“And poor Hope was probably devastated to have to give up the life of luxury and ease you had so generously bestowed upon her.”
Noelle had had enough, “Stop that! You are talking about her as if she’s some cold-hearted, gold-digging wretch.”
He looked at her, one eyebrow raised insolently, “Isn’t she, aren’t all women?”
“No, I mean I can’t speak for all women but I can speak for her. You’re acting as if she jumped at the opportunity to take on the role of lady and it was actually quite the opposite. I had to force her, almost threaten her to do me the favor. I knew I couldn’t just leave my family with the scandal my absence would’ve created so I convinced her to take my place. She never wanted any of it, the dresses, the balls, you.”
For one blessed second, the insolence was wiped from his face so she took that for a good sign and continued, “I thought she’d be relieved when I came back to reclaim my life. I honestly would never have thought that something would’ve developed between the two of you, that you could have feelings for one another.”
“No, it’s apparent that you don’t think much when making your decisions. I on the other hand have some thinking to do and it would be best if you left. I’ll have my driver take you home and in the meantime I’ll try to figure out a way out of this marriage. If there’s one thing I do know, it’s that I will never, never marry you.”
***
Pierce had spent the last two days moping around his house, refusing to leave the premises and refusing to accept any callers. He felt despondent in a way that he hadn’t felt in his entire life. He despaired when he thought of the future and what his life would be like without Hope. It still felt odd calling her that. Part of him was fiercely angry at the situation, at her for her perfidy. He couldn’t help but wonder what else was a lie between them and how much he really did know about her.
Whenever he thought of the real Noelle his stomach turned sour and he wanted to hit something. He kept trying to contrive ways out of their engagement that wouldn’t make him look the fool. He knew that if a man were to cry off it could very well destroy the lady’s reputation beyond repair. Why he cared about Noelle’s reputation was beyond him, but he wanted to find a way out of the marriage with as little scandal as possible but he knew that now that the bann’s had been read that would be next to impossible. He entertained the idea of fleeing the continent. He could admit to himself that this desire to flee had crept into his thoughts a few too many times where Noelle Parrish was concerned but it was the only plausible and somewhat satisfying answer he had come up with yet.
He looked up from his desk as he heard his butler enter the study. “Your grace, you’ve a visitor.”
“I said I wasn’t seeing anyone.”
“As you wish your grace,” but just as his butler bowed his head and turned to leave, Elliot marched through the door.
“I had a feeling you’d try to turn me away. Enough of this hiding, I haven’t seen you at White’s for days.”
Pierce shrugged his shoulders, “I haven’t been feeling very social.”
Elliot walked over and poured himself a brandy before coming to sit in the chair across from Pierce’s desk. He noted the shadow of stubble on his friends face and the tired look in his eyes. His attire was unusually unkempt and his hair looked as if it hadn’t been combed in days.
“I’m afraid to be the bearer of bad news, but you my friend, have seen better days.”
“Please accept my apologies; I hadn’t planned on entertaining today so I’m sorry if my appearance offends you.”
Elliot leaned forward and placed his glass on the desk, “What’s wrong with you man? Has the magic of love already faded between you and Noelle?”
“She’s not my fiancée, I’m not marrying the chit.”
“What?! Are you serious? Have you finally decided to take my advice and cry off?”
“No, I mean it literally—that woman is not the girl I was going to marry.”
“You mean she’s not acting like the girl you thought you were going to marry, right?”
“No, I mean that it’s not her.”
Elliot eyed him quizzically, “I think you better explain yourself.”
Taking a deep breath, Pierce pushed his chair back from the desk and propped his booted feet on his desk, both hands clasped behind his head as he began to recount the story.
When he had finally finished explaining the tale Elliot had sprung to his feet and leaned over-animatedly across the desk attempting to get as close to his face as was possible, “Why the devil are you sitting here brooding when you should be out looking for the woman you love? I can guarantee you that if I thought even for a minute that I had a chance to find my love that I would be doing everything within my power to search her out and bring her back.”
Pierce lowered both feet to the ground, shocked by the emotional outburst of his friend. He had never seen him so incensed. “Oh like you did with Felicity?”
Elliot’s voice turned cold and menacing, “You know that I did everything I could to find her, I searched everywhere.” Pierce instantly regretted asking when he saw the haunted look that flitted through his friends icy eyes and realized that he was being unfair. He remembered vividly the tortured weeks and months after Felicity’s mysterious disappearance when Elliot had spent days searching out any lead he could find that might possibly give him a clue as to where she had gone. He had left no rock unturned in his search for her and had never been the same when he failed to discover her whereabouts.
“This is different,” Pierce reasoned.
“You’re right, it is different. It’s different because you’re different. I wouldn’t be so foolish to the let the best thing that had happened to me slip away without a fight. At least I had the gumption and the conviction to search for who I loved. At least I can feel peace knowing I did everything I could to find her.”
“Is that what you’ve felt all these years, peaceful?”
“Lud no!” Elliot exclaimed, “But imagine how much worse I would feel if I hadn’t done anything. You’re a bigger fool than I thought if you won’t even bother putting up a fight. People like you don’t deserve the love of a good woman. I would give up everything that I have just to spend one more day with Felicity.” He scrutinized Pierce one final time before turning and making his exit before his uncontrolled emotions could embarrass him any further.
Chapter 24
Despite Elliot having called him a fool, Pierce didn’t feel like one at all. He may be foolish at times but he wasn’t consumed with stupidity like most men of his sex. At least that’s what he kept telling himself as feelings of foolishness washed over him in waves. The loss he felt was akin to losing a limb, only worse. At least when one lost a limb, one could eventually adapt to the loss but Pierce knew that he would never be able to adapt to the loss of Hope.
When thinking of his future only brought more misery and visions of endless years of loneliness and heartache he decided that he had to do something. He couldn’t bear the thought of never seeing Hope again, if nothing he at least had some questions that he needed answered. He quickly instructed Tucker to pack his bags as he made arrangements to go after Hope.
His first stop was at the Brattondale’s residence. He pulled his watch fob out and glanced at his timepiece noting it was rather late in the evening. Most likely the Brattondale’s would be at some society function but he silently prayed that that wouldn’t be the case. When their butler let him in he handed him his card and was relieved when he was told that Noelle was in. He was shown to the drawing room to await her presence.
When Noelle finally arrived, Pierce rose, not even bothering with formalities, “Where did Hope go, how can I find her?”
“You’re going to go to her?” Noelle asked, surprisingly pleased by this.
“Just tell me where I can find her, there are some things I need to say to her.”
“She told me she was going back to Shepard’s Bush to stay with her m
other.”
“Do you recall her mother’s name?”
Noelle tapped one finger against her chin, “Let me see if I can recall…Martha? No…Marianne? That doesn’t sound right…ah ha! It’s Matilde!” She was pleased that she could recall the name and hoped with everything in her that the duke would be able to find her, if only to keep her from marrying him and spending her life locked in a miserable marriage with a man that despised her.
Without any further conversation, not even a thank you, Pierce was off practically jogging to his carriage so he could be on his way. He was grateful beyond relief to know that he wouldn’t have to journey far to find her. He still wasn’t completely sure what he was going to do or say once he found her—he desperately wanted to believe that she hadn’t been like Eliza and was only after him for his title and wealth. He thought back to her actions and their conversations and he had to admit that that description didn’t fit the girl he had come to know and love. Hadn’t she been appalled when he told her of Eliza’s reasons for wanting to marry him? He remembered Noelle’s conviction that she hadn’t really wanted to participate in the charade but that Noelle had practically had to force her to do it. Maybe he could scratch that concern off of his list.
That still left him with a few other concerns, like the fact that he was engaged to Noelle Parrish and that the banns had already been read, or the fact that Hope was merely a servant girl, not someone who he could acceptably marry. He laid his head back against the plush seats of his carriage and closed his eyes and groaned. The situation seemed impossible and the more he thought about it the more it frustrated him. He must’ve dozed off for a bit because the next thing he remembered was waking slowly as he realized the carriage was slowing as they entered Shepard’s Bush. He looked around at the sparse houses and figured it shouldn’t be too hard to find the Hillburn’s residence. He reached up and tapped on the ceiling indicating his driver to stop.
Pierce jumped out of the carriage at the first house they came to, knowing he probably appeared crazy calling on strangers at such a late hour in the evening but now that he was so close to her nothing was going to stop him. He knocked on the door and cringed as he felt the first drops of rainfall pour down from the ominous looking sky. He reached up and pounded once more on the door, impatient to get out of the rain.
When the door finally opened a burly man appeared with a leery look on his face, “Can I help you sir?”
“Yes, at least I hope so. I’m looking for Matilde Hillburn, can you direct me to her house?”
The man’s face instantly turned sorrowful, “I’m afraid you’re too late.”
“Too late? Has she moved?”
“Alas she has, right up to heaven to be with the angels. She passed on a fortnight ago.”
Pierce’s heart ached for Hope and her loss. “Do you know what has happened to her daughter Hope?”
The man shook his thick head, causing his double chin to wobble back and forth, “I haven’t seen the lass for years in all honestly, last I had heard she had gotten a post with some fancy lady, daughter of an earl I believe.”
“Does she have any other family around these parts or anywhere else that you are aware of?”
“Why are you asking? Is she in some kind of trouble?” The man was beginning to get suspicious.
“No, no, she’s just—an old friend of mine and I was hoping to catch up with her on my way through.”
“Oh, in that case nay, she had no family besides her mother, God rest her soul.”
Pierce tried not to let his frustration show, “Well thank you sir for your help.”
By the time Pierce was back inside his carriage he was soaked through almost to the skin. His dark hair was dripping rain onto his face and down his nose. He didn’t even bother reaching up to wipe it away, instead he instructed his driver to continue on. He wasn’t sure what his next move would be, the only lead he had had gone cold and he was at a loss for where she could’ve gone with no family to turn to.
A few miles down the road Pierce spotted an inn and quickly tapped on the ceiling. The thought of a warm fire and a mug of ale was too tempting to pass up. He was freezing cold in his wet clothes and figured a drink in front of a fire was just what he needed as he planned his next move in his search for Hope.
The warmth of the inn enveloped him the minute he walked through its doors. He was greeted by a slender middle aged man with little hair remaining on his pointy head. “Can I help you? Would you like a room?”
“Thanks but no, I’m just passing through and was hoping to get a mug of ale and warm myself by the fire for a time.”
“Maggie will take care of you.” Just then a plump red-headed serving girl sidled up to Pierce, her unwashed body pressed too close for comfort. He gave her an unsure smile before indicating he’d like the table closest to the hearth and a mug of ale.
The girl, Maggie, leaned in close, “Are you sure that’s all I can get you milord?” she asked flirtatiously.
“Quite, thank you.” He turned and stalked off to his table missing completely the pout that overcame her face at his dismissal.
It was a rare thing for Maggie to be dismissed so easily. The gentlemen that came through didn’t always take her up on her offer of sharing their bed but they at least had the courtesy to flirt with and compliment her. This man had done neither and it irked her. She huffed back into the kitchen and turned to the new girl that had been hired to clean and clear tables in between cleaning the rooms they let out as well as scrubbing the chamber pots, “Take this mug out to the man by the fire, I want nothing to do with the likes of him.”
The girl turned and gingerly grabbed the mug, struggling not to roll her eyes at Maggie’s tantrum. In the short time she had known her she knew she could be moody and temperamental especially where men were concerned. Turning, she used her shoulder to open the door and began walking towards the fireplace. She saw the man sitting, his back to her as he warmed his hands before the fire. His shoulders were broad and his dark hair appeared wet, as well as his clothes that were plastered to his well sculpted body. As she drew nearer she exhaled the breath she hadn’t realized she had been holding. She moved silently across the floor, balancing the mug in her small hand but somehow the man still sensed her presence. He turned when she was just a few steps away from him and she gasped, almost letting the mug of ale drop to the floor.
Pierce inhaled sharply as he looked into familiar amber eyes that haunted his dreams. “Noelle?” he managed to squeak out. He watched as she quickly slammed the mug of ale down on the table causing the frothy liquid to splash down the sides of the mug and onto the table then turned and practically started running back towards the kitchen.
He watched her retreating form in shock, goodness she was so beautiful. He stood and in a few long paces he was directly behind her, realizing he had called her the wrong name he tried again, “Hope?”
He watched as her shoulders stiffened, but at least she had stopped running from him. Hope closed her eyes, she had thought she’d never see Pierce again but here he was in the flesh, even more handsome than she remembered. She longed to turn around and throw herself into his arms and beg him to take her away, to still love her but she knew she couldn’t do that. He was engaged to Noelle, possibly even married to her by now. The thought made her heart break in pieces all over again.
She had thought that her heart couldn’t break any further when she had been forced to flee London after Noelle’s return, but upon her arrival in Shepard’s Bush she had learned that her mother had passed away and her grief felt insurmountable. She had been forced to find work quickly to provide food and shelter for herself and the inn had proved a perfect fit. She had thought to provide a new life for herself where she could work long, dreary hours and put her past completely behind her. She never for a minute thought that the past would find her there.
She couldn’t bring herself to turn and look into Pierce’s face. She knew if she did, she’d be lost so instead she kept
her back turned to him, her eyes averted. “Why are you here?”
“I came to find you, I have so many questions. Will you please at least look at me?”
When it became clear that she wasn’t going to turn, Pierce walked in front of her and gently cupped her chin in his hand and raised her face to meet his, “I know who you really are.”
“So you know that I’m merely a low class servant?” She desperately wanted him to tell her that it didn’t matter, that he had come to marry her anyway but the look on his face told her that he wouldn’t. Instead he merely nodded. Adopting a business like tone to mask the crushing pain she said, “You said you had so many questions and you’ve yet to ask a single one. I must get back to work so please be brief.”
Pierce cleared his throat, “Why did you do it?”
“I had to, I had no other option. Well I suppose I did but that would’ve left Lord Brattondale and his family in disgrace and I felt that burden rested solely on my shoulders. I begged Noelle to stay but she’s impetuous and wouldn’t listen. I’m so sorry for the shame I must’ve caused you.”
Pierce was astounded; he couldn’t believe she was apologizing to him, if anything Noelle was the one who should be apologizing for putting them both in this impossible position. He heard the tremble of emotion in her voice though she tried to remain strong and he ached to reach out and pull her into his chest, to stroke her hair and to tell her he would make everything alright, the problem was he couldn’t make that promise, he had yet to figure out a solution and couldn’t guarantee he could fix the dilemma. He had never felt so helpless.
Despite the fact that he couldn’t offer her anything he was just about to pull her into his arms anyway when they were both startled by loud pair of footsteps echoing off of the wood floor. They both turned in unison to see who had interrupted their solitude when the man in question came to a sudden halt. He was weary and pale and the sight of them seemed to put him into a shock, his mouth falling open and his eyes widening.
Deceiving the Duke of Kerrington (Ladies of Deception) Page 18
