Taking a deep breath, Mikki attempted to distance herself from the thoughts and emotions that were somersaulting through her right now.
She changed the subject. “Um, I’ve been meaning to ask you, how is your mother doing? She’s almost due for her second recheck,” Mikki recalled.
After the seemingly nonstop day Mikki had just had, he appreciated her being so thoughtful and asking about his mother. The woman really was one of a kind.
“She’s doing well. She’s also thinking of adopting you,” he confided.
“Excuse me?”
Jeff backtracked, starting from the beginning. “To be honest, she’s surprised that she’s feeling so well. I’m only just now beginning to find out that she’d been hiding just how bad she’d been feeling all this time. But now that she’s feeling better, she’s finally admitting the true extent of her pain.”
He paused, letting that sink in, then said, “Since you, in effect, made it all better, my mother wants to show her gratitude. Best way she knows how is to adopt you.”
Mikki laughed. “Tell your mother I’m very happy I could help her and I’m touched that she wants to make me part of her family, but I really don’t need to be adopted. I have a mother.” She paused as she took another long sip of her wine, nearly finishing what had been a very small amount to begin with. “I have to admit that she’s more like a character out of a play, but I have a mother,” she told him.
There was a lot of history behind that one sentence, Jeff guessed. He could hear it in her intonation. She had aroused his curiosity. “Tell me about her.”
Mikki shook her head, dismissing the request. “You don’t want to hear about my mother.”
“Sure I do,” he told her, sitting up. “She sounds colorful.”
Mikki considered his comment. “That would be one word for her.”
“What would be another?” he asked.
Other than confiding in Nikki, she had decided a long time ago to keep her mother’s misdeeds and the way she felt about them to herself.
The glass was empty and she twirled the stem between her thumb and forefinger, searching for a way to frame her answer—or a way to deflect.
“Although neither one of my parents actually taught me this by word or example, I really, truly believe that if you can’t say something nice about a person, you shouldn’t say anything at all.”
He read between the lines. “That bad, huh?”
Mikki shrugged. Why did she feel this overwhelming desire to share any of this with this man? It wasn’t that her mother deserved her loyalty—if the tables were reversed, her mother certainly wouldn’t keep any less than stellar details about her private. But Mikki just didn’t believe in airing her dirty laundry in public.
“My mother has her demons,” Mikki said tactfully. And then, because this wasn’t exactly a secret, she said, “She’s an insecure woman who is actively searching for a Prince Charming to simultaneously sweep her off her feet and worship the ground she walks on.”
He raised his eyebrows, clearly trying to picture what she’d just described. “Sounds like that’s a tall order.”
“It’s an impossible order,” Mikki corrected.
Her childhood must have been hell, Jeff thought. With that in mind, there were a thousand ways her life could have gone awry. “Well, even so, it looks like you turned out all right.”
An ironic smile curved her lips. “That was more in self-defense than anything else,” she told him. “Rather than spending my time getting all bogged down frantically trying to find happiness, I thought it was more important to try to get outside myself and help others.”
There was a little wine left in his glass, and he raised it in another toast to her. “Well, on behalf of those others, I’d like to thank you for that.”
She didn’t like having attention focused on her. That was her mother’s thing, not hers. “You’re not exactly a slouch in that department,” she countered. “You can’t tell me that you always drive around with that much food in your car.”
“Oh.” Now he understood what Mikki was talking about. “That.”
“Yes, that,” Mikki laughed. She liked the fact that he was modest and didn’t brag. She found it really refreshing, especially after having grown up in her parents’ world.
“Well, I never got to be a Boy Scout, but I do believe in always being prepared,” Jeff told her.
“For what?” she asked. “An impromptu banquet? Admit it, you brought all that food with you because you knew I wouldn’t leave my patients to have lunch while they were stuck in the waiting room, hungry.” Which, in her book, meant that he’d been paying close attention to the way she thought and behaved.
“I guess I’m guilty as charged,” Jeff allowed vaguely.
“You’re a very generous man, Jeff Sabatino,” she told him.
“Maybe you bring out the best in me,” he suggested.
He was sitting right next to her on the sectional. Because her hair was falling into her face, he gently moved it aside with the tip of his fingers. He wanted to get a better look into her eyes.
There went her stomach again, Mikki thought, feeling it do a somersault.
Breathe, damn it, breathe!
“I don’t think it needs to be brought out,” she told him, her voice sounding strangely low to her own ear. It was as if the words were struggling to emerge. “I think it’s right there on the surface.”
“Careful,” he told her, his voice as low as hers. He set his empty glass down on the coffee table. “You’ll turn my head.”
It was as if everything around her had fallen into darkness. All she was aware of was him. “I wouldn’t want to do that,” she answered.
“I totally agree,” he whispered. “Because then I might miss.”
She didn’t have to ask him what he meant by that, or what he’d miss, because the next moment Jeff went on to show her.
He lowered his mouth to hers.
Oh, no!
The words echoed in her brain in giant capital letters.
This was worse than she thought.
She was really hoping that his kiss would be anticlimactic. That it would leave her cold and she could return to her isolated little world, none the worse for the experience.
But his kiss wasn’t anticlimactic. It was, in a word, delicious. Delicious and it left her wanting more. So much so that she slid into not just the kiss, but somehow into him, as well.
Whatever space had been between them on the sectional was gone. Gone to the point that not even a well-worn dime could be wedged between them.
Everything she had hoped not to feel she was, in essence, feeling. Heat and desire, and everything inside her was churning and swirling.
* * *
He hadn’t counted on this.
All he had wanted to do was kiss a beautiful woman—maybe several times—and then take his leave before desire had an opportunity to intensify, making him want to stay.
But desire had immediately taken on depth and breadth from the first moment of contact.
Jeff didn’t remember enfolding her in his arms, didn’t remember deepening the kiss until it was completely fathomless. Just like that, he was lost in an ocean of heated emotions.
He found himself not just wanting to kiss her, but wanting to make love with her.
Now.
And although he didn’t detect so much as even mild resistance on her part, he wasn’t about to overwhelm her in any manner, shape or form. It wouldn’t be right.
And more than that, it was no way to repay her for what she’d done for his mother and, thus, for him. She had performed a selfless act and he was behaving, in a word, selfishly.
But he couldn’t.
Exercising more strength and self-control than he’d ever had the need to before, Jeff ended the kiss and then drew away f
rom this woman who lit him up.
There was a look of surprise on Mikki’s upturned face. Surprise and more than a little confusion. Her eyes were wide as she looked at him.
“I should go home,” he told her, stringing the words together with effort.
She wasn’t sure what Jeff was actually telling her. Was he rejecting her, or had he changed his mind? In either case, she went along with it.
“I guess it’s my turn to walk you to the door,” she said with a smile, congratulating herself that her voice didn’t crack.
“You don’t have to do that,” he replied, trying to keep the situation light. “The door’s not that hard to find.”
“I have to lock it when you leave,” she pointed out.
“Oh, right.” He felt awkward about the whole situation. About giving in to his desires, and then about having to stop. “All right then,” Jeff said, gathering himself together.
He had to admit that he was rather surprised at the impact she’d just had on him. The woman was absolutely intoxicating, far more than the wine he’d just had. Even more than straight whiskey. Yes, she was beautiful, but in no way had he been prepared for her having such a lethal mouth.
“Let’s go,” he said, leading the way to her front door. He reached it in several steps. Turning around to face her, he said, “Well, we’re here.”
“Yes,” Mikki answered, her heart hammering wildly as she contemplated her next move, “I guess we are.”
He was about to say something further, but he didn’t get the chance. Because the very next moment, instead of saying “Goodbye,” Mikki was saying “Hello” in the most basic way possible.
Almost on automatic pilot for the very first time in her life, Mikki had threaded her arms around his neck and raised herself up on her toes until her mouth was less than a breath away from his.
And then it wasn’t away at all.
It was hard to say, when she tried to analyze it later, who had moved in first. Whether she had completed the move or if he had beaten her to it.
Either way, it didn’t matter who was first.
All that mattered was that when contact was finally made, fireworks went off, sealing them to one another and guaranteeing that they would remain that way, at least for the time being.
He had both wanted this, and he hadn’t. Wanted it because the very feel of her breath aroused him to such heights, it caused him to become instantly dizzy, instantly hungry.
But he didn’t want her to feel that this was because he had come to the clinic today. Didn’t want her thinking that this was his endgame and once he reached it, the game would be over.
Because whatever was happening right now, it was far from over. And while he couldn’t be accused of being a saint, or even remotely close to one, none of the women he had been with and enjoyed had ever caused this extreme, instant reaction within him.
He could barely contain himself.
And he didn’t want to.
What he wanted was to make love to every single part of her—simultaneously. Wanted it so much, it nearly scared the hell out of him.
This was something completely brand-new, and he had no idea how to react to it.
* * *
She shouldn’t be letting this happen, Mikki thought. Shouldn’t be letting it happen because the firm ground she’d thought she was standing on had vanished underneath her.
And the worst part of it was that she didn’t care.
The only thing she cared about was that she didn’t want whatever this was to stop.
Ever.
The only kind of hunger she had ever known was the kind that was satisfied by food. But this hunger was something entirely new, entirely different. She could honestly say that it was frightening in its insatiability.
Since they had come together at her door under the guise of saying goodbye, she hadn’t even stopped for air. All she wanted was to feel his hands along her body, his lips devouring hers before they ultimately moved on to leave their imprint along every throbbing inch of her skin.
Between the door and the sectional, clothes wound up vanishing, both his and hers—Mikki really didn’t remember how and when. When they were on the sectional, she was only aware of the heat radiating from her body, heat mingling with his.
Their bodies tangled together, and it was as if they were both bent on mutual pleasure while bringing one another up to heights that caused mountains to look small by comparison.
Mikki didn’t want to feel this way, didn’t want to feel as if she could touch the very sky. Because that meant that the eventual lack of this exhilarating feeling would bring with it an inconceivable pain. It would consume her and then spit her out. In pieces.
She didn’t want to become like her mother—not even close.
And yet, she couldn’t help herself. Couldn’t stop reacting to Jeff. Couldn’t stop these passions, these longings, from taking hold of her and keeping her imprisoned in their grip.
All right, all right, if this was her fate, Mikki decided, then she was going to make the most of it. And when it was gone, when he had gone on with his life and left hers, she’d force herself to accept it.
But right now, it wasn’t gone. He wasn’t gone. He was here, bringing her to the very brink of explosions time and again.
Unable to catch her breath, she was determined not to be the only one to remember this night for years to come. So for every sensation Jeff created within her, she reciprocated, mimicking his moves and then, going on instinct, creating some of her own. Each time his hands passed over her, caressing her, stimulating her, she did the same to him.
When she heard him moan, she knew she was succeeding and that spurred her on.
* * *
The woman was a veritable wildcat.
He’d had no idea that she was capable of this. Talk about still waters running deep—Mikki was an ocean. What he had discovered about her was utterly mind-blowing.
To think he had been worried about taking advantage of her. Hell, he could barely keep up.
With what amounted to the last of his strength, Jeff sealed his mouth to hers after reanointing every part of her body with that same mouth. And then, bringing himself up along the length of her, he united their two bodies.
An urgency mounted within him even though he managed to go slowly at first. That quickly evaporated as she moved beneath him, fanning his desires. Making him go faster and faster.
He seized the moment, driving her up further. He felt her nails digging into his back, heard her breathing growing more and more rapid. When she arched against him, uttering a muffled cry, he knew that they had reached the ultimate peak together.
When the explosion came, he clung to her and the moment, his heart pounding as hard as hers was. He could feel it against his chest. It blended with the sensation of the incredible rush that was passing over him, enfolding them both.
And though it seemed impossible, at that moment, he knew he was in love with her.
Chapter Sixteen
“That was incredible,” Jeff whispered. His breath ruffled her hair as Mikki lay with her head on his chest. “I have to admit, you turned out to be a complete surprise.”
Mikki raised her head and looked at him. “Why? What were you expecting?”
“Well—” he laughed softly, running his hand along her back, caressing her skin “—certainly not to have my shoes and socks blown off.”
“What shoes and socks? You were naked,” she pointed out with a grin.
“All the harder to do,” he replied, then laughed again. “I just want you to know that I had absolutely no intentions of that happening when I came over here tonight.”
“Are you apologizing or telling me that you’re having regrets?” Mikki asked him, drawing away and wondering just how she was going to execute a retreat at this point without feeling like
a complete idiot.
“Neither,” he answered, tightening his arm around her. “I just want you to know that I didn’t have any ulterior motives coming over.” Jeff played with the ends of her hair as he talked. “To be honest, I guess I was kind of in awe, watching you in action today, especially when you were with Henry. You’re really something, you know that?”
She shifted slightly, feeling somewhat self-conscious. Compliments had that effect on her. Especially in this situation. “You don’t have to say things like that after the fact.”
“After what fact?” Jeff asked her. With his forefinger, he raised her chin so he could look into her eyes.
“You know.” When he continued to look at her, obviously waiting for her to go on, she forced herself to explain. “I’m saying we’ve already made love—you don’t have to try to soften me up.”
Mystified, he told her, “I’m not trying to soften you up. I’m just telling you what I’m feeling right now. Just what kind of men have you been out with?”
“None,” she answered. And then, shrugging, she added, “Not in a very long, long time.”
“Then where’s this coming from?” he asked, wanting to know why she seemed so insecure. If anyone had a reason to be confident, it was Mikki. “A bad experience?”
She thought back to her first—and only—experience with a man. She’d been a sophomore in college and he was a TA. “Maybe,” she admitted. “A very long time ago. More like a mistake, really.”
Even though Jeff had a lot of questions he wanted to ask her, he knew it wasn’t his place to pry.
“Well,” Jeff began slowly, his voice soft, low and deliberately soothing, “I don’t know how you feel about what just happened, but for me, it definitely wasn’t a mistake.” Ever so lightly, he ran the back of his hand along her cheek, stirring her. Stirring himself. “On the contrary, it was as close to heaven as I’ve ever been.”
“Are you trying to seduce me?” Mikki asked incredulously.
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