by Lily Zante
Rona was tired. She’d done a long day just to catch up with the orders, and she’d wanted to prove that she could work as hard as Kim, if not harder.
Hours of packaging up orders and moving boxes around and then taking them to the post office had taken its toll. To recover she’d taken a good forty-minute break and had caught up with the latest episode of ‘The Young and the Restless.’
She hoped Carlos had fed and bathed Tori and that she would be ready for sleep by the time she got home. Was it too much to expect him to have cooked dinner? The only thing she wanted was to sprawl in front of the sofa and do nothing.
And dream about her next visit to Verona.
Did she dare to dream?
It wasn’t only that she was excited by the chance of seeing Ruben again, or spending her evenings at Gioberti’s—any excuse to go to Verona was good for her. A change of scenery would do her good.
But her elated mood sank to the floor, hitting it hard as soon as she walked through the door. Toys littered the floor and the sofas in the living room. Compared to this Ava’s apartment didn’t look so bad.
Her deflated spirits sank further the minute she entered the kitchen. Plates and glasses were scattered all across the countertops, which was the only reason the sink was empty.
He’d bought her favorite wine, too. The idiot. He obviously had high hopes for this evening.
Carlos was normally good—he was used to keeping the working areas clean and she wondered what had gone wrong. It had only been the two of them all day. How many people had he cooked for? And why so many pans when she suspected all he’d done was boil pasta and vegetables.
So much for coming home to rest.
She stared at the mess and her mouth drew into a straight line. Opening the door to their room, she found Carlos snoring loudly with Tori lying peacefully in his arms. Rona’s heart melted at the sight of her daughter looking sweet and peaceful in her lilac Dora pajamas.
All thoughts of flopping onto the sofa disappeared as fast as the smile on her face had, and she closed the door quietly and returned to the carnage in the rest of the house. She set to washing the dishes and clearing up the toys.
Ordinarily she wouldn’t have done this, but rage propelled her into action. She wasn’t house proud by any means, not like her crazy sister. Rona could happily live in a state of disarray for a few days, but she did, as a rule, keep the kitchen sink empty and the living room tidy at the end of the day.
Otherwise, it felt as though she never got to relax in a child-free zone.
She got busy tidying up the mess, and her temper calmed down a little due to her energy being used up.
By the time she put her feet up, she was drained completely like a used up battery. She poured herself a glass, got herself a straw, put her feet up and turned on the TV.
But she didn’t focus on a single program as she flicked back and forth looking for a nice, sentimental and romantic film to lose herself in.
Instead, she drank her wine and thought about Verona. She would be there soon. But as she settled down and flicked through the TV stations, she heard the door to their bedroom open and a few seconds later a groggy Carlos appeared in front of her.
“Hi, honey,” he said, pinching the corners of his eyes. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”
She glanced at him once before turning her attention the TV and continued to sip through her straw.
“I see you found the wine?” He gave her the kind of smile that had once captivated her heart. Only now it made her want to throw something at him. She lay sprawled out across the sofa taking up the seating space. Carlos had nowhere to sit—unless he sat on the other couch. Instead, he moved to the bottom end and sat on the few inches of cushion that was available to him by her feet.
She sensed his reticence, his sheepishness and caught him examining her face. “I thought we’d order takeout. You know, from the restaurant.” His voice was light and airy, full of apology and expectation.
“I’m not hungry.”
“How come?” he asked, squeezing her calf. “Did you already eat?”
“No, I’m just not hungry.” She sipped some more wine. It was good, and it flowed through her veins like liquid happiness.
He made a noise that sounded like disappointment turned loud. “I waited for you. I thought we might have gone out tonight, you know, because I messed up the last time. But I didn’t want to ask Elsa to babysit again.”
“Good thing you didn’t. Ava thinks we already overwork her.”
“No?” he asked, in surprise. “Did she actually say that?”
“She sorta implied it, in a roundabout way.” She couldn’t work out why Carlos grated on her and even though he was trying to get on her good side by giving her calves an unasked-for massage, she wanted him to go away.
A wall of animosity had come between them—for her at least. It hadn’t suddenly appeared either. This had been a few months in the making. Possibly even since Tori had been born. Their relationship had become strained and she wasn’t sure what it was. Could sleep deprivation be that big a factor in divorce?
He asked her something, but she was pretending so hard to be dismissive and aloof—something that had become her new normal—that she really had switched off. She’d barely looked at him, either.
“Hmmm?” she said, sipping on her straw.
“Rona?” he said sharply.
“What?” She finally and begrudgingly directed her gaze at him. He looked as miserable as hell.
“Just put that down would you?” He sat forward on the couch, restless. The sombre tone of his voice immediately grabbed her attention and she pulled the straw out of her mouth. The air crackled with tension. Not now, please. She didn’t want another row—not now when she had some news for him. She wondered when to break it to him.
“Do you think we could ever have a proper conversation? Why is this so hard?”
“Why is what hard, Carlos?”
“Why are we always fighting? Why are you always so pissed off when you see me?”
“I just got home about half an hour ago. I had to clean up the kitchen and the living room. And now I’m unwinding in front of the TV. You don’t have to do any of that when you get in from work. It’s one or two days a week. I thought you’d be able to manage, because I do. And when you don’t, of course I’m going to get angry.”
“You’re always angry. It’s not just one or two days a week.”
“You misunderstood what I’m trying to tell you.” But she was too fed up to try to get her point across and she wasn’t in the mood to perform an autopsy on the relationship right now.
“I’m sorry I fell asleep. I was putting Tori to bed, she’s fed and bathed by the way—” he paused, as if waiting for effect.
When she barely acknowledged his feats of accomplishment, he continued. “I thought it would be nice for us to spend the evening together. Eating together and talking—the way we used to. You worked a long day today,” he said and reached out to lay his hand on her calf. “We don’t get to spend as much time together.”
“You’re always working. I’m used to it and maybe you should be too.” She wondered if now was the time to slip in the news about her return to Verona.
He blinked. “You’re talking as if you don’t care anymore.”
“Rona?” he asked when she said nothing.
“What?”
“We still have to make time for one another.”
“Yeah?” she said sarcastically. She’d often tried to.
“If you’re still mad at me. If this is your way of getting back at me—”
“For what?”
“This,” he said, throwing his hands up in the air and surveying the room. “That’s what you want to show me, isn’t it. That you had to come home and clear up. I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry.”
“I have something to tell you.” She put her wine glass down and sat up.
He watched her carefully, his eyebrows drawing close
r together as though he had an idea it might not be news he liked.
“I’ve been asked to go to Verona a few weeks earlier.”
“Why?” His forehead creased. “The wedding’s not until August.”
“It’s not for the wedding. Well,” she looked away and scrunched her hair into a small bun at the back. “I suppose I could help with the wedding once I’m there but—”
“But why earlier?” She could instantly see that he didn’t like this one bit.
“Ava asked me. She wants my help. She’s finding it hard what with the wedding and being pregnant.”
“How can you help?” Carlos looked puzzled and decidedly unhappy.
“She wants me to update the website and get involved in the inventory and stuff like that.”
“Stuff like that? Don’t you think you should find out precisely what is expected of you?” He was asking more questions than she’d asked Ava. She’d immediately signed up for it, none the wiser as to what exactly was required of her. But she was fairly confident she could handle whatever Ava threw at her. After all, how hard could it be?
Rona shrugged. “Ava wouldn’t ask me unless she thought I could handle it.” She wrinkled her nose.
“How long for?”
“Obviously until the wedding at least.”
Carlos stood up and placed his hands in his pockets. “You and Tori will be gone for almost two months?”
She smiled, but not too widely when she saw his scowl. “It’s to help Ava. I told you the pressure is beginning to get to her. Apparently she says Nico is getting stressed out with the new hotel too. They have a lot going on.”
Carlos appeared somewhat appeased when she put it like that. She’d forgotten his unswerving fondness for Ava. That girl couldn’t do a thing wrong.
“I guess if she really needs you,” he said, resting his hand on the back of his neck. He voice trailed off.
“It’s not like she needs my help with the baby or anything. Nico provides for her well enough. She doesn’t even have to work.”
“You don’t have to work,” he countered. “I provide well enough for all of us.”
“You’re hardly in the same league, Carlos.” She was careless with her words tonight and instantly regretted what she’d said.
He was silent for the longest time and she dared not say another word.
“When are you leaving?”
“I’m not sure. A week or so. She said I needed to discuss it with you.”
He smiled. “Ava would,” he said softly. They had a good relationship the two of them and it sometimes annoyed her no end. “But you’ve already made up your mind, haven’t you?”
She shrugged. He knew her well enough.
He surprised her when he crouched on the floor and looked directly into her eyes. “I know you’ve been unhappy lately. Things between us aren’t like they used to be.”
She remained silent.
“I don’t know what the problem is.” He confessed.
And that was the problem—the disconnect between them. “I don’t know how to fix it, Rona.” He looked uncomfortable. “Maybe with Ava having a baby, maybe if you want to have another one too, we could try …”
Oh. God. No.
“No,” she said quickly, shaking her head.
“Would it really be so bad?” Disappointment painted his face.
She shrank at his words. “Most definitely not. Carlos. I don’t want another baby.”
“Not yet?” He suggested.
“Not ever.”
He got up then and backed away, the hurt in his eyes making her feel as if she’d fatally shot him with her words. “You’re that certain?”
She hadn’t meant it that harshly. “I mean, no for now.”
“No,” he said, hanging his head. “You really seemed sure. I didn’t know that having my babies was going to be such a chore for you.” He walked away and she realized how badly she’d wounded him.
She’d hurt him. It had been careless and rash of her but she couldn’t take it back and she knew Carlos well enough now to know that he wouldn’t melt until the following day.
Chapter 11
Almost ten days later, she left Denver and returned to Italy. Elsa had been pleased, Carlos quieter than usual. Her friends had squealed with delight and Celine had asked her to be on the lookout for an eligible and preferably rich Italian for her. Age not relevant.
Kim had sent her an email wishing her a pleasant stay abroad. Rona had replied by telling her that she hoped she would be able to manage by herself and to email her if she had any problems or questions.
Carlos had begrudgingly accepted that she and Tori would be away from him for almost six weeks. She knew he wasn’t happy but seemed to quietly give in on the grounds that Ava needed her help.
Life was sweet. She was back in Verona and her heart surged with joy. She felt weightless—as though heat radiated through her, as though she had a spring in her step, as though she couldn’t stop grinning from ear to ear.
This is the way life was meant to be lived. Rona could barely stop herself from smiling.
She was back at the Villa Sagranosa—the beautiful pensione set in a large estate bordered by vineyards. It was quiet, but she felt safe here. Safe and at peace.
She’d arrived at the start of July; gorgeous, beautiful, sun-drenched July in Italy. The nerve endings in her body had tingled the moment she had set eyes on the familiar green surroundings. Just the scenery alone had done it for her. She didn’t need anything else and the possibility of running into Ruben hadn’t crossed her mind. Much.
She wouldn’t be able to go out as freely; not like before, unless she took Tori with her. At least there would be no Elsa staring at her with blatant disapproval across her face each time Rona slipped out in the evening.
She had no idea how she was expected to help Ava with a youngster in tow. It remained to be seen what Ava had in mind because her sister had mentioned that she was working on a solution.
Tori gurgled happily on the bed. They’d arrived yesterday and Nico and Ava had both arrived at the airport to pick them up before driving them to the pensione.
They’d thoughtfully stocked the fridge and the cupboards wisely knowing that Rona would be too tired with a ten-month old baby to want to do anything other than rest.
How right they’d been too.
“Ga-ga-ga,” gurgled Tori happily and clapped her hands in delight as Rona slipped a pair of cute red shorts on her.
“Mama working with Aunty Ava. Is Tori going to be a good girl?” Rona cooed, as she slipped first one foot and then the other through the shorts.
“Da-da-da-da,” said Tori. “Dada…”
Rona’s heart sank. “Da-da misses Tori. Tori loves dada?”
Her little girl clapped ecstatically.
“Da-da coming soon.” Rona smiled at her daughter and saw Carlos’s soft brown eyes staring back at her. Tori was a real mix of the two of them but looking at her in this moment reminded Rona of Carlos. She’d called to tell him they had arrived, but he seemed a little reserved. His unhappiness at their departure was evident.
“Da-da-da-da,” trilled Tori.
“Come on,” said Rona, lifting her up and putting her into the stroller. “Let’s go to work.”
“Good morning!” Ava cried excitedly as soon as Rona walked through the doors and into the hotel lobby. She hoped the wheels wouldn’t mess up the marble floor and was grateful to have made it inside. Pushing the stroller up the steps and through the double doors wasn’t easy, and she bet her bottom dollar that Nico would install a ramp once Ava had the baby and they realized how difficult it was.
Tori’s chubby little face spread into the widest smile, baring two brand new bottom teeth.
“How’s my favorite niece?” Ava freed her from the stroller and hugged the baby close to her.
“Did you sleep well?” Ava asked her over the baby’s head.
“Better than Tori,” Rona replied, and exchanged greetin
gs with Gina, the friendly receptionist who always seemed to be on duty.
“Nice to see you again, Rona.”
“It’s great to be back again,” confessed Rona happily. “And congratulations on the promotion.” Ava had told her that Gina was now the manager of the hotel.
“Thank you,” replied Gina, blushing.
“Come on,” said Ava, and took her into her office. “This used to be Nico’s once,” she explained.
“Where’s he gone?”
“Into Edmondo’s office.”
“Come in,” said Ava a little breathlessly. “There’s someone I want you to meet.”
Rona stepped in and saw a young girl, probably no more than in her early twenties.
“This is Lizzi and she sometimes helps us with childcare duties here at the hotel. She’s happy to look after Tori while you and I work.”
Rona glanced at the smiling young woman before her who appeared to be looking at Tori with delight. She felt slightly unsure but knew her sister wouldn’t have hired someone she didn’t trust.
“Hello, you pretty little baby,” said Lizzi, in a cheery, sing-song voice.
Tori immediately smiled and then held her arms out.
“Only if you’re sure,” said Ava. “I trust her implicitly but the decision is yours.”
Rona looked at them both. “Where will they be?”
“Always around the hotel. They have the gardens and the conservatory when it’s quiet, and one of the toilets is set up for baby changing facilities. I suppose at some stage we need to have some sort of children’s play area. But we don’t have that yet.”
It was more than the playpen, thought Rona. A slow smile spread across her face. This was more than enough and she always had Tori close by. She’d been worried about the childcare aspect of things, and any hesitance she experienced at handing her daughter over to a stranger fell away as soon as she saw the way Lizzi and Tori seemed to be getting on. It gave her a good feeling.
“Okay,” agreed Rona. “Let’s give it a try.”
And that was how it had started.
They spoke about Elsa, Nico, Edmondo’s passing and Carlos and how their lives had suddenly changed in such a short span of time and then they spent the morning getting to work.
