“I don’t want you to marry him,” he cries, face in his hands, knees curled up into the fetal position.
Poor guy. I hate seeing him like this.
“You have Cammy, Johnathan. You aren’t supposed to act this way on my wedding day. I’m going to marry James. I love James.” I talk softly, steadily, coaxing him in my sweetness, trying to get him to stop this madness.
“But...” He looks up at me, swiping away his tears. “I love you too. I love you more. More than the rest of them. More than Stacy—” he nods towards Stace— “More than James, Cammy, Deacon or any of them combined. I love you that much.”
Sounding like a little kid whining, I can’t help but smile, which makes him frown even deeper. He’s like an adorable three year old, tangled in a web of formidable emotions.
“I’m serious, baby, I love you more than the rest of them. You aren’t supposed to marry that big goon. You’re supposed to marry me.”
I can’t hold it back any longer; I belt an amused laugh and grin at him.
“Don’t give me that, baby. I’m serious.” Pouting his lips with weepy eyes, I kneel down and kiss his forehead.
“I love you, Johnathan. I’m not going anywhere. I’m living with you, I’m not moving away. James, the twins and I, are all staying put. We are just tying the knot, honey. Stop this nonsense and be happy for me—for us. You have your kinky ‘bitch’ and I have my soul mate. We have both lucked out. We have each other and people who love us.” I lovingly caress the middle of his forehead to his temple and he sighs, relaxing his tense shoulders, producing a rather weak smile. I’ll take it. Weak smile is better than no smile at all.
“That’s my big man. Now, honey, stop ruining my day and get your ass out there so we I can get down that aisle and the party can start.” I grab his arm and try to haul him from the ground and he lazily accepts my help and stands. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I pull him into a brief hug, kiss him on the cheek and rush him out the door.
Okay, disaster averted. Emotional basket case still on the loose but I just pray that he can keep it under control until I finally saunter sexily toward my hunk of a man, who is probably wondering where the hell I am.
Grabbing Stacy’s arm, I tug him hastily from the room. We are already five minutes behind schedule and I want to get married just as the sun is setting. Exiting my bedroom I nearly plow into my giant of a dad, who stops me and envelops me in a bone crushing hug.
“Okay, Dad, I can’t breathe.”
“Oh, sorry, sweetie, you ready?” Letting me go, he offers me his arm and I tuck mine into his elbow.
Stacy takes the lead as my only attendant and we trail him out the back doors and into the grass just before the raised deck.
Standing in the plush grass, I squash my toes in to focus on anything other than my deep seeded emotions. Stace is right, I have to hold my head high and preserve the melt down for after the ceremony. I can’t ugly cry in my wedding pictures. Those will be….well—ugly.
The Prayer begins to play as the four piece orchestra and piano welcomes me to the top of the deck. Offering me the perfect view of the ceremony and ocean. Where eight boats are anchored in shallow waters, undoubtedly taking long distance photos of my wedding. Stupid paparazzi. Putting the gawkers on ignore, before I lose my cool, I turn my gaze to soak in my ceremony. On either side of the silk white aisle runner, littered with red and pink rose petals, are forty white wooden folding chairs and my friends and family who are patiently standing barefoot alongside them. All of their attention is focused on me and my father, awaiting my descent down the steps and aisle to meet the love of my life at the altar, that is set on a white raised platform with a vine and red rose draped pergola. As much as I prefer daisies, the roses are breathtaking.
“Are you ready, sweetie?” My dad, pats my hand, full of loving encouragement and I nod assuredly.
“Yes, Daddy, I’m ready.”
Slowly we descend the stairs, one careful step at a time. The glorious California sun is just falling into the horizon, over the darkness of the deep blue ocean.
Gliding my bare feet onto the silky smooth runner, I nervously glance up and lock eyes with the love of my life, who is intently watching me with the biggest, warmest smile adoring his handsome face. Standing tall, attempting to exude confidence, I gracefully promenade up the silk runner keeping ahold of the one thing that gives me the strength, my love, my Papa Bear. Suddenly everything around me fades into foggy oblivion and all I can see is him, wearing his black linen pants, a silk black dress shirt scrunched up around his forearms, barefoot and radiating all the love one person can possess, toward me. Silently encouraging me with his charming smile and hazel eyes.
I can do this. I can finally marry the man I was destined to be with. I can stand in front of thousands of fans and in front of the media, I can surely get over this thick knot bunched in the pit of my stomach. Forty closest family and friends shouldn’t trigger my anxiety but I can’t help it. This is my wedding day!
Ending in front of the pergola, James comes down to greet me, offering my father a strong handshake, and takes my hand into his, guiding me up the two steps in front of the justice of the peace.
I can’t believe this is happening! I don’t know if I can talk. I’m supposed to recite my own vows. What if I screw them up?
Squeezing my hand, James knocks me out of my reverie and back into the overwhelming present.
“Sweetheart, it’s okay.” Leaning down, he places a sweet kiss on my cheek. “I’m nervous too,” he whispers, staring straight into my eyes.
“I didn’t know it would be this nerve wracking,” I admit, quietly.
Nodding, he leans back over and places his hot and sultry mouth next to my ear, shocking my greedy whore to wake up and realize it’s him standing here. Now fully awake, she’s ignited a renewed confidence in me.
“It’s just us up here. Forget about everyone else. It’s just you and me,” he reassures in his sweet tone, his hot breath washing over me in wanton need.
What the hell? Who gets turned on getting married? Apparently me. I’m such an idiot. Correction, my pussy is a greedy bitch and she just loves the hell outa some James dick. She’s the idiot. I’m a normal woman. Okay, not normal, normal. But close enough.
“Sweetheart, are you ready?” He asks, retreating to stand next to me, both of his hands holding mine.
“Yes.”
The justice of the peace proceeds with his ceremonial openings and greetings. I barely soak up a word, all I can seem to do is focus on James, and he I. Us living in our own private Emily and James bubble.
As the words come to light, “If anyone knows of any reason these two should not be wed, speak now or forever hold your peace.” My eyes widen as does James’s and we simultaneously turn our heads out toward the audience.
My heart pounding in my chest, my hands turning slick, I searching the crowd for the one person who could cause a problem.
Standing at the side of the ceremony, leaning against the railing of the staircase, is Johnathan and he is bawling. Tears are flowing freely down his face and my heart starts to crack. Poor Johnathan, how could I have hurt him this bad? Now I feel heart wrenchingly terrible.
“Johnathan,” James speaks up and Johnathan looks to him, his face beat red, snot running from his nose. “Come up here, and stand with us, please, I know this isn’t easy buddy, but you are a part of our lives and Emily needs you.”
Wow, and here I thought I was already marrying a perfect man. How could he get any better?
Cammy grabs Johnathan’s arm and pulls him in tow through the sand and around the outside of the chairs, along the side by Stacy and up the two steps to join us. She pats me on and arms and retreats to sit in the front row.
“Here.” I look to James’s hands, silently asking for permission to let him go for just a moment, he seems to understand my plea and lets me take care of my crying Johnathan. The man who may not be for me, is still a big part of my life, who I
still dearly love.
“Sweetie.” I grab his face, forcing him to look at me and I swipe away his tears. “Stand behind me, and be a part of this. I may not be marrying you. But we are all in this together,” I reassure him with a soft smile and all he can seem to do is bounce his saddened head and frown.
“Do you want to be up here with us?”
“No,” he mopes.
“Why?”
“You know why. It hurts too much.”
“If you are up here and are by my side, don’t you think you might feel a little better about this? I want you to marry Cammy, Johnathan. I want you to be happy with her. And when you two finally get to that place in your lives, I will be up here holding your hand through it all. You are one of my best friends. You may drive me crazy but I love you and we are all in this together. You, me, James, Cammy, Stacy and Kyle. We are a family, with Dylan and the twins. None of us are leaving, none of us are walking away. Don’t ruin this day. Celebrate it, with all of us. You’re not losing me. You’re gaining so much more. A closure to our old life and a brand new one with so many more possibilities.”
“Ok.” Still frowning, he agrees and James claps him supportively over the shoulder.
I truly have the most patient and kindest man I am marrying. Stacy reaches out and pulls Johnathan down a step, closer to him and being the sweet caring Stacy we all know and love, he holds Johnathan’s hand. I do have the best men in my life.
“Okay, sir, we are ready to move forward,” James cuts in, and gestures for him to get the show on the road.
Let’s do this thing!
I know some people find our situation strange or unconventional. But Johnathan means a lot to us all. Even if he is a jerk or a cheater. He is my jerk and my cheater. Even if you don’t marry someone, it doesn’t mean you don’t love them. I wasn’t made for Johnathan, I was made for James and I want the whole world to know it. At the same time I need Johnathan to see he is not losing me as a person, I am still his, in his own messed up mind. It may not make a lick of sense. But, I know Johnathan and he’s never going to let me go, or I him. I can’t give up on him or leave him. I also can’t and don’t want to marry him. As screwed up as that may be, we are a family and family sticks together. Family kicks each other in the ass, and bitch slaps them into next Tuesday for being a fuck up. But in the end, family is what matters most and James, Johnathan, Cammy, Kyle, Stacy, Dylan and the twins are my closest family— apart from my parents, of course.
Placing my hands back into James’s, I mouth ‘I’m sorry’ to him and he shrugs and smiles, mouthing, ‘I love you,’ back to me. Awe, he really is amazing.
“It’s time for your vows. Calvin, would you like to start?” The justice of the peace states. I’m pretty sure he skipped a few steps but hey, what do I know? We didn’t have a rehearsal and I can’t ever remember attending a wedding. So vows it is.
Delving deep into my eyes, the world fades out again as James begins to recite his vows to me.
“I, Papa Bear, take you, Mama Bear, to be my lawfully wedded wife, because you saved me, healed me and are the best part of me. I never knew what love was until you unexpectedly climbed into my heart, claiming it as your own. You are beautiful, inside and out. I admire you, your courage, your strength and most of all your ability to love unconditionally. To see past peoples faults and accept them for who they are and not who you expect them to be. You saw the real me, beneath this tough exterior, under all the pain and years of self-doubt. You have made me whole in ways I never knew were possible. Some may say fairytales can’t come true. But you are my fairytale. I’m the frog turned into a prince by the simple touch of your undying love. And I promise to spend the rest of our days in this life and the next, telling you how beautiful you are to me, to worship the ground you walk on, to be your strength when you are weak, to always be faithful, for the soul that inhabits my body could never want another, you are it, you are my all, you are mine. I will love you, eternally.”
Oh. My. God!
Scrunching my face, close to pain, I burst into a blubbering mess of salty tears. Without a second thought, James has me in his arms, cradling my trembling, highly emotional body, tightly against his warmth.
Oh. My. God! I can’t believe he wrote that. That was a flawless, tender and the most perfect declaration of love that I could ever imagine.
My Papa Bear, I love you so much.
Wrapping my arms around him, I press my head to his heat in attempt to soak in his relaxing spirit.
“Thank you,” I mutter, pressing tiny kisses to his heart.
“My lady, it’s alright, I will hold you as long as you need. Anytime you ever need.”
“No, thank you for marrying me,” I clarify.
Releasing me from his embrace he cups my chin in his big hand.
“So beautiful,” he smiles and wipes my hot tears away. “You ready to finish? So you can get your prize?”
“You’re my prize.” I whimper, my bottom lip quivering, overwhelmed with happiness.
“Awe, sweetheart, no, you are mine and I promise to show you how much.” He winks, gliding his warm palm sweetly across my cheek and reclaiming my hands in his.
“Emily, are you ready to recite your vows?” The justice of the peace asks.
“Yes,” I nod assuredly.
Taking in a deep cleansing breath, I ready myself.
Almost done, I am almost Emily Sue James, a married mother of two. I love the sound of that.
“I Emily, take you my Papa Bear to be my lawfully wedded husband, for you are not only my lover, and my friend, you are also a part of me. Without you, I am only a half of a whole. You are the kindest, sweetest, strongest and most generous man ever to walk this earth and into my heart. It’s true when they say, the heart wants what the heart wants, and my heart only beats for you. Thank you for choosing me and being my rock, my Bear. I couldn’t have survived so much in my life without your love and gentle hand. I am yours and you are mine, until my last breath on this earth. I will always love and belong to you.”
Whew, that wasn’t so hard.
James hasn’t moved and the gentle tears trickling slowly out of the corner of his eyes, tells me all I need to know.
“Now, it’s time for the rings,” our officiant declares, moving us right along.
Johnathan takes James white gold wedding band from Stacy and hands it to me. I had it engraved last week that says ‘Two Hearts Beat as One’ around the inside.
Exchanging of the rings is sweet and simple, and as it concludes James doesn’t hesitate another second, he captures me protectively in his warm loving embraces and plants a deep, longing kiss on my lips— Just as the officiant pronounces us husband and wife.
Threading my hands around the back of his neck, I hold him to my mouth and gently lick the seam of his big lips to invite me in. And he does with an intense growl, darting his thick minty tongue into my mouth, passionately kissing me like no one has ever done before. Sucking the air from my lungs, my mind headily swirls as our kiss turns into a hot inferno of lust filled want and need. His hands roam my back, and all I can focus on his my throbbing pussy and his sultry decadent lips consuming me, owning me, loving me.
Oh James!
“Ah-hem.” Someone clears their throat, and I open my eyes and realize that, yes, me and my husband are now making out like horny teenagers in front of our closest friends and family.
Pulling away from him, and shaking it off, I laugh and turn bright red, bursting with embarrassment.
James wraps his arm around my waist, locking us hip-to-hip. Or, my hip to his thigh, that’s the reality of it.
“I’d like to introduce Mr. and Mrs. Calvin and Emily James,” the justice of the peace calls out and we bow to the clapping crowd, then head down the two steps to mingle with our beloved family. Let the celebration begin.
***
“Would the bride and groom please take the dance floor for their first dance as husband and wife,” the DJ summons.
/> “Time to dance, sweetheart,” my husband says, claiming my hand and I place Eric back into my mother’s arms.
The reception thus far has been unbelievably magical. Stacy outdid himself with this party. The courtyard that fills behind the main house, where the two smaller houses sit, has been transformed into a fairytale wonderland of elegant proportions. All of the green shrubs lining the property have been ornamented with thousands of white lights. Wire has been strung high above our heads and crisp white round paper lanterns illuminate us hanging from those wires. There are seven round tables draped with the finest white linens, pink napkins and bone white china adorn the place settings and the center pieces are large hurricane lamps with white pillar candles and sand sitting inside them. Stunning—is the first word that comes to mind, when soaking in all of this beauty.
A wooden dance floor and stage has been assembled as the focal point of the evening. An entire band set up and white grand piano takes up the majority of the platform.
After our hugs and congratulations concluded, we came here to eat, drink and be merry—and that is precisely what we do. Traditionally, speeches are given before the dinner services but Stacy decided for whatever reason to delay them until after we drink champagne with our white chocolate and fresh strawberries and cream three tiered wedding cake, that is topped adorably with nothing less than a pair of white kissing bears.
Dinner tonight was both chicken and steak served with a side of garlic mashed potatoes, baby carrots and a separate salad with a scrumptious homemade vinaigrette, that I must get the recipe for.
Gliding me to the dance floor, James spins me into his arms and we come together, my left hand resting lovingly on his shoulder, my right hand wrapped up in his, and he presses it to his heart, holding it there. Glancing down at me, he leans in and kisses my forehead.
“Enjoy your present sweetheart,” he says, with a sweet smile and guides us around so I can able to get a full view of the stage from this angle.
Suddenly, I realize what is happening. A beautiful dark skinned man and a cute redheaded woman with a violin pressed to her chin enter from the side of the platform, the man takes a seat on the white piano bench as the woman stands next to him, angling the man’s microphone down towards his mouth.
Stricken Rock Series: Complete Box Set Page 89
