“Anyway, just so you know, it’s planned for next Saturday night, and Mom’s pretending that she’s just having you and Gil for dinner. But she’ll make Gil leave as soon as he gets there. Poor Gil doesn’t even know what’s up.”
“All this attention …” Lelani sighed. “It’s a little overwhelming.”
“At least it will be over soon.”
Lelani counted the days left on her fingers. “Just eighteen days until I’m Mrs. Gil Mendez.”
“You’re not going to hyphenate your name?”
Lelani firmly shook her head. “No. I’m old-fashioned that way.”
“That will please my parents.”
“And Gil will adopt Emma, and she’ll be a Mendez too.” Lelani glanced at Emma, who was chewing on the ear of her bunny. “Emma Lolana Mendez.”
“Pretty. Is Lolana Hawaiian?”
Lelani nodded. “It means ‘soar.’ I guess I hoped it would give her wings.”
“With you and Gil as parents, I bet she will soar.”
Lelani reached over and squeezed Anna’s hand on the gear-shift knob. “Having Auntie Anna and such caring grandparents will help a lot too.”
Anna nodded, but her eyes were sad.
“You haven’t seemed yourself lately, Anna. I know I keep bugging you about it, but is something wrong?”
Anna glanced her way and smiled. “No, I was just thinking.”
“Thinking?”
“Thinking how lucky Gil and you are to have found each other. And Emma too. I mean, do you ever consider how easily you and Gil might not have met? What if you hadn’t answered the ad for Kendall’s house? Or what if I hadn’t? Then we wouldn’t have met. You wouldn’t have met Gil. And none of this would be happening.”
“That is interesting, isn’t it? I remember regretting it at first. I mean renting a room from Kendall. But then I got to know you guys … and Gil. It was almost as if the whole thing was ordained, like God had a hand in bringing us together.”
“Do you really believe that?”
“Which part?”
“That God had a hand in it? I mean, do you honestly believe that God has time to get that personally involved in our lives?”
“It’s still something I’m working on, the concept that God cares about someone as insignificant as I am.”
Anna chuckled as she pulled into her parents’ driveway. “Insignificant is not a word that my brother would use for you. In fact, I wouldn’t either.”
Anna helped Lelani gather Emma’s things from the car, and then they both went up to the house.
“Here she is,” declared Mrs. Mendez as they all entered the house. “My little angel girl has arrived.” She extended her arms, and Emma leaned toward her.
“Thank you again for having her,” Lelani said as she handed Emma over. She always had mixed feelings during this exchange. On one hand she was hugely relieved that Emma was glad to visit here. On the other hand, Lelani wished she didn’t have to leave her.
“Anna,” her mother said in a conspiring way. “I need to talk to you.”
Anna rolled her eyes at Lelani but followed her mother into the kitchen, where they talked in hushed tones.
“Hello, Lelani,” said Mr. Mendez as he came in from downstairs. “How is my favorite daughter-in-law to be?”
“I’m doing well. Thank you. How are you?”
“I’m on my way to the restaurant to iron out some squabble with the help.” He took a set of keys from the bowl by the front door. “Two waitresses in love with the same cook.” He shook his head. “It could get messy.”
“Good luck,” she called as he hurried on his way.
Just then her phone rang. Hoping it was Gil calling to solidify their plans for this evening, she answered quickly.
“Lelani? Lelani Porter?”
A shock wave ran through her as she recognized the voice. But then she told herself, No, it couldn’t be. “This is Lelani Porter,” she said stiffly. “Who’s calling?”
“It’s Ben.”
Her knees felt weak. Not in a good way, but more like she was going to be sick. She reached for a nearby chair, easing herself down.
“I’m sorry to catch you off guard like this.”
“How did you get this number?” she asked icily.
“Your mother.”
She leaned over, holding her phone with one hand and her head with the other.
“How are you doing, Lelani?”
She wanted to say something horrid and mean. She wanted to ask him how he dared to call her after all they’d been through. More than that, she wanted to hang up. Instead, she asked, “What do you want?”
“To talk to you. To see how you’re doing, what you’re doing. I’ve been thinking about you and—”
“This isn’t a good time,” she said.
“When would be—”
“I’m sorry, but I have to go.” She snapped her phone closed just as Anna emerged from the kitchen.
“Are you okay?” Anna asked as she came over and stared at Lelani with wide eyes.
She just nodded.
“You look like you don’t feel well.”
“Are we ready to go?” Lelani hurried toward the kitchen area. Gil’s mother was just putting Emma into the highchair.
“Emma was acting hungry,” Mrs. Mendez said a bit sheepishly. “I thought I’d offer her some peaches.”
“That’s nice,” Lelani said woodenly. “But we should probably go now.”
She waved her hand at them. “Yes, by all means, you two girls get going.”
Lelani still felt slightly sick when they got outside. Her head was hot and fuzzy and she honestly wondered if she was going to throw up.
“Lelani?” Anna asked as they both stood by the car. “Are you okay? Seriously, you don’t look well.”
Lelani placed both hands on the hood of the car and leaned forward, trying to breathe deeply, willing herself to relax. Anna stood by her, waiting.
“I’m sorry, Anna.” Lelani took in another deep breath and felt tears running down her cheeks now. “I just need a minute, okay?”
“Okay.”
Lelani took in several more calming breaths, then listened to the sound of the birds in the trees, felt the gentle, warm breeze blowing on her face, and finally turned to Anna. “I’m sorry. I must seem like a basket case.”
“You seem very sick or upset or something.”
“Let’s get in the car and I’ll tell you about it as you drive, okay?”
Anna nodded and soon they were both in the car. Lelani calmly told Anna about the phone call. “I don’t know why I felt so blindsided by it. It’s not as if Ben were dead, although in my mind, I think I convinced myself that he was.”
“What did he want?” Anna’s voice had an edge to it. Perhaps it was concern for Gil.
“I have no idea. But I told him it wasn’t a good time to talk. I wish I’d just told him that no time was a good time and that I never want to hear from him again.”
“Is that how you feel?”
Lelani saw that Anna was frowning. “Yes, of course. I have absolutely no interest in him.”
“But he is Emma’s father.”
“Biologically.”
“Yes, but—”
“Gil is Emma’s father. Gil is the man I love. And if I never saw or heard of Ben again, I would be perfectly happy.” Lelani’s hands clenched into fists. “The truth is, I actually hate him. It doesn’t feel good to hate anyone. But I feel hatred toward him, and I can’t believe he called.”
“How did he know how to reach you?”
Her fists grew tighter. “My mother.”
“Do you think she contacted him?” Anna’s dark eyes looked angry.
“But why?”
“Maybe to upset things right before your wedding?”
“She’s a mean, miserable woman, but it’s hard to imagine she’d go that far out of her way to stir things up for me over here.”
“Stranger things have happened.”
“I suppose.” Lelani took in another slow, calming breath.
“So what are you going to do?”
“What do you mean? What can I do?”
“Suppose he wants to see you. Or maybe he wants to be involved in Emma’s life. Or what if he wants to share custody?”
“Oh, Anna!” Lelani leaned her head back and groaned. “No, that can’t be what he wants.”
“But what if he did?”
“Then I would fight him.”
“What if he is in cahoots with your mother, Lelani, to get Emma back to Hawaii?”
“Oh, I really don’t think—”
“Yes, you’re right. That’s pretty far-fetched.” Anna shook her head. “I’m always reading those suspense books, you know. Edmond has warned me that they can mess with my mind.”
Even so, Anna’s words put a real fear into Lelani’s heart. What if Ben had been talking to Lelani’s mother? Alana could be very convincing when she wanted something badly enough. What if she somehow made Ben believe that it was his responsibility to rescue Emma and bring her back to Hawaii? No, that was ridiculous and not even worth thinking about. And yet …
“So what are you going to do?” Anna persisted. “You could go into call history and call him back and read him the riot act. Tell him to stay out of your life and—”
“I don’t think it would be wise to anger him.”
“Yes, you’re probably right,” Anna conceded.
“But it might not hurt to set him straight.” Lelani reached for her phone. “I can tell him that I’m about to be married to the most wonderful man on the planet. I’ll explain that Emma is thriving and that I’m going to finish med school and that I have found family and friends and a fulfilling life here in Oregon.”
“Yes!” Anna nodded vigorously. “Do that.”
“I will,” Lelani declared. “But if you don’t mind, I’ll wait until we get to Kendall’s sister’s house.”
“Sure. Whatever.”
That’s just what Lelani did. After Anna parked and went inside, Lelani remained in the car, searched for the number, and then hit redial.
“I’m glad you called back.” Ben’s voice was as calm as it had been when they were dating, back when he had smoothly concealed from her the fact that he was married. “So tell me how you really are, Lelani. I’ve missed you.”
“I’m doing very well,” she began in a formal tone. “I’m getting married in a couple of weeks, and I’ll be finishing my medical degree, and my daughter is delightful. Life is good. Very, very good.”
“Getting married?”
“Yes. A wonderful man who loves me and Emma and wants to—”
“Ah, but do you love him, Lelani?”
“Of course I love him. I wouldn’t marry him if I didn’t.”
“But being a single mother …” He sighed. “I always assumed that you’d given the baby up.”
“You were wrong.”
“Yes, on many levels.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” she snapped at him.
“This isn’t a conversation I want to have on the phone, Lelani.”
“I’m sorry, but that’s the only way we’re going to have it.”
“But can’t I just see you? And the baby too?”
All kinds of alarms went off in Lelani. The last thing she needed was a face-to-face confrontation with this ghost from her past. What could he be thinking? How dare he even suggest it? She suddenly remembered the ocean that separated them. “You do know that I live on the mainland now, don’t you?”
“Yes. Your mother mentioned Oregon.”
“So, you see, a face-to-face—”
“That’s why I called. I’m at a medical conference in Portland for the next few days and I had hoped—”
“I don’t know why you’re doing this, Ben. I really don’t want any part of it. Don’t you understand? You hurt me deeply and you are a part of my life that’s over and gone, dead. Can’t you get that?”
“So you refuse to see me?”
Lelani didn’t know what to say.
“And you refuse to let me see my child?”
“I don’t know, Ben. This is all so confusing and hard.”
“I don’t want to hurt you, Lelani. In fact, I mostly want to tell you I’m sorry.”
She closed her eyes and clutched the phone tighter. Why this? Why now?
“But if you refuse to—”
“Let me think about this, Ben. I’ll get back to you, okay?”
“Okay.” He sounded hopeful.
“I want to talk to my fiancé and get his opinion.”
There was silence now.
“Because I love him, Ben. I love Gil and I am going to marry him.”
“So you said. But as I recall you said that you loved me once too.”
“That was another lifetime ago.”
“And I was married.”
“And you lied to me.”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
“I really need to go now.”
“Just one more thing, Lelani.”
“What?”
“I’m not married now.”
Lelani just shook her head. What difference did it make? What difference did he think it would make? Even if got down on his knees and crawled across broken glass to beg her to take him back, she would not. She got out of the car, then reached into the backseat for her purse and noticed Emma’s bunny had fallen on the floor. As she retrieved the bunny, she realized something on a level that really hadn’t ever hit her before: The man she’d just been talking to, the man she’d just told off in no uncertain terms, the man she had once loved and slept with, was also Emma’s father.
But really, what difference should that make?
Twenty-one
Megan
Megan noticed Lelani had finally arrived, but she didn’t come into the great room where Kendall’s sister Kate had set up the bridal-shower festivities. Instead, she lurked around the edges of the party. Perhaps she couldn’t see a place to sit, since the women were packed in there like sardines. Apparently Kendall’s family had lots of friends. But after a while, Megan realized that Lelani looked seriously troubled. Megan got up and made her way across the noisy room to find out.
“Are you okay?” Megan asked quietly.
“Did Anna tell you?”
Megan shook her head. “What?”
Lelani grabbed Megan’s arm and pulled her into the quiet foyer. “Ben, Emma’s biological father, just called.”
“Why?”
“He’s in Portland and wants to see me.”
“Oh.” Megan didn’t know what to say.
Lelani folded her arms tightly across her front with a scowl. “I don’t want to see him, Megan. I don’t!”
“What are you going to do?”
“I have no idea.” Lelani looked close to tears.
Megan put a hand on her shoulder. “You know that if there’s anything I can do to help, just—”
“Will you go with me to see him?” Lelani said urgently. “I think maybe I could do it if I had someone for moral support.”
“Shouldn’t Gil go with—”
“I thought of that already, but I’m not sure it’s a good idea. Ben is older and he sort of tries to control situations and, trust me, he knows how to do it. In fact, I think I’m just realizing that he’s very manipulative. I can’t stand the thought of Ben doing or saying anything to hurt Gil or p
ut him down.”
“But Gil is such a great guy, I don’t see how—”
“You don’t know Ben. I’ve seen him cut other guys to shreds and then smile as if it were nothing.”
Megan frowned. “This was the man you once loved?”
“I didn’t see him like that in the beginning. In the beginning I was under his spell, mesmerized.”
Megan nodded sadly.
“But I can’t bear to see Ben do that to Gil.”
“I can understand.”
“But maybe you’re right. Maybe I should at least ask Gil if he wants to come with me.”
“Maybe.” Megan wasn’t so sure. What if this Ben character really was mean and evil and vile? He certainly sounded like a nasty person. And why was he so eager to see Lelani anyway?
“I just know that I can’t see him alone, Megan.”
“And I don’t think you should.”
“I’ll talk to Gil, but I’d still like you to come with me, if you’re willing.”
“Sure, I’ll go with you.” But even as Megan said this, she wondered if it was such a good idea. “You figure things out with Gil and let me know what the plan is.”
“But first we better go in there and participate in Kendall’s shower.” Lelani took a deep breath and made an attempt at a smile.
“Kendall’s sisters really are something else,” Megan said in a hushed tone. “I know she can use our support.”
“Thanks for your willingness to help me with Ben,” Lelani whispered. “You have no idea how much I appreciate it.”
Megan nodded and wished she felt as confident as she was trying to appear, but the truth was, she was not looking forward to meeting this creep. She wished she’d been able to tell Lelani as much. And yet, she wondered how she would feel if the tables were turned and she needed Lelani’s help. Besides, she reminded herself, she was Lelani’s maid of honor. Perhaps her responsibilities included telling off old beaus and sending them packing.
Megan had not exaggerated about Kendall’s older sisters. They made their jabs and took their pokes in a subtle, socially acceptable way, but always at Kendall’s expense. At one point, as they were standing by the refreshment table, Kim jokingly reminded Kendall and everyone within hearing distance that Kendall had been “judged mentally unstable” just last fall. Megan had to step in.
Three Weddings and a Bar Mitzvah Page 18
