by Rymer, Adair
Later at the apartment.
“Yeah, it's me.” I was already on the phone with my contact, Malcolm, when I closed the apartment door behind me. Romeo greeted me with a crazily wagging tail. I scratched under his chin. At least someone was happy to see me. “I need a fight.”
“That's what you said last time,” Malcolm grumbled. “I had to cancel last minute. You made me look like an asshole.”
“I had this family thing, but that's over now.” I fed Romeo “Are you going to hook me up or not?”
After a short silence, Malcolm replied. “Tonight, south central LA. But Arsen, listen to me, this one's no joke. It's going to be a glass fight.”
I frowned. That was the most dangerous of the blood sports. It was the only kind of fight that I'd actually seen men die in. I thought of Val. This time she chose her career and hollow lifestyle over me. If I didn't have her, then what did I truly have left to lose? “Sign me up.”
Val kept a pad of paper on the counter. I tore a page off and scrawled out some instructions for Romeo... just in case I never made it back from the fight to pick him up. Then I wrote down the address Malcolm gave me. When I ended the call, I put it into my phone's GPS.
And just like that, for the second time in my life, I walked away from the one person I loved the most.
Chapter 21
Valentine
Past
“Arsen is gone. You need to deal with that and move on.” My father snapped. I felt like hanging up on him right then, but of course I didn't. I stood on the balcony of my condo that overlooked the beach. It had been a few years since that perfect night where we had our own prom, but I still remembered every moment.
I missed Arsen every day. Why did he abandon me?
“Stop being so fickle, you need to start dating or the media will start to make assumptions.” I wish my father found me as many auditions as he did dates. Every time it was the same thing. Handsome, yet tame, upcoming celebrities, carefully picked for what they brought to the 'Dawson' brand.
I was so sick of it.
“I need to focus on my career right now.” That was always my go to excuse. It was also true, acting was the only thing that distracted me from Arsen. When I was acting I could become someone else, someone less broken inside.
“That's all well and good, but how you arrive is just as important as actually arriving. Remember that. Another thing, stop pursuing theater roles. We're a screen family, not a stage family.”
“But I like those roles. They're much more challenging for me than a Rom Com.” I especially loved the beauty, elegance and depth of Shakespeare. The darkness of his characters really called to me.
“Exactly. Valentine, that world is far more intricate than film. It will look horrible for us if you crack under that pressure. I have a limited reach there, and won't be able to make excuses for you. So get that silly notion right out of your head.”
As supportive as always. Thanks, dad.
“Alright.” I sighed. There was never any arguing with him, especially after the last time I disobeyed him to run off with Arsen. Nearly a full year passed, before he even let me go to any auditions. No Arsen, no acting and no real friends, that was the darkest time in my life.
My father was this domineering shadow that loomed over every decision I made, or had made for me. It made me miss Arsen that much more. I wish I remembered the exact words he used when he told my father off. That one night, I truly felt alive, like a bird released from a cage.
“That's a good girl.” My father talked at me until he was finished, then hung up. That's how most of these conversations went. I had grown so used to it, that it barely bothered me anymore.
All I wanted to do was watch the waves crash and drink champagne. Or rather, sparkling apple cider. The memory of the look on Arsen's face when he found out that it was nonalcoholic, made me smile. Then it made me break down into tears.
Present
“Your lunatic brother is banned from all production sets for the duration of filming!” Allen, the director was furious. He nervously glanced around. “He's not still here, is he?
“No, I asked him to leave.” I'd spent so much time wishing for Arsen to come back and now I’ve asked him to leave...
It only took a few minutes after Phillip was found by a production assistant for everything to go nuclear in the building. I knew that the producers and maybe even the police would be involved when Phillip recovered his faculties. It's why I didn't want Arsen to be on set, but I hated myself for telling him to leave. All he'd done was protect me. I felt horrible.
“Good!” Allen raised his voice, now that there was no fear of repercussion. “That man is neanderthal, what he did to poor Phillip!”
“Phillip,” is a spoiled, entitled child! I caught myself, swallowed my opinions and then continued. “Phillip will he be alright, he—”
“He's resting right now. His people are deciding what he feels fit for, but the filming day is ruined!” Allen became an animated parody of himself, his face reddened and his fists shook. “I knew Arsen was trouble the second I saw him!”
“With all due respect, Mr. Woodrow.” Arsen shouldn't have hit Phillip, but I refused to listen to him be insulted for coming to my aid. “Phillip crossed the line. He was aggressive and lewd and wouldn't keep his hands off me, despite me telling him several—”
“And we're lucky to have him! He's the most sought after young actor in the world right now. Any film he's in gets asses into seats, not to mention the academy nominations.” Allen talked down to me, shaking his head. I was getting real tired of being interrupted. “Let him do whatever he wants.”
“Excuse me?” I eyed the man.
“Valentine, you're a good actor.” Allen put a hand on my shoulder. It was probably supposed to be some sort of parental gesture, but it came off as incredibly creepy. “But that's not why you're here. You're here because Phillip wanted you. I suggest you start thinking about ways to make it up to him, if you want to stay on this project.”
There it was, all laid out. I was basically brought in to be a booty call for the lead actor. Arsen was right, they didn't value me at all. Was this really what I wanted, to be surrounded by sociopaths?
I felt so foolish. A good man had put a bad man down and I punished him for it. I was no better than them. I sent away the only man that really cared about me. I looked at the fake, practiced sympathy on Allen's face, and came to a long overdue realization.
Phillip was only a few years older than I was. Our fathers were both famous actors, we had a very similar background in most regards. It chilled me to think that if I didn't have Arsen keeping me grounded when I was younger, I might have grown up to be just like Phillip.
My time with Arsen in the past few months alone changed me, he'd reminded me who I really was and who I wanted to be. I had lost that for so long... I was searching for love and acknowledgment in all the wrong places.
I glanced at all the people still left on set, the ones that thought it was my fault for what happened to Phillip. I didn't need their respect, and I didn't want them as my peers.
“I know of one way to make it up to him,” I slapped the old man's hand from my shoulder. “How about I don't let the media know how small his dick is.” Allen's widening eyes looked gigantic behind his thick glasses. “Now if you'll excuse me, there is one man I need to go apologize to.”
I walked away from the stunned old man.
“Valentine, if you leave now—” The blustered director started.
“I quit, Allen.” It felt really good to interrupt a man like Allen Woodrow. Then I realized I had one last thing to say. “Also, go fuck yourself.”
Never in my life had I stood taller than when I walked out of that building. Allen and Phillip, just like my own father, were very powerful men in the industry. I'd probably never work in LA again, but that was fine. My naïve dream was over. That wasn't who I really was anyways, it's just a shame it took me so long to finally see that.
I held off on calling his phone until now, because I was hoping to apologize to him in person. Arsen's phone went right to voice mail, it was off. A pit formed in my stomach, I was starting to get really worried. He did say he wouldn't be there when I got back.
My heart began to race, what if he really was gone? Just like before. I didn't know if I could handle that again. I forced myself to push past the fear and the pain. We were adults now, we could figure this out.
I fell into the couch, trying to think of where he could have gone. Arsen didn't speak much of his time away these past few years, only that he was paid to fight. From the scars all over his body, I'd say that he got paid a lot. My throat went dry at the thought.
Did Arsen go off to fight?
Romeo jumped onto my lap. “O Romeo, Romeo,” I scratched both sides of the dog's face just how he liked it, his back leg started kicking. I was so hesitant about living with a dog at first, but now I couldn't imagine not coming home to our fluffy, pet monster. “Wherefore art thou, Arsen, boy? Huh?” I sighed. “You'd tell me if you could, wouldn't you?”
Romeo jumped off when I got up to grab some water for the desert in my throat. It was then that I noticed the note Arsen had written me. I was hoping that it was a message letting me know where he was, but it wasn't. It was just extensive instructions for Romeo. They were what you'd leave someone, if you weren’t ever coming back.
Now I was really nervous.
There were some indents in the pad of paper that the note came from. I figured Arsen wrote the note on that then tore it off, but when I looked a little closer the lines didn't match up. I grabbed a pencil from a nearby drawer and lightly colored in the small square of paper. In the negative I saw the words 'glass fight' and then an address.
What the hell was a glass fight?
I called my friend, Jeter, right away. Of course he wouldn't know anything about underground fighting, but he knew someone that did. After only a little delay, Jeter gave me the number of the bartender from the party that had recognized Arsen.
“A glass fight?” The bartender asked, when I managed to get him on the line. “Oh hell yeah, those are fucking crazy! The fighter's fists are wrapped in bandages, dipped in tar and then covered in broken glass. I'm telling you, it is insane.”
“Jesus...” I was horrified. This was what Arsen was going to do? How could he be that stupid! “That's barbaric, who would want to even see that?”
“You're fucking with me, right? Old, bored, rich guys 'love' that shit. They think it's like the gladiator times, or some shit. A good fight to the death never goes out of style.”
No, I guess not.
I thanked the bartender, then rushed out the door. If I called the police, then they would definitely arrest Arsen for participating. I had no idea what to do. I just knew I had to get there.
I couldn't lose him again.
Chapter 22
Arsen
Past
“I don't know how the hell you did it, but damn, Arsenal!” Malcolm slapped the stack of hundreds into my hand. I was a bloody mess, but it still felt good to vent my pent-up anger.
I shrugged, counting out the money from my first fight. I couldn't wait to get out of that grungy-ass warehouse and get something to eat. It'd been a few days since I could afford any food. I didn't know how I won either, my opponent was this beefy Russian guy. He had nearly a foot on me.
When things got really bad in there, I glanced at the crowd and imagined that Val was watching. She'd always been my good luck charm in high school, so why not now too? Even back then it wasn't luck. I just fought harder when I knew she was watching.
I gently pulled the shoelace necklace over my head, the heart-shaped pendant was back against my own heart, where it belonged. I still wasn't sure if I had been trying to impress her, or if having her around just brought that never-give-up determination out of me. I guess it didn't really matter.
I missed her all the same.
“If that really was your first fight, then you and me are gonna make a lot of fucking money together, man!” Malcolm was Nigerian with a heavy accent, in his mid forties. He had a serious limp from when he was a fighter himself. Now he was a just a promoter and negotiator, but he was the best in the underground circuit. He knew everybody.
In a fucked up way, I guess you could say he was my agent. That immediately made me think of Val. On my way to the fight, I passed a poster for her debut movie. I told myself I wouldn't see it because it'd be too painful, but it was Val...
How could I not?
When Malcolm went off to set up the next fight, I took the opportunity to slip out the back and into the alley. The August air was bitter in Pittsburgh. I pulled my hood up to protect my bruised skin from the dirty, city rain.
Making sure I was alone, I stuffed two hundred dollars of my winnings into my boxers. It was a habit I'd picked up during this last, hard year. My plan had always been the same, just 'keep going.' If I ever stopped, the way I'd been living might catch up. I didn't want to be around when that day came.
In the dark, late night hours, my mind always drifted back to Val. This was the right decision, wasn't it? I looked down at my sore bandaged hands and knew the answer. I hated to admit that Hugh was right about anything, but he was right about me. What could I offer her that was better than the life she'd have without me?
Vivid flashes of her lingered in my heart. The way she used to smell, the sound of her voice, all of it hit harder than any punch. Moments like these were the worst, it was getting more and more difficult lately to fight back the tears of missing her.
“That's him,” I heard whispered behind me. I'd expected some fans to come up and congratulate me on the fight, but I was too wrapped up in my own pain to face them. Scuffling feet became a charge and before I could turn around there was a loud crack. Then there was nothing at all.
The relentless rain woke me up sometime later. I was soaked through, lying in a bloody puddle next to a dumpster, like all the other discarded alley trash. My head rang so fucking loud that every attempt to get back on my feet ended with me crashing back down against the dumpster.
I didn't even bother checking for the cash in my pocket. I knew wasn't there. I only had one possession that mattered. I rolled onto my back and slid a filthy, shaking hand over my chest. As hungry as I was, I didn't care about the money. It was the heart pendant that they had stolen from me, that hurt the most.
Alone, and left for dead, I let unconsciousness take me.
'Get up!' I heard Val's voice scream in my memory. When I opened my eyes, lightning crashed overhead, and in the afterglow, I could swear I saw Val's icy blue eyes. I felt like I was in the ring again, getting my ass kicked.
She was watching me, I couldn't give up now.
It was impossible, of course. Val was safely sheltered away in some multimillion dollar mansion somewhere. But that didn't stop the familiar surge of strength I felt whenever she used to watch me wrestle. I put one leg in front of the other and finally managed to get to my feet.
I survived another night because of her.
The flickering, red-neon window lights of a sketchy late night tattoo parlor blinked a few streets over. Starving and probably in need of some real medical attention, I stumbled, almost drunkenly, toward the building. Only one thing mattered to me at that moment. I pulled my last two hundred dollars from my boxers and shoved open the heavy reinforced door.
“Jesus, kid! The fuck happened to you?” The lone tattoo artist asked me.
“Some thugs stole something very important, I need you to give it back to me.”
Present
This didn't feel good anymore. The screaming crowd, the pain that always helped me forget and escape, no longer felt right.
The hastily rigged up halogen lights and the
circle drawn on the broken cement floor made the warehouse basement seem more like a construction site than any kind of boxing ring. Malcolm, surrounded by two girls in bikinis, made his way through the fifty or so business men. He barked at them for last minute bets, and was eventually cut off by the air horn that signified the start of the match.
I shrugged off my hoodie, cracked my neck one last time and felt a calm wash over me. Balling my hands into fists, bits of glass flaked off my tar-covered knuckles and peppered my boots. I was ready.
The whole place vibrated with bloodthirsty energy, if it could talk it would say, This is where you really belong. Welcome home, Arsen.
My opponent moved in on me, testing my reactions with some super quick jabs. He was a lean, black kid with a long reach, and he was much faster than I was. Every other strike from him connected. Most were just glancing blows at best, but the glass on his fists got my blood flowing.
A few seconds in, I was already bleeding up and down my arms and I had yet to even tag this kid. The old men cheered at every new cut and narrow dodge. I wasn't going to win if I played the long game. I was stronger and thicker than he was. And I could take one hell of a beating.
I stepped toward him, absorbing half a dozen blows that would have been devastating to other men. I pushed him to the edge of the chalk circle, the large men that walked on the outside of that perimeter pushed him back toward me.
I took two more hard shots to the ribs, ducked under a right cross and came up with an uppercut. One solid hit was all it took to knock the kid on his ass. He staggered, landing upright in a sitting, crossed-leg position.
