by Ben Stevens
The fact that I had absolutely no idea concerning the actual purpose of this bizarre exercise was of no importance. As was so often the case in these adventures involving my master, I was completely in the dark, aware only that I had to do exactly as he requested.
‘Yes, master.’
‘Go now, and meet me behind the inn where we are staying once it has gotten dark.’
So for the next twelve hours or so I had to go into various inns on my own, spend what felt like the average month’s income for a laborer on drinks for myself and whoever else consented to join me for however long a time, and generally bemoan my master…?
With a mental shrug, I set off.
It was some fifteen hours later that I commenced climbing the bamboo scaffolding surrounding the giant bronze statue of the Buddha. This was again at the express request of my master, whom I’d met as instructed behind the inn once it had grown dark.
With the noise of the cicadas loud in the air, perfectly disguising our conversation which was in any case only mumbled, my master said –
‘Well, Kukai, you certainly smell as though you’ve been drinking all day…’
‘Yes, master,’ I said perfunctorily. ‘I’m afraid I’ve also spent nearly all the money you gave me. Once those other men with a weakness for alcohol realized how readily I was buying, they flocked around me – which at least allowed me to complain loudly about you for hours on end.’
‘Good, good. We may well be playing for far higher stakes than the paltry sum in that leather pouch, in any case. But, promise me one thing, you are not drunk?’
I had never seen my master so concerned about my drinking.
‘No, master. I was able to make it seem as though I was guzzling the stuff, while mostly just slopping it on anything and anyone around me – and also on my own kimono, of course. In fact, I must say, I was actually quite pleased with the performance I gave. Although not drunk in the slightest, I clearly fooled everyone by –’
‘Excellent, excellent,’ mumbled my master in a distracted tone, so that I knew his thoughts were elsewhere. ‘All you must do is to keep up this charade of yours a little while longer – as you climb up the bamboo scaffolding surrounding the bamboo tower.’
As accustomed as I was to my master’s bizarre requests, even I could not prevent myself from blurting –
‘Master, what…’
I sensed rather than saw my master shake his head in the darkness that was near pitch-black (the bright moon had briefly hidden itself), and I at once shut my mouth.
‘If I am correct, you will soon be apprehended by at least two guards, who will easily hear you as you sing, curse and in general make lots of noise as you appear to clumsily (yet actually with extreme caution) clamber up the scaffold.
‘The deceased workman – and also practiced housebreaker – Takahashi was a veteran climber, skilled at moving quickly and silently. It was this that was his undoing, for by the time his presence was realized by these shadowy ‘guards’, he’d climbed too high – and, I strongly suspect, seen too much…
‘For this, he had to die. You, however, will merely be escorted back down to the ground. Without becoming in anyway actually violent, you will still ensure that it takes those who are ‘assisting’ you the longest possible time to remove you from the scaffolding, all the while continuing to curse my name, and state that you only climbed the scaffold in the first place because you wish to investigate the death of Takahashi – there had better be some explanation concerning what you are doing, after all, no matter how drunk you seem…’
…And so now I began climbing the scaffolding, all the while alternating between mumbling to myself and loudly singing snatches of lewd songs. The moon was bright upon the bronze statue of the Buddha, His giant hands resting in his lap. The thick lengths of bamboo seemed well tied together, and at regular intervals there were stout boards to walk upon. A seasoned laborer or construction worker wouldn’t just ‘fall’ from this scaffold – of that I was certain.
I was barely twenty feet or so above the ground, when suddenly my arm was seized by a grip of iron. Fortunately I resisted my immediate desire to cry out and spin around, my free hand grabbing for that dagger I always carry within my kimono – for such actions would certainly not be those of a man who was almost dead-drunk.
‘Wha… Who’s there…?’ I slurred.
‘Leave me be and… let’s have a drink,’ I continued, using my free hand to instead produce the half-empty flask of sake I’d had the foresight to also place inside my kimono.
I waved this flask uncertainly in front of me.
‘Here…’ I said.
The flask was at once snatched away from my grasp, and a voice said –
‘This is Ennin’s servant, I recognize him from earl– ’
‘Never mind him!’ I bellowed. ‘My name is Kukai, and I’ll start having a bit of respect! D’you hear? Always I hear Ennin this, Ennin that… Well I’m every bit as capable as… as that man, I’ll have you know, and I’ll…’
‘I’ll have to help you get him off,’ said another voice – and with that, my other arm was grasped.
I began to resist.
‘Hey, what are you doing?’ I bellowed. ‘Unhand me – unhand me this instant! I’m investigating the case of that… that man… who… who fell this morning.’ (Again I let my voice falter and slur, as though I was in danger of suddenly ‘ejecting’ all that I’d drunk today.) ‘This is a very important case, I’m Kukai, and I refuse to – ’
‘Come on, now,’ said the first voice that had spoken. ‘Let’s get you back down on the ground – you’re drunk, and in danger up here.’
‘I tell you I’m okay!’ I cried, while giving the impression that I was frantically trying to get free of their grasp. In fact, although I wasn’t using all my strength, still I suspected that even if I had been, still I would not have been able to break their grip upon me. They were simply too strong, so that it was almost like a child that I was escorted back down the scaffold to the base of the statue. There they let me go; and just to complete the charade (and in accordance with my master’s instructions, buy a bit more time) I fell down upon my hands and knees, retching.
‘Leave him,’ said the first voice.
‘We can’t,’ said the second. ‘That’s Ennin’s servant – we’ll have to get him back to wherever he’s staying.’
‘But we’ve got our orders,’ said First Voice. ‘We can’t leave here...’
A hand again seized my bicep.
‘Look here,’ said First Voice close by my ear. ‘Can you remember where it is you’re staying?’
I thought frantically for a moment. Should I try to get these guards to show me the way back to the inn, just to get a little more time for – well, for whatever it was my master needed this time for…?
I’d done enough, I decided. My master had said nothing about actually trying to draw these guards away from the statue, after all.
‘Down there… left… left again, and right… Name of inn is… is the Black Cat…’ I stammered, as assisted by the grip on my arm I rose slowly to my feet, vaguely pointing.
‘Just get home, and get to bed,’ said First Voice again.
I nodded, and staggered off. I kept up the charade as I entered into the centre of town (the giant statue lay on the outskirts, rather removed from any dwellings) and along a succession of narrow streets, banging into those people still out and generally making a nuisance of myself.
Finally, nearing the inn where I was staying with my master, I straightened myself and entered quietly inside. I stole along a couple of corridors until I came to my room.
I opened it, stepped inside – and there was my master, sitting on a futon with a lamp burning beside him. He poured me a drink from a flask of sake, which I gladly accepted, for I was parched after my day-long performance.
‘Well,’ said my master, smiling although his eyes were dark and serious. ‘The daimyo Tsukino is certainly cleverer than I would
have given him credit for. Who would have thought that this little man, with a face shaped like a frog’s, would apparently be familiar with one of the most destructive weapons ever devised by that ancient Greek physicist and inventor, Archimedes? He has made some slight modifications to this weapon, of course – but still the basic principle is the same…’
‘Master?’ I said helplessly.
‘Never mind, Kukai,’ returned my master. ‘I have tried to anticipate what will actually occur the day the ceremony for this statue is held, and accordingly have sent message to both the Imperial Court and also the daimyo of the next region, Ito – who is also due to attend the ceremony along with his samurai.
‘Until then, we can do no more – we have merely to wait…’
4
Hundreds of people gathered that morning for the ceremony to be conducted for the newly-constructed statue of the Buddha. It was a blazing hot day, the sun high and bright in a clear blue sky. My master and I sat along with the daimyo of the neighboring region, Ito, a number of his most important samurai, and other ‘special guests’ who were kept sheltered under a large black ‘net’ which effectively served to protect us from the sun, while a number of servants used large fans affixed to the ends of wooden poles to keep us cool. (The rest of the gathered assembly was merely obliged to try and find such shade as was available underneath trees and the like.)
A priest stood in front of the bronze statue, from which all scaffolding had now been removed. He chanted in a deep, melodious voice. Then, finishing this blessing, he turned and bowed to the daimyo Tsukino, who was attired in a luxurious kimono and accompanied by his own samurai bodyguard.
‘Two years ago,’ began the small daimyo, his froglike face contorted with such evident pleasure that it was somehow almost disconcerting to see, ‘I started and then lost a war with my honorable neighbor. To make amends for this, it was requested that I construct the statue of the Buddha that you see before you now. A statue to be built at the highest point of my territory, overlooking that which is governed by lord Ito.
‘Well, now this statue is finished – and so now, finally, I may have my revenge for all the humiliation that I have suffered!’
With these words, the ‘servants’ fanning us abruptly produced hidden knives and slashed at the cords holding the black net above us. It at once dropped down upon us, as Ito’s samurai cried out and made efforts to draw their swords.
But then archers appeared, fanning out around us with their bows drawn and arrows cocked.
‘Struggle no more, or I give the order for them to fire,’ sneered Tsukino.
‘What is the meaning of this?’ bellowed Ito.
‘Some two years ago you all but destroyed my castle by fire,’ returned Tsukino. ‘Well, now I get to return the favor – before I then take control of your territory. But if you behave yourself, and pay me the necessary homage, then I may consent to spare your life.
‘But first – allow me to demonstrate the real purpose of this statue…’
There was at once a creaking noise, coming from the head of the Buddha sixty feet above us. The eyes were being ‘opened’ – daylight could be seen through them! So part of the back of the Buddha’s head must also have somehow been removed. And yet the blue sky and the burning yellow sun were blocked in places by something… I struggled to see what… a strange-looking system of mirrors…
And then I, and everyone save for my master, gave a gasp as two shots of intense yellow light burst from Buddha’s eyes, meeting several meters in front and so continuing in a single line running diagonally downwards… straight towards Ito’s castle. Despite the black net in which I was entangled, and the archers gathered threateningly around, I did my best to stand, craning my neck to observe the captured light and heat of the sun – for this was surely the purpose of those mirrors I’d seen inside Buddha’s head – strike into one courtyard, and specifically a large pile of hay obviously left out for the horses of the samurai.
This hay began to smolder and then quickly caught fire; it was piled against one wooden wall which – thoroughly dried out in the brutal summer heat – was now just so much tinder. I saw how quickly Ito’s castle would burn; already the flames were spreading…
But then something remarkable happened. A number of men and women at once appeared, carrying buckets of water. These they threw upon and all around the fire, quickly extinguishing it. And then another group appeared, this time holding a large, concave mirror – even from some distance away I could see that this mirror was as tall as a man, and about the same measurement in width.
‘A rather clumsy parabolic reflector, and yet it will have to suffice…’ I heard my master mumble, as though to himself.
The men carrying this distinctly curved mirror had what seemed to be strips of fabric tied around their eyes, presumably to protect them from that dazzling ray emitting from the statue of the Buddha stood approximately half a mile away. The centre of the mirror was thrust in front of this ray; and instantly the glowing yellow line seemed to ‘thicken’, to burn even brighter, as it was directed back towards its initial source.
There were cries from inside the head of the Buddha. Smoke began to pour out of the eye sockets, obscuring the sight of the blue sky, the sun and the mirrors. Suddenly a long rope ladder was thrown out of one eye socket, and two figures hurriedly emerged to clamber down it. I wondered if these were not the two men, the guards, who’d stopped me from climbing the scaffold surrounding the statue just a few days previously.
‘Get back – back, you fools!’ screamed Tsukino, his face suffused with cheated fury. The archers surrounding us were also looking up at this amazing spectacle – so they did not notice as another group of soldiers (both archers and swordsmen) appeared behind them. I gave a slight gasp as I recognized their armor; these were certainly elite soldiers from the Imperial City itself, who could only be deployed upon a direct order given by the Empress.
My master had requested such a thing, I realized. (The regular reader will already be aware of the special relationship my master has with the Empress, which began after he saved her life in the case I entitled The Empress and the Monk, and which has continued through such adventures as The Black Death.)
And my master had discovered what was inside the head of the Buddha – while I unwittingly ‘distracted’ those two guards – and using that formidable brain of his had quickly worked out (from the position of the mirrors) where that lethal beam of sunlight was set to strike, before leaving again…
‘It’s over, Tsukino,’ said my master now, as he, I, Ito and his samurai began to cut our way out of the net. The Imperial soldiers surrounded the archers and Tsukino’s samurai, taking their weapons before making them kneel on the ground with their hands upon their heads.
‘You – detective or magician or whatever the hell it is you are,’ snarled Tsukino, his froglike eyes bulging as he surveyed my master. ‘You’ll pay for this, that I promise you…’
‘That,’ said my master calmly, as he stepped free of that accursed black net that had had us all trapped, ‘is very much dependent upon the decision which lord Ito is about to make. Namely, whether to again respond to your act of naked aggression with mercy – or whether to deal with you in a way which ensures that you never pose a threat to anyone ever again…’
And with this, my master looked meaningfully at Ito, who had also just freed himself from the net…
5
Following Tsukino’s execution (by decapitation) just the following day, Ito automatically took control of his region. The first thing Ito did was to drastically lower the exorbitant taxes Tsukino had been charging his subjects, so that no one (save perhaps Tsukino’s most loyal samurai, who had undoubtedly also profited from their master’s greed) had any cause to regret the change in daimyo.
My master respectfully declined Ito’s invitation to stay for a while; and with his thanks ringing in our ears, we again set off on our ceaseless, lonely wandering across Japan.
‘Yes,’ said my master, once I’d prompted him with a gentle question concerning all that had happened recently. ‘It was necessary first of all that you loudly declare how tired you were of me, of my company, so that it would then be assumed that you were acting entirely of your own accord when you were caught ‘drunkenly’ climbing that bamboo scaffolding. It was vital that your actions weren’t recognized as being a cover for my own…
‘In any case, as you so effectively distracted those two ninja – for that is surely what they are, as in all the confusion that followed the attempted, failed destruction of Ito’s castle, they managed to make their escape – I quickly scaled the scaffolding and found an entrance into the interior of the Buddha’s head.
‘This entrance was locked; but still this lock could be picked by someone with the correct tools and experience. That would have been the workman Takahashi, who – I have no doubt – also made it inside the head, and there illuminated by the moonlight shining through the opened door behind him saw the system of mirrors so carefully positioned.
‘Whether he actually realized their intended purpose is extremely doubtful, but still those two ninja assigned to discreetly guard the statue were taking no chances. Dealing the captured, would-be burglar a stunning blow to the back of his neck, they then flung him from the scaffold, to be discovered by the other, arriving workmen the following morning.
‘Who,’ my master continued, ‘had no idea what was inside the head of the Buddha statue. I have since learnt from the foreman Yamazaki that ‘specialist workmen’ from China were drafted in to build that part of the statue, with all other workers strictly forbidden to even go near the head without special permission – purportedly for religious reasons, it being a sacred area and so on…’
‘But you realized the purpose of the mirrors, master,’ I declared. ‘And then sent word to both the Empress and the daimyo Ito, detailing what they needed to do…’
‘I also visited Tsukino the morning after you were ‘discovered’ upon the scaffolding, to personally apologize for your behavior as you apparently lay in bed, sick with a hangover,’ said my master. ‘It was obvious he’d heard your loud complaints concerning our relationship together the previous day, and was entirely taken in by our little deception.
