the door to make sure no one came running in. I waited a beat, then finished in a whispered rumble, “Tell me, now.”
“Okay, man, but brace,” he said. “Olivia was doing drugs and fucking around—”
“I know that,” I said, cutting him off.
“Wait, you knew that?” He sounded surprised.
“Yep, after we moved to Georgia to get away from her druggie friends, she started acting fucking weird again. I had my suspicions she was up to the same old shit, and one night when she went out I searched through her stuff. Looked in her e-mails and came across one for an appointment for an eight-week fucking prenatal ultrasound.”
“Jesus Christ, Cal. Why in the fuck didn’t you tell me this?” His voice was firm and tight.
“I don’t know, man, I don’t know.” I let that hang between us, and continued. “Was gonna tell her I wanted a divorce the night I came home and found the house surrounded by cops and ambulances.”
Ben let out a huge breath and asked, “Is there more you aren’t sharing, man?”
I knew this wasn’t the right time to lay this shit on my brother, so I diverted the question. “Listen, I gotta get ready, sign some papers so they let me outta here for a w
hile. If I text you with an address later, can you send the file to it?”
“Cal, just let me—”
“Ben, for fucks sake, just send it,” I growled.
“Okay, shit, calm down. As soon as you text me the address, I’ll overnight it. But buddy….” He paused and I heard him take another deep breath. “Just remember that part of your life is over, and what’s in the past can’t touch you.”
“I know, Ben.”
*~*~*
I came down the hallway with my eyes fixed on the woman who’d occupied ninety-nine percent of my mind. Her bright blue eyes were shining, lined with a smoky shadow. Glossy pink lips were curled up in a sly smile. Her hair was down and done up with slight waves, and all that made her appear much older than she actually was. A fitted black halter top hugged her tits perfectly, and even as hot as the July day was she was dressed in tight-as-fuck blue jeans, jeans that had you seeing every delicious curve of her tiny frame. And as I got closer, I noticed that her toes were painted a deep crimson as they peeked out from the low-heeled sandals she had on.
Fuck!
And as hot as she fucking looked, I liked her better when she was in her flowy shirts, shorts, hair pulled up and flip-flops on with no makeup.
I looked around before I whispered, “Jesus, princess, where in the fuck are we going?”
She smiled, did a little twirl, and asked excitedly, “You like?”
“Fuck yeah.” I told her the truth because I did like, but just preferred her natural look more.
“You look nice too,” she admitted.
I looked down and took in my white T-shirt with Westbrook Coffee Shop printed in black on the front with a cup of steaming coffee set behind the words, faded blue jeans, and white sneakers. I shrugged.
“No beanie?” she asked, cocking her head to the side.
“Nope.” I involuntarily ran a hand through my hair.
She watched the movement and said, “I like it.”
We stared at each other a beat before I broke the moment. “We good to go?”
“Yep.” She jumped. “Let’s get out of here.”
We were in her piece-of-shit car and heading down the long road that led to freedom when I asked, “Could I have my brother overnight something to your house and the next time you come you can bring it?”
“Umm,” she drawled, and came to a stop at the end of the driveway before turning her blinker on. “Why can’t he send it to you?”
“They go through our mail, and he’s sending a file with some material that no one needs to see.” I told her somewhat of the truth.
They did go through our mail, but only to make sure there was nothing in it that could be used to harm ourselves. If they’d opened the envelope and saw nothing but papers, they’d most likely close it back up without a second thought. But I didn’t want to take a chance.
“Yeah, sure,” she said, and went ahead with giving me her address. I texted it to my brother.
He came back with a quick response.
Ben: I’m heading to the post office in about an hour. I’ll overnight it. Cal, when you look through it, call me. Please.
Me: Will do. Take care buddy.
I knew his concerns were for my well-being, but I didn’t have any plans to call him when I looked through the file.
I’d been too busy texting with my brother to realize she had pulled into a hotel parking lot. Attached to it was a restaurant that looked to be popular, as people were filing in and out, so I didn’t give it much thought when she found a spot, pulled in, and turned the car off.
We got out, and I was just about to ask about the place we were going to eat at, when I saw her reach into the back seat and pull out an overnight bag.
“Noelle?” I called gently.
“Yes,” she answered, and when her head lifted from the back seat, I saw a light flush fill her cheeks.
“What’s going on?” I questioned, tilting my head to the side.
She slammed the door and nonchalantly threw the bag over her shoulder as she began to walk toward the double doors of the hotel. “It’s a surprise.”
I watched her ass moving under the denim, which made my cock throb, before I followed. When we entered the hotel, she smiled at the woman behind the desk.
“Good afternoon.”
The woman replied with the same, and then looked to me. I didn’t offer a greeting, as I wasn’t sure why in the fuck we were there. I stayed a step behind Noelle as she made her way past the counter, by the elevators, and made a right.
Hmm, no elevator.
Once down that long hall, we made another right, then a quick left into a long corridor lined with roughly five doors, only on the right side. Each one of them was numbered with the word suite underneath.
“Noelle?” I called firmly.
“Hush, Callen.” We stopped in front of suite three, where she pulled out a card from her back pocket and slid it into the slot.
Once inside, she went straight to the bathroom and shut the door.
“Noelle?” This time my voice was hard and rough.
“Callen, sit on the bed and relax, okay?” Her muffled voice shouted from behind the wooden door.
I looked around the room and took in the king-size bed covered in a soft white comforter, four pillows stacked neatly against a gray wood headboard. The furniture consisted of two nightstands, a desk, and a coffee table that sat in front of two plush chairs covered in a colorful abstract-patterned fabric. A large flat-screen TV hung on the opposite wall of the bed. This is a fucking suite?
I was just about to yell to her again when I heard water begin to run, so I moved more into the spacious room, wondering what made it a suite. I went to what I thought was a window but was sliding glass doors. I’d found my answer; they led out onto a private patio with a small in-ground pool, high cement walls assuring privacy. Two lounge chairs and a few potted plants filled the area, giving it a serene setting. I went over to the window by the chairs, opened the curtains, and looked out onto a small patio filled with tables.
When I heard the bathroom door open, I swung around. Noelle made her way out still dressed in the same clothes but without her shoes.
“You like the room?” she whispered.
I glanced around. “Yeah.” I looked back at her, threw my hands out to the sides, and asked, “What is this all about, Noelle?”
“Come on, Callen.” She took a deep breath. “You know.”
I wasn’t fucking dumb, and the thought had entered my mind when we walked into the room. But when I remembered the look on her face in the park, I’d squashed it and thought she had something else planned.
“You want me to fuck you here?”
“Well….” She lifted her shoulders slightly, glanced around the room, and whispered, “Yes.”
“Not gonna fucking happen, Noelle,” I grated out, feeling my body began to fill with anger.
“Why not?” She put her hands on her hips and didn’t let me answer, her voice rising. “Am I not good enough for you? Do I not look old enough?”
“Noelle, it’s not—”
She cut me off and her voice was bursting with hurt and rage as she went on, “Oh, it is because I am a virgin?” She rolled her eyes and continued. “See, I thought most guys liked it, found it exciting, but maybe not you, huh, Callen?”
“Jesus Christ, Noelle.” I ripped my shirt from my body and tossed it onto the bed. “This what you fucking want?”
“Callen—”
“We are not right for each other,” I roared. “Fuck—”
Again, she cut me off. “Is it my lack of experience, Callen? Do I need to eat out another girl’s pussy while you finger fuck me, is that how it needs to be?”
She wasn’t even finished when I lunged toward her, pinning her against the wall with my body.
“Goddammit, Noelle. I fucking can’t, okay?” I rumbled in her face. “I just fucking can’t!”
I stepped back and gazed into her worried, pained features
, and knew I had to reel in my anger. Walking away, I took a deep breath and went back to the window. Silence filled the thick air in the room. My chest felt constricted and I didn’t know if it was because of the pain evident on her beautiful face, or all the things I wanted to say to her.
“Please, Callen,” she begged, and snaked her way between me and the window. Her arms wound around my waist and the heat of them seared into my cold flesh. Trying to ignore her plea and the need to throw her down and fuck her hard was becoming an unbearable fight inside.
“Callen,” she whispered. “Look at me, please.”
I bent my head and did what I knew I shouldn’t and looked right into her fucking soft blue eyes, causing my dick to twitch. My heart compressed when a single tear fell. Before it had a chance to slide down her cheek, I caught it with my thumb, skating the rough digit across her smooth skin.
“Touch me.” Her voice was low and wanting.
“I can’t,” I told her in a rough, deep whisper.
Another tear fell, but this time I let it go and watched it slowly work its way down her face.
“Why?”
“’Cause I’ll strip you of your innocence, princess.” I told her the truth in a hoarse whisper.
Her arms loosened and her hands slowly worked their way around my hips. Gradually, cautiously, she splayed her fingers and moved them up my chest, feeling every centimeter of my bare skin as she explored the rigid muscles of my abs.
“Noelle,” I grated in warning.
She didn’t listen as she continued moving up; her palms grazing my nipples had me sucking in a breath. My cock growing to its limits against my jeans was becoming painful.
“Baby,” I whispered, and brought my hands to cradle her beautiful face. “One fucking taste of that sweet pussy and things will never be the same, Noelle.”
“I don’t care, Callen. I want you.” With her half-lidded eyes on mine, she whispered, “I want to be yours and yours only.”
It was then all reasonable thought flew from my head. I had this gorgeous woman asking me to take the most treasured gift she had, her virginity. In a flash, I moved my hands from her face, bent, and hoisted her up. She wrapped her legs around my waist. My lips touched hers, and I pushed a hand into her hair and pulled. She let out a yelp and I took advantage and sank my tongue into her sweet mouth. Her tongue met mine, and the fierce duel began. Our breaths were harsh in the silent hotel room as we tried to get into the depths of each other’s mouths, knowing where this kiss would lead.
DAY 31 Page 10
