by A. M. Myers
Oh, hell.
What am I doing?
I haven’t agreed to his request for a date and even if I had, this is not one. He’s just taking me to buy a damn car. I quickly change into a pair of jean shorts, a tank top, and a pair of flip-flops before ducking back into the bathroom. My hand shakes as I hold the lip-gloss wand in front of my face and I close my eyes as I suck in a breath.
“Baby steps,” I whisper, reminding myself of my talk with Dr. Jeffers yesterday. Opening my eyes, I stare at my reflection in the mirror. My cheeks are pink and my eyes are alive in a way they haven’t been in a really long time. If I close my eyes again, I can still remember the vacant look I’ve seen staring back at me for the last two years and I’m trying so hard to not get my hopes up but maybe I’m finally moving forward. Maybe the worst is really behind me. My lips stretch into a smile and I drop my gaze from the mirror as I shake my head. Who would have thought that getting hit by a truck would be just what I needed?
The doorbell rings, pulling my gaze to my bedroom door. “Shit.”
I drop my lip-gloss into my purse and rush back downstairs before yanking the door open as I pant. Lucas’s eyebrows shoot up and I bend over and brace my hands on my knees.
“You all right?”
I nod, sucking in air. “Yeah. I was just upstairs when the doorbell rang and apparently, getting in a car accident really takes it out of you.”
“You sure we should be doing this today?” he asks as I straighten and I nod.
“Yeah. I saw the doctor this morning and he cleared me.”
He watches me skeptically so I plaster a smile on my face and hope I don’t look like a crazy person.
“If you’re sure…”
I nod. “I am.”
“Let’s go buy a car, then,” he answers with a smile as he holds his hand out to me. I hesitate for a second before grabbing it and letting him lace our fingers together. My heart races and I fight back a smile as we walk to his truck. It’s been so damn long since someone’s held my hand and maybe I’m not remembering things clearly but I swear, it never felt this good. There is something about Lucas that settles me and makes me feel safe - I first noticed it at the accident and at the time, I assumed it was the situation. Now, though, I know it’s just him. No one else could have kept me calm the way he did.
“So,” he says, drawing my gaze over to him as he climbs behind the wheel of the truck. “Do you know what you’re looking for?”
I shake my head. “No idea. I liked my Maxima but I think I’m kind of wanting something new.”
“Sounds good. I know a guy who brings a lot of work into the bike shop so I thought I’d take you over to his place. He’ll take good care of you.”
“Okay.”
As we pull out of the driveway, he glances over at me. “Where’s Brooklyn today?”
“With Alice. She took her to the park and I was going over work stuff for Monday when I realized that I’d need a new car.”
He nods, turning back to the road. “If I had thought of it, I would have brought one over that you could borrow.”
“Oh, no, it’s really okay. It’s something I need to take care of so I might as well do it today.”
My phone buzzes with a text.
Willa:
Staff meeting Monday morning.
Don’t forget.
“Oh, Lord,” I mutter, rolling my eyes with a smile on my face. Like I could ever forget Willa’s weekly staff meetings.
“Everything okay?”
I glance over at Lucas and nod. “Yeah. It’s just my assistant, Willa, reminding me of our staff meeting on Monday.”
“You have staff?” he asks, brows raised, and I laugh.
“Besides Willa and I… no. Hence, why it’s so ridiculous but it helps her feel more organized so I roll with it.”
He stares at me for a second before turning back to the road with a scowl. “How old are you?”
“Twenty-eight. Why?”
“I don’t know. You just seem to have everything together and I still feel like I’m tripping through life.”
Laughter bubbles out of me as I shake my head. “Oh, no. Trust me, I’m just as big of a mess as anyone else.”
“Yeah, but you’ve got your own business, a great house, and a gorgeous kid. Looks like you’re killing it from where I’m standing.”
“Well, thank you,” I reply, a blush rising to my cheeks. “But the business and the house were actually my grandmother’s and she left them to me when she died a couple years ago.”
“Oh, I’m sorry.”
I shake my head, fighting back a few tears. “No, it’s okay. She was an incredible woman and lived an amazing life, which is what I like to focus on, no matter how much I miss her.”
“I know you said Alice is all you have left but what happened to your parents?”
Sucking in a breath, I twist my fingers together in my lap. “Wow. Going straight for the heavy stuff, huh?”
“Sorry. I’m just curious about you. You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,” he assures me but the sincerity and kindness on his face urges me to continue. Reaching across the cab, I grab his hand.
“When I was eight, they dropped Alice and I off at Gram’s house to have their weekly date night. Mom always wanted this special candy they didn’t have at the theater so they stopped off at a gas station to pick some up and a man walked in with a gun. After he robbed the place, he shot the clerk and both of my parents.”
“Jesus Christ,” he breathes, giving my hand a squeeze as we pull into the dealership parking lot and he parks the car. “I’m so sorry, Quinn.”
I shake my head. “You have nothing to be sorry for. It was hard and still is sometimes but Gram was there for us. She took us in after they died and she raised us all by herself.”
“She sounds like an incredible woman.”
Our eyes meet and I smile. “She was.”
Time seems to stand still as the air around us grows heavy and he leans in, his gaze dropping to my lips. My body moves without any instruction from me, leaning into him as my skin prickles with anticipation and my heart pounds in my chest. Oh, god, what if I’m not ready for this? I want it so badly but there’s a very real chance that the moment his lips touch mine, I’ll lose it. My hand shakes and he gives it a squeeze, a soft smile stretching across his face and just when I think he’s going to close the distance between us, a bang echoes through the cab and we both jump back.
“Luke, my boy! What are you doing here?”
“Hey, Calvin,” he says, glancing out of the truck window as the round middle-aged man approaches the window. “I was hoping you’d help my girl find a new car.”
My cheeks heat as he turns back to me and flashes me a grin that could melt butter.
“Absolutely,” Calvin calls, excitement in his voice. “Nice to meet you, Darlin’. I’m Calvin.”
“Hi, I’m Quinn,” I call back with a wave. Calvin smacks Lucas’s arm and lets out a whistle.
“She’s fucking gorgeous.”
“Watch it,” Lucas growls. Calvin takes a step back with raised brows as I turn to look at Lucas. Maybe the edge to his voice should scare me but fear is the farthest thing from what I’m feeling. With him, from the very first moment we met, I’ve always felt safe and having him defend my honor, so to speak, stirs up feelings in me that I haven’t felt in a long time. Feelings that will have me agreeing to his date and anything else he asks of me if I’m not careful.
“Well, should we find you a car, then?” Calvin asks, pulling me out of my thoughts and I smile as Lucas glances over at me, searching for approval with his blue gaze. I nod.
“Yeah, let’s do this.”
Lucas instructs me to wait for him before jumping down from the truck and rounding the front. When he opens my door, he holds his hand out and I grab him as he guides me safely to the ground. We meet Calvin around the front of the truck and Lucas wraps his arm around my shoulders. I can’t help but feel lik
e he’s sending a clear sign to Calvin for his earlier comment but I kind of like it.
“Do you have a car in mind, Ma’am?”
I bite my lips to keep from laughing at his formal tone as I shake my head. “No, I’m not really sure what I want.”
“Maybe you could just let us walk around for a bit,” Lucas suggests, his tone indicating that it’s really not a suggestion and Calvin nods.
“You got it. I’ll be in the office so holler if you need me.”
He practically scurries off and I turn to look at Lucas, barely holding back my grin.
“I think he’s scared of you now.”
He laughs and his whole face lights up, bringing back the carefree man I’ve been getting to know over the past few days. “Naw, I was just reminding him of his manners.”
“Mmhmm,” I murmur, glancing out across the lot as I cross my arms over my chest. “I’m pretty sure his shorts were wet.”
He laughs again and it warms my entire body. “He is right about one thing, though.”
“Yeah? What’s that?”
“You’re gorgeous,” he whispers, taking a step toward me. I back up until my shoulders touch the truck but he keeps advancing until he’s mere inches away from me.
Men have called me beautiful or gorgeous my entire life but somehow, when Lucas says it, it feels different - like he’s looking at me as a person instead of just long blonde hair, blue eyes, and a decent figure. With him, it feels like he sees the real me when every other man I’ve ever met was only interested in having me as a trophy on his arm but I’m still so scared to take this leap.
“Lucas, I…”
“I keep trying to remind myself not to rush this because I think from the moment you looked my way amidst the chaos of that car accident, I knew you were special but that’s so damn hard when all I want to do is kiss you every time you’re near me.”
“Oh, god,” I breathe out, trying to focus on anything other than the thought of him leaning in right now and planting his lips on mine.
“Tell me you feel the same way,” he urges, his breath fanning out across my face. “Tell me that I’m not losing my mind.”
“It’s complicated.”
He shakes his head. “No, it isn’t. This is the easy part so tell me, does your heart race just like mine every time we’re in the same room?”
“Yes, but…”
My words are cut off by his lips pressing against my forehead and I close my eyes, just soaking it all in as my body trembles. When he pulls away, our gazes connect and he smiles.
“That’s all I needed to know. Now, why don’t we go find you a car?”
* * * *
“Congrats, Darlin’!” Calvin exclaims as I sign the paperwork for my new Toyota Camry. When I’m finished, I drop the pen on the desk and smile up at him.
“Thank you for all your help.” We shake hands and he hands me the keys.
“You’re mighty welcome. Make sure you bring her by for the first oil change in five months. I had one of the boys put a little sticker on the windshield to remind ya.”
My smile is a little forced as I nod. Calvin seems like a nice enough man but I get the sense that he thinks I’m an airhead because of what’s between my thighs and my patience is wearing thin.
“Thank you.”
“Thanks, Calvin,” Lucas adds, his arm securely around my waist as he leans forward to shake Calvin’s hand. We all say good-bye before Lucas leads me outside where my new car waits for me and he holds his hand out.
“Let me get those keys, babe.”
I arch a brow. “Why?”
“Because I’m gonna have one of the prospects swing by and drive the car to your house.”
“I’m a big girl, Lucas. I can drive home,” I protest, pulling away from him. He nods, grabbing my hand and pulling me close again.
“I know you can but I want to take you home myself.”
“Oh,” I mutter, studying him for a moment before I hand the keys over. He grins and leans in to kiss my forehead again. Since we started our shopping trip three hours ago, he’s gotten more and more bold - grabbing my hand out of the blue and kissing my forehead anytime he pulls me close. I still have no idea what we’re doing or if I’ll even agree to a date but I can’t deny that I’m quickly becoming addicted to the feel of his arms around me. He makes me feel like the girl I was before everything went to hell and that’s a powerful drug.
Grabbing my hand again, he leads me over to his truck and opens the door for me before helping me up. Once I’m seated, he closes the door and rounds the front of the truck, texting someone and when he climbs behind the wheel, he glances across the truck at me.
“Someone is on their way to retrieve your new car.”
“Thank you.”
Turning back to the steering wheel, he starts the truck and leans over to turn the radio to the country station as I bite back a smile.
“So,” I start as we pull out of the parking lot. “Do I get to hear about your family now?”
He steals a glance in my direction before shaking his head as he blows out a breath. “That’s a heavy conversation that should probably be saved for later.”
“Oh.”
“I’m sorry… it’s just…”
“Dark and complicated?” I supply, remembering our conversation from last night.
He nods. “Yeah.”
Nothing I know about him would suggest that he is playing games with me but his unwillingness to tell me anything about his past doesn’t sit well with me. But then again, how well do I really know him? It has only been four days since the accident. God, I’m officially losing my mind.
We spend the rest of the ride home in silence and by the time he pulls into the driveway, I’m practically scrambling out of the truck to escape the tension. He meets me around the front and wisely doesn’t reach for my hand as we walk up to the front porch. At the door, I turn to him.
“Well, thank you for your help today.”
He runs his fingers through his dirty blond hair and sighs. “Listen, I know things got weird back there but I’m really hoping that you’ll still agree to that date we talked about.”
“I don’t…”
My words are cut off by the front door opening and Alice sticks her head out and grins at me. “Quinn, can I talk to you for a second?”
“Uh… Can it wait?”
She shakes her head and I peek over at Lucas before nodding.
“Just give me a second, okay?”
He nods and I duck inside with Alice. As soon as the door closes, my gaze roams over the hallway, searching for Brooklyn.
“Where’s Brooke?”
“Sleeping.”
I turn back to her and scowl. “So why did you call me in here?”
“Because you’re about to turn down a date with that ridiculously hot man out there.”
Sighing, I lean back against the door. “It’s complicated, Alice.”
“Because of…”
I cut her off by pressing my hand to her mouth, aware that she was able to hear my conversation with Lucas through the door.
“No,” I whisper.
“Do you like him?”
I nod. “Yes.”
“Okay, so then give this thing a shot.”
Dr. Jeffers’ comment from my session two days ago pops into my mind and I suck in a breath, peeking over my shoulder at the closed door as my heart races. Shit. Am I really going to do this?
“C’mon, Quinn. I have a good feeling about this guy.”
Sighing, I meet her gaze and nod. “Okay. I’ll agree to one date but that’s it.”
“Yes!” she squeals, jumping up and down excitedly. Shaking my head, I leave her to her victory party in the foyer as I step out onto the porch again. Lucas smiles as I meet his gaze.
“Okay,” I say with a nod and his grin grows.
“Yeah?”
I nod again. “One date - that’s all I’m agreeing to.”
“That will do
for now,” he answers, pulling me into his arms and pressing his lips against my forehead. I say a little prayer to whoever is up there watching over me that he doesn’t destroy me as I melt into him, already in way too deep.
Chapter Seven
Quinn
Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck.
What the hell am I doing?
I’m not ready for this.
“Alice!” I scream, blinking away tears as I flatten my shaking hands against the white lace of my dress. It is a little sexy, ending mid-thigh but with my cowboy boots, it doesn’t look quite so risqué and I’ve spent the last hour and a half curling my hair and doing my makeup but I don’t think I can do this. Alice runs into the room with Brooklyn on her hip.
“What’s wrong?”
I turn to look at her and she sighs before closing the bedroom door and setting Brooklyn down on the floor.
“I have to call and cancel.”
She shakes her head, a determined look on her face. “There’s no way in hell I’m letting you do that. You can do this, Sis.”
“I can’t,” I whisper, my hands shaking even harder. I don’t know what the hell I was thinking when I agreed to this date last night but I can’t actually go through with it. She plops down on the bed.
“Why not?”
I turn back to the mirror and inspect myself again. “I’m not ready.”
“That’s just fear, Quinn. It doesn’t mean that you’re not ready and if you cling to that excuse, you’ll never find love. Next.”
“It’s not good for Brooklyn for me to be going out…”
“Yeah, I’m calling bullshit right now,” she interrupts me, holding her hand up. “Brooklyn is a baby and will never remember this one date, if that’s all it is but if it’s more, I’m damn sure that having more people to love her will never be a bad thing. Next.”
I suck in a breath. “He won’t tell me anything about his past…”
“That’s the point of the date, big sister. You guys go out and eat or see a movie and you get to know each other. Besides, I highly doubt you’ve spilled everything about yourself.”
