Chapter Thirty-Three
ALEX, THE LAST PERSON she had expected to see, was standing before her. Okay, in truth, he was the last person she had wanted to see. Not now, not when she only had a day or so left. He didn’t belong here.
“Babe, why haven’t you replied to my texts? Answered my calls?”
His use of the word babe, a term of endearment he tended to favor, made her shudder. Normally, she didn’t mind it, but instead of affectionate, it sounded creepy to her ears somehow, unpleasant.
“I’ve been busy, that’s all,” she said, trying not to snap. “Come on, let’s go.”
“Go where?” he asked, trailing behind her.
“To the pub.”
In the pub she wouldn’t have to talk to him, not in earnest anyway. It would give her time to think, decide what she was going to do next.
She led him round the fringes of the interior where the crowds were at their thinnest until they reached the bar, the opposite side of the bar to where Joseph stood talking to a much bigger group of people this time, although Clare and her giggly friends were still a part of it.
Joseph hadn’t spotted them yet, but he would. It was just a matter of time. What he would make of them when he did, she didn’t know. Then again she didn’t know what to make of him and Clare, so they had that in common, at least. Briefly she looked around for Hannah and Jim, wondering if Hannah had put him straight about all this leaving business, but it was no good; she could barely see past the people in front of her.
Before she could order another drink, Alex grabbed her by the elbow, forcing her to turn round and look at him. “What do you mean you’ve been busy? That’s no excuse.”
“It is,” she shot back. “My mother showed up unexpectedly and then Penny. I’ve barely had a moment to breathe.”
“I’ve been worried,” he said, and there was indeed genuine concern in his eyes. “I thought something might have happened to you. That’s why I’m here. To make sure you’re okay.”
“Yes, of course, I understand that,” she said, feeling suitably contrite. “I’m sorry. I’ve been thoughtless.”
“Well, no worries.” He seemed only slightly appeased. “You’re alive and well, that’s what matters. I’ve missed you, Layla. Have you missed me?”
She was saved from answering as a sudden cry went up from Mick to leave the pub and head back to his. Quickly, everyone surged forward, eager to continue into the night. Terrified she’d be left in an empty bar with just Alex for company, she said, “Come on, let’s go.”
Although clearly reluctant, he duly followed, both of them tagging onto the back of the crowd. Joseph, it seemed, had already left.
“How far is Mick’s house?” said Alex shuffling forward. “I’m not up for a big walk, you know.”
“Not far. Just up the road, that’s all.”
Mick’s was, in fact, a rather substantial fifteen minute walk from the pub. He lived in a rustic two-up, two-down stone-walled cottage further along the headland. Although the cottage was small, he had a huge garden, and she knew there’d be fire pits dotted around so people could enjoy the outdoors despite the early winter cold.
As they walked, Layla wondered if Alex could sense the awkwardness between them just as much as she could or whether it existed mainly in her head. At one point, he reached out to grab her hand. She considered taking it back, but she didn’t feel up to battling with him about it. Instead, she bit down hard on the distaste that rose up in her.
As they reached Mick’s cottage, Alex was still grumbling. “How long do we have to stay?” he asked tetchily.
“Not long. I need to clear up a couple of matters before we head off.” Matters like Joseph and whether all’s okay with Hannah and Jim.
“I’m tired, Layla.” He let out a heavy sigh. “I’ve driven for hours. A full-on party wasn’t quite what I expected when I got here.”
What were you expecting? That I’d jump into bed with you? It took only a moment for her to answer herself. Probably.
The inside of Mick’s cottage was almost as busy as the pub had been, people grabbing beers from the kitchen and drifting outside, toward the fire pits. Where was Hannah? She hadn’t seen her since their talk earlier. Was she at home with Jim, putting into action how much she appreciated his song? Strange, though, she’d been adamant earlier in the day that Layla should come to Mick’s party, so apart from a brief appearance at the pub, why wasn’t she here, too? He was one of their closest friends. She also wondered how things were working out with Penny and Richard. Well, she hoped, knowing she’d find out soon enough.
And then there was Joseph. How the hell was she going to sort out the mess she’d made with him whilst Alex was surgically attached to her? It could wait, she supposed, until tomorrow when she could sneak away somehow. But she didn’t want to wait, not anymore. She wanted to know, right now, if there was any truth in what Hannah had said.
Unable to spot Joseph anywhere in the immediate vicinity, she felt panic beginning to build. Perhaps he’d disappeared with Clare, too. Hannah with Jim, Penny with Richard, Joseph with Clare, which left her with…Alex. She groaned as she scanned the room once more, but there was no sight of Joseph at all. No hint of dark blond hair. She wondered if she should push through to the living room, rush outside maybe, holler his name, anything to find him, but decided at the last moment not to. That look in the pub he had given her, that pain-filled, sad, and intense look. Maybe that had been a goodbye look, a look that said I’m sorry we didn’t work out, but we didn’t, end of.
She hated to admit it, but it kind of made sense.
“Layla, please, at least come outside. I can’t hear myself think in here. It’s deafening.”
It was Alex again, the one who wanted her, not Joseph, despite what she’d been told. Alex who could give her the world, and all she had to do was take it from him. No worries about where she might live, what job she would manage to land herself, whether she’d ever get married and have children. A world that was planned for her, every step of the way.
Finally she said, “Okay, okay, let’s go. No point in staying.”
“Thank God for that,” said Alex, clearly relieved. “What kind of music are they playing in there anyway? It’s rubbish.”
Stop it! Stop it! she wanted to shout, fed up to the back teeth with his moaning. You sound like an old man. He looked older, too, something she had noticed last time he was in Trecastle and noticed even more so now. Could it be that Penny was right? Was he older than forty-three, after all?
“Alex,” she said tiredly, once they were out on the street again, “what is it you want? I mean, really want from me?”
“You know what I want. I’ve already told you.” A smile lit up his face, making him look younger again.
“No, spell it out. I want to hear exactly,” she insisted. Just like I made you spell out that you loved me once upon a time.
“I want marriage, children, the whole works. And to prove it…” He paused for a moment to rummage round in his pocket.
Oh, no, not that damn bracelet, she thought. Not again.
It wasn’t that damn bracelet. It was a ring, a diamond ring—a rock of a ring, in fact—sitting snugly in a ring box, cushioned by golden pillows, glinting at her, as merrily or as malevolently as the bracelet once had.
“There, what do you think of that?” he said triumphantly, clearly mistaking the look on her face for one of wonder. “Impressive, huh?”
“Oh, Alex,” she breathed, about to continue when Penny appeared, hand in hand with Richard.
“Stop right there, Layla Lewis,” yelled Penny. “Don’t you utter another damn word.”
“Penny?” said Layla whilst Alex stared in astonishment.
Finding his voice finally, Alex cleared his throat and said, “Do you mind? We’re trying to have a private moment.”
“A private moment?” spat Penny. “A private moment? You can stuff your private moment.”
Taken aback, he was about
to remonstrate again when Layla said, “No, Alex, let her speak. I want to hear what she has to say.” She turned toward Penny. “Go on, then. Why shouldn’t I utter one more damn word?”
“Because you’re making a huge mistake, that’s why. I know you think you love him, Layla. You think you need him, but you don’t. He’s a serial cheater. He’ll never change.”
Outraged, Alex squared up to Penny. “I most certainly am not,” he said. “It was only the once, and I had my reasons for it. Layla and I have forgotten all about it. We’re trying to move on.”
“Alex,” said Layla, angry at his assumption, “I haven’t forgotten all about Sarah-Jane actually. Far from it. She comes to mind more and more lately. How you had your way with her, changed your mind, wanted me back, so sacked her as if she were a piece of rubbish you could just discard. I also know about Jack’s secretary. He told me everything.”
“Jack’s secretary?” He looked at Layla, the color draining from his face. “Nothing went on with his secretary. He’s lying.”
“She almost resigned because of you, because of your constant pestering. I gather she was fresh from college too. A young girl, probably not even twenty, which makes it even more intolerable.”
“And then there’s me,” Penny piped up. She moved closer to Layla so she could speak exclusively to her. “He made a pass at me, when you were going out with him, one night in a pub, when you had gone to the bar. I didn’t tell you at first because you seemed so happy to be with him. I didn’t want to be the one to ruin things. I didn’t tell you afterward because you were hurt enough already. Perhaps if I had told you straightaway, I’d have saved you a lot of heartache. I’m sorry, Layla.”
“A hat trick, then,” said Layla, as she turned from Penny to Alex again.
“But that was in the past, Layla,” he declared, his face bright red with indignation. “I’ve changed, I told you. Since you agreed to marry me, I’ve been as pure as the driven snow. Haven’t even so much as looked at another woman.”
“I haven’t agreed to marry you,” Layla said firmly. “I said maybe.”
“You said maybe yes.”
Tilting her head to one side, Layla looked as though she were pondering what she had said. All the while Alex stood hopefully.
“I did say that,” she agreed eventually.
“Layla,” Penny warned, “don’t go any further, not until you hear what else I have to say.”
“It’s okay, Penny.” Layla smiled at her. “Don’t worry.”
She walked up to Alex, still holding the boxed ring in his outstretched hand, ever confident. She stared into his deep brown eyes, eyes that looked a little lost at the moment, eyes that had fooled her so much in the past, and said, “I’m sorry, Alex. I can’t marry you. It’s not a maybe yes, after all. It’s a definitely no.”
“Halle-bloody-lujah,” Penny whispered from behind her.
Layla’s body, tense before, relaxed with relief. It was over. At last she had said goodbye to dreams that were only ever, at best, smoky. She had known it was over as soon as she had set eyes on him tonight and all she had felt was dismay. It had actually been over a long time before that, from the moment she had looked into Joseph’s eyes on that cold and rainy day, as he lay in the road looking up at her, drinking her in despite the fact she’d very nearly killed him. Her mother was right: being honest with herself felt good. She could get used to it.
“Come on, Layla.” Penny put her arm round her, intending to lead her away. “There’s something else you need to know. I’ve been sworn to secrecy, but these are outstanding circumstances.”
Puzzled, Layla was about to follow her lead when a wild-eyed Hannah appeared out of nowhere. Hot on her heels was Joseph, who stopped abruptly at the scene before him, his face distinctly clouding at the sight of Alex and the diamond ring.
“Jim!” yelled Hannah. “Have you seen Jim?”
And suddenly nothing mattered but finding Jim.
Chapter Thirty-Four
“HANNAH, HANNAH, CALM DOWN,” Layla said as she gripped her friend hard by the shoulders. “Look at me. When did you last see Jim?”
“On stage, just like you did,” Hannah managed between sobs. “We went outside afterward, remember? I told you what I’d said to him…”
“Yeah, I remember. Go on.”
“After we spoke, I went back in to find him, but he’d gone. Curtis and Ryan hadn’t even noticed. I looked everywhere—in the pub, outside, back at the flat, at Mick’s, but there’s no trace of him. I bumped into Joe, and we’ve been looking ever since. I don’t know what to do…”
“Perhaps he’s just gone for a walk. It’s a lovely night,” ventured Penny, trying to sound comforting but failing dismally.
“No. He hasn’t just gone for a walk,” Hannah insisted. “Something’s happened, I know it. I can sense it.” She turned toward Layla. “Looks like he got the wrong impression after all.”
“Okay,” said Layla, struggling to remain pragmatic, “is his car still at home or has he taken it?”
“It’s still there,” Joseph said, his strong, steady voice, sending a shiver through Layla.
This is not the time, she admonished herself.
“He hasn’t gone far, then. What about the beach? Have you searched the beach?”
“Yeah, of course we’ve searched the beach,” said Hannah. Suddenly her eyes widened with hope. “But not Shipwreck Cove!” Turning swiftly to Joseph, Hannah said, “Do you think he’s gone there, to Shipwreck Cove?”
“He could well have done,” replied Joseph, his face hopeful too.
“Let’s go!”
Both she and Joseph made a break for it, and Layla prepared to follow them.
“Wait!” Richard bellowed, but only Layla stopped.
“It would make more sense to split up,” he continued. “We’ll cover more ground that way. Who’s got their mobile phone?”
“Not me,” said Layla.
“Hmm…mine’s dead too. Okay, we’ll just have to meet back at Layla’s in an hour or so for an update. Penny, come with me. We’ll search the main beach again. Alex, why don’t you go back to the pub and stand guard there?”
“Back to the pub?” Alex laughed callously. “I don’t think so. I’m going home, back to Brighton. There’s nothing to stick around for now.”
“Alex!” yelled Layla in disbelief. “Jim’s gone missing, and we need to find him quickly. This coast can be dangerous. We need your help.”
Alex shrugged his shoulders. “No cigar, I’m afraid. If you don’t want me, I’m out of here. When you change your mind, though—and you will when the reality of life without me hits, when you don’t have two pennies to rub together, when that pathetic wage from that pathetic bar job of yours can’t even cover the winter gas bill—don’t come running. I’ll have moved on. Believe me, there are plenty more brood mares out there.”
“What?!” Layla was shocked.
“Brood mare?” repeated Penny, looking equally stunned.
“Yeah, brood mare. That’s all you ever were,” Alex continued savagely. “I want a son, someone to inherit everything I’ve slogged my entire life to build up. I don’t love you, never have done. Don’t flatter yourself. You’ve just got half-decent genes, that’s all.”
Feeling as though he’d ripped her heart out a second time, not because she loved him but because she had ever loved such a monster, she tried to reply, but failed.
Thankfully Penny came to her rescue. “He’s lying, Layla. Reacting because he’s hurt. Ignore him.”
Richard stepped forward as well. “I think it’s best you do leave, actually,” he said to Alex through gritted teeth. “Right now, in fact. This very minute, whilst both your legs are in good working order.”
“Are you threatening me?” said Alex, a vision of anger, humiliation.
“It certainly sounds like it,” Penny growled, “but believe me, he’s only allowed one leg. I’m going to break the other one.”
“Bunch of los
ers,” Alex said, but the fire had gone out of his eyes. In a whiney voice, he continued, “Layla, please, let me look after you.”
“I can look after myself, thanks!” she shot back.
As Alex backed away, looking quite nervous, Penny came up to Layla and put her arm around her. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” said Layla, feeling really very fine indeed, and with that, she was off in hot pursuit of Joseph and Hannah.
Chapter Thirty-Five
HANNAH KNEW JOSEPH HAD TROUBLE keeping up with her as she flew over the muddy headland to reach Shipwreck Cove, but she was not going to slow down. She was frantic. This was the last place left to look. If Jim wasn’t there, where was he? It didn’t bear thinking about.
Peering down at the cove from the edge of the headland, Hannah noted with relief that the tide was out. It wouldn’t stay out for long, though, and when it came in, it would do so with a vengeance, often catching even the natives by surprise with its speed and ferocity. From a distance she could hear Layla shouting, running after them, closing the gap. Not waiting for her either, Hannah began the descent, thankful the moon was bright enough to light her way.
Down on the beach, she could hear the ocean rather than see it, crunching over impacted sands until it became more visible. Spotting something in the distance, she propelled herself forward.
“It’s his jacket,” she yelled as Layla and Joseph drew closer, both puffing heavily, “and a beer can. He’s here. He’s somewhere here.”
But where? As she stared at the ocean, fear engulfed her. “You don’t think…” she said before rushing up to the water’s edge, screaming Jim’s name.
Behind her, a panicked Joseph and Layla yelled his name too.
When Layla reached her, Hannah stumbled into her arms. “He’s dead! He’s killed himself. I’ve killed him. I pushed him to breaking point.”
“No, no, he would never do that,” Layla replied.
The Runaway Year Page 25