Her senses began reorienting her to where she was, and she could hear the wind though the palm trees around her and the chirp and buzz of a million critters. The admission that whatever she was dealing with was more than she could handle on her own washed over her and filled her with both fear and relief. “I need help,” she said again, wondering if it would be more powerful a second time. It held the same heavy certainty. She did need help, and she needed it soon. Things had happened to her, scary things that were obviously taking their toll on her mental health. She needed to get back to who she once was; she needed to feel whole again. While she regularly talked to her family and friends, she’d kept how bad things were to herself. She didn’t want them to worry. What would they say if they knew the truth?
Finally she opened her eyes and flipped onto her back, staring up at the blue, blue sky and wondering how her life had gotten so out of control. Control had always been Sadie’s foundation. It had gotten her through her husband’s death more than twenty years ago. It had helped her raise her two children by herself. It had led to her being involved in several police investigations. But she’d lost her confidence in the wake of Boston, and her world had been spinning out of control ever since.
She got to her feet and looked out at the water that seemed so innocent now that she wasn’t in it. The Blue Muumuus were back in the boat, coming toward her, and she felt overwhelmed by embarrassment and shame while grateful she wouldn’t have to consider swimming back to them. They had always been so kind to her, and she had so little to give back. Now she’d ruined their adventure. Konnie waved her arms, and Sadie waved back to indicate she was all right. The salt water was beginning to dry the sand to her skin, making her feel gritty.
A small boat dock had been built into the rocks along the beach, and Sadie headed toward it so that the boat could pick her up. The floating dock moved gently beneath her feet when she stepped on it, and she froze for a moment, afraid she might fall in.
Konnie pointed the boat in Sadie’s direction, and Sadie walked slowly down the weathered boards, dreading the explanation of her bolt to the shore. What could she tell them other than the truth? Hi, my name is Sadie, and I’m losing my mind. Congratulations on winning front-row tickets to the show.
When she reached the end of the dock, she waited for the boat like a penitent child, watching the water lap against the sides of the wood, black with barnacles and other sea life that gave Sadie the chills. Long strands of dark seaweed flowed alongside, like the hair of a mermaid from some long ago fairy tale. Sadie watched it move, looking so fluid and graceful, and tried to draw calmness from its easy motion. After a few seconds, however, she realized the seaweed was black, not green. Despite her misgivings, she bent down to get a closer look into the water and was soon on her knees, peering at the underside of the dock, where what she thought was seaweed was actually hair connected to a human head.
Scrambling to her feet as fresh panic descended like a hammer, Sadie screamed for help at the same moment that she lost her balance and plunged headlong into the sea that had already claimed one victim.
Pumpkin Roll Page 36
