A few murmurs rumbled through the crowd, mostly in language I could not understand. But familiar, as the sound of exhaled breath over different voices, making it sound like an orchestra of wind surrounding the vicinity.
Rolun stood at my side, wearing a wreath of moon lilies around his head, as did I. The pale lilac matched what I assume was truly a traditional garb for such occasions. I crossed my arms in front of me as I waited nervously for the other participants to join. The thin fabric of the dress I was wearing, which I was told was made of spider silk, was too revealing for a lady of stature, but I wasn't going to give up this opportunity to be given some type of freedom, rather than being locked away like a monster.
The long white gown had drapes of fabric across the front and back, the sides cut out to reveal my hips and legs, exposing bare feet. Although the shawl across the front and back had the body fully covered, it was almost completely see through, so while beautiful, did nothing to uphold my decency.
Suddenly, the crowd went silent. The crowd parted instantaneously, allowing the leader of this parade through. Faariin, of course. Wearing similar white, thin clothing, but with fanciful brocades and designs throughout his long-sleeved tunic and billowing pants. His face was stone, bereft of any emotions. Atop his head was a large circlet, that held up a heavy rack of antlers. Adorned in similar flowers that Rolun and I both wore.
Four other faeries followed behind, on their shoulders, bearing a small piece of wood that had pieces of clothing tied around it. Wrapped within many layers of the similar spider silk to the point of obscurity. I clenched my jaw, daring a whisper toward Rolun. "What is that?" He reached up, grabbing my hand, and giving it a squeeze. "The dryad's clothing, and the wood from its tree." I nodded, standing to attention once more.
Two of the guards were Batik, and as Rolun told me of the female, Ley. She was wearing the same outfit as I, though nowhere near as embarrassed. Batik's outfit, as well as the other two male faeries, were similar to Faariin’s but much less elegant in design.
Faariin parted to the right of the circle, while the others carrying the wood parted to the left, slowly, feet walking in tandem with each other until they were completely on opposite sides. Slowly, and tentatively did they place the wrapped belongings of the dryad onto the edge of the circle. All rising and in a smooth motion their hands lifting toward the air, Faariin shouting out loud first. "Blessed be the fae that fall."
And in return did the other four fae call out to him, "Blessed to hear nature's call."
"Blessed be the fae that see."
"Blessed in this revelry."
Revelry? Was this a celebration or a funeral? I tightened my hand on Rolun's, who gripped my own tighter in understanding.
"Blessed is our friend who's passed."
"Blessed are those held steadfast."
The four fae on the opposing side of the circle lowered their hands, each one reaching out to the other, holding hands as Faariin's face turned upward. The moonlight shining on him making his already pale appearance glow as if he was taking the light within himself. His eyes were shut as he continued to speak,
"Forever may this fae know peace, and in nature find his heart at ease."
"Forever nature's embrace we yearn, and upon our death to her embrace return."
Faariin let his hands fall to his sides, and as he did, the four others grabbed the sides of the wooden planks and walked toward the center of the cinders, their faces remaining as calm as ever, despite the smoke rising from their steps where they walked upon the coals. Only a few slight winces from them, though otherwise there was no show of pain. They set the wood and clothing down, then parted equally around the circle with Faariin still remaining in his initial location.
He drew forth a blade, the handle a simple ivory. Stepping forth, he placed the blade into his hand, slicing through his flesh and reaching outward. I found myself to be the only one wincing at the sight of it. His fingers extended outward and splayed, allowing the blood to drip just within the lines of the circle.
An eerie, telling silence followed as the crowd slowly began to put their heads down, eyes shut almost as if they were praying. Collectively in their minds, the hearts in unison. Even Rolun, as I glanced from the corner of my eyes. In respect, I found myself doing the same thing as them. For several minutes we remained, standing still in silence. Only once the voice boomed forth did we all look up.
"The blood of one of the immortal seals our pact. Nature takes the life she gives, and we honor our fallen brethren. Be at peace and look upon us." Faariin turned, looking out around him toward the fae that stood about.
"If there be one who wishes to speak in reverence, come forth or remain in your mourning."
I didn't need the release of Rolun's hand to know it was my time. It was finally time for me to try to ask for forgiveness on behalf of humankind. I stepped forward from the back of the crowd. Some of the fae quiet, some dressed like myself I noticed. All were in white. Many seemed surprised I, the human, wished to speak. I could hear the murmurs again.
Faariin seemed surprised as well, his eyes widening before snapping back to their typical unreadable state. "Yes, human," he said and I walked forward. My eyes crawling across the vast sea of fae that looked on at me. It made me uneasy. I was standing a few feet in front of Faariin, who waited patiently for me to move or do anything.
I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do with myself. Do I stand here facing him? Facing the crowd? Should I kneel or bow or do something else? Sweat began to drip from my brow. I wasn't sure if it was from the heat of the crackling embers of the wood within the circle or from my nerves. With nothing else to go on besides the obscure rhymes of the books, I stepped closer to Faariin. He didn't react, but the murmurs did not subside either.
Was that the wrong move?
I knelt, getting onto both of my knees before him and cradling myself forward, directly below his line of sight.
"I ask...." I began. Choking on my next words. I needed to push forth all the truest, rawest emotions I felt inside. I lifted my head up slightly, and the whisperings continued. No one telling them to hush. I gulped.
Turning my head back down, I tried hard to remind myself how I felt. Seeing how they basically tortured this fae. How they cheered and jaunted. How they danced in the streets at this creature bereft of life. How they left it to rot, and how separate I felt from my people.
I remembered how my mother doted on faeries, how she loved everything about them and put that love into me. How people called her a blasphemer, and she didn't care. She loved them and trusted faeries even into her hysteria. She still loved the books I read to her. And I grew to love them too.
I took in a deep breath. "I ask for forgiveness. On behalf of all humankind. I ask for this fae's soul to give me that forgiveness. And to not hold hatred in its heart as my people held in theirs."
Tears began to stream down from my face at an uncontrollable rate, though I did not bother to wipe them away. I let the droplets fall to the ground, staining their earth as I mourned.
"I ask that any hatred the fae have for their ignorance be placed on me. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for what they've done."
The wind of calm. It came over me, and I found the courage to look up. Peering into my eyes were the cold, fully black eyes of Faariin. And he only stared. I felt as if maybe I hadn't done exactly what was right, what I needed to do, until the flames behind him grew bright as the fire picked up. I winced, shielding my eyes from the brightness as the flames grew large and tall, the tongues lapping at some of the overarching trees, though the leaves did not catch fire.
I almost drew back but kept my composure as the fae in front of me turned to the fire. A different look on his face. Not that cold, calculating wall of stone, but a softened one. The others within the crowd hushed as the flames grew bright, their eyes turning toward the fire that danced around.
Faariin spoke quietly, perhaps mostly to himself, but loud enough for me to hear. Even if anyone else
within the crowd could not.
"She is forgiven."
The other four fae found their way around the spire of flame and toward us, their faces sharing the same look of surprise and inexplicable joy. Two from either side, flanking me as I rose to my feet. Faariin's back to me still as his hands went wide in the air again, "They have passed on!" he called out, and the cheers that rang out through the circle was loud enough to make me want to cover my ears. The gathering of fae cheered happily, and some began to bang on small drums in a unified beat, the masses pouring forth and filling the space that was bereft of their kind.
Some started to dance, cry, or both at once in celebration of what I could only assume was a success.
No longer did they pay me heed.
Faariin turned back to me, casting me a look I could not read, and exiting the frenzy of fae in celebration in an instant. The four other fae followed him as he walked out the way they had entered.
To say the least, I was confused about the whole thing. I had questions, I wanted to ask what I was to do now as I stood, but a hand found purchase on my shoulder, bringing me out of my confused daze. I spun around quickly to find Vethari standing there. Which was a bit strange as I hadn't seen him with the crowd when The Passage first started. I pushed the thought from my head, looking up at him as others danced around us.
"That was... good," he managed to say.
A smile managed to pull my face. "Was it?"
A single nod. "I've seen only a handful of humans in my life participate in The Passage. This is only the second time it was successful."
"Then I suppose that I did do good. Thank you." The hand that he placed upon my shoulder didn't move. And the heat grew warm, as did the one that grew to my face as I flushed. The look on his face, the smile. The first time I had seen a genuine one there since we came to his realm.
It was beautiful in its sincerity.
I seemed lost in thought before the hand being removed from my shoulder brought me to. I blinked several times, as Vethari nodded toward the dancing amongst us, "Quite the ill-excuse, but wouldn't you rather sit down?" he inquired. His nose wrinkled as he watched many a fae twirl and skip around us. I nodded, no need for dancing for me. Not on this day.
I felt as though there was some sort of vulnerability that opened almost all these peoples up. Giving them not one inhibition to release them from their celebration of a friend moving on into a blissful afterlife. I wondered if faeries could go to the Everafter, too.
We sat down beside the carved throne, just enough out of the way to not be trampled on, but still close enough to feel a tinge of warmth from the bonfire and watch the others dancing and laughing. I smiled, my head bobbing slightly to the left and right to some unnamed tune of drums and a flute being played. They weren't all bad. Definitely not.
At that thought, I slid my eyes over Vethari's form, peering toward him slowly upward until they rested on his face. He seemed to also be watching the others dancing, though his gaze was more calculating and watchful. Ever the careful warrior.
"Vethari, you said I couldn't trust you before," I began, his attention snapping to me. "But you also say that I will be taken back home after the Great Hunt?" I squinted toward him, "So why can I not trust you?"
He didn't make a face or any move to suggest the question was uncomfortable, but he remained contemplative.
"There is not a fae in this world who is all good." He gestured toward the crowd with the rise of his chin, "Even them. You must remember. Fae are just people, as humans are just people. There is good and bad within all of us. We are not deities. Even if some of your stories think so." Turning back from the crowd to face him, I had only then realized how close we were sitting next to each other, and I allowed my bare leg to give way to its weight. Skin contacting skin as it fell to rest against Vethari's own usual bare legs. His sigh darted toward that, a hand twitching to just barely reach one of the weapons on his bandolier, but the pause he allowed himself had him gazing from the leg and up, pausing on my chest before slowly making its way up to my own stare.
After everything, even after the initial rough capture. After meeting fae like Rolun and Calidi and Ke, I had no reason to worry about being here. Maybe I could view this as an extended trip to another world, and not have to worry about going home. I could relax, as long as I wasn't alone.
I dared to reach a hand up, placing it onto his chest and as my thumb could feel the leather going across that held his weapons, I wanted to feel it. And I did. The slow, continued thud of a heart beat within him. Though it didn't thunder as loudly as mine did at my boldness. Neither did he break sight as he continued to stare at my face in silence.
Oh, the boldness I had right now. And the small throb I felt in my core.
I dared to trace my hand upward, close to his collarbones. I gently slid my fingers across. This is what fae skin felt like. It was unbelievably smooth and not marred in any way, though his pectoral muscle twitched in reflex as my hand raised above it. Then I was slowly raising my hand to his face.
And I was thwarted.
I let out a small peep in surprise as his hand grabbed my wrist tightly with such speed I hadn't had a chance to see it coming. His sight remained still and unmoving on me through my exploration of his flesh, and now that I had been stopped, my face felt heated in embarrassment. Why did I even bother with such a thing!
Beside from the fact that he was an impeccable spectacle to behold. Every last ounce of him, in fact.
"We may have laid together once," he began, the grip on my wrist almost painful, though I made no protest as I started to feel the embarrassment double, "and you are not the unsightliest of humans."
I winced.
"But I do have plans. Plans that I need to keep together with the humans upon returning you to the humans unspoiled." He rose from his seated position and I realized maybe I had ended things all too quickly, though he pulled me up with him. I tumbled slightly, closing the gap between us as he released my wrist and I fell to rest against him. Hands sprawled on his upper abdomen. I allowed myself to interrupt, "You promised them this?" If he did, then he couldn't go against his word as fae.
He stopped to think for a moment before something different came across his eyes. A strange, mysterious glint as his right hand squeezed my waist, his smile growing wide and bestial. "I made no such promise." The growl under his breath made me retract my fingers from him. In fear and desire, both emotions intermingling with one another to the point where it was going to drive me mad.
"Then why won't you have me again?" These words coming from my mouth felt almost slurred, though I hadn't had anything to drink besides from a waterskin all day. These words did not feel like mine. Nothing I had ever said to anyone before. So why did I speak them now? I wanted to ask myself that but, at the same time, I did not care. I wanted this fae before I went back to my human lands. Wanted him to claim me again, to drag each one of his individually pointed teeth across my flesh.
His face was almost frightening in the way it was absolutely handsome, and as he was about to reply, there was a clearing of a throat. Both of our heads snapping around to spot Faariin in front of us. A glare, glancing between both of us. I looked back to Vethari for but a moment, noticing his face had gone stoic once more, his posture completely straight, while I was still leaned into him, my lips parted and my chest heaving as I breathed heavily with desire. It must have looked odd.
He paid no heed to me as the pale fae's glare then focused entirely on Vethari. "There was a commotion within the outer walls. The others are out scouting, why don't you join them. It is a requirement of your station to defend and protect, especially during large gatherings such as this." The glare faded, and his face became emotionless. His brows remaining just slightly furrowed.
Vethari snorted, turning toward me, giving me a look before darting off quickly enough that I stumbled forward again, trying to catch myself, only to be righted by Faariin. I inspected his face as I straightened up, before backi
ng away.
"You should be more careful. He is a dangerous man." I halted in my steps at the pale lithe figure of this fae. As unreadable as usual, his furrowed brows turned upward, almost as if he looked sad. His sights taking in not the dancers, but something beyond them. Something beyond anything here.
"How so?"
"All fae are fickle. But the Unseelie are especially volatile."
14
I hadn't really taken to heart what Faariin had told me the week of the Passage. Or at least, I hadn't allowed myself to. There was something off about him and his character. Both warm and cold, but I kept feeling as though he was hiding something. Even though he seemed to lead this troupe of courtless fae, and they seemed to put faith in him wholeheartedly. I was not going to do so. Even if Vethari himself told me I couldn't trust him.
I shuddered at the thought of him, how warm his skin felt against my fingertips. That bestial grin on his face made the blood in my veins turn thick with lust. I shook my head, right arm turning off kilter at the thoughts I found myself in as the arrow released, not hitting the center of the target Calidi had placed for me, but still hitting the board off to the far right. Damn.
Rolun chortled, snorting in laughter with bells sounding as Ke also giggled with glee.
Calidi palmed her face, shaking her head in frustration. "It seems as if I'm not going to get my assistant after all." I had been trying to hit that damnable target with everything I had, but something within me just could not do it. No matter how hard I tried. Arrow after arrow, taking a pause to sharpen their edges, and continuing. The only thing that made me want to continue was the teasing banter from Rolun mocking me.
Without waiting for command, I drew forth an arrow and let it fly with only a moment of aim.
Solitary Fae (Humans vs Fae Book 2) Page 9
