“Nick, don’t,” Melody continued in a softer voice, just barely audible over the woman wailing about broken hearts up onstage. “This doesn’t have to change anything.”
“No, I should go,” Nick said, forcing a smile. “You’re a beautiful, sweet person, Mel. You deserve a beautiful first time and a great boyfriend and…all that good stuff, and that’s just not me. But I hope we can still be cool at work, you know, friends and…whatever.”
He started to go, but Melody stopped him before he could turn around.
“Nick, wait,” she said, a furrow forming between her eyes. “Maybe I’m not ready to go home with you right now, but I don’t want to be friends, either. There’s something between us, something amazing and intense that I’ve never felt before. And I know you feel it, too.”
“It doesn’t matter,” Nick said, suddenly needing to be out of this bar and away from Melody as quickly as possible. “I’ve got to go. See you at work.”
He turned and pushed his way through the crowd, ignoring Melody’s call for him to come back. On his way to the door, he caught John’s eye and lifted a hand to wave good-bye, making it clear that he was leaving, but that John was free to stay.
Nick wanted his friend to stay and hopefully find a woman who would rather go home to her place tonight. Nick didn’t want to hear any noises coming from John’s side of the apartment. Being so close to people doing all the things he wished he could be doing with Melody would be torture. Pure torture.
Like being so close to having the girl he couldn’t get out of his mind, and being forced to walk away.
Chapter Four
The next morning, Melody woke up feeling miserable and cranky and achy all over. For a second, she thought she might have the flu, but then the events of the night before came rushing back.
After Nick had bailed on her for the crime of being a twenty-two year old virgin—a fact that still filled Melody with a horrible mix of mortification, anger, and frustration—she had called Kitty and told her friend not to bother coming out to the bar. She’d lied and said she had a headache, and then caught a cab back to her apartment where she’d spent the next two hours tossing and turning in her bed, unable to sleep.
The sheets were suddenly too scratchy, the air-conditioned room too hot, and the fan so squeaky it set her teeth to grinding. Every tiny stimulus pricked at her skin like needles, and all she could think about was Nick. Nick and his bone-melting kisses and electrifying touch.
She hated him for making her feel this way, for awakening a hunger inside of her she’d had no idea existed and then leaving her alone and unfulfilled, so sexually frustrated even seven hours of sleep couldn’t banish the itch beneath her skin.
“I should have kept quiet about the Big V and gone home with him,” she muttered to her squeaky ceiling fan, but the words felt wrong in her mouth.
She didn’t want her first time to be a casual thing. She’d waited so long, and even though she was fed up with waiting—and of the mind that maybe God and her mama would forgive her for having premarital sex since she was over the age of twenty-one and had done her best to find a husband—she was still a romantic.
She wanted to be in love. She wanted undying devotion and hearts and flowers…but she also wanted Nick. She wanted him bad. The dreams she’d had last night had probably been X-rated. Melody had never watched pornography, but she was pretty sure the images that filled her head every time she thought of her and Nick alone together would qualify as smut of the highest degree.
A part of her was ashamed, a part of her was turned-on, and all of her was very, very confused.
She needed advice, and in this particular situation there was only one person she would feel comfortable talking to, one person who knew a thing or two about bad boys, being wild, and living to move on, marry, and settle down with the man of her dreams.
***
Two hours later, Melody was knocking on her sister, Aria’s, door, a bag of fresh bagels in one hand and two tubs of flavored cream cheese in another.
Aria opened the door, a surprised smile on her face. She was still in her pajama shorts and a tank top and her long, wild red hair hadn’t been brushed, but she looked happy to see her sister. Still, Melody felt compelled to ask—
“Is this a bad time? Am I too early? I can come back later if I’m too early.”
“Don’t be silly, come in! We’re just having a lazy morning. Nothing bagels and a sister can’t improve on.” Aria motioned her inside and led the way to the kitchen, past the living room where her husband, Nash, and Felicity, Aria’s baby from her first marriage, were playing with toys on the floor.
Felicity looked up to see her Aunt Melody and gave a happy squeal.
“I call all the garlic bagels!” Nash said before smiling at Melody and wishing her a “good morning.”
“Good morning,” Melody said, unnerved by Nash’s grin. Nash and Nick were brothers, but they didn’t really look that much alike—Nash was taller, broader, more muscled, and much more conservative in his dress and habits—but when they smiled…
It was the same exact smile, the one she’d seen on Nick’s face last night when he’d assured her that he didn’t mind coming back to her place.
“You can’t have all the garlic bagels,” Aria said, hustling back into the living room and snatching the bag from Melody’s hand, helping banish the uncomfortable moment. “If you’re eating garlic, I’m eating garlic. Otherwise, I’m not kissing you until the stink wears off.”
“Fate worse than death,” Nash said, grin widening as he met his wife’s eyes. “Then I’ll take one garlic, one plain, and Skeeter and I will split a cinnamon raisin.”
“Eet eet!” Felicity cried out and reached for Nash to pick her up.
“I didn’t know she could say ‘eat’ now!” Melody cried, turning to Aria with an excited smile.
“She doesn’t. That’s how she says ‘Skeeter,’” Aria said with a mock glare at Nash as he passed by her on his way to the kitchen, Felicity babbling happily in his arms. “Nash’s delightful nickname seems to have stuck.”
“It is a delightful nickname,” Nash said. “Isn’t it Skeeter?”
“Eet!” Felicity shouted with such enthusiasm Melody couldn’t help but laugh.
Aria sighed and rolled her eyes, but she wasn’t fooling anyone. Melody had never seen her sister so happy. She and Nash were made for each other, and the family they’d made together was something really special.
“Come on,” Aria said, putting an arm around Melody’s waist. “Help me get some of these in the toaster over. I’ll make coffee and then we can go out on the patio and have a talk.”
“How did you know I came to talk?” Melody asked, letting herself be led into the sun-drenched kitchen, where Nash and Aria’s paintings filled the walls, leaving no doubt that two artists were in residence even if one of them happened to be a police Captain and the other a pastry chef.
“I’m psychic,” Aria said with a mischievous grin. “And you’re never out of bed before nine on a Saturday unless you’re upset about something.”
“She’s wise, this one,” Nash said, settling Felicity into her high chair and crossing to take Aria in his arms and press a kiss to the top of her head.
The moment was so sweet and loving that Melody’s heart lurched in her chest, happiness for her sister warring with the miserable certainty that she would never find a love like Nash and Aria’s.
“You two take the last two cups of this pot and go on out for your talk,” Nash said, hugging Aria closer before taking the bagel bag from her hand. “I’ll take care of the bagels and the fresh pot of coffee.”
“Thanks, baby.” Aria stood on tiptoe, pressing a kiss to Nash’s cheek. “Make sure Felicity eats something other than a bagel. Fruit or something healthy.”
“Got it,” Nash said, moving into the kitchen.
***
Minutes later, Aria and Melody were settled on the patio in the late September morning sunshine, two s
teaming mugs of coffee with extra cream clasped in hand.
It was a gorgeous day—bright, but not too warm, with a crisp, clean scent in the air that promised autumn wasn’t too far away—and Melody felt her spirits lift. With sun on her face and someone who loved her ready to listen, her problems suddenly seemed smaller than they had a few hours ago.
“So what’s up?” Aria asked, drawing her feet up into her chair. “Did the audition go badly?”
“No, it went fine,” Melody said, feeling a little shy about the nature of her questions now that the time had come to ask them. “Better than fine, really. I think I’ve got a decent chance. There are more people auditioning this weekend, and then they’re going to let everyone know who got the job on Monday.”
“Awesome.” Aria took a sip of her coffee. “But there’s something else bothering you that’s not awesome.”
Melody nodded.
“So…” Aria lifted one thin brow.
Melody sighed. “You have to promise not to tell Lark or Mom or Dad.”
“Done,” Aria said without hesitation, but Melody wasn’t surprised. She had always been able to trust Aria with a secret.
“Well, there’s this guy,” Melody said, rushing on when Aria grinned. “It’s not anything serious. Well, I guess it kind of is, or could have been, if I hadn’t… He’s kind of…” She blew a breath out through pursed lips. “It’s complicated.”
“Why?” Aria asked, still smiling. “You obviously like him.”
“I do.”
“That’s great,” Aria said. “You deserve a nice guy after all the losers Nana set you up with.”
Melody sighed again. “Well, you see, that’s the thing. He isn’t really a nice guy. I mean, he’s nice, but he’s also…bad.”
Aria’s forehead wrinkled. “Bad. In what way?”
“He’s kind of a bad boy,” Melody said. “You know, alternative lifestyle, doesn’t want to date a girl he thinks is a goody two-shoes, prefers to hook up with women who aren’t virgins…”
Aria set her coffee down with a hard thunk, her expression suddenly dead serious. “Are you talking about Nick?”
Melody rolled her eyes. “No,” she lied unconvincingly. “I’m not talking about Nick.”
“You’re totally talking about Nick. I’ve seen the way you two make googly eyes at each other in the kitchen. Nick is off limits, Melody,” Aria said in a stern, big-sisterly tone. “He’s Nash’s brother. If you make Nash beat up his own brother to avenge my baby sister’s honor, I will be very, very annoyed with you.”
“Nash isn’t going to have to beat anyone up,” Melody said, bristling. “And who says I want my honor avenged? Maybe I’m tired of following the rules all the time.”
Aria blinked, clearly shocked for a moment, but she recovered quickly. “Are you sure, Mel? I mean, you’ve always been pretty intent on waiting for marriage.”
Melody shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m just…confused. That’s why I wanted to talk. You had a wild phase and you ended up with a wonderful guy in the end.”
Aria nodded slowly. “I did. But I got hurt a lot along the way.”
“So you regret being with someone other than Nash?” Melody asked.
Aria shook her head. “No, I don’t. Every failed relationship made me the person I am, someone who can love and appreciate Nash in a way I wouldn’t have if I hadn’t been with those other guys, but… I just hate to think of you being hurt.”
“I know,” Melody said, cradling her mug in her hands, wondering why she felt so disappointed. Aria was making sense, the logical part of her brain knew that.
“Guys who don’t want a ‘good girl’ for a girlfriend usually have their reasons for it,” Aria added gently. “And they’re usually not nice ones. You might think you’re okay with having a fling with Nick, but how are you going to feel when he calls it off a few weeks after you start sleeping together? Or if he doesn’t even bother to officially end it, just stops calling and then a few days later you see him out with another girl? That’s what happens with guys like Nick.”
Melody set her coffee down. “But Aria, I really don’t think it would be that way. The way he makes me feel… When we kiss it’s like…fireworks. I’ve never felt fireworks. Ever. And I know he feels the same way.”
Aria made a pained face. “So you’ve already slept with him?”
“No,” Melody said, dropping her eyes to her lap, embarrassed. “He found out I was a virgin and backed off. He said I was a beautiful girl who deserves a beautiful first time and he wasn’t the type of guy for me and blah blah blah and then he left.”
Aria was quiet for a long time. Finally Melody looked up to see a thoughtful expression on her sister’s face.
“What?” Melody asked. “Should I be mortified? I’m kind of mortified.”
“No, you shouldn’t be mortified,” Aria said, then fell quiet again.
“So?” Melody prodded after another minute passed in silence. “What do you think? Should I give up on him? Do you think his mind is really made up?”
“I think…” Aria pressed her lips together for a moment before continuing. “I think I’m torn.”
“Torn how?”
“As my sister, I feel compelled to give you one kind of advice, but if we were just friends, I’d say something different.”
“Pretend we’re friends,” Melody said, laughing when Aria narrowed her eyes in mock anger. “You know what I mean. Of course we’re friends, but pretend we’re just friends.”
“Okay, but as your sister, I feel compelled to tell you not to take what I’m about to tell you too seriously,” Aria said, then added in a confidential tone. “I think he likes you. Like, really likes you.”
Melody’s eyebrows lifted. “Really?”
“Really,” Aria said. “And I don’t think he’s as wild as he pretends to be. I mean, a real bad boy wouldn’t care if you were a virgin, and he certainly wouldn’t care about protecting you from guys like him.”
“I hadn’t thought of it that way,” Melody said, biting her lip. “I’m pretty into him. I think it may be more than a crush, you know?”
“I think he’s into you, too, but like I said, I wouldn’t take that too seriously. You’d still be playing with fire. If he’s that spooked by what he’s feeling, it would make for a rocky start to a relationship.”
Melody fought the urge to smile. “I’m okay with rocky starts.”
Aria held up a hand in the universal sign for ‘slow down.’ “I could be wrong, you know. Remember that.”
“I know,” Melody said, even as she really, really hoped Aria was right.
“And you should take it slow,” Aria admonished. “See if you two have anything in common aside from wanting to get naked and sweaty together.”
“Ew,” Melody said, her prudish side lifting its head. “Don’t be gross, Ra.”
“I can’t help it,” Aria said with an evil grin. “It’s my nature. Could be his nature, too. He might skeeve you out long term.”
Melody lifted one shoulder, feigning a casualness she didn’t feel. “I don’t think so. I think he has the opposite effect on me.”
Aria laughed beneath her breath. “Oh, man. You do have it bad. Just promise me you’ll be careful, okay? Use protection. Lots of it.”
Melody’s cheeks heated. “Yeah, yeah, I know.”
“If mentioning birth control makes you blush, I’m thinking you should wait on the nasty for a while,” Aria said. “Don’t you?”
“Talking about it with my sister makes me blush,” Melody said, lifting her nose in the air. “But I’ve been on the pill for almost two years.”
“Really?” Aria’s cocked her head. “Brian?”
“Brian and I talked about taking the next step a few times, so I went to Dr. Miller and got the prescription. It helped even out my cycle so I stayed on it, but…” Melody shrugged. “But in the end it never felt right with Brian.”
“But Nick feels right after knowing him less than a m
onth?” Aria was careful to keep judgment from her tone, but Melody felt judged all the same.
“I’m not sure,” Melody said. “I just know I’ve never felt anything like what I feel when I’m with him, and I don’t want to lose my chance at that because I’m trying to live up to someone else’s idea of who I’m supposed to be. I’m only twenty-two. I’m still growing up, you know. It’s okay for me to change…right?”
Aria reached across the table and took her hand. “Of course it’s okay for you to change. You don’t have to be Nana or even Mom’s idea of perfect for people to love you, you know.”
“Sometimes it doesn’t feel that way,” Melody said, squeezing Aria’s hand. “Sometimes it feels like everyone has their mind made up about me and there’s no changing it. It’s like I’m expected to be sweet, baby sister Melody forever. And sometimes I like that, but sometimes… I don’t know.” She let out an audible breath. “I’m so confused.”
“And that’s okay, too,” Aria said with a smile. “The early twenties are all about being confused. It’s normal.”
Melody wrinkled her nose. “Still feels pretty cruddy.”
“But exciting, right?”
Melody laughed and nodded. “Yeah. Exciting, too.”
“Nash told you I was wise.” Aria stood, dropping a kiss to the top of Melody’s head before grabbing their coffee cups. “You ready for a refill before more chat?”
Melody pushed back her chair. “I think I’m good on chat, but I’ll take more coffee and a bagel. Then I need some Aunt Melody time with Felicity. I’ve been missing her.”
“You’re welcome to babysit anytime,” Aria said, heading for the back door. “Nash and I never turn down a chance to be alone.”
“To get hot and sweaty,” Melody added, making Aria laugh as she spun around.
“Touché.” She lifted a considering brow. “You are getting naughty in your old age, aren’t you?”
“We’ll see.” Melody shrugged and led the way inside, feeling a hundred times better. She was still almost as confused as she’d been before her talk with her sister, but at least she felt like someone understood what she was going through and was rooting for a happy ending.
Wild For You (Always a Bridesmaid 3) Page 4
