Werner’s eyes go to the ballplayer.
LT. ALDO
That’s Sgt. Donny Donowitz. But you might know him better by his nickname, the Bear Jew. Now if you heard of Aldo the Apache, you gotta heard about the Bear Jew?
SGT. RACHTMAN
I heard.
LT. ALDO
What did you hear?
SGT. RACHTMAN
He beats German soldiers with a club.
LT. ALDO
He bashes their brains in with a baseball bat, what he does.
SGT. DONOWITZ
back to us, still haven’t seen his face. He Babe Ruths a rock soaring into the atmosphere.
LT. ALDO
Now, Werner, I’m gonna ask you one last goddamn time, and if you still “respectfully refuse,” I’m calling the Bear Jew over here, and he’s gonna take that big bat of his, and he’s gonna beat your ass to death with it.
Now take your Wiener-schnitzel-lickin’ finger and point out on this map what I want to know.
SGT. RACHTMAN
Fuck you and your Jew dogs.
Instead of getting mad, the Basterds burst out LAUGHING.
Also says to Werner, with a giggle in his voice:
LT. ALDO
Actually, Werner, we’re all tickled ya said that. Frankly, watchin’ Donny beat Nazis to death is the closest we ever get to goin’ to the movies.
(YELLING)
DONNY!
SGT. DONOWITZ
He turns to the CAMERA and yells:
SGT. DONOWITZ
Yeah?
LT. ALDO
Got a German here wants to die for his country. Oblige him.
SGT. DONNY DONOWITZ
bat over his shoulder, smiles.
CUT TO
INT—BARBER SHOP (BOSTON)—DAY
Donny, cutting heads, in his pop’s barber shop, in Boston.
DONNY
… ya got the goddamn, fuckin’ Germans, declaring open season on Jews in Europe, and I’m suppose to fly to the fuckin’ Philippines and fight a bunch of fuckin’ Japs—not me, pal. If we just go in this against the Japs, the whole U.S. of fuckin A can go take a running jump at the moon.
HEAD
You know, they got a word for what you’re sayin’ Donny. It’s called treason.
DONNY
Hey, stick your treason up your poop hole. If I’m gonna kill my fellow man in the name of liberty, that fellow man will be German.
INT—SPORTING GOODS STORE—DAY
MR. GOOROWITZ’S sporting goods shop in Donny’s Jewish Boston neighborhood. Donny walks in.
MR. GOOROWITZ
Hello, Donny. How are you?
DONNY
Ah, just dandy, Mr. Goorowitz.
MR. GOOROWITZ
Your mother, your father—everything good there?
DONNY
They’re just fine. I’m shippin’ off next week.
The store proprietor extends his hand to the young man.
MR. GOOROWITZ
Good for you, son. Kill one of those Nazi basterds for me, will ya?
DONNY
That the idea, Mr. Goorowitz.
MR. GOOROWITZ
What can I do you for, Donny?
DONNY
I need a baseball bat.
The store owner leads him to a basket with eight bats in it. Donny starts going through them without saying anything.
Mr. Goorowitz watches.
MR. GOOROWITZ
You gettin’ your little brother a present before you ship out?
Donny, concentrating on the bats, not looking up:
DONNY
No.
Donny’s “no” silences the gabby Goorowitz. He seems to settle on one, feeling its weight in his hands.
DONNY
Can I try this one on for size, outside?
Extending his arm:
MR. GOOROWITZ
Be my guest.
The phone rings.
MR. GOOROWITZ
I’ll get that. You go right ahead.
The proprietor answers the phone and gets into a conversation with his OFFSCREEN mother.
Donny walks outside. WE STAY IN STORE but can see him clearly through the store’s big picture window.
However, Mr. Goorowitz instinctively turns his back to Donny to speak with his mother.
Donny starts swinging the bat. It’s pretty obvious he’s pantomiming beating somebody to death with it. Then he starts yelling:
DONNY
Take that, ya Nazi basterd! You like fuckin’ with the Jews? Wanna fuck with the Jews? The American Jews are gonna FUCK with you… !
Mr. Goorowitz sees none of this as he speaks to his mother. He hangs up the phone just as Donny walks back into the store. The store owner turns to the store customer.
DONNY
Is this the heaviest ya got?
CUT TO
INT—HALLWAY APARTMENT BUILDING—DAY
Donny, dressed nice, in an apartment building in his Jewish Boston neighbourhood. He knocks on a door.
A VERY OLD JEWISH WOMAN opens the door, only a little, peering out at the young man.
OLD WOMAN
How can I help you?
DONNY
Mrs. Himmelstein?
MRS. HIMMELSTEIN
State your business, young man.
DONNY
Mrs. Himmelstein, I’m Donny Donowitz. My father, Sy Donowitz, owns the barber shop on Greeny Ave. Sy’s Barber Shop.
MRS. HIMMELSTEIN
I’ve seen it. Do you live in the neighborhood?
DONNY
All my life.
MRS. HIMMELSTEIN
Again, state your business?
DONNY
May I have a word with you?
MRS. HIMMELSTEIN
What about?
DONNY
Our people in Europe.
She thinks for a beat, then holds the door open for the young man.
MRS. HIMMELSTEIN
Come in. Would you like some tea?
INT—MRS. HIMMELSTEIN’S APARTMENT—DAY
Donny sits on an overstuffed sofa, holding a tea cup and saucer in his hand. Mrs. Himmelstein sits on an overstuffed chair, holding her tea, looking across at her visitor.
DONNY
(sipping tea)
Very good.
MRS. HIMMSELSTEIN
If you like tea.
Donny chuckles at her little joke. The old woman remains stone. She wasn’t joking. He places his saucer on the coffee table and begins:
DONNY
Mrs. Himmelstein, do you have any loved ones over in Europe who you’re concerned for?
MRS. HIMMELSTEIN
What compels you, young man, to ask a stranger such a personal question?
DONNY
Because I’m going to Europe. And I’m gonna make it right.
MRS. HIMMELSTEIN
And just how do intend to do that, Joshua?
He holds up his bat.
DONNY
With this.
MRS. HIMMELSTEIN
And what exactly do you intend to do with that toy?
DONNY
I’m gonna beat every Nazi I find to death with it.
She takes another sip of tea.
MRS. HIMMELSTEIN
I thought we were having tea together.
Donny picks up his cup and takes a sip.
MRS. HIMMELSTEIN
And in this pursuit, how is it that I can be of service?
DONNY
I’m going through the neighborhood. If you have any loved ones in Europe whose safety you fear for, I’d like you to write their name on my bat.
BACK TO BASTERDS
Donna takes a long walk to Werner…
PVT. BUTZ
watches all this…
As WE CUT BACK and FORTH BETWEEN DONNY WALKING and WERNER WAITING, WE ALSO CUT BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN DONNY and MRS. HIMMELSTEIN …
MRS. HIMMELSTEIN
You must be a
real basterd, Donny.
DONNY
You bet your sweet ass I am.
MRS. HIMMELSTEIN
Hand me your sword, Gideon. I do believe I will join you on this journey.
She signs the BAT: “MADELEINE.”
Donny steps up to the plate, looking down at the Nazi:
He sees the Iron Cross hanging from the German Sgt’s right pocket.
The Jew taps the German’s medal with the end of his bat.
DONNY
You get that for killing jews?
SGT RACHTMAN
Bravery.
Donny gives him a “oh yeah, we’ll see about that,” look.
The Bear Jew raises the bat up high over his shoulder and brings it down hard against the side of Rachtman’s head.
Donny beats Werner TO DEATH WITH THE BAT, to the cheers of the basterds.
PVT. BUTZ
watches. Hirschberg says to him:
PFC. HIRSCHBERG
About now, I’d be shittin’ my pants, if I was you.
Aldo points a finger at Butzs and crooks it toward him.
A crying, visibly shaken Butz sits down in front of Aldo.
LT. ALDO
You wanna live?
PVT. BUTZ
Yes, sir.
LT. ALDO
Point out on this map the German position.
His arm shoots out like a rocket and points out the positions.
PVT. BUTZ
This area here.
LT. ALDO
How many?
PVT. BUTZ
Maybe twelve.
LT. ALDO
What kind of artillery?
PVT BUTZ
They have a machine gun dug in here pointing north.
BACK TO HITLER
HITLER
How did you survive this ordeal?
WE SEE Pvt. Butz in the Führer’s room for the first time. He wears a Nazi cap, which is unusual in the presence of the Führer, but he seems okay with it.
PVT. BUTZ
They let me go.
FROM HERE ON WE GO BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN ALDO AND HITLER.
LT. ALDO
Now, when you report what happened here, you can’t tell ’em you told us what you told us. They’ll shoot ya. But they’re gonna wanna know, why you so special, we let you live? So tell ’em we let ya live so you could spread the word through the ranks what’s gonna happen to every Nazi we find.
HITLER
You are not to tell anybody anything! Not one word of detail! Your outfit was ambushed, and you got away. Not one more word.
PVT. BUTZ
Yes, mein Führer.
Pause.
HITLER
Did they mark you like they did the other survivors?
PVT. BUTZ
Yes, mein Führer.
HITLER
Remove your hat and show me.
LT. ALDO
Now say we let ya go, and say you survive the war? When you get back home, what ’cha gonna do?
PVT. BUTZ
I will hug my mother like I’ve never hugged her before.
LT. ALDO
Well, ain’t that a real nice boy. Are you going to take off your uniform?
PVT. BUTZ
Not only shall I remove it, but I intend to burn it!
The young German is telling Aldo what he thinks Aldo wants to hear. But the last answer didn’t go down as well as he thought it would, as is evident by the frown on Aldo’s face.
LT. ALDO
Yeah, that’s what we thought. We don’t like that. You see, we like our Nazis in uniforms. That way, you can spot ’em just like that.
(snaps his fingers)
But you take off that uniform, ain’t nobody gonna know you was a Nazi. And that don’t sit well with us.
Aldo removes a LARGE KNIFE from a sheath on his belt.
LT. ALDO
So I’m gonna give ya a little somethin’ you can’t take off.
BACK TO HITLER
Pvt. Butz removes his combat helmet. Hair hangs in his face. He moves it aside, and WE SEE a SWASTIKA has been HAND-CARVED INTO HIS FOREHEAD.
BACK TO BASTERDS
BUTZ’S POV
on ground, looking up at them. Aldo has just carved the swastika, and he’s holding the bloody knife. All the Basterds crowd around to admire his handiwork.
SGT. DONOWITZ
You know, Lieutenant, you’re getting pretty good at that.
LT. ALDO
You know how you get to Carnegie Hall, don’t cha? Practice.
FADE TO BLACK
OVER BLACK
CHAPTER TITLE APPEARS:
CHAPTER THREE
“GERMAN NIGHT IN PARIS”
INT—CINEMA AUDITORIUM—NIGHT
We’re in the auditorium of a cinema in Paris. However, the CAMERA is pointed in the direction of the audience, not the screen. We start CLOSE on the projector beam emanating from the little glass window in the back of the theater.
The CAMERA continues to DOLLY back, making the shot wider and wider, bringing in more and more the German-occupied citizens of Paris, who stare at the OFFSCREEN silver screen in the dark.
We can hear the OFFSCREEN SOUNDTRACK of a Goebbels-produced German omm-pa-pa musical movie being projected.
The shot continues to pull farther and farther back, and the German dialogue continues to fill the auditorium…
UNTIL…
The DOLY SHOT LANDS on a CLOSEUP of Shosanna, watching the movie.
A SUBTITLE APPEARS:
“ SHOSANNA DREYFUS
TWO WEEKS AFTER THE MASSACRE
OF SHOSANNA’S FAMILY”
We hear the sound of the German musical’s climax.
The lights go up in the auditorium.
Shosanna, dressed in a NURSE’S UNIFORM she swiped from somewhere, remains seated, as the rest of the PATRONS gather their coats and file out.
EXT—LITTLE CINEMA (PARIS)—NIGHT
Patrons exit under the cinema marquee, as someone from inside SHUTS OFF the marquee’s lights.
The MARQUEE READS in French:
“GERMAN NIGHT BRIDGET VON HAMMERSMARK in MADCAP IN MEXICO.”
EXT—PROJECTION BOOTH (LITTLE CINEMA)
A French black man, who we will learn later is named MARCEL, is the cinema’s projectionist. We see him for a moment, taking the film reels off the projector and placing them on rewinds.
INT—AUDITORIUM
CU SHOSANNA
Still sitting in her seat. Except for her, the auditorium is empty.
The owner of the cinema, an attractive-looking French woman, who we will later know as MADAME MIMIEUX, appears in one of the cinema’s opera-box balconies.
Looking down from her porch at the young girl, sitting in the empty cinema.
The DIALOGUE will be spoken in FRENCH and SUBTITLED IN ENGLISH.
MADAME MIMIEUX
So, young woman, since it’s beyond obvious we’re closed for the evening, I must assume you want something. What can I do for you?
SHOSANNA
May I sleep here tonight?
MADAME MIMIEUX
So I gather you’re not a nurse?
SHOSANNA
No.
MADAME MIMIEUX
But you’re a bright little thing. That’s a clever disguise. Where is your family?
SHOSANNA
Murdered.
MADAME MIMIEUX
So you’re a war orphan?
SHOSANNA
We were from Nancy. The Boches found us—
MADAME MIMIEUX
—Is this a sad story?
SHOSANNA.
Oui.
MADAME MIMIEUX
Sad stories bore me. These days everyone in Paris has one. I haven’t bored you with mine. Don’t bore me with yours.
Inglourious Basterds Page 4
