by J. H. Croix
“You get all this info from her?” I asked, teasing but also curious.
Janet smiled slyly. “I got it from her mother. Jasmine’s almost like a daughter to me.”
“Happy to help. Let me know when I’m cleared to talk to her about it.”
“Of course.”
Dropping my change in the tip jar, I gave her a wave as I left and headed down to pick up the pizza. Alpenglow Pizza had opened within the year after another pizza place had closed. In a short time, they’d quickly become popular and were definitely the go-to place for everyone at Willow Brook Fire & Rescue when we wanted pizza. With a wood fired oven and a varying menu, their pizzas were delicious and their service prompt.
The armload of pizzas I’d called in on my way to get coffee was ready, and I was headed back down Main Street within minutes. My mind kept looping back to Jasmine. She was independent and had a fiery streak. I’d seen it that first night when she hauled off and punched the asshole who’d grabbed her ass.
I’d become well-acquainted with her fiery side. Every time we were close, she nearly burned me up. Just like Janet, I was on Team Jasmine. I’d do whatever she needed for her studio if that meant she’d be staying in Willow Brook.
The day was fortunately busy after I returned to the station, and we scarfed down the pizza. We got called out to a small local fire, and on my way home, I went to help get Herman out of one of his favorites trees. Herman was the beloved cat of Carrie Dodge, an elderly woman who lived alone. The rascally cat was prone to climbing high in trees and getting stuck. This occurred with such frequency that all the firefighters in Willow Brook had helped her at one point or another. We’d purchased Carrie’s excavator from her after she tumbled into a ditch in it one year. Now, the rather pricey piece of equipment sat idle in her yard until Herman got stuck in a tree and we used the bucket to get him down. Ridiculous, I know. But it worked.
After handing Herman over and getting a wide smile from Carrie, I climbed into my truck. With every free moment, all I could think about was getting home to Jasmine.
As I stopped at the end of Carrie’s driveway before turning onto the highway, my phone vibrated. When I glanced at the screen and saw my mother’s number, I was surprised. Mama was a scheduled kind of person. She called me when I wasn’t out dealing with a fire, usually on a Saturday morning. This was out of the ordinary for her. Answering, I knew from her tone right away that something was wrong.
“What is it, Mama?”
“Oh hon, I’m so sorry to call you like this. I’m not sure how you’ll feel about it, but I thought you needed to know.”
My gut churned, even though I had no idea what she was about to tell me. “Okay, what is it, Mama?”
“It’s Bill. He got badly injured in a fire and he’s in the hospital. He’s not expected to make it.”
I gripped the phone in my hand, silent long enough that my mother spoke again.
“Donovan, honey, are you with me?”
Her soft Southern drawl soothed me somehow. She was right. I needed to know about this. My hand tightened on the phone as my heart pounded, its beat rapid and erratic.
Bill and I hadn’t spoken in almost three years. Oh, don’t go thinking I was hung up on Katie. I’d moved on from her long ago. In hindsight, I could see all the reasons why she wasn’t right for me, all the signs I’d missed. Yet, Bill had been my friend, my best friend. The kind of friend I hadn’t had since.
As life rolled along, you learned you could remake parts of your life, have a do-over, so to speak. You could never change the past, but you could try to get it right the second time. Hearing that Bill might die sent my mind spinning back to my last phone call with him.
It was right after I’d moved up here, not long after the news reached me that he and Katie broke up. Not a shocker. It felt like she’d blown our friendship to pieces, and it killed him. She’d gone on to cheat on him too. He’d called to tell me how sorry he was and how much he’d fucked up. At the time, I figured it served him right to get screwed over.
As angry as I’d been then, over time, the anger faded and dissipated. Mostly, I missed Bill. Now, he might be dying.
“I’m here, Mama. Where is he?”
“His mama called me. They airlifted him to a hospital in Denver. I guess his crew was at a fire in the mountains nearby. His parents are flying out tonight.”
I swallowed through the sudden knot of emotion in my chest and throat. In a flash, I knew the meaning of forgiveness. Just like that. In the end, Bill’s betrayal was smaller than my friendship with him. I’d ignored his attempt to mend fences. I’d just wanted to move on.
“You’ll call me if you get an update?”
“Yes, honey. I asked his mama to give me a call when they landed.”
Another rub in Bill’s betrayal had been the fact our parents were best friends. I was fairly certain his mama had ripped him a new one when everything went down. Somehow, our parents had stayed close.
Once Bill and Katie were over for good, every so often, my mama gently suggested maybe I should give Bill a call.
I took a deep breath and let it out, regret washing over me. The kernel of bitterness was gone. I guessed it had been for some time, but I hadn’t bothered to do anything about it.
“You call me when they get there. I’ll see if I can take some time off.”
“Of course, honey,” my mama said.
After I ended the call, all I could think was I needed to see Jasmine.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Jasmine
I leaned on the counter while Lucy put some dishes in the dishwasher, and Levi fed Ham pieces of lettuce by the table. I’d stopped by to have dinner with them, still out of sorts inside. I rarely had asthma attacks any more. I was careful about always having an inhaler handy. Yet, something about that and being home had tripped a switch in my brain.
“Levi,” I called as I turned to approach the table.
Levi feeding Ham was Levi at his absolute least intimidating, so I figured now was a good time to bring up a potentially difficult topic. I didn’t really care about having this conversation in front of Lucy. Another mark in her favor as the best sister-in-law ever—she wasn’t judgmental.
“Jazzy,” he replied. He was one of the very few people who used that nickname with me occasionally.
I decided to just cut to the chase. Slipping into the chair across from him, I caught his eyes. “I need to say I’m sorry. I think it’s about seventeen years overdue.”
He looked confused for a beat, but then his gaze cleared. “For that?”
I knew precisely what he meant by that. My cheeks got hot, and I nodded. I took a deep breath, letting it out with a sigh. “Ever since then, I always thought you were too overprotective.”
Lucy called over. “I might agree with that.”
Her levity was welcome because I’d seen the lines of tension start to tighten on Levi’s face. His shoulders rose and fell with a deep breath.
“Anyway, I was thinking about things the other day, and I guess maybe I understand why.”
“You almost died,” he said softly, pausing to give Ham another piece of lettuce.
The sweet little brown and white hamster somehow made this moment all okay. The sound of the dishwasher closing was loud in the room. Glancing over to Lucy, I realized Levi had probably never told her the story, based on the look on her face.
Looking back to Levi, I replied, “I know. I can’t change what happened, but I hate that there’s this little thing between us where you get protective and then I get tense. You’re an awesome brother. I know that, even if I get cranky about how much you worry sometimes.”
Lucy quietly slipped into the chair between us. Levi hadn’t replied, his throat moving as he swallowed.
I glanced to Lucy. “I’m guessing you didn’t hear the story?”
She shook her head.
“You know I have asthma, right?” At her nod, I continued. “I’ll give you the really short version
. We were young, and it was summer. Summer in Alaska is weird because the greenery explodes all at once, you know?”
She smiled a little. I took a deep breath and looked to Levi. He was quiet, but listening. “Anyway, Levi was going to hike with some friends, and I wanted to tag along, so I begged him to let me come. He let me and my friends come with them. There was nothing unusual about the day. Our parents were having lunch at Wildlands.” I paused to take another breath and a sip of wine. “I forgot my inhaler. I knew I forgot it, but I didn’t want to go back. The pollen was awful, and we were walking through the grass. I had an asthma attack. Levi had to carry me all the way back. It was awful. Or at least I think it was. I don’t remember much except I could hardly breathe. I remember how scared he looked and the look on my parents’ faces when we got back to Wildlands. That might be why he’s kind of opinionated about my life.”
I traced a circle on the table and looked over at Levi, who was trailing his fingers over Ham’s back. Maybe this wasn’t much, but the tension had simmered between Levi and me for years ever since that happened.
“Oh. That explains a lot,” Lucy said softly.
Levi’s eyes cut to her. She reached over and squeezed his hand. “Babe, you’re laidback and easygoing, most of the time. Not so much when it comes to your family, and even less so when it comes to Jasmine. That’s all.”
She looked at me, cocking her head to one side. “I never had an older brother, but I get not appreciating people worrying about you. I always thought you two were so lucky because you adore each other. But every so often things get tense, and it makes me sad.”
Tears threatened, but I took a breath and pushed through the feeling. “Is it that obvious?”
“Actually, no. It’s just every once in a while, like a flare-up.”
I chewed on the corner of my mouth, catching Levi’s eyes. “It’s not like I think you’re gonna stop worrying. I guess I can take it as a compliment.”
Levi barked a laugh. “Yeah, that day was pretty scary. And you’re stubborn as hell.”
There was a lot left unsaid, but then words weren’t what we really needed. I suppose I just needed to acknowledge that I understood how that day had affected us.
“I’m still gonna worry,” he added.
“I know,” I managed with a slow smile.
Somehow, that was enough to kick through the emotional dam between Levi and me. It wasn’t huge, it wasn’t earth-shattering, but it was enough. As Lucy had pointed out, we adored each other. That event had been like a pebble in a shoe. Every so often, the rub would hurt.
For me, it was more about recognizing how that event had affected us and acknowledging how terrifying it must’ve been for him. He would always be my older brother, and he would still be overprotective, but I might have more patience with it.
Conversation moved onto lighter matters. When I stood to leave, Levi pulled me into one of his bear hugs, lifting me off the floor. When he set me down, he grinned.
“Love you, sis,” he said.
I leaned up, kissing him on the cheek. “Always love you.”
Lucy walked me out to the car, pausing beside it as I climbed in. “Thank you,” she said, when I glanced up.
“For what?”
“I think that meant a lot to Levi. He never mentioned what happened.”
“I gathered. I suppose it was bigger in my mind than his.”
Lucy shrugged and smiled. “Either way, I’m glad I know. You mean so much to him.” Leaning over, she gave me a quick hug.
I needed that too. When she stepped back, she closed the door for me. With a wave, I backed up, watching through my rearview mirror as Levi met her outside, catching her hand in his.
As overdue as that conversation had been, it left my emotions right at the surface of my skin. I felt exposed and raw.
Donovan immediately filled my thoughts. With the texts from Glen, more and more, I was realizing how little Glen and I had had together.
I had settled for him, settled for someone who, on the surface, I thought was a good bet. It wasn’t as if things had been God-awful. They hadn’t. They’d just been okay.
With Donovan … Well, it was far more than okay. The sex was beyond anything I could’ve imagined. With the way I felt tangled up with him, I was starting to worry my heart was already in far too deep.
As I drove home, I wondered if I would see him tonight. It was impossible not to wonder, not with him living right across the hallway. When I pulled up at the B&B and saw his truck, my heart immediately began pounding. Butterflies took flight in my belly, the wild flutter so sudden I felt dizzy.
This wasn’t just desire, and I knew it. I couldn’t even imagine letting myself get in too deep with Donovan. Yet, I was already tumbling hard and fast, free falling into him.
You don’t know if you’re going to see him. He’s probably tired from work. Just go to bed. Don’t have any expectations.
That was my little lecture as I let myself in. The downstairs was dark and quiet. The light was on in the hallway, casting a soft glow down the stairs, and my footsteps echoed as I made my way up. Cresting onto the landing, I felt Donovan’s presence before I even saw him.
Looking ahead, I saw him standing in the hallway with his shoulder resting against the wall. One hand was tucked in his pocket, tugging his jeans down just enough that I could see a strip of skin between his T-shirt and the waistband of his jeans.
I didn’t know what I saw in his eyes, but it was intense and solely focused on me. He didn’t move as I approached him, my heartbeat running wild and heat spiraling through me, flushing me from head to toe.
When I stopped in front of him, the last strike of my heel was loud in the hallway. When I looked up, I sensed that he was hurting emotionally somehow. Flying blind, my reaction was automatic.
“Are you okay?” I asked, reaching out to catch his hand in mine.
He was still and quiet for a beat and then he shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“Is there anything I can do?”
His shoulder lifted in another half-shrug. Pushing off the wall, he slipped his hand out of his pocket, lifting it to catch the ends of my hair and twirl a lock of hair around his fingers.
“I need you,” he murmured.
The gruff sound of his voice and the heated look in his eyes gripped me and sent a hot jolt of need through me. There was no way I could have resisted him. All I had to do was look at Donovan, and I practically melted at his feet.
With his eyes on me and his hand threading into my hair, he stole my breath as he fit his mouth over mine. Donovan wasn’t a man to kiss with any hesitation. He devoured my mouth, and I loved every second of it. There was something delicious about surrendering to him, to the intensity of the desire.
I tumbled into the fire willingly, wanting it. It was almost frightening, yet it was so overpowering I loved every minute of it. We spun in the hallway until my shoulder blades landed against the wall. He broke free from our kiss, trailing a searing path down my neck, his lips, teeth, and tongue sending hot shivers racing through me.
I could feel the intensity of emotion, could sense that he was trying to lose himself in us, in me. When he rocked his hips against mine, I bit my lip to hold in the moan at the feel of his hard, hot length against me. I needed to taste him.
He was hurting and in pain. I didn’t know why, and I didn’t even know how I knew; I just did. I wanted to make him feel better, to help him lose himself in me the way he did the same for me.
Spinning quickly, I pushed him against the wall. Stepping back, I slid my palm over the hard ridge of his cock. With a few quick flicks, I unbuttoned his fly and slipped my hand down into his briefs, shimmying them down just enough for his cock to spring free.
His breath hissed through his teeth as I curled my fist around his shaft, looking up at him as his head fell back against the wall with a thud. His eyes met mine, his gaze dark. The look in his eyes sent a surge of power through me. It was a heady feeling, kno
wing that I affected him as powerfully as he affected me. With Donovan, I didn’t ever get caught up in my head, worrying if what I was doing was enough.
Everything between us was give and take, push and pull. Giving was the same as taking. It was an elemental dance of need and release. Slipping my tongue out, I swiped the drop of pre-cum beading at the top of his cock.
“Jasmine,” he murmured, his fingers tightening in my hair.
Shifting down onto my knees, I swirled my tongue around the thick head. Dragging my tongue on the underside of his cock, watching as his eyes fell closed, I savored the sound of his low groan. I swirled my tongue around the tip again and then sucked him into my mouth.
“Fuck, sugar, that feels so damn good,” he growled.
I looked up as I tilted my head back, drawing my tongue along the underside of his cock again and gripping his balls lightly with my hand. His eyes opened, his gaze dark and heavy as he stared at me.
I tasted the salty tang of his pre-cum. It was like a little drug, a tiny hit of it to the back of my throat as it spun across my tongue. I sucked him in again, his cock wet and slick. My palm got wet as I stroked up and down, pumping him with my mouth and hand. His head slammed to the wall again, his fingers gripping my hair roughly.
Then, he was coming, his hot release filling my mouth as I swallowed it down.
I drew back slowly with a last swirl of my tongue around the thick head of his cock. When I was standing, I opened my mouth to say something but before I could, he fit his mouth over mine in another deep, intense kiss. If I wondered if he cared at all that he’d just come in my mouth, his kiss erased any questions on that matter.
With one hand tangled in my hair and his other cupping my cheek, he kissed me as if the world was about to end. Then, we were spinning against the wall again, and fell through the first door we reached, which happened to be mine.
Chapter Twenty-Five
