“I must have been mistaken,” I said, feeling sick to my stomach. “I’m sorry.”
Payne watched me intensely. His gaze made me feel very exposed. “You’re that new girl,” Payne said slowly. “Bristol.”
“Yeah.”
“Bristol Blackburn?”
Suddenly everything Maggie had told me about the family feud between the McKnights and Blackburns came flooding back.
“Yeah, Bristol Blackburn,” I said. “And you’re Payne McKnight.”
Payne nodded. “I heard about your parents. I’m sorry for your loss.”
“Thank you,” I replied.
Payne walked over to where his bike lay and gave it a sour look. After a moment of reflection, he turned toward me again. “I think I may know the boy you saw,” Payne said.
“Oh,” I said, keeping my voice casual. “I thought we decided I must have imagined him.”
“Did we?” Payne asked. “I’m not so sure. The boy I’m thinking of…I’ve seen him down here a few times. Not for some time, but I’d see him here with his dog. Name’s Jared.”
“Jared?” I repeated. “His name or the dogs?”
“His name,” Payne answered. “Dog is Eli. You know what else?”
I shrugged.
“Kid I’m talking about disappeared nearly four years ago. I think he’s dead.”
I said nothing. I just watched Payne watch me. Felt his gaze on my face. Should I be acting surprised? Shocked? Amused? Whatever I should have acted like, it was too late. Payne was seeing right through me.
“Look, I should get back home.”
“He was my cousin,” Payne stated. He measured my reaction, and I was sure he could see my heart breaking for him in my eyes.
“I’m sorry,” I offered. “I really have to go.” I turned and started to walk away.
“Bristol,” Payne said. My heart nearly melted hearing him say my name. “Please.”
I stopped and turned.
“My Aunt Breanne,” Payne said. “When Jared went missing, I thought she was going to lose it. It’s her little boy, and she has no idea what happened to him. She needs closure. She needs to know.”
I felt the emotion rolling off him. The anguish, the sense of responsibility he was experiencing, was so enormous I was afraid it might crush him.
“I can’t imagine what that must be like,” I answered. “But if that’s true, then it can’t have been him that I saw.” I watched him as I said it. Only I wasn’t any good at reading the living. “I mean, that makes no sense, right?”
I waited for his answer. He came even closer to me. Close enough for anything to happen. I felt myself tremble as he looked down at me.
“Maybe,” Payne said, “maybe not. In this town, things don’t always make sense. But I think you did see him.”
I swallowed hard. Payne was inches away from guessing my secret. Not to mention that the two of us were out here alone, and no one knew where we were. There was nothing to stop him from fulfilling my premonition of him killing me. Yet, the only thing that kept popping into my mind was the thought of him kissing me.
I can be such a girl at times.
“I really should go,” I said.
“Bristol,” Payne said. “On Monday, when you see me, you can say hello. I won’t kill you, I promise.”
I stopped dead in my tracks for a moment, his words ringing in my ears. I’m sure he believed his comment was the sole reason for my pause, but really, it wasn’t.
Standing before me was the boy in the Giants shirt. He looked up at me, gave me a sad, lonely smile, and then he and his pup faded away.
I continued to walk away from Payne McKnight, stopping myself from looking back. After all, I didn’t want him to see the tears in my eyes.
Chapter Five
Finding Jared
It was one of those moments where you know you’re asleep and inside of a dream, but you still have no control over it. For me, when I’m in that moment, I try to let go. If I take control of the dream, I can’t trust whatever the dream might want to show me. So, I give myself over to the vision and just try to pay attention. Details can be very important.
I was back by the stream, walking along quietly. It was dark out, but the moonlight gave off enough illumination for me to navigate my way. The air was filled with the trickling of the water and the chirps of crickets.
It was the stench that first got my attention. Rotting flesh. It was so intense I could taste the putrefied odor. Then my eyes were drawn to the water. It was filled with blood.
I followed the bloody stream, ignoring the growing number of flies buzzing by my ears and rats scurrying by my feet, until I reached the same spot where Payne had come crashing down.
I stood in the brush and waited.
I sensed movement in the shadows. I tried to make out the figure. There was nobody there, but still the shadow moved.
Then other shadows crept along the ground. As they crept forward, the grass on the ground below withered and died. A bone chilling breeze cut through me as the shadows gathered in the center of the clearing.
“Ssssshe is more dangerous than we thought,” a voice like fingernails on a chalkboard spoke.
“Yesssss, she must be ssstopped,” said a second disembodied voice.
“McKnight,” spoke a third, this one the cruelest sounding of them all, “he is the key.”
“Will he?” asked the first.
“He must,” answered the third. “He will obey or be consumed.”
“McKnight is amused by her,” the second voice offered.
“No matter,” the third affirmed. “He mussssst obey!’
“What of the other?” asked the second. “He will protect her.”
There was a rumble of thunder. It was the third’s laughter. “He’s a child. He cannot defend her. He will perish if he daresssss.”
“Will he?” asked the first.
“Can he?” asked the second.
“Death would become him,” the third answered.
The thunder returned and lightning lit up the sky as blood-soaked rain started to fall from above.
I woke up covered in sweat and ready to vomit. I didn’t know what I’d just seen, but one thing was sure: it was not good.
* * * *
What were the chances I could get through Monday without seeing Payne McKnight? I needed a plan. Maybe I could just wave to him and then run the other way? Or maybe I could act like a bubble head until he decided he shouldn’t even bother with me. Or maybe…
Never mind. I would have to deal with him sooner or later.
“Bristol,” Maggie said, “what’s up with you? You seem a million miles away.”
We stopped in a corner of the hallway to talk as other students passed us by.
“Sorry,” I mumbled. “I’ve just got stuff on my mind.”
“Yeah, I can tell,” Maggie answered. “Like what? Or who?”
I stared at her. “What do you mean, who?”
She wiggled her eyebrows. God, I wanted to hit her. “Payne McKnight,” Maggie said cheerfully.
“What about him?” I snapped. “I know he’s good looking. Okay, maybe hot is a better word. Or scrumptious. All right, so he’s the most drop dead gorgeous guy in our school, possibly in North America. And maybe I did run into him this weekend, but I am not obsessed with him. Okay? Maggie, are you listening to me?”
But Maggie wasn’t looking at me. Rather, she was looking right past me, over my shoulder.
Crap!
I closed my eyes and slowly turned around, knowing full well what I would see when I opened my eyes. Maggie hadn’t just been saying his name. She was saying hi with his name.
I opened my eyes and there he was. Six feet of the most incredibly beautiful man I’ve ever seen in my life. He wore snug looking jeans and a blue shirt that really brought out his eyes. And, of course, he was grinning.
Double crap!
“Good morning, Bristol,” Payne said. “How are you?”
/> Heat flushed my face so bad I’m surprised I didn’t set off the fire sprinklers. “Dandy. You?”
He smiled and my heart leapt. What is wrong with me? There was a very distinct possibility this guy was going to murder me, and I was fawning over him? I really needed help.
“Maggie, right?” Payne said as he looked over my shoulder to my ex-friend.
“Yup, that’s me.” Maggie giggled. “Nice to meet you.”
“Yeah, you too,” Payne said. “Listen, I hate to be rude, but can I speak to Bristol alone for a bit? It’s really important.”
I turned to face Maggie. I didn’t dare say anything aloud again, but I willed her to understand me. I even started to mouth Don’t go to her. I was afraid she wouldn’t understand, until she gave me a smile and a nod.
“Sure,” Maggie said. “See you in class Bristol.” She wiggled her fingers as she walked away, doing that eyebrow thing again.
Sigh. I was really starting to like Maggie. Now I’d have to kill her.
I took a moment, a really long moment, to collect myself before turning to face Payne. When I did, I immediately saw the amusement in his eyes was replaced by a deep sadness. He pulled me into an empty classroom and closed the door.
“I need you to look at something,” he said as he reached into his book bag and pulled out what looked like a picture. “Please.”
He presented the picture to me. I kept my eyes trained on him as I took it. I knew what the picture would have on it. If I looked, lying would be pointless. Payne had already proved he could read me, and I couldn’t lie about this.
“Please,” he said. I heard the despair in his voice.
God, I was such a sucker.
I looked down at the picture. Staring up at me was the image of a young boy in a Giants cap, holding a small black dog.
Payne was watching me, just like I knew he would. I couldn’t bring myself to lie, but I cringed at the thought of admitting to the freak that I was.
Payne, however, didn’t wait for me to utter any words. He saw the truth in my eyes and closed his in response.
“Damn.” He took the picture back and walked to the window. “There was a part of me that was holding out hope.”
“I’m sorry.” I slowly walked over to him.
He nodded. “I know that was difficult. Thank you.” Then he leaned down and gently kissed my forehead.
In that instant of contact, I flashed to a future moment of intimacy shared between Payne and myself. A moment when the kiss was not so gentle, but hungry, and his touch was not filled with sadness, but need.
My knees felt like they were going to buckle.
I looked up at his kind, perfect face. I could not, at this moment, believe Payne would hurt me. I may not have said anything to confirm it, but Payne knew. He knew I had seen the ghost of his cousin. And Payne was being tender and sweet. He wasn’t looking at me like I was a freak.
“So what now?” I asked.
Payne thought a moment. “I’m not sure. I can’t let my aunt go on not knowing. It’ll hurt her to find out, but she needs the truth. I need to…” Payne closed his eyes. “I need to find his body and put him to rest.”
“Maybe I can help,” I said. I wanted to pull the words back the moment I uttered them because there was only one thing I could do to help, and it wasn’t something I wanted to do. Especially not in front of Payne. The mere thought of it made me queasy.
“How?” Payne asked.
I had never spoken about this type of thing with another living being except Ricky, who never judged.
“Sometimes, when I see the dead,” I started, watching Payne to gauge his reaction, “they talk to me. Maybe if I find him again, Jared can tell us.”
Payne moved closer. “Can it be that simple?”
I shrugged. “Maybe. Maybe not. Sometimes they can’t remember what happened themselves, but we can try.”
“Where? Back at the stream?”
“Makes sense,” I said. “He must like that place. Probably played there with his dog.”
“Yeah, he did,” Payne said. Then the first bell rang, and we both realized we were late. “We better run. Meet you there after school?”
I nodded. “See you then.”
Payne smiled. “It’s a date.”
“No, it’s not,” I said. I could feel my heartbeat quicken in both excitement and fear. “I don’t date.”
Payne didn’t say anything. He just shot me that grin that melted my heart.
* * * *
Talk about having a day drag on and on. How was I supposed to pay attention to my math teacher talk about X equaling pi once you subtract the variable and multiply by the integer or something like that, while I knew that later I would go with Payne McKnight, alone, into the woods? I’d never used my abilities in front of anyone before. I’d never even admitted to anyone that I could see ghosts.
At least math was my one reprieve from Maggie. She just wouldn’t leave me alone about Payne. She wanted details. How could I give her details? And why did a part of me want to? The bell rang, and I groaned. It was time to face Maggie and her romantic inquisition again. I swore this girl watched way too much Lifetime.
When the bell rang, Maggie shot out of her classroom and took to my side. She leaned into my ear as if to tell me a secret.
“Mrs. Ortiz is out,” she said. Mrs. Ortiz is our Spanish teacher. “I heard they got some guy who can’t even say ‘this is my pen’ in Spanish.”
“Well, then he and I should have a lot in common,” I said.
Maggie laughed. “Point is, we can sit in the back and talk. As long as we don’t become loud or disruptive, he’s okay with it, I’ve heard.”
I sighed. “Shouldn’t we do our homework or study or something?”
Maggie stopped dead in her tracks, looking like a puppy I had just kicked. She stared at me with those sad eyes. Did she think I didn’t know I was being played? Did she think I couldn’t see through her crocodile tears?
Then she looked away, and I folded in a heartbeat.
“Okay, we’ll talk,” I gave in with a wince.
A huge smile spread across Maggie’s face, and she started clapping and twirling in a circle.
We arrived in class and Maggie pulled me to the back of the room where we had the least chance of being overheard. We waited until the period started and the dorky looking substitute teacher told us not to get too loud.
“Okay, tell me everything,” Maggie demanded. “Every detail. Don’t leave a single thing out. Did he kiss you? Oh my God! Tell me he kissed you already.”
“Shhh.” Maggie was getting louder with each syllable. “We didn’t kiss. We didn’t hold hands. There was no physical contact whatsoever.”
Maggie looked crestfallen. “None? Are you sure?”
“I’m sure,” I insisted. “I think I’d remember…well, okay. He did kiss me, but…hey, stop clapping. It wasn’t a kiss, kiss. It was just a gentle peck on my forehead. That’s it. Nothing else, I swear.”
Maggie shrugged. “It’s early yet. He has plenty of time to improve his aim for your lips.”
“Ah!” My outburst was enough to earn the disapproving glare from our sub, some guy who looked like he just graduated college and probably had never been kissed himself. In fact, if his polka-dot tie was any indication, that wasn’t likely to remedy itself anytime soon.
“It’s not like that, Maggie. We just talked. Really.”
Maggie leaned closer. “What did you talk about? Your likes and dislikes? If either of you are seeing anyone now? Where he should take you on your first date? Where you’d like to honeymoon? How many kids you’d like to have?”
I slammed my head onto the desk top and started to beat a slow steady rhythm with my forehead. It was really rather soothing.
Maggie was giggling.
I finally looked up at her with one eye.
“Maggie, please,” I begged. “I have nothing to tell you. We just talked. We ran into each other this weekend. We we
re just talking about…”
Maggie leaned even closer, one hand propping up her chin. “Yes?”
“Stuff.”
“Not good enough, sister,” Maggie complained.
I leaned back in my chair and closed my eyes for a moment. I needed to tell Maggie something because she wasn’t about to let up, but I couldn’t tell Maggie about what was really going on.
“Maggie,” I said. “What we talked about wasn’t romantic. Not even close. It was more… family related. Payne wanted to speak to me today because of a family situation. One he thought maybe I could help with. That’s all.”
Maggie nodded as I spoke. She waited a beat when I was done, considering what I said.
“Family stuff?” she echoed. “What kind of family stuff?”
“Private family stuff,” I answered. “His, not mine. I’m supposed to meet up with him after school in the same place. Just to talk. Nothing more. I can’t tell you anymore. It wouldn’t be right.”
“Oh.” Maggie wore a contemplative look. “Okay, I get that.”
I waited for the next array of questions to begin, but they didn’t come. I breathed a sigh of relief. Before long, we each pulled out homework and got busy. When the bell rang, I realized it was the last class of the day. It was time to head home before meeting Payne in the woods. Alone.
Earlier, when I was with Payne, I was certain with all my heart he meant me no harm. But all of the visions of him in my dreams squeezing the life out of me kept flooding back to my mind ever since, as did all of the other far more romantic images of us together. I wasn’t sure what to make of it all. Last night’s nightmare hadn’t helped calm my nerves either.
“Maggie, can I tell you something?”
“Are you nervous,” Maggie asked, “about Payne? I think I understand. Ever since you explained it to me, I’ve been rolling it around. I’ve got to say, I don’t think I like this. This could be bad.”
“You think?” I asked.
“Yeah, I do.” She nodded. “I could be wrong, of course. I hope I am. But considering we’re talking about Payne McKnight and his history, I have to wonder what his intentions are.”
Vision of Shadows Page 6
