‘I don’t see how anything else could be scarier than what happened in the woods. Of course I’m staying, but shouldn’t you tell your dad or even the police?’
‘There’s no need, Geoff, because as I told you, the government are going to sort it out. We can’t tell anyone, especially my dad. He wouldn’t understand and he’d have you on the next train home and have me sent back to Professor…… Anyway, you don’t want to hear about that. So, if you’re in this with me, we’ll get on with the game.’
‘I’m in, one for one and one for two,’ Geoff said and slapped his hand against Jamie’s as part of the ritual.
‘One for all, all for one, you, dumbo. You never could remember that. Before I let you play an awesome game I want to show you a bit of a footy match. You’ll like it because Michael Owen played in this one.’
Geoff hero worshipped his favourite footballer even though he no longer played for Liverpool and responded with, ‘Great, awesome.’
When the Liverpool players ran out of the tunnel at the start of the game the face of the player wearing the famous number 10 shirt wasn’t Michael Owens’s, but Geoff’s. Each time Geoff asked Jamie how it was done he just smiled and asked him to watch the match. The games had only been going for two minutes when Geoff Owen scored a spectacular goal and Geoff nearly hit the ceiling and Jamie stopped the game fearing that his dad would come to investigate the racket. He promised to show it again later and explained that he had used an old school photograph of Geoff to replace Michael Owen’s face.
‘Could you do this with any film and anybody?’
‘I just need the substitute face and the film. I can change the body shape if I need to so that it matches the new face. I’ve got one where our Leanne’s head appears on the body of a monkey and I’ve got a classic one that stars my Auntie Helen, but I won’t spoil it by telling you what part she plays.’
Before the boys headed downstairs Jamie let Geoff play Fighter Pilot and Jamie lost count of the number of times Geoff had used the words, ‘ace’ and ‘awesome’.
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
Jamie wasn’t sure how much Geoff had taken in about his made up story of the secret government experiment that had gone wrong, but his friend was certainly nervy when they reached the field to play football. The field was open on three sides and the other one was bordered by some woods, but they were much smaller than Haverley Woods. Geoff kept looking in the direction of the woods while they were playing and hesitated to retrieve a high ball that went over his head and rolled towards the trees.
‘Go and get it, Geoff, I’ll keep a look out for the birds,’ Jamie teased, smiling as he watched his friend reluctantly run towards the ball, but he wasn’t the first to reach it. Geoff would normally have laughed and shooed away the little white poodle that had beaten him to the ball, but he was remembering Jamie’s earlier warning that they needed to be wary of any animal, no matter how small. The memory of the encounter with the freaky looking bird was still fresh in Geoff’s mind and he would rather look a fool than end up being attacked by who knows what. It was pure fear that made him scramble up the nearest tree until he was six feet off the ground.
An elderly lady came out of the woods and gave Geoff a bemused look and a scolding. ‘You are a silly boy. He’s not going to harm you.’
Jamie was still laughing when a sheepish Geoff came back with the ball and threw it to Jamie.
‘You can go next time. I’m sorry that you told me all those things. I kept expecting that little pooch to turn in to a lion, or a rhinoceros.’
Jamie was feeling a bit guilty for making up the story and warning Geoff to be wary of even small animals when they had been walking to the field, but he still laughed when he kicked the ball towards Geoff. The boys gasped when the ball was stopped midway between them by snakes that had suddenly appeared as though they had risen from ground. The strange looking snakes that had crocodile jaws growled like a tigers as they headed off in different directions before turning and moving towards the terrified boys who were now standing together.
‘Let’s run,’ Jamie shouted and sprinted away, closely followed by Geoff, but the two groups of snakes who had joined forces chased after the boys at a speed far greater than a snake normally attained.
Jamie tripped and Geoff crashed into him when they saw the line of bigger snakes in front of them that began hissing as they moved in closer. The bigger snakes had crocodile jaws like the smaller ones, buffalo horns and a row of eyes that were equally spaced along the entire length of their backs with one large eye between their horns. The boys scrambled to their feet and when Jamie suggested that they separated they ran off in different directions, but were soon back together as more snakes joined the circle that had formed around them.
‘At least they’re not coming any closer,’ Jamie noted and tried to stay calm.
‘Do you think these are to do with that experiment thingy?’ Geoff asked.
‘They must be.’ Jamie replied, knowing that Devilmortex was up to his tricks and Jamie looked towards the sky hoping that Soupinpota’s help would reach them in time, because the snakes were on the move again and closing in.
‘Geoff, perhaps if we charge into them one of us will get through.’
‘They would be too quick for us. If we stay really still they may just come close and ignore us.’ Geoff suggested, but he was going to have difficulty keeping still because he was already shaking. The boys had closed their eyes, too frightened to look, but they flashed open when they heard the familiar screeching. The sky above them was filled with fluttering Triopticas, as Jamie had christened them. This time they were even bigger and there must have been at least twenty of them. They peeled away like fighter planes picking their target as they dived down and gripped the tail of a snake and flew to a dropping zone well away from the boys. The bigger snakes had suddenly acquired wings and flew off, but not before two of them dived bombed the boys, brushing against their heads as they flew over them and one of them plucked Geoff’s beanie hat from his head.
The boys were mesmerised by the speed at which the ring that had circled them disappeared and the pile of snakes was formed as the birds dropped their captures on top of the heap below them. Jamie and Geoff were still terrified as they looked towards the sky, fearing that the flying snakes might return. When the last snake was dropped onto the pile a group of red winged Trioptica hovered above and spewed forth a giant sheet of flame causing a bonfire of sizzling snakes.
Jamie looked up to the sky and whispered, ‘Thanks, Soupinpota.’
Jamie could see that Geoff was more traumatised than he had been during the previous attack by the giant bird.
‘It’s all right mate, we’re okay now.’ Jamie said trying to reassure Geoff and joked when he told him that they wouldn’t be staying for the barbecue and they wouldn’t be going back to get the ball. Geoff didn’t need any persuading when Jamie suggested that they headed for home as fast as they could. As Jamie ran across the field he heard the grunting sound behind him and he was thinking that at least Geoff must have recovered from the trauma and was larking about. When the grunting got louder, Jamie laughed and turned around, but there was no sign of Geoff and the grunting was from a very large gorilla who was dragging its long arms along the ground.
Jamie didn’t know whether to run or stand perfectly still. Standing still had been the best thing to do when Karl, their old neighbour’s Alsatian was threatening to bite him. ‘Never stare at a dog’ had always been his dad’s advice.
Jamie scanned the field wondering what had happened to his friend while repeatedly calling out his name and then he noticed Geoff’s binoculars were dangling from the gorilla’s neck.
‘Sufferin’ jelly fish,’ Jamie cried out as it dawned on him that either the gorilla had attacked Geoff or the gorilla was Geoff. While he was trying to decide which was the most likely, the gorilla stood up to its full height and roared, which was Jamie’s cue to run off at a speed that would likely have earned him a p
lace in the County Athletics Team. When Jamie realised that he could no longer hear the grunting he turned around again and saw that the gorilla was heading towards the woods.
‘Flippen heck, what am I going to do,’ Jamie sighed as he realised what a fix he was in. He couldn’t go home and tell his dad that he’d lost Geoff, or that Geoff might now be a gorilla. There was only one thing he could do and he started chasing after the gorilla, having convinced himself that apart from a bit of roaring the gorilla hadn’t actually seriously threatened him. Perhaps it was just an image swop thingy and it was Geoff who had run away and Jamie was seeing him as a gorilla. Whatever or whoever it was had reached the edge of the woods before stopping and then gestured to Jamie to come closer and then sat on the ground.
‘Geoff, can you hear me?’ Jamie asked when he was close enough to be heard.
The gorilla tilted his head on one side and gave Jamie a puzzled look as if to say, ‘Me, no understand.’
Jamie felt confident enough to sit next to the gorilla and even shook the giant hand that was offered to him. Whatever was happening, the gorilla was real enough and the handshake had been gentle.
‘What a fine mess I’ve got you into, Stanley.’ Jamie said, remembering that Geoff was a Laurel and Hardy fan and he was also thinking that it was another Stanley who had got them into this mess, Uncle Stanley to be exact.
Jamie was lost in his thoughts when the gorilla stood up and then took Jamie by surprise when it lifted him above his head and began twirling around.
‘Put me down.’ Jamie shouted repeatedly, but it was some time before the gorilla gently placed the dizzy Jamie on the ground. Jamie staggered and then fell over and was struggling to stand up when the gorilla bent down and lifted Jamie to his feet. Jamie felt stupid after he had thanked the gorilla who appeared to be smiling at him. It was some time before Jamie’s head cleared and he was able to consider what to do. He could leave the gorilla and go home and report Geoff missing. He dismissed that one because if the police searched and discovered the gorilla they might shoot it, fearing that it was a dangerous animal and that would be the end of it and probably Geoff as well. He could hide out with the gorilla and hope that Soupinpota might come to the rescue in some way, that’s if he knew what had happened. He needed to make contact with Soupinpota, but he couldn’t risk leaving the gorilla here. While Jamie had been trying to decide what to do the gorilla was busy scratching himself
Jamie eventually came to a decision, offered his hand to the gorilla and said, ‘Come on, Geoff. We’re going home.’ The gorilla didn’t show any signs that he had understood what Jamie had said, but at least it didn’t object to Jamie leading him away.
As Jamie left the field holding the gorilla’s hand he hoped he wouldn’t be seen by anyone before he managed to smuggle the gorilla into their garden shed. He feared that Geoff might return to normal before they got home if Soupinpota was on hand to help and he would end up holding Geoff’s hand in public and that would be ‘gross’. Although his biggest fear was that the transference process could not be reversed and he would never see his mate Geoff ever again, assuming that Geoff had been turned into the gorilla. If that happened then he would no longer be able to keep his promise to keep things a secret. His mind was in turmoil as he considered that his dad might have to drive the gorilla home and try and explain to Geoff’s folks what had happened.
They reached the end of the street without being seen and now they just needed to make it to the shed without being spotted by Mister Neighbourhood Watch, Rufus Cranleigh. Jamie was thinking, so far so good, but as they crept down the side of the house he was suddenly worried by the thought that his mum might be in the kitchen and looking out into the garden. He decided he couldn’t risk frightening his mum and having to explain the predicament he was and the gorilla gave a quiet grunt when Jamie led him back to the front of the house.
‘This should take care of Mum,’ Jamie said as he rang the doorbell and then guided the gorilla back down the side of the house.
With the gorilla safely settled in the shed, Jamie made his way to the kitchen window and pressed his face against the glass, causing his mum to jump with fright and shout, ‘Jamie, don’t do that.’
‘Where’s Geoff,’ Debbie asked when Jamie entered the kitchen.
‘He’s in the shed, filling out his ‘twitcher’s book,’ Jamie replied.
‘Did you ring the doorbell, just a minute ago?’ Debbie asked.
‘Sorry, Mum, I decided to go straight to the shed?’
Debbie gave him her severest reprimanding look, but then said she would make a cup of tea for him and Geoff.
‘We’ll have one when he comes in, Mum. I need to check something on the computer, but I won’t be long.’
Jamie was pleased to see the flashing sign on the display when he walked into his special room that indicated that Soupinpota was online and after he greeted Jamie he asked, ‘How is, Geoff, your long armed friend?’ At least Soupinpota was aware of what happened and that made Jamie feel a bit better, but he was still really worried about Geoff.
‘But you will be able to change the gorilla back into Geoff?’ Jamie asked after Soupinpota had confirmed that the earlier attack, including the snakes and Geoff’s transference into a gorilla had been the work of Devilmortex.
‘That can’t be done,’ replied Soupinpota. ‘The body transfer made to your friend will have been time locked. This means that reversion will be automatic when the time expires. You will have to be patient.’
James realised the serious of what Soupinpota had just told him and asked how long it was likely to be.
‘It can be anything from seconds to minutes, days, weeks and years unless it has been set to a permanent lock. Remember what I told you about Devilmortex having access to the ATACS. Well he used it to, as you would probably say, to nobble your friend and create the form he is in now. You might have to consider giving him to a zoo where he would be amongst friends.’
When Jamie heard Soupinpota laugh, he relaxed and asked if he was joking about the demise of Geoff.
‘Yes, but what I said about time locks is true. It just so happens that your friend’s time lock is very short and he should be reverting in a few minutes. The snakes that you saw must have been the product of forward evolution with environmental modification just like he used when he created the Trioptica. Those snakes normally live in and around Lake Zebron which is the biggest lake on Planet Titantula and like the Trioptica they are not normally aggressive, but they do have very poisonous venom and could kill an elephant with a single bite.’
Jamie didn’t dwell on the lethal venom. ‘You’ve lost me now, mate. Forward, evolution and environmental modified. What does it all mean?’
‘It would take too long to explain and you should be getting back to your friend to make sure that he doesn’t create a problem for you should he decide to break out of the shed.’
Jamie panicked at the thought of Geoff getting out of the shed and terrifying his mum and he took Soupinpota’s advice by signing off and hurrying downstairs and into the garden. The grunting sound from inside the shed told him that Geoff hadn’t ‘returned’ yet, but when Jamie carefully opened the shed door he was just in time to see the process of Geoff’s transformation from gorilla back to normal.
Jamie was tempted to tell Geoff that he looked better as a gorilla, but had decided not to mention it unless Geoff knew what had happened to him.’
Geoff was looking really worried when he said, ‘Jamie, I think I’m going crackers. I don’t know how I ended up in your garden shed and whether I just had a bad dream about snakes with jaws and horns and more eyes than I could count.’
Jamie felt sort of responsible for what had happened to cause his friend so much grief and he tried to help by way of an explanation. ‘When we came back from the field you stayed in the shed to do some bird watching from the shed window and you must have nodded off. What happened on the field is all part of that government experiment I told you abou
t and you are not going crackers. I’ll try and explain some more details later, but we best go back inside the house.’
Debbie looked concerned when the boys came into the kitchen and she asked, ‘Are you all right, Geoff, you look a bit pale.’
Geoff and Jamie exchanged glances before Geoff replied that he’d just eaten too much before playing football. He resisted Debbie’s suggestion to go and have a lie down. The last thing he wanted at the moment was to be left on his own.
‘Would you boys like some fruit?’ Debbie asked and when the boys muttered a ‘No thanks,’ she tried to persuade Geoff to have a banana to settle his stomach.
Jamie’s thoughts were back on the field and imagining the gorilla eating a banana and he would normally have laughed, but he was still terrified at the thought that he could have lost his friend forever if the time lock had been permanent.
* * *
‘Have you boy’s had a falling out over football or something?’ Kevin asked as the family were having their evening meal.
‘Of course we haven’t,’ Jamie replied.
Jamie had been moving his potatoes and pie around the plate without actually eating anything. Geoff was just as worried about things, but it hadn’t affected his appetite.
‘Well something’s up to make you so quiet and you’ll make a groove in one of your mum’s best plates if you carry on fiddling with that fork.’
‘I guess we’re both a bit bored. I thought we could have a play on the computer after we’ve finished dinner. What do you think, Geoff?’
Geoff had his mouth full of pie and just nodded his agreement.
‘So why don’t you come with us to the Blue Duck. You could have a shandy in the beer garden. I don’t like taking our Leanne there, so it’s a good opportunity with her having a sleepover at a friend’s house tonight.’
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