Every Beat of My Heart

by Kianna Alexander

  “How are things at the courthouse?” She closed the magazine and tucked it into her purse.

  “We’re still waiting for word from the higher-ups at county about the cutbacks, so things are a little tense. Other than that, it’s business as usual.”

  The waitress, wearing a uniform of a black skirt, white blouse and red-and-white-checked apron, approached the table. “Welcome, what can I get you?”

  Lina ordered first. “I’ll have the eggplant parmesan lunch special and a lemonade, please.”

  The waitress turned to him. “And you, sir?”

  “I’ll have the—”

  Before he could finish his order, the waitress’s eyes went so wide and round they resembled two full moons. She squealed, and then shouted, “Aren’t you Rashad MacRae? From the Queen City Gents?”

  He cleared his throat, a little taken aback by her excitement. He stuck out his hand, as he usually did when a fan of the band approached him. “Yes, I am. What’s your name, miss?”

  She grasped his outstretched hand, her smile brightening. “I’m Chelsea. Oh my God. My friends and I come to your shows almost every week. They are never going to believe I met you!”

  “That’s always good to hear. Thanks for supporting us.” He offered the young waitress a friendly smile, even as he felt the coolness rolling off Lina’s body like an incoming snowstorm.

  A squeal of delight escaped Chelsea’s mouth. She reached into her apron pocket and pulled out a small notebook with a floral patterned cover. Opening the pad, she held it out along with her pen. “Would you please sign this for me?”

  He hazarded a quick glance at Lina, who was making a show of reading her magazine with rapt interest. Her irritation was easy to detect from the tightness of her face and the way her eyes darted rapidly across the pages. Resisting the urge to chuckle, he took the items from Chelsea and signed her book as she’d asked.

  As he handed the book back to her, she hugged it against her chest for a moment, her broad smile a testament to her level of excitement. After taking a few deep breaths, she switched back to her order pad. “What can I get for you?”

  “I’ll have the vegetarian manicotti lunch special and a mineral water, please.”

  “No problem. It’ll be right out.” Chelsea, having jotted his order down, turned and moved toward the kitchen.

  After the waitress’s departure, he turned his gaze back on his sullen date, who was still pretending to pore over her open magazine. “Lina.”

  She looked up when he called her name. “Yes?”

  “Is there a problem?”

  She pursed her lips for a moment, and then stated simply, “No.”

  His eyebrow hitched. Did she really think he hadn’t noticed her frosty demeanor toward the waitress? He folded his arms over his chest, watching her, and waited.

  A few silent moments later, she took the bait. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

  “I couldn’t help noticing how your attitude changed once the waitress started talking about being a fan of the band.”

  Her tawny eyes widened, then rolled dramatically. “I didn’t say anything to her, Rashad.”

  “I know. But you didn’t look particularly happy about it, either.”

  “I didn’t realize I was supposed to jump for joy whenever one of your little groupies starts fangirling over you.”

  He groaned. “Lina—”

  She put up her open palm, signaling that she didn’t want to hear any more. “Look, I’d really like to finish this article I’m reading, if you don’t mind. You can lecture me later.”

  He shook his head. She had to be the most stubborn, headstrong woman he’d ever had the pleasure of tangling with, and he wouldn’t change that for the world. “Fine, I’ll keep quiet—for now.”

  She cut him a censuring look, then let her gaze drop back to the magazine.

  Chelsea returned with their drinks, but didn’t linger. Rashad figured she sensed the tension at the table. He was scrolling through his phone while his tight-lipped companion read from her magazine.

  Just about the time he began to worry that Lina could hear his stomach’s growling demands for food, Chelsea approached the table with their two steaming plates. When she’d set the food before them and made sure they didn’t need anything else, she made herself scarce.

  At this point he was too famished to argue with Lina, but as he dug into his manicotti, he vowed to set her straight once his hunger was allayed. They ate in relative silence, except for a few comments about how good the food tasted.

  Once they’d finished, he paid their check and stood from his seat. Rounding the table to where she sat, he pulled out her chair. She got up, gathered her purse, her phone and the magazine, and the two of them left the restaurant.

  Outside on the sidewalk, they walked side by side. A good number of people were out walking their dogs, going in and out of shops, or returning to work from their lunch breaks. Clouds were beginning to gather, signaling one of the pop-up afternoon thunderstorms so common during a North Carolina summer. The softly blowing breeze carried the scent of incoming rain.

  He reached for her hand, but the rolled up magazine she clutched stopped him from grasping it. Having had enough of her funky attitude, he stopped midstep. Placing a gentle hold on her arm, he moved them both to the right to get out of the way of the other foot traffic. There, under the red-and-white-striped awning that sheltered the entrance of a candy shop, he used his fingertips to tilt her chin so he could look into her eyes.

  “Baby, what is bothering you?”

  The remnants of a frown remained on her face. “Rashad, not now.”

  “Yes, now.”

  “But—”

  He smothered her protests by placing his lips to hers. Her soft mouth yielded to his, and he tasted a hint of fruity sweetness there—a combination of the lemonade she’d been drinking and the berry flavored gloss on her lips. He lingered there, his tongue plumbing the depths of her mouth until she gave a muffled moan. Only then did he release her.

  Her cheeks were tinted with red, and she seemed flustered. “You can’t just kiss me like that in public.”

  “Why not?”

  In response, her cheeks reddened even more.

  “Well, I’ve got bad news for you, baby. Either tell me what’s wrong, or I’m going to keep kissing you just like that, for everyone to see.”

  She blinked several times. “You’d make me late for work.”

  “Damn straight.”

  Her head dropped back with a dramatic sigh. “Fine. I’m not so thrilled about the groupies, I never was. I get that it comes with the territory of being in a band, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

  He placed his open palms on her shoulders, running his hands up and down the length of her bare arms. “Lina. No matter how many women come up to me, you’re the only one I want.”

  Her eyes softened. “So you say.”

  “So I mean. You’ve got to trust me, baby. It’s the only way this thing between us is going to work out.”

  She tilted her head to the side, a small smile lifting the corners of her mouth. “Make me believe you.”

  So he gathered her into his arms, and beneath the shadow of the awning, kissed her with all the passion he had inside.

  Chapter 7

  Back at the law office, Lina knew she was dangerously close to being late for what her boss had described as a very important office meeting. Taking in her reflection in the ladies’ room mirror, she sighed at her disheveled state. The impromptu post-lunch make out session with Rashad had not only left her breathless, she now resembled a teenager sneaking in after a late-night tryst. Shaking her head, she set out to fix what Rashad had messed up.

  While she worked on getting herself together, her mind
replayed those torrid moments under the candy store awning. She recalled the softness of his lips, the sensual stroking of his tongue inside her mouth, the arousing way he’d cupped her hip with his big hand. His skillful, possessive kisses had almost made her forget that they were kissing on the streets of downtown Charlotte in broad daylight. She chuckled to herself.

  He sure knows how to get his point across.

  After she’d corrected her smudged lip gloss, runny mascara and mussed hair, she popped a mint into her mouth. Then she slung the strap of her handbag over her shoulder and walked out into the corridor.

  She entered the boardroom a few moments later. She greeted her colleagues, most of whom were already present, and took her usual seat on the right side of the rectangular table, toward the center. Lerner was one of the smaller firms in the area, with a total of twenty-one people on staff, and Lina had been at the firm long enough to have established a professional relationship with most of them. She didn’t know the five members of the secretarial staff all that well, but that was due to high turnover in their department.

  At present, only two seats remained empty now, the one across from her belonging to Tara Mitchell, and the one at the head of the table where Mrs. Lerner sat. Lina had just enough time to settle into her seat, open her briefcase and take out a legal pad and pen before the two missing associates entered the room and took their respective seats.

  Mrs. Lerner called the meeting to order, then passed the reigns over to her administrative assistant to go over the case files from the previous week. Lina listened intently, making a note of each case number, the attorney who’d handled it, and the outcome, even though she knew a dossier of this information would be distributed at the end of the month. Keeping good notes was simply her way of keeping her mind sharp during each meeting which, at times, were incredibly boring. She continued taking notes through most of the meeting, filling five of the sheets on her lavender-tinted legal pad. The sound of Mrs. Lerner clearing her throat made her set the pen aside and look up.

  “Now let’s move on to some exciting news. I want to congratulate the two junior partners who are being promoted to senior partners, effective in two weeks.”

  Lina looked around the room.

  She didn’t have to wait long before Mrs. Lerner spoke again.

  “Some say I rarely smile, but I’m very proud of the efforts of these two women, who are assets to our firm. Please join me in applauding Lina Smith-Todd and Tara Mitchell.”

  Lina stood and looked across the table to the beaming Tara, who also stood. As their coworkers feted them with clapping and cheers, Lina felt the pride swelling in her chest. This was the moment she’d been waiting for. The moment when the all-nighters she’d pulled in undergrad and in law school, the long hours poring over law texts and depositions, and the social life she’d all but abandoned finally paid off.

  Yes, this was a game changer. Making senior partner in a respected law firm as a black woman under forty was no small feat, and she planned to celebrate this accomplishment to the fullest. Part of that celebration would be to purchase Thelonious Monk’s baby grand, and revel in the look of utter joy the piano would surely put on her mother’s face.

  The applause tapered off as Mrs. Lerner gestured for everyone’s attention. “That’s it for today, people. Let’s get back to work. We’ll celebrate with a little cake at lunch time.”

  As the group began to disperse, Lina took a moment to walk over to Tara and shake her hand. “Congratulations, Tara.”

  Tara, a forty-something mother of two grown sons, smiled in response. “Thanks, Lina. Congratulations to you, as well.”

  They chatted for a few moments while Tara gathered her things, and then the two of them strolled toward the door.

  Mrs. Lerner stopped Lina.

  With a wave, Tara disappeared from the room.

  The lead attorney addressed her. “Lina, I want to talk to you a moment. I’m having my assistant place the order today for updated signage and stationery for the firm. What’s the situation with your name?”

  She didn’t hesitate. “I’m coming in late tomorrow morning because I’m going to the courthouse first thing to drop my ex-husband’s name.” Sure, Warren had helped finance her first year of law school, but that didn’t negate his numerous infidelities. She was stepping into a new season of her life, and she refused to do so while still carrying the burden of his last name.

  “Very good. I don’t want to hold up the printing process, so I’ll tell my assistant to have everything printed up with ‘Lerner, Mitchell and Smith.’ Just be sure to bring me a copy of your name-change paperwork when you come in tomorrow.”

  “No problem.” Lina shook hands with her boss and exited the boardroom.

  As she walked down the corridor toward her office, her phone chimed, signaling an incoming text message. She grabbed the knob on her office door and twisted, pushing it open. Inside, she moved over to the desk, set her purse down on top, and fished the phone out of it. She unlocked the touch screen. A smile touched her lips when she saw the message was from Rashad.

  I’m having a HARD time concentrating this afternoon.

  Her smile widened as she typed her reply.

  You’re the one who decided to make your point with kisses.

  She set the phone down on the edge of the desk, but before she could walk away it chimed again with his reply.

  You know you liked it, baby.

  Shaking her head, she sent him back a winky face emoji and tucked her phone away. If they kept this up, neither of them would get any work done. She hoped he’d go back to whatever he’d been doing, to keep her whole afternoon from being mired in distraction.

  He didn’t text her again, but the memory of his soft lips and the feeling of his hands on her body still lingered in her mind for the rest of the afternoon.

  * * *

  As the end of the workday drew near on Wednesday, Rashad found himself wringing his hands. It wasn’t something he did often, but his nerves were frazzled, and for good reason. In less than fifteen minutes, there would be an end-of-day departmental meeting for the register of deeds office. And he knew that during that meeting, he’d have to do the very thing he’d been dreading since this most recent round of budget cuts had been announced: tell someone they were out of a job.

  Draining the cup of cold water he’d gotten from the cooler, he sighed. He’d been raised with a very strong work ethic, as well as a sense of responsibility to give to others. Still, there were not many people in the world who demonstrated the high level of commitment, self-sacrifice, and professionalism that his family demanded from him. Rick Havens was one of those rare people, and the prospect of having to tell the older man he’d be losing his job in two weeks made Rashad feel like shit.

  He stood from his seat behind the desk, straightened his tie and left his office. As he strode down the corridor toward the conference room, he truly wished Gary were there to do this decidedly dirty work. His boss had left earlier to accompany his mother-in-law to a follow-up appointment. Being the most senior employee present that afternoon meant he’d drawn the short straw.

  Inside the conference room, most of the staff was already seated around the long rectangular table. As Rashad took his seat at the head, he took in the faces of his colleagues. They were all good people, and most were hard workers. Sure, Claudia was the office gossip who always had her ears open to everyone’s conversations, and Maynard—who hadn’t yet arrived—was habitually five or ten minutes late to everything. But those things were pretty minor. As a supervisor, Rashad wasn’t one to demand perfection from his staff. All he wanted was for them to do their jobs to the best of their abilities and nine and a half times out of ten, they delivered.

  By the time five o’clock rolled around everyone was present. Rashad then stood and cleared his throat. “I’m going to be brief, since I
know we’d all like to get home. Gary has informed me that the county is ready to begin the first round of staff cuts. It’s not just us, this same speech is being given in several other departments in the courthouse today.”

  A collective groan rose from the people sitting around the table.

  Rashad nodded. “I know, I’m not happy about this, either. But as I’m told we have no choice. For right now, our office only has to cut two positions, and fortunately we’re able to give two weeks’ notice and one month’s severance pay.”

  For the rest of the meeting, Rashad outlined some of the changes that would take place around the office. Budget-cutting measures were being put in place, such as transitioning to a mostly paperless office, and cutting back on overtime.

  Rashad leaned his back against the whitewashed wall and took a few questions from his employees. Most wanted to know if and when more cuts would be made. Unfortunately, that wasn’t something he had a ready answer for. Information was being funneled to him through Gary, who was getting it from the suits at county in snatches.

  After the meeting was adjourned, he asked two of his employees to stay behind.

  Rick Havens stood from his seat, making eye contact with him. “Let me guess. You’re about to tell me I’m officially retired.”

  Even as he wished things could be different, Rashad offered a solemn nod. “I’m sorry, Rick. But I still have two weeks to figure something out for you, and I plan to keep my promise.”

  Rick responded with a solemn nod. “Let me know what you come up with, Mac.”

  Rashad’s eyes fell on Nathan, the office’s young courier. “Sorry, Nate. We’re going to have to cut your position as well.”

  The cocky young brother responded with a chuckle. “It’s all good, boss man. I’m about to get my degree in December, so I’ll be all right.”

  “I respect your positive outlook, Nate.”

  Within the next half hour, Rashad locked the door to the empty conference room and returned to his office. As was often the case, he was the last person remaining in the office. It was just after 6 p.m., and he didn’t want to linger any longer. Once he’d gathered his belongings, he left, locking the main office door behind him.