by Jayce Ellis
“She’s the RA at my dorm.”
Of course she was. Jaq didn’t remember seeing her the day T’d moved in, but that entire thing had been a whirlwind. He massaged the bridge of his nose and sat back. “How’d you get involved with your RA?”
Tanisha let her head fall in her hands. “That first day, she was walking down the hall, and...” She shrugged. “That was it for me.” She paused then, sobering up. “I shouldn’t have left, and I’m sure I’ll hear a lecture about the ‘real world’ and how I can’t always run away, but I just couldn’t deal.”
Ahh, young love. Jaq leaned over and kissed the top of her head. “You don’t ever need to justify coming home. I’m the last one to give out any lectures, and I’ll keep Gran off your case. You stay as long as you want, so long as you don’t miss classes.”
“Umm, Dad?” Tanisha’s voice pitched higher. “I know you work with her dad and all, but can you not—”
He mimed zipping his mouth. “I won’t say a word.”
She nodded, and Gran came back through with Jaq’s meal. She thought microwaves were tools of the devil, eschewing them in favor of oven reheating. He agreed, but he’d forgotten all about eating. Now that the scent wafted up to him, though, he was starving. And it was nearly two, and he had to be back to work in six hours.
“Thanks, Gran,” he said. She smiled softly and kissed the top of his head the way he’d done T’s. Huh, so that’s where he got it from.
Tanisha stuck around for a bit longer before excusing herself and padding down the hall in the flip-flops Gran always threatened to burn. Once she was gone, Gran turned a knowing smile on him. “So was I right? She fall in love?”
“Hard and fast.” Not that he could blame her. For all he told himself he wouldn’t fall, wouldn’t succumb, would be cool with just some mind-blowing sex, he was halfway there with Matt too. Visions of the night they’d just shared in the office rushed to the fore, and he had to push them back. He’d get to relive those memories soon, in his bedroom, in private.
“Whatchu thinking about? It’s not just T.” Not a statement, and thank goodness she couldn’t see how his skin burned at the question. But the look on her face made it clear she knew exactly where his mind was, and there was no sense in not being honest.
“You remember the guy who stopped by the other day?”
“The one who looked like he couldn’t decide whether he wanted to hug you or spank you? Mmm. I remember.”
“That’s...gross, Ma. Where do you come up with this stuff?” She didn’t answer, instead waving her hand impatiently for him to keep going. He’d look up remedies for bleaching the words from his brain later. “He’s Angela’s father.”
Gran cackled. Just straight up pulled an Ursula on him, clutching her belly while she threw her head back and laughed. “That’s classic.”
He shook his head, unable to stop a chuckle of his own from falling out. “You done yet?” She didn’t stop laughing so he kept talking. “I’m thinking it’s not a good idea to get involved with him under the circumstances.”
“Bullshit.”
She went from laughing to deadly serious so quickly it brought him to a full stop. “What?”
“Bull. Shit. Tanisha is going through what all teenagers do in college—hell, in life. Their first breakup, their first heartache, whatever. Tanisha will be all right. Don’t you base your prospects on a teenager’s drama.”
“It’s not that easy.”
“The hell it’s not. Let Tanisha live her own life. You live yours. If that life is with this girl’s father, Tanisha will learn to deal.” Gran leaned across the table and took Jaq’s hand in hers. “Son, I never wanted you to end up a father so young, but you did. You’ve done all you can for that girl, and Tanisha has a good head on her shoulders. Enjoy life. If that man who came by does it for you, enjoy it. Enjoy him.”
He sucked in a breath. Gran was right, he knew it. Tanisha would lick her wounds for a few days and jump right back on that horse. It’s what she’d always done. Resilient as fuck, his girl.
“You’re right, Gran.”
“I know I am.” She squeezed his hand again and let go, then stood up and walked down the hall to her room, leaving him alone with his swirling thoughts and a too-bright house.
Chapter Eleven
Matt groaned as his phone buzzed. The volume was off, and he’d once tried keeping it entirely silent. That had resulted in a deal almost falling through, so now he kept it on vibrate. And his thigh had been in electroshock therapy from the moment he sat down.
Things with Kingsley were progressing well, and he’d come back to Fredericksburg for a few days. He’d spent a full day cooped up in Nichole’s office, poring over the proposed designs and giving updates running interference between her and Patti, who was understandably anxious to get the designs approved and off her plate. Then he’d had the pleasure of soothing the ruffled feathers of people who were used to Matt responding within twenty-four hours—no matter how many hours he had to work to make that happen—and now were furious about waiting forty-eight. Suffice it to say there was little he wanted to do more than go home and crawl in bed.
A mess. He didn’t even know where home was. His actual house was only twenty minutes away, but without Spitfire, who was staying with Kennie again, it was desolate. He wasn’t cut out for living alone.
The thought brought him up short, even as his thigh vibrated again. Was that why he’d become possibly even more estranged from the kids after the divorce? Sure, Halo was mad, but she was mad at both parents. Matt, though, had wanted to push when she wasn’t ready, and now he could admit it was for his own need to have someone near, and it had set their relationship back. Josh and Natalie had both been in college already and, if Nat was to be believed, had seen the writing on the way of his and Di’s relationship before they’d left. He’d maintained a decent relationship with them, but they’d both left the state for college, and it wasn’t quite the same.
His phone rang one more time, and he resolved to get back to work. Then his office phone rang. Jesus Christ. He checked the caller ID and saw Di’s name. Matt frowned. Di had rarely called him at the office when they were married. They’d been good about calling for emergencies only, and he hadn’t heard from her since he’d insisted on actual pricing for Josh’s caterer. He picked up.
“Hey, Di, what’s wrong?”
“I figured you weren’t answering your phone in general and it wasn’t a personal slight on me.”
Matt wasn’t on it enough to have different ringtones for people. He didn’t even know how to change them. “Of course not. What’s wrong?” he asked again.
“When was the last time you spoke to Angela?”
He was sure she already knew the answer, so why did he feel like a recalcitrant teenager answering? “Parents Weekend.”
This was when he expected Di to scold him for not seeing Halo enough, but it never came. “I’ve only seen her once this year,” she said, and her voice trailed off.
Matt pulled the phone from his ear and stared at it, then straightened in his chair, even though there was no one to see him. “Diane, what’s going on that you’re not telling me?”
Di was silent for a minute, then sighed. “She was supposed to come down last weekend for the bridesmaid fitting. We were all going to go out afterward. She hasn’t met any of the other bridesmaids and we thought it’d be a good bonding experience. She bailed at the last minute and asked us to send her dress up there.”
“That doesn’t necessarily mean anything,” Matt said slowly. “She could just be busy. It’s almost midterms. And homecoming. You know she’s an RA. Halo’s got a lot going on.”
Another noisy breath blew through the phone. “I know. I know all that, but she’s not answering the phone and I don’t have time to get up there. Erik and I had plans to—” This time she cut herself off.
“You and Erik have plans,” Matt finished for her. “You want me to check on Halo and make sure nothing more serious is going on?”
“Yes, please. Will you, Mattie?”
Di must genuinely be worried if she was calling him Mattie, her affectionate pet name for him at the beginning of their relationship and few years of the marriage. By the time it ended he’d been strictly Matthew. It’d only been in the past year that she even said Matt, and her reversion to Mattie told him more than her words that she was concerned. Not just about the dress fitting, but that there was something more going on, and she was trying not to speculate.
“It’s homecoming this weekend, but I’ll reach out. I’ll try again next week if I don’t catch her.”
She hummed through the phone. Homecoming was out of control, and no one could be surprised if she didn’t want to spare time for her dad during it. Di said thanks and they disconnected, and Matt slouched back in his chair.
He’d planned to spend the weekend in his apartment with nothing but Spitfire for company, and maybe catch up on some rest. He was sure Halo was fine, but he couldn’t dismiss the worry in Diane’s voice. He shot a quick text to Halo to see if she had time to meet before the festivities got started, and was surprised by the quick but positive response, asking him if he’d come to her gown fitting. Great. That was taken care of, and a warmth spread through him at the thought of spending more quality time with her.
Matt managed to work for another hour before packing up and heading home. He sent Kennie a message to see if she’d be cool keeping Spitfire for a few days. She responded by texting a picture of him lying contently on her lap, watching TV. Traitor.
Work and his family temporarily taken care of, Matt let his thoughts turn to JaQuan. The taste of him in Matt’s mouth, the need etched across his face, the strain as he fought for his release. The wide-eyed moan when Matt came on his chest. He got off on Matt being bossy, telling him what to do, and giving him permission to revel in it.
The thought made him hard again, but he had no desire to get himself off at the office. And with Spitfire settled with Kendra for a minute, he had no real need to go back to DC before the weekend. But the thought of Jaq, naked and sprawled and waiting for him, was enough for him to pack up and head to the house.
He wondered how Jaq felt about phone sex. Only one way to find out.
* * *
Jaq sighed with something like relief when he got home. The lights weren’t all on, so Tanisha was back on campus. He hadn’t been lying when he said she was welcome home anytime, but he wasn’t exactly comfortable telling her he’d hooked up with the father of the woman who’d dumped her, and had every intention of doing it again. He’d been close-lipped when she teased him about what he did in his spare time, and he hated that. Gran kept telling him to be honest and, to be fair, T seemed to be doing better. The weekends, where Angela was seemingly everywhere in their dorm, were hard, she said. Those were the days she escaped to the safety of the house. The rest of the time she’d turned into a workaholic, just like him, holing up in dance studios and practicing more than was probably good for her.
He walked up the front steps and let himself into a quiet living room. The only sounds came from Gran’s room, so she must’ve set up an early dinner and gone to rest. A note in the kitchen confirmed it. Jaq heated up the meal she’d left for him—in the microwave—and sat down just as his phone dinged.
Carlton: homecoming this weekend! My boy’ll be here in two days. What we doin?
Lawrence: Really, that last g was going to kill you?
Carlton: ur one of those huh? That do full sentences and shit in text?
Lawrence: Good grammar is not a crime.
Carlton: u sound like my gram. How old is you again? Neways, what we doinG?
Carlton being an ass for the fuck of it had Jaq laughing as he typed out his response.
Me: I’m down for whatever, as long as it’s 21+. Not trying to see my kid on campus.
Carlton: same. Stadium might have something going on.
Stadium was a strip club. They always had something going on.
Lawrence: We can’t find anything a bit more mature than Stadium?
Carlton: the fuck for? It’s homecoming. Ain’t shit about to be mature.
He made an excellent point. They had all year to be mature. Homecoming was not the time.
Me: Can’t believe I’m saying this, but I agree with Carlton.
Lawrence: Blasphemy. But fine, Stadium it is.
It went quiet for a minute, and Jaq let himself imagine Matt there next to him, his hand moving over him, pressing into him. Wanting him. He closed his eyes to the memory of Matt hovering beside him on the couch, commanding him to come while he watched, being so hard he couldn’t hold himself back. God. Jaq had fantasized about it, but his imagination didn’t hold a candle to the reality.
“That boy got you sprung,” Gran said from the doorway, startling Jaq so much that he knocked his water over, then scrambled to grab his phone. She didn’t seem a bit fazed. “You kids still using that word, or am I showing my age?”
Jaq’s brain was still on the fritz. He stood in front of the table, gripping the edge, phone safely tucked in his pocket. Gran chuckled, the sound of her slippers slapping against the linoleum kitchen floor jarring. “Guess I don’t care much what word y’all use. That’s what you are. Sprung.”
“Mom,” he croaked, “stop. Please.”
And there she went again with the Ursula-ing.
He straightened up and scooted past her to grab some paper towels from the counter. “That wasn’t Matt. Some guys I’m planning homecoming with.”
She hummed, her eyes curious. “You mentioned meeting up with some friends before. Tell me about them.”
Gran had always wanted him to get out more. She’d told him that his rationale for not dating while Tanisha was growing up was bullshit, but had otherwise kept quiet. Now she was smiling, and that made him smile. He sat back down and told her about Carlton and Lawrence, and what they had tentatively planned, breaking down when she pressed him about the location.
“Good,” she said, that approving grin still stretched across her face. “You need to get out more. But I know going out to watch some girl jiggle her tits doesn’t do it for you. That ain’t why you look so happy. You’re thinking about that man again.”
If Jaq could crawl under the table, he absolutely would have. His mother had zero chill when it came to his sex life. “Can we please not talk about this? Why are you out of bed anyway?”
“My pills.” She padded over to the counter and grabbed her pill organizer, shook out her evening doses, and swallowed them down with the last bit of water still left in the cup Jaq’d spilled.
He watched her with fondness. After he’d dropped Tanisha off at school, he’d planned to figure out what he wanted to do next. At the top of his list had been to move out. Not that he and Gran had problems, but he was thirty-five and had never lived on his own. She’d been a rock from the time he’d tearfully brought Sara home, and hadn’t wavered in her devotion to him or Tanisha since. But she’d also given up a part of her own freedom to make sure they were okay, and she deserved to do her own thing too. She could take care of herself, and Tanisha could still always come back. Still, that mental shift in perspective wasn’t linear by a long shot, and more than a few times he’d thought there was no sense in changing what worked and staying right where he was.
Jaq sighed as a soft, slightly weathered hand caressed his face. Gran waited unti
l he looked up before she spoke. “I’m going to bed now. You get you some rest too, okay?”
“Yes, ma’am.” She bent over and he kissed her cheek, and she walked back toward her bedroom. God but he loved her.
No sense in staying up. It was only ten, but Jaq shut off the few remaining lights and headed to his own room. He’d just crawled under the covers when his phone rang, this time for a video call. Matt, whom he hadn’t heard from since going down to his home office a few days back.
He cleared his throat and tried to look half-ass decent before he answered. “Hey, how’s it going?”
Matt rumbled low in his throat. “You in bed?”
“Yeah, just got in. How’s it going there?”
“Okay. Been meaning to call for a few days, but folks realized I was back and I’ve been slammed since.”
Jaq chuckled. He knew that feeling. “It’s not a problem.” Not entirely true, because he’d missed seeing Matt’s face, the not-quite-hidden appraisal every time their paths crossed. But he got it. Work was work, and he’d been deep in staying on top of their other collections while they waited for the final approval from Matt’s boss.
“You disappeared on me for a minute. Where’d your mind go?”
Jaq cleared his throat. Matt knew he was into him. The way he’d acted at the office—doing what Matt wanted without a second thought—was proof of that.
“JaQuan? I’m getting a little concerned over here.”
God, the way Matt said his name. Jaq went for it. “If we were together, dating, whatever...” He paused at the way Matt’s lips tilted in a smile. “Would it be like this? Long-distance during the week and seeing each other on the weekends?”
Matt hummed, looking like he was momentarily distracted, and Jaq realized the sheet had fallen, exposing his chest. He grinned. “Matt? You listening?”
“I’m listening. I’m also looking. You’re delicious.” He sobered up and looked at him. “I’d assume so. Your job keeps you on location and mine pretty much does too. I can certainly do a good bit of it remotely, but housing prices up there are atrocious and—”
