Later, we perused the visitor’s center and gift shop, trying on various hats and sunglasses just for fun. We laughed a lot and it felt good. In the end, I purchased a calendar and Adrienne picked up a framed photo of the lighthouse at night, a sight I hoped to experience in person one day.
Next, we found a comfortable spot on top of some of the larger rocks along the shoreline and snacked on the assorted cheeses and fruit we’d brought with us from the stocked fridge back at the cottage. We stretched out on the rocks, staring up at the lighthouse as we discussed all aspects of life, updating one another on the details of family, friends, and even, touchy subject as it was, recent relationships.
“So how long were you together?” I asked.
She thought for a moment. “A little more than three months, I guess.” Adrienne was referencing her much publicized relationship with Rene Inglata, the fashion model.
“Who ended it?”
“I did. We had fun, but in the end, it just wasn’t there. There was always something missing.”
I nodded.
“Your turn,” she said. “Tell me about your last relationship.”
“What exactly constitutes a relationship?” I asked, watching the clouds move in the overcast sky above.
She looked over at me strangely. “Anyone you’d consider your girlfriend, I guess.”
“In that case, I guess I haven’t had any of those since you.”
“How is that possible? I’ve seen photos of you with lots of women. It’s okay to talk about it. I’m a big girl.”
“No, it’s not that. There were lots of women, there just wasn’t ever…one. I was working a lot and didn’t want the distraction. Relationships don’t coexist well with location shooting and extra long hours on set.” I looked at her knowingly. “Plus, when they don’t work out, it can be brutal.”
“So when you say lots, you mean—”
“Lots.” I emphasized the word reluctantly.
“Oh.” She took in the information. “So that’s where all the new moves came from.”
I blushed, embarrassed and a little saddened by that observation. “Adrienne, I’m not proud of the way I’ve carried on, and it’s being around you for these past few months that’s made me see that. I don’t want to be that person anymore.” Annoyingly, my BlackBerry chose that moment to interrupt and buzzed from the recesses of my pocket. I pulled it out and silenced it. Latham, I noted to myself before turning my attention back to Adrienne.
“You know, it doesn’t matter to me, your past, other women.” She took my hand and threaded her fingers through mine. “It doesn’t change who you are.”
“Thank you.” Another buzz. I glanced down, irritated. This time he’d sent a text message. Urgent. Call me.
Adrienne rested her chin on my shoulder, her brow furrowed as she peered down at the screen. “You should probably talk to him. I don’t think he’s going away.”
“It’ll just take a sec.” I stood and wandered a few yards away as I dialed. Never one to disappoint, Latham’s voice was as loud and obnoxious as ever upon answering.
“There you are! Sorry to bother you on your vacation, but we need to talk.”
“All right. What’s up?” I was suddenly nervous. Had something fallen through with the Elevation deal? I cursed myself for not signing the contract faster.
“I got a call today from your old Tenth Avenue director. He’s been given the green light by Warner Brothers to shoot Greystone.”
“The novel?
“That would be the bestselling novel, yes.”
“I thought the rights were tied up. Everyone and their brother have been trying to get their hands on that project.”
“It’s amazing what money can do, sweetheart. Warner Brothers now has it and they want to make it a double header and shoot the suckers in Rome. That’s two films, Jenna, and your director friend wants you in the lead. Don’t say anything; it gets better. The studio has subsequently seen the dailies from Second Life and they’re backing his decision one hundred percent. All you have to do is meet with them. Do you see where this is going?”
My mind was racing but my mouth was open in shock. “I think I’m getting there.”
“Well, let me make it simple. You just won the fucking lottery. This is what we’ve been waiting for. This is your chance to move into the Hollywood stratosphere. With a noteworthy director in place, who you already have a fantastic working relationship with, we’re talking fast-track to Oscarville. The scenario couldn’t be any better if we’d written it ourselves. You’ll be the new It-girl the second the news of your casting hits Variety.”
I was reeling. How had this happened? This was good news. Hell, this was great news, but it was a lot to process and I felt like I was a step behind. “Um, I can’t believe it. Talk this through with me. What are the negatives?”
“There are no negatives. That’s what I’m saying. Of course it would mean passing on Elevation, but Broadway’s not going anywhere.” He was right. It wasn’t. “You’d be tied up in Italy for the better part of a year, but there’s nowhere better to be tied up, trust me. Pasta up to your elbows.”
Whoa, Italy? I told my brain to shut up. I couldn’t allow myself to think about that part quite yet. I was still reveling in the idea that they wanted me, and how gratifying that felt. “It sounds great. I just…I need time to think, Latham.”
“No time. I need you to come back to the city tonight. The studio rep is in town and wants to have a dinner meeting. Make it happen.”
“Okay, well”—I checked my watch—“I guess I can be there in a few hours. I just need to get my things together. Text me the details of the meeting.”
I hung up and stared at my phone in mystification and triumph all wrapped into one.
“Going somewhere?” Adrienne’s voice immediately snapped me out of the daze I was in.
Shit, I thought as I came crashing back to Earth. Adrienne stood nearby, a quizzical look on her face, and I was reminded of the here and now. What was I thinking? I didn’t want to leave, not when I was finally back where I wanted to be—with Adrienne. I was struggling. “I don’t know. Something crazy just happened.” I walked back to the rocks and sat beside her.
She placed a reassuring hand on my knee. “Tell me what he said.”
I recounted the details of the conversation to Adrienne, hearing the excitement in my voice escalate as I spoke. She remained quiet throughout, nodding her head in all the appropriate spots. Finally, I turned to her. “What do you think?”
She kissed the back of my hand. “I’m amazed and so very proud of you. It’s wonderful.” But as she looked out at the surf, there was a distance behind her eyes that spoke volumes.
My voice dropped and I dipped my head, attempting to get her to look at me. “I didn’t say I was taking it.”
“I know that. You can’t possibly know what you’re going to do. But you seem excited about the possibility.” She offered a smile that didn’t quite make it to her eyes. This was familiar territory and a horrible sense of déjà vu arrived right on time in the center of my consciousness.
“I guess I’m just riding the high of the idea.”
She nodded but her demeanor was noticeably altered. “But you’re going to the meeting?”
I sighed. “I think I should at least hear what they have to say, don’t you?”
“Of course. You owe it to yourself and all that you’ve accomplished. You should definitely go.”
“We’d have to head back to the city within the hour. The meeting is tonight.”
“Um, do you mind if I stay back here the extra night? I could reimburse you for the room.”
I was a little hurt she didn’t want to ride back together, but even more taken aback by her offer of money. “If that’s what you want, you’re welcome to stay. But I don’t want your money.” She didn’t answer. She seemed lost in thought, and I was starting to feel as if things were crumbling around me. There was suddenly a distance between us and I
hated it. “Adrienne?”
Her answer was abrupt, almost as if she was cutting to the chase. “I need to say something here.”
“Okay.”
She scooted back on the rock so she could face me fully and took a breath. “If you think about it, Jenna, we’re not in an incredibly different set of circumstances now than we were four years ago. We’re both in the middle of fairly successful careers that will probably pull us in two different directions at one point or another, and from the look of things, it could be sooner than we realized. The only shot we have at making this work is to be completely honest this time around.” She took a deep breath and I could tell this wasn’t easy for her. “If it were up to me, you wouldn’t go. You’d stay in New York and do Elevation, which could be just as big a boost to your career if it’s received well. We could explore what it’s like to really be together and do this thing right. Plus, there’s the fact I don’t want to be apart from you. It’s selfish of me, I know, but it’s what I want, and I need for everything to be out on the table.”
I smiled. I liked hearing that she wanted me around. “So what you’re saying—”
She squeezed my hand. “Is that I want this to work. I mean what I said, but I’ll support you in whatever you decide. This is the kind of thing you live for, and I happen to love that you dream big. It would be incredibly hard, but I can make a few sacrifices if it means you’re happy. I’m not going anywhere.”
I opened my mouth to speak, but the first drops hit us. The rain was refreshing at first and we both looked skyward, smiling. But it wasn’t long until the sky opened up and large, wet drops began to pelt us mercilessly. We scrambled to gather our belongings and ran back to the car, soaked by the time we made it there. Adrienne grabbed for the door handle on the driver’s side, but before she could get it open, I stopped her, turned her around, and pressed her up against the car with a searing kiss. She gasped, caught off guard, but recovered quickly. She grasped the back of my neck as she pulled me in tighter. The rain poured down, drenching every inch of our bodies, but the kissing continued, unrelenting. Her mouth was slick from the rain and I could feel that my clothes were now glued to my body, but I didn’t care. We eventually came up for air, gradually more aware of the conditions around us and after one last nip, I ran around to the passenger’s side, both of us dashing into the dry car.
When we arrived back at the cottage, we only had a few minutes together before I was forced to pack up and head out if I wanted to make it back to the city in time.
Adrienne walked me to the door and handed me a thermos of coffee for the road. “Please drive safe. The rain may not let up and the roads will be wet.”
“Yes, ma’am. Are you sure you won’t come with me?”
She shook her head and damn it, there was that distant look again. “I think I need another night before returning to the real world.”
I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her closer. “I’m jealous. I want so badly to stay.”
She looked into my eyes, her gaze earnest and intense. “I hope you get what you want, Jenna, whatever that may be.”
There was a lump in my throat and I found it difficult to speak. Instead, I nodded, desperately wanting not to hurt her and at the same time not knowing how to make that fit into life as I knew it.
Chapter Thirteen
I’m pretty sure Satan had a hand in developing the kind of horrible traffic that struck just when you needed to be somewhere important. The two hours it should have taken me to make it to midtown by car had blossomed into close to three and a half. But for some reason, it didn’t bother me the way it should have. As I sat there, I reached into my bag and found an orange, tossing it ever so softly in the confined space of the car as I stared, blinked, and wondered. Starring in a film like this one would open up a myriad of opportunities in Hollywood. I could write my own ticket, search out my own projects, and pick and choose from a variety of prime gigs. That’s what all the hard work had been about. But if that was the case, why wasn’t I ecstatic, over the moon? Why didn’t I want to plow through all this traffic and get to the meeting that could change my life for the better?
I set the orange down as my thought process picked up speed. I began to list in my head the happiest moments in my life and began to zero in on a startling conclusion. Those moments weren’t centered around my achievements in the arts or any kind of awards or nominations I’d ever received. They weren’t about long hours spent on character development or getting the call that I’d landed a part I desperately wanted. The most precious moments of my life, the memories I tucked away and valued above all others, were of Adrienne. They were the times we spent after the show in her dressing room on tour, talking or not talking, our first date on the pier and the time when I saw her face so unexpectedly at the stage door. Then there was the weekend we’d just shared where I felt everything come together again in the most wonderful way. When I was with her, everything felt real and alive and bursting with color. When I was without her, I was always searching for something, anything, to make me feel the way she did. Hell, I already missed her so badly I could barely breathe.
On the verge of something big, I pulled the car out of traffic and onto the side of the road. And there it was. The truth was right there in front of me. Nothing else could make me feel the way she could. I was head over heels in love with her.
“I’m an idiot,” I said to the empty car. I lowered my head onto the steering wheel.
For so many years, I’d been sure of who I was and what I needed out of life to be happy. But here in the dark, the rain beating against the windshield, I couldn’t escape the fact that I loved Adrienne more than I’d ever loved anyone in my entire life. I wasn’t falling in love with her, I was there, and no matter how hard I’d fought against it, I probably had been for a very long time. In that instant, it felt like my heart locked into the place that it was always meant to be.
I acted fast, reaching for my wallet. “Damn it,” I muttered. I hated myself for being so completely disorganized. I dumped out the wallet’s contents unceremoniously onto the passenger’s seat and my eyes landed on what I sought. My thumb moved across the nondescript business card and I did a little happy dance in my head. I pulled the phone from my pocket and dialed the number on the card. “Hi, Ethan? It’s Jenna McGovern from yesterday. Listen, I’m sorry to bother you, but I was hoping you could help me out with something kind of last minute. I need a favor.”
*
It was well after one a.m. when I arrived back at the beach cottage. I’d had several stops to make along the way, one of which I was still feeling the effects of. I stared at the darkened porch and decided nervously it was now or never. I rubbed my hands together, knocked softly, and waited. No response. I stepped forward and knocked louder this time. It took a minute or two for Adrienne to come to the door.
She flipped the porch light on and squinted. “Hello?” She looked concerned, sleepy, and beautiful as ever. Definite butterfly action happening.
“It’s okay. It’s me.”
“Jenna? Is everything okay? What time is it?”
“It’s close to two a.m. and everything is fine. It’s more than fine. It’s wonderful.” I couldn’t contain my smile.
She tilted her head. “Is it the part? Was the offer better than you thought?”
“I’m in love with you.” I raised one shoulder and let it drop simply.
Adrienne looked back at me and swallowed. Well, that certainly shut her up. It seemed like an eternity before she spoke, but when she did her voice was meek and several shades of adorable. “You are?”
I nodded, my emotion so raw and unguarded in that moment that I prayed I’d find the words I needed. “I am. I think I’ve loved you from that first day we spent together on the pier and I haven’t stopped since. I was stupid to let so much time go by without saying so, but I know now that I don’t want to spend another day apart from you.” She took my hands, which were shaking noticeably, in hers. “I�
��ve made mistakes. I know that. But I swear to you, Adrienne, that I will love you for the rest of my life and nothing, not even my stupid ambition, will ever come before you do. I told Latham to forget it. I don’t want to go to Italy, not unless I’m following you there, which I would do. Please say that you forgive me, and that you’ll spend your life with me, and that you’ll teach our kids how to bowl and—”
I didn’t get a chance to finish because she kissed me and fresh tears streamed down my face.
“Yes,” she breathed in my ear. “I want that too. I love you, Jenna. Of course I love you.”
I laughed through my tears, holding her tightly, feeling her heart beat against mine and knowing this was it. This was where I belonged. That’s when I remembered.
“Wait. I have something for you.” I pulled the small box from my pocket and removed the silver locket inside. “I saw this in the first antique shop we stopped at. The inscription on the back says ‘To my love. Forever is ours.’ When I read those words, somewhere deep down, I knew they were about you. I was too timid to acknowledge it in the moment, but it was always there, Adrienne. This inscription says what’s in my heart. Please believe me when I tell you there is nothing I want more than to spend forever with you.”
Her hand shook slightly as she accepted the locket and ran her fingers across the raised anchor, studying the detail. “It’s stunning,” she said. She opened it and her movement stilled. Inside was a photo of us at the lighthouse, holding on to each other and smiling at the camera. “Jenna,” she whispered achingly, pulling the locket to her chest “Thank you.” She fastened the clasp behind her neck before leaning in closer so that our foreheads touched. “I don’t even know what to say. I’ll cherish it. And you. I promise.”
Adrienne took my hand in hers and I followed her into the cottage. Once inside, I sighed, feeling so wonderfully carefree. “You have no idea how nice it is to be back here. I feel like I want to scream from the rooftops or something.”
Waiting in the Wings Page 25
