by Megan Rivers
“Then my mom went into labor really early on a Saturday morning. I guess she fell and fainted or something and my dad had to call 9-1-1. She said when she opened her eyes she saw a rainbow across the sky as they loaded her into the ambulance and she told my dad that my name would be Meadow.”
“That is really cool,” I admitted with a smile. It was a much better story than being named after my mom's favorite holiday (Christmas) and her childhood pet cat (Cleopatra).
“Yeah, my dad got his way though, too. He chose my middle name: Meadow Greene. It's a bit hippie-ish, but I like it.”
And the stories didn't stop there. When we got home I helped Meadow hang up each item with tie-dye crepe paper. We sat on the floor, drinking large mugs of hot chocolate as she shared each memory with me. We laughed and cried. I couldn't image the amount of pain Meadow went through with the loss of her mother and I hoped I would never find out.
An hour later Kevin came home apologizing profusely on neglecting his morning duty, nearly in tears. I sat in the kitchen, waiting for the water in the teapot to boil and eating Oreos as they talked through it, trying to be supportive and not intrusive.
When my mother walked in the front door, I ran through the house and into her arms, trying not to cry. At that moment I was never more thankful to have her in my life. As I clung to her at the bottom of the staircase, and she put her arms reassuringly up and down my back, Kevin held Meadow in the crook of his arm as they sat at the top of the staircase, floating in a sea of memories.
Mom, Kevin, Meadow and I sat on the wooden floor of the upstairs hallway until 3:30 in the morning erecting the memorial. The more I got to know Leah Langston, the more I got to know Meadow and Kevin and I loved them even more. Mom and I just listened and laughed and comforted the tears when we could.
That night was a huge milestone for us. Even years after she left, Leah had pulled us closer together, closer to becoming a family.
III.
Bridging the Gap
“Steady As We Go” – Dave Matthews Band
It had already been five weeks since Mom brought me back from the airport and so much had changed. We were falling into a new routine. Mom was teaching her evening class, which meant I was at our apartment instead of with the Langston's. I had just gotten out of the shower and was blow drying my hair, procrastinating on my chemistry homework and chores. It was during those mindless activities like doing the dishes, blow drying my hair, and walking to school, when my brain flitted back to older memories.
I was grateful to hear the telephone ring as a distraction, even though it was probably a sales call. The extension in Mom’s room trilled loudly and I jumped over the boxes of my clothes that finally arrived from Australia and were being stored in the hallway.
“Hello?” The air was cooler in Mom’s room and I brushed the warm hair out of my face as I tightened the belt on my robe.
There was a pause and I waited for a telemarketer to greet me with an exciting new offer that I had to act upon right now.
The line crackled a bit.
“Christie?”
I knew that voice instantly and my heart jumped. “Galvin?”
“It’s really you!” His voice resonated with relief and jubilation.
“It’s really you!” I repeated his exclamation. I was in mild shock. It was better than finding a letter waiting for me in the tin box downstairs as I arrived home from school. “How are you?” Was I awake? Was it really him? “I can't believe it's really you!” I was so happy that my surroundings got blurry. ”How did you find me? I can't believe you're calling!”
“I tried calling you earlier but there was no answer.” I mentally thought back to the time I spent between the phone call and getting home from school.
“Sorry! I was playing tennis with an old friend and Mom's been at work.” I bit my bottom lip half ashamed that I wasn't here and half relieved he had caught me now.
“It's fine. I’m so happy I found you. I can't believe you're in Chicago.” His voice sounded beautiful. God, I missed that voice in my ear.
“Me either! I've been back about a month. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you, I lost your address when―wait, how did you find me? How did you know I was in Chicago?”
He took a long sigh. I imagined him leaning his elbow against a wall, table, or in his lap, putting his finger to his temple like I so often saw him do. “Well, I wasn't getting any letters from you. I thought I did something horrible and begged for an explanation. I needed to talk to you. I needed to hear your voice. I needed you. When nothing came I called your father.” He paused.
My hand flew to my mouth. “You did not!” Disbelief drenched my words.
“I did.” He let out a chuckle. “He was very... charming.” His statement oozed sarcasm.
I could not imagine any kind of communication between them. Well, not civil communication anyway. “What happened? What did you do? What did he do?”
“In October we were in Tokyo. Tobias had called to tell us that Trey’s Mom, my aunt, she had a heart attack. We rushed back to Germany as soon as we could. We canceled four shows on the tour which ticked off H.I.T.Z but…”
“Is she all right?” I asked sitting down on my mom's bedspread.
“She’s in stable condition. We just got back about a week ago and we’ve been extra busy trying to make up what we missed. When we were in Germany, Trey was really beat up about his Mom and things were tense. I was playing the guitar one night and it turned into your song again and I really wanted to talk to you so I picked up my mobile and called information. They connected me to Richard and Penelope Kelly’s estate in Melbourne and he answered.
“When I asked if you were available he actually said that there was never anyone there by that name and told me never to call again. I wasn’t sure if you were really gone or if you were in that much trouble.”
I chuckled. “I can’t believe it.”
“Yeah. I remembered that your mom was in Chicago, so I tried to find her number, but do you know how many Kelly’s are listed in that city?”
I nodded and laughed. “There are a lot of Irish here.” It was probably like trying to find that proverbial needle in a haystack.
“I noticed.” I could hear him speak through a smile on the other side of the world. “But I needed to hear your voice again, and,” he paused momentarily, “I know this sounds silly because we haven't spent a lot of time together, but I didn't want to lose you,” he admitted and I could hear the stress in his voice. My face grew warm with his sentence.
“So I printed out the phone numbers for all the Kelly's in Chicago and have been calling my way down the list since we've been back on tour.”
I leaned back onto the pillows on the bed, taken aback with what Galvin had divulged. I inhaled the smell of coconut all around me. “Galvin, that's―“
“Crazy, I know.”
“Yeah.” I agreed. My hand fidgeted with the necklace I wore, filtering through my thoughts. “The craziest but sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me.” I shook my head trying to figure out why he would do such a [nice, sweet, zealous] thing. “I don't understand why you would do that... for me.”
“Oh Christie,” he sounded disappointed. “I will spend as long as I have to in order to show you why you're worth the trouble. Don't ever think you aren't.”
Admittedly, I smiled. “That job is a lost cause.” I rolled my eyes, feeling my face flush.
“We'll see,” he replied, his voice a sizzling velvet. Oh that voice! How easily I dismissed its powers.
“I’m so glad you called.” My eyes crossed over to the clock on the bedside table and I wondered what time it was where ever Galvin was calling from. “Where are you right now? What time is it?”
“Um, it is,” he paused and I could imagine him leaning over to find a clock somewhere, “nine o'clock in the morning. We are about to leave Singapore and head to Jakarta for a few days. After that we are going to Bangkok and then will be finished!”
“You mean the tour is over?” I asked, surprised.
“Yes. We've been on tour since May! After we finish in Bangkok we have some appearances in New York and Los Angeles, but then nothing until after the holidays. It'll be exciting to stop and relax for a while. But I don’t want to talk about all that right now. Tell me how Chicago is. How did you convince your father to let you come back?”
“There wasn’t much convincing, really. He was tired of fighting with me when I wasn’t turning into Kellyn,” I admitted.
“And it only took three months?” he asked, sounding impressed. “What did you do?”
“I might have skipped school… a lot, but it was a horrible place anyway.” I said, wondering if I might still have been harboring a smidgen of guilt. “He put me on a plane as soon as I got home on my birthday.”
He sighed and his tone hinted at a smile. “You never stop surprising me, Christie.” It sounded like a compliment that I didn't deserve.
I picked up one of Mom's pillows and hugged it, resting my chin on it. “I was quite horrible, actually.” It was true; I had been reflecting upon my time with my father and I did feel some guilt about not trying to fit into his world, but also pride for not letting him change who I was. Needless to say, it was an eternal struggle to deal with my daddy issues.
“I don’t think there’s anything horrible about it.” Galvin said adamantly. “You stood up for yourself and what you believed was right, despite the consequences you knew they had.”
I sighed at Galvin’s optimism. “I miss you,” I admitted. “I didn't notice how much until now.” I might have blushed with my honesty.
“I miss you too.” He sighed.
The sound of the front door opening bit through the bubble I built around me and Galvin's phone call. “Oh, I love the smell of burnt hair in the evening!” My mom’s voice traveled through the apartment and I heard her toss her keys onto the counter. “Are you busy? How do noodles sound for dinner?” Her voice searched the rooms for my whereabouts.
I cupped the receiver with my fist and yelled, “Sounds good. I'm on the phone!”
“Is that your mother?” he asked, his voice perking up.
“Yeah. Do noodles sound good to you for dinner?” I asked sarcastically.
Mom appeared in the doorway of her bedroom. “Who you talking to?” she asked, throwing her shoes beneath her bed.
I could feel my face burning but I couldn’t help smiling as I said, “It’s Galvin.”
Mom’s eyes brightened and a trailing “Ohhh,” came out of her mouth. I rolled my eyes in response and she tip-toed backwards out of her room and closed the door.
“Do you have to go?” he asked.
“No, I’m yours for the night.”
“I wish.”
“Galvin!” My face, I'm sure, turned a deeper shade of red but I couldn't help but smile.
He chuckled. “All right. So tell me what you do all day in Chicago.”
“School mostly. I hang out with Meadow a lot. Mom and I spend most weekends at Kevin’s house.”
“Do you like them?” he asked before I could elaborate on who Kevin and Meadow were. Then it dawned on me that he remembered my brief mention of them from one of Mom's letters. The realization made me smile.
“I do. Kevin loves Mom and treats me like his daughter. And Meadow? Words cannot describe how fantastic she is,” I said beaming at having these wonderful people suddenly in my life.
“How does she compare to Kellyn?”
I blurted out a hearty laugh just trying to imagine the two of them in the same room. “She isn’t even on the same planet. Meadow is the exact opposite of Kellyn.”
I could hear a soft sigh over the phone. “I wish I could see you in that life. I only know the Australian you.”
“Me too. I would love to meet the I'm-On-Vacation you. I bet he's a barrel of laughs.” I sighed and the sound of incessant honking traveled through up from the street below the window beside me. “How many more days until you're done?”
“Two weeks.”
I scratched my head and closed my eyes, imagining him talking next to me, rather than halfway across a planet. “Then what?”
“Four days in New York, two days in Los Angeles. We are going back to Germany until January when we go back to the studio to record the new album.”
I half-grinned forgetting he wasn't there to see it as a sign of encouragement. “Oh, the lamentable tale of your alarm clock life.”
There were several seconds of silence.
“Christie,” he said in a tone of realization. “That’s perfect.”
“What is?”
“Lamentable tale,” I heard paper rummaging on his side of the line. “Do you mind if I use it for a song?”
“No, of course not. They’re just words.” I didn't understand why he was getting so excited.
“Trey will love you for those words. We have not been able to finish the last verse of God's Alarm Clock, but this is gold.”
“If you say so.” I shrugged, but thought back to the night in Melbourne when they started writing the song. “You know, you guys are amazing at how you come up with those songs. It just astounds me when I think about it.”
“No, Don McLean is amazing at songwriting, we’re just… lucky.”
I rolled my eyes at his modesty even though it had no effect.
“Hold on a second,” Galvin said and I heard muffled voices. “Christie?”
“Yeah?”
“I have to go. Our flight is boarding.” He paused. I heard him take a deep breath and let it out in a flourish. “Now that I have you again, I don’t want to say good bye.”
“Me either, but you have to go be brilliant now and wow crowds of people.”
He let out a small chuckle. “Life is tough,” he said sarcastically.
I smiled. “Good night, Galvin.”
“Good morning Christie.”
I held the phone to my ear until I heard the dial tone. I put the phone back in its cradle and stared at the knob on the top dresser drawer while I replayed the entire phone conversation in my head, holding onto his voice.
He called every night after that.
IV.
Melted Steel Donuts on Main
“Teacher, Teacher” – Matt White
The next day I took the train to the station on the north side after school. Meadow was on the platform as I got off the train, bundled in her long green puffy coat. She was talking to a tall boy who looked Native American. His long thick hair was pulled back by a rubber band at the nape of his neck. “Christie!” She waved when she saw me.
I walked over to them and she gestured towards the young man. “This is Dorian.” Then she turned to me. “This is Christie.” Her tone was very matter-of-fact.
His thin lips pulled into a smile. “Hey,” he said nodding his head. His voice was deeper than I expected it would be.
He turned back to Meadow. “Thanks again for the ride.”
“No problem,” Meadow replied, a wistful smile on her face. “See you on Monday?”
“You got it.” He smiled and moved his way across the platform.
She watched him walk away and when he was far enough, she linked her arms with mine. “I love him,” Meadow said dreamily, turning us towards the street.
“Really? You hide it so well.” I laughed as I pulled her towards the car.
She got in the driver’s side and I picked up a LFO CD and an empty water bottle off the floor mat before I slid into the passenger seat. “So where did Dorian come from?”
Meadow shifted the car in reverse. “He started working at the tutoring center with me in September. He needed a ride to the train station and I just so happened to be going there to pick up my favorite person in the world,” she said flashing me a smile before looking in the rearview mirror to back out of her parking spot.
“What about you? I’ve heard Cindy tell Dad about your boyfriend. When will I get to meet him?”
I smiled as Galvin’s
face flashed across my mind. “I’m not really sure if he is my boyfriend.”
“Never mind the logistics. What’s his name?”
It's true. Up until this moment I hadn't told Meadow about Galvin, specifically. ”Remember when I told you about my plane trip to Australia and the guy I sat next to?”
Meadow pointed to me. “You mean the guy who practically saved your sanity and played cards with you the entire time and had,“ she used air quotes to emphasize, “ a 'voice' that 'melted steel'?”
I rolled my eyes. “Yeah. Him.”
“You're dating him?”
“Well, not in the traditional way, I guess.” I had a hard time describing our relationship to myself. We never really defined what we were to each other. Besides, that whole dating thing was something foreign to me. It was like playing a strange board game without instructions.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Meadow rolled her head instead of her eyes. “You guys still talk?”
“Every night,” I admitted, hiding my smile.
“You like him?” Meadow asked though it sounded more like a statement.
“Yes.”
“And he likes you?”
“Yes.”
“Sounds legit to me.” Meadow shrugged as if it were a seal of approval that the status was official. She pulled Ribbit into a Dunkin' Donuts drive thru.
“Yeah, but we're not together, everyday. It's just phone calls and letters,” I shared hoping that her confidence would define a few things for me.
“So?” she asked, turning her body towards me as we waited in queue.
“So... it's not normal.”
“And?” Meadow drew out the word and made a circular motion with her hand, urging me to continue.
“And what?” I shrugged.
Meadow pulled the car up to the window to place an order. “That's your problem? Not being normal?” She smirked and raised her eyebrow as if to say, “Really?” then manually rolled down her window, letting in a wave of cold air. As she ordered a Boston Cream for her and a strawberry frosted for me with two vanilla spiced coffees, I wondered if that really was it.
