by Blue Remy
“We knew it would come to an end when we decided to meet them today, right?”
“Yeah, I guess.” Pudge’s head drops down. “I’ve just never met anyone like him and I don’t think I will again.”
“Yes you will, Pudge! You’re great and any guy would be lucky to have you. Let’s not think about it today, we have the rest of tonight and tomorrow. Then when they pull away we will cry, drown our sorrows in junk food and sappy movies, deal?”
“Deal.” We both laugh and get ready for the show to start.
The fireworks light up the sky as the riders are called out. They stand in a line with a bowl in front of them. One by one they pick a name out of the bowl and the announcer informs the audience which bull is picked for each rider. “Cody Sterling has picked number five. He will be riding Baby Blue. Congratulations guys, let’s have another night of safe rides. Now if everyone can stand for the National Anthem, Miss Megan Donnelly will be singing for us.”
It’s time for Cody! I watch the chute as some of the other riders are there helping ease him down onto the bull. He looks over my way, grinning with a wink. He tugs on his rope that we got ready earlier, his left arm goes up into the air and he nods his head. A man standing outside of the chute pulls the rope, opening up the door, and they come out into the arena. The clock starts ticking.
I can tell this bull is gentler than the one last night, but it doesn’t stop him from going crazy. Baby Blue bucks left and right, his back end and front come off the ground. I feel like this eight seconds is eight hours, I’m so nervous. Finally the buzzer sounds, Cody jumps off, Jake helps get the bull back in the chute and locked up. He controlled the shit outta that bull! I stand up, screaming his name with the rest of the fans, pointing at him. Cody comes over, standing on the gate in front of me. He throws his hat and I catch it before he jumps back down, taking his bow.
“He’s good for you,” Pudge tells me as we wait to hear the scoring, and I put his Stetson on my head.
“Pudge, he leaves tomorrow. Nothing good can come of that.”
“You don’t know that, Sonya! You can see it in his eyes when he looks at you. He’s not gonna want to let you go and maybe this is your chance to get away from all of that shit you do at the club.”
“What am I supposed to do? Jump in his truck and move a thousand miles away from my life for a man I met yesterday? Get real, Pudge, shit like that just doesn’t happen.” Ending the conversation, I start heading down the stadium and towards the stables, with her following closely behind.
Pudge has already found Jake so I stand to the side, waiting for him to come back out from the arena after the scoring. Cody spots me immediately and jogs over, picking me up in a tight hug and spinning me around while we both laugh. “Ninety-three, baby!”
“Congratulations! You did amazing!”
“Leave your car here. Come with me.” His hopeful eyes bore into mine as he sets me back on my feet, and I nod. Cody leads me out, making stops to sign autographs, and I get the stank eye by several women. The only time he lets go of my hand is when he’s signing something.
***
“Where did you find this place?” When we left the fairgrounds, Cody drove us out of town. He parked on a secluded dirt road where we’re lying in the back of his truck, looking up at the stars.
“I asked around. So, tell me about yourself.”
“I already told you, there isn’t much to tell. I’m twenty-two, I graduated college in May. I have always lived here and I work at a clothing store.” I’m not about to tell him the name of Ever’s store.
“You have any family?” Cody’s thumb brushes across the skin of my hand as I stiffen.
“No, it’s just me. That’s enough about me though. I wanna hear about you.”
“Well, it’s just mom and I back home. Ever since I was a little boy, I wanted to ride bulls just like my dad did. I decided not to go to college so I could live my dream. Now, here I am at twenty-four, about to make it happen.”
“What happened to your dad?”
“He got killed while riding.”
“I’m so sorry.”
Cody sits up on one elbow, facing me. He tucks some of the hair that has fallen out of my ponytail behind my ear. “It’s fine, it was a long time ago. Do you know how beautiful you are?”
A lump forms in my throat and I can’t answer, so I just lay here staring at him. He leans in close, he’s about to kiss me, and at the last second I turn my head, the kiss lands on my cheek. “It’s getting late, you should take me to my car.” I climb out of the truck bed and get into the passenger side of the truck.
The whole way back nothing is said. I lean my head on the window and stare out at the empty space and finally the city lights. The whole way, Cody keeps his hand on my thigh, not letting what happened back there bother him. I’ve dodged his kiss more than once and I know he has to be wondering why, but I can’t bring myself to tell him.
***
“It’s about time you got here, Shug. I’ve been waiting a long time for your pretty little ass to show up.” Ghost is already wasted when I walk into the bar.
“Well, I’m here now.” I can hear some of the other girls talking shit so I turn towards them. “You got something you wanna say?”
“I just think it’s funny how you got them waiting for you when you don’t even wanna be here.”
“What, are you jealous, Lilly?”
Her laugh rings out. “What would I have to be jealous about?”
“Well since you’re sitting here, running your mouth,” I start, looking over my shoulder at Ghost, who has a smirk. I point my thumb towards him and go on, “Ghost here has been waiting for me. I think that says everything on its own.”
“You’re a bitch sometimes, you know that, Shug?” Lilly gives me a disgusted look.
“Yeah, and I think you need to go fill that pretty mouth of yours with a fat cock. Mind your business, Lilly, before you end up like Jasmine or Morgan.”
“Fuck you, Shug.”
“Is that all you got? Here’s one for you. Why don’t you take your skanky ass somewhere else? Do something with your motherfucking life, instead of on your back or knees with your pussy and mouth wide the fuck open, begging and waiting. Stop sitting here in your little pathetic fantasy that your gonna become an Ol’ Lady, because honey, it ain’t ever gonna happen. You’re just a sorry bitch that’s gonna be sitting here forever while every single one of these guys will pass you up when they find something better.” With those words, Ghost pulls me away huffing and puffing, because I really wanna go back there and twat punch the fuck outta Lilly.
He shuts the door behind us and I start pulling my clothes off before lying on the bed. “God, she pisses me off. All of them do.”
As Ghost is removing his clothes, he says, “Don’t go thinking you’re better than them, Shug. Just ‘cause you have other shit going on in your life doesn’t mean a thing. You’re still here, naked, lying in my bed with your legs spread open. You’re still a whore, just like them.”
“Excuse me?” My eyes widen, mouth drops open, and I can’t believe he just said that shit to me.
“You heard me, Shug. You’re mistaken if you think you’re ever gonna leave this life. You may not be waiting for one of us like them, but club life is all you’ve ever known.” Ghost gives me a sympathetic look as he rolls the condom on. I don’t want his fucking sympathy, he just pissed me off even more. He doesn’t know shit! I will get out one day.
I jump off the bed, not even bothering to pick up my clothes, and start heading for the door, but he grabs my arm, stopping me. “I’m not doing this tonight.” My body hits the wall, skin to skin, Ghost’s front is to my back.
“Yes you are, whore. It’s your duty to please me. Now shut that smart mouth of yours and spread those legs.” His hot breath hits my ear as the words pour from his drunken mouth. The stench of alcohol makes me want to gag.
I’m not fucking doing this and he isn’t going to make me. �
�Like hell I will.” Rearing my elbow back, I connect with his ribs, making Ghost back away from me. I turn, walk right up to him, and pull my fist back before connecting with his jaw. “Don’t you ever try to make me do shit! I don’t care if I’m a whore here, you won’t fucking touch me if I say no.”
Before I see it coming, the smack lands on my cheek, my flesh stinging from the bite of his hand. “You need to learn your goddamn place here! I’ll be glad to teach it to you, you fuckin’ cunt.” No, he did not just call me a cunt!
Lifting my leg, I kick out as hard as I can, aiming right for his balls. Ghost’s screams fill the room as he drops to the ground, holding his junk. I walk over to his holster, pull out his gun, turn off the safety and shoot him in his thigh. “Now you can call me a fuckin’ cunt, you slimy piece of shit.” I drop the gun and dress quickly. Slamming his door behind me, I walk through the bar and tell the guys someone needs to go look at Ghost.
“What did you do, Shug?” Some of them holler out as they start running for his room.
“I fuckin’ shot him, that’s what I did!” I yell back, continuing on my way to my room.
I head to my bedroom with a smile on my face. I start the shower, turning the water on hot, and as I get in, laughter consumes me. I don’t know if I’m going crazy, but that felt really fucking good. When I get done getting dressed, I pack a bag and hop in my car, heading to Pudge’s. I don’t know what’s going to happen in the future, but I think it’s time for me to move somewhere else. It’s time I had that talk with Hanger.
CHAPTER FOUR
Cody
Sunday
For the first time in my life I feel lost. I’ve always had a plan, a dream, I knew what the hell I was doing, and nothing was going to come in between me and that goal. When I drove away from my home in North Carolina on Wednesday, I never expected to meet someone that would make me question everything just two short days later. But Sonya Collins did. She blew into my life unexpected, and has consumed me without even trying. Thoughts of yesterday play through my mind. It was the best day of my life. How do I go back to living my everyday life after meeting Sonya Collins, my beautiful girl?
For the first time, I met a girl that likes me for me. She doesn’t give a fuck who I am, what I can do for her, or how good she looks on my arm. Jesus Christ, why does she have to live a thousand fucking miles away from me?!
Sitting at the edge of the hotel room bed, I run my hands over my bearded face. I’m tired, I feel like shit because I didn’t sleep worth a fuck last night. Staring at my packed bags by the door, I drop my head and my shoulders sag. “You okay, man?” Jake asks as he walks out of the bathroom.
“No, man I’m not.” He sits down on the bed beside me. His hand grips my shoulder, shaking me a little. “How do I just pick up and leave? How are you holdin’ up, havin’ to leave Pudge?”
“Because we talked about it. I think y’all just avoided the unavoidable, ya know? I don’t think y’all wanted to face what was comin’ today and y’all should have. But you still have today, man. Spend this last day with her and see what happens. There’s always the long distance option.” Jake gets up off the bed to go finish packing the rest of his shit as I sit, thinking about what he just said. Could we have a long distance relationship? I don’t know, but I’d be willing to try.
Standing up from the bed, I walk through the hotel room, making sure I haven’t forgotten anything. I carry my bags down to my truck, throw them in the backseat, and pull out my phone. She answers on the second ring. “Hey.” Her voice quivers just a little, but I catch it.
Closing my eyes, I lean back against my truck so it can keep me on my feet. “Hey, beautiful. I wanna see you.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.” Sonya’s so quiet and I can tell she is holding back tears.
My eyes snap open. No no no. She’s not doing this, I’m not leaving without seeing her one more time. “Why?” My tone is harsher than I wanted it to be. With a couple deep breaths, I calm myself. “Sonya, please don’t do this! I need to see you one last time. Please!” I beg and plead.
“I can’t, I’m sorry. It’s too hard. I thought I would be okay, but I’m not. I can’t handle this, I’m sorry. Good luck in Vegas. I hope you win. Goodbye, Cody.” She hangs up before I can get a word in. I try calling her back a few more times, but it goes straight to voicemail so I know she turned her phone off. Over my dead fucking body will that be our goodbye! I race back up to the room, put the key card in, and open the door. My wild eyes find Jake sitting on his bed, much how I was just a little while ago, but the phone is to his ear.
“Who are you talking to?” My voice comes out angry, making Jake’s head snap up in my direction.
“What’s wrong?” His expression turns to worry.
“Are you talking to Pudge?”
“Yeah, why?”
“Ask her where Sonya is.” Jake asks her what I told him to, his face turns pale and eyes connect with mine.
“She doesn’t want to see you, man.”
“Give me the phone.” I try calming myself.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Give me the goddamn phone!” The harsh, no-nonsense tone has Jake handing it over.
“Best friend or brother, you upset her and we are gonna have problems.” I ignore him.
“Pudge, please. I need you to tell me where she is.”
I hear the deep inhale and exhale she does before saying, “Cody, she doesn’t want to see you.”
“Pudge, listen to me. I can’t let this be our goodbye. I need to see her before we leave. As crazy as this sounds, I’m falling in love with her.”
“It doesn’t sound crazy at all. I see it in your eyes every time you look at her. She’s at my apartment with me. Jake was gonna stop by anyway. Just don’t tell her I told you she’s here.” Smiling and feeling just a little bit calmer, I hand the phone back to Jake. His body visibly relaxes when he knows he won’t have to try protecting Pudge from me. Looks like I’m not the only one messed up over a woman.
When Jake hangs up, we check out of the hotel and head over to the apartment. “I’m glad I don’t have to beat the shit outta you,” Jake jokingly tells me.
“You could try.” We both laugh. Just like me, Jake has never been hung up on a girl before, much less wanted to fight me to protect.
We pull into the apartment complex about fifteen minutes later. I turn my truck off, we get out and I hit the key fob, locking the doors as we head for apartment 5b. Taking the stairs leading to the second story, I feel my heart beating rapidly like it wants to burst out of my chest. As we stand at the door, Jake gives a light knock and it doesn’t take long for Pudge to answer. Jake pulls her into his arms while she looks at me and quietly tells me, “She’s in the room on the right.”
I slowly open the door, noticing the light is off, but as the door opens more, it spills in from the hallway. My girl is laying on her stomach, face buried in a pillow and her shoulders are shaking. It breaks my fucking heart to see her like this. “Pudge, I don’t want to talk right now. Just please shut the door.” Her voice is ragged from the crying she has been doing.
I get the door completely open, but I don’t move any closer. “Hey, beautiful.” Sonya’s body shoots up into a sitting position. That’s when I see it, the bruise on her cheek that wasn’t there yesterday. In a flash, I’m at the end of the bed. I drop to my knees and gently cup her face with my hands. “Who did that to you?”
“No one you wanna mess with. Don’t worry though, I took care of it.” She gives me a small smile, but I’m not fucking smiling.
“Is this the reason you didn’t wanna see me? I want you to tell me who did it.”
“Yes.” Sonya tries dropping her head, but I won’t let her. “Cody, my life isn’t a pretty one. There are things in my past, shit, it’s not even my past, it was my present until yesterday. I’m not going to taint you with it so please just let it be.”
I don’t want to fight wit
h her before I leave so I’ll let it go for now. “Will you spend the day with me, beautiful?”
“I’d like to, but I don’t feel like going anywhere.”
“We don’t have to go anywhere. We can lay here, just let me hold you.”
“That sounds really nice.” Her smile grows and I return it with one of my own.
“Lie down,” I tell her as I start taking my boots off, then turn my ball cap around. I climb onto the full size mattress next to her, lying on my back, I pull Sonya as close as I can get her. Gently, I press her head down onto my chest then wrap my arms around her. I stare at the ceiling thinking about what she said and wondering what kind of life she has had. I will get her to trust me and she’ll tell me. It might take her some time and I won’t pressure her, but I will get Sonya to open up. “Why were you cryin’?”
“Because I thought I wasn’t going to be able to see you. I was embarrassed. I didn’t want you to see me like this.”
“Don’t be embarrassed.” I slip a hand under her shirt, running my fingertips across the soft skin of her lower back. “I don’t want this to end, Sonya. When I walk out that door to leave, I want you to be mine. I want to call you and text you. I want to come back and see you, or you come see me. But I don’t ever wanna see you cryin’ because you are sad or unhappy. I only want you to cry tears of joy and happiness that I bring to you. I’m fallin’ hard and fast for you, baby, and I promise I’ll make you happy.”
“Cody...”
I place a kiss on the top of her head. “Shh, don’t say anything. Just let me hold you.” I stopped her from saying anything more because I don’t think I could handle her rejection right now. Her hand slips under my flannel, fingers lightly tracing over my abs and the trail of hair that leads to my twitching cock.
I know it’s probably insane to feel the way I do about a woman that I have barely touched. I haven’t even kissed her because she pulls away every time I get close. I can’t say it doesn’t hurt like a sonofabitch every time, but I won’t ever make her do something she isn’t comfortable with. I know she has feelings for me, but something is holding her back and I’ll give her the time she needs to work it out. I feel it deep in my soul that this girl was made for me though, so I won’t give up. She may not know it, and I may not know about her life, but what we have is so beautifully twisted there is no going back.
