by Mj Fields
He heard her turn off the bath water and knocked on the door.
���Collin, please don���t.���
He sat and leaned on the door and pet the dog.
���We need to talk Tessa.���
���Then talk Collin.���
���Where the hell have you been all night?��� he demanded.
���Out with friends,��� she snapped
���What friends?��� he sounded angry.
She was amused ���What does it matter?���
���I want to know, who the hell were you with?���
���Collin, I went to dinner with friends, and then I went to the store and bought some CD���s for the kids.���
���Friends, you have friends here? Bullshit Tessa!���
���Collin you���re scaring me,��� she whispered. She could hear him trying to open the door, ���it���s locked.���
���Not for long��� he popped the lock and walked in.
���Seriously, Collin,��� she said as she grabbed a towel and covered herself.
He was livid, his eyes red, jaw clenched, the veins popping out of his neck, ���Who Tessa? Who were you with?���
She stood up with the wet towel and wrapped it around her, she tried to walk out the door and he moved in her way blocking the entire door.
She stood and looked at him, ���Move Collin, I���m wet and cold!���
Collin handed her another towel and looked up, she turned around and wrapped the dry towel around herself, tucked it into the front and turned back around, she walked toward him and he stood still.
���I want you to move, Collin,��� she said softly.
���I want you to tell me who you were with tonight,��� he insisted standing with his legs apart and arms crossed.
���I already told you,��� he looked hot when he was angry, she thought, seriously shouldn���t this make me nervous?
She walked closer to him and stopped and looked up at him. She gently took his arms and uncrossed them, she slowly turned her back towards him and brought his arm with her, she could feel him relaxing. She could feel each hot breath he took against the back of her neck; she threw his arm up and ducked under it, and ran out of the bathroom and slammed the door in his face.
���You suck, Abraham!��� she ran up the stairs.
She ran in her room and slammed the door, she ran into the closet and threw on a tee shirt and underpants, and he walked in. She scowled at him and walked past him. He didn���t try to stop her. He followed her down the stairs; she grabbed her phone and pushed a few buttons. She pushed past him and grabbed her laptop and sat on the couch, he sat next to her. Logging onto Facebook as he looked over her shoulder, he saw a picture of her and two women at a local restaurant, and she tagged her friend Jade in it.
Your fill in, she posted.
She got up and left her computer opened and went to the kitchen and grabbed the bag of CD���s and threw them on his lap, he looked in the bag.
���Satisfied!���
He looked at her, ���Not yet.���
���Collin, I���m asking you to stop playing games.���
He kissed her and she couldn���t resist. He was on top of her kissing her hard, she was lost in the moment and grabbed his hair and kissed him back. She moved her head to the side and breathed several deep breaths.
���Collin, please stop, please.���
���Beg,��� he said stopping only briefly to speak and continued kissing her neck and moving up towards her lips.
���Please stop, please��� she begged.
He grunted ���That���s four.��� Collin stood up and went to walk out the door.
She was so pissed she threw a water bottle at him and hit him in the backside.
He stopped and turned around, he looked angry, ���Did you just throw that at me?���
���Well, who the hell else would you ass! I���m so pissed at you, your lucky I didn���t crack you in the head. Collin you���re an asshole, you walk into my house, break into my bathroom while I am taking a bath, talk to me like I am some pig, and try to intimidate me. You scared me!���
He stood and looked at her, she could tell he was staring at her and she wiped her eyes and looked up at him, ���You should leave!���
Collin stood looking at her with guilt in his eyes he placed his hand just below his heart and looked confused. He let out a deep breath and then turned, walked out the door and shut it behind him. She lay on the couch and cried herself to sleep.
* * *
When she woke it was five in the morning, she looked at her phone and there was a message from Lucas.
���We need to talk, call me.���
She knew he would be awake in 30 minutes and driving to work, she was going to go for a run and then call him back. She walked outside with Leia and saw Collin asleep in the lounge chair. Leia jumped up on him and licked his face, he woke up and looked at her, and he closed his eyes and held his head in his hands.
���Hung over?��� she asked with one eyebrow raised.
���Yeah,��� he whispered.
���Good,��� she said and took off running.
They had run for an hour before they returned home. She ran harder than she had in a long time, she didn���t leave the sand and what was normally a hard run was getting easier, she was pleased with herself.
She walked past him and into the house, he was pouting. She walked into the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water and two Tylenol and walked out and gave it to him, he mumbled ���Thank you.���
She sat on the couch and called Luke.
���Hey, it���s Tessa you called?��� she said. ���Well, I do have to say that I was not impressed with the Facebook pictures of our graduation and you hanging on Jessie and me with a big ginormous X over my face. Nor was I impressed with the pictures of you kissing her neck at said graduation���no, I am absolutely not jealous, I do, however, feel bad for Miguel��� leaving me out of this��� how could you do that to him? Is that why they were so hard on you in Jersey is that why you came home and I stayed and helped you until Audrianna and your sisters came?... I am over that. I get the relationship ending and even you moving on, but he was your friend Lucas!... I don���t think that���s any of your concern��� I saw you wrote my replacement��� Yep, I have been hanging out with him���Well, that���s nice of Jessie to report to you��� That is none of your business Lucas! Listen, I���m not doing this again, we have ended our relationship. If I can get over what you did while we were together and still want you to be happy, you should have no hard feelings towards me��� Yes, you did and I forgive you��� No Lucas, not in a million years…. I do care about you, we spent our entire youth together, but that means this, I want you to be happy, I ask that you figure out how to want that for me��� Sure Lucas go ahead and mock my beliefs, I am alright with that��� I have to go Luca��� no, he���s not laying next to me, and again none of your business��� Lucas you don���t want the answer to that. I have to go, drive safe. Goodbye.���
She hung up threw the phone down and went into the bathroom and took a shower and brushed her teeth.
She grabbed her robe and put it on and walked into the kitchen.
Collin stood with his arms crossed and head hung low, ���I���m sorry I behaved so badly.���
���I accept your apology.���
Tessa walked to the stove and heated some water and got out two cups and placed tea bags in each.
���What can I say or do Tessa, to make you look at me again?��� he asked.
Sil
ly man she thought I enjoy looking at you.
She smiled and rubbed his back as she walked by ���Collin, it���s not up to me, it will be what it is right?���
���I guess,��� he said confused.
���I just think if we are going to keep hanging out we should make a pact, honesty, trust, and sobriety,��� she laughed.
���I feel horrible about last night and Sunday night. I���m sorry Tessa,��� he spoke with a raw sincerity she had not heard before.
���Well, Sunday I was being honest and I think I freaked you out. I certainly wasn���t acting on the outside the way I feel inside. However, last night you were an insatiable ass,��� she laughed.
���I���m sorry Tessa,��� he said and looked broken.
She couldn���t stand seeing him so down. She hugged him tight for a long time.
The tea kettle whistled and she let go, she saw is eyes squint in pain. ���Head hurts huh?���
���Just a little, I don���t drink that much normally,��� he was in pain
She brought the tea to the table and they sat and drank quietly. She got up and made some bagels and hard boiled eggs. He ate and watched her. He wasn���t sure what she was thinking, he couldn���t read her like he could most people. She ran a bath and told him to get in and soak; he walked into the bathroom and did as he was told. She returned with the shorts and hoody that he had made her wear the night he put her in the cold shower and placed them on the counter, she walked out and shut the door behind her. He came out bathed and dressed. She took his hand and led him upstairs to her bedroom where they lay in bed and both fell asleep.
He woke and she wasn���t there. He walked downstairs and she sat on the couch playing with her computer. He sat next to her and grabbed her hand and rubbed it with his other hand. He kissed it and held it against his chest.
She smiled at him and leaned into his chest. She was looking at pictures from Molly���s shower and renaming each file. He watched and learned who the people were in her life. There still wasn���t any conversation just them and their unspoken connection.
She came across the pictures of her parents. ���How���s your Mom Collin?���
���A mess, she���s angry and drying up and not doing it very gracefully. She tried to sign herself out and I had to promise to come back Wednesday in order to get her to stay,��� he said very sadly.
���I���m sorry Collin, that must be incredibly hard,��� she said and wrapped his arms more tightly around her. She wanted to tell him about Lucas���s mother and how she had been sober now for four years. But she didn���t want to bring him up.
He felt better just being there with her. He never felt it was his responsibility to help his mother get well. She had put him through a living hell for the first 16 years of his life and she was his mother, someone who was supposed to ease his pain. He would never treat his children like that nor would he ever let anyone else. Wow, he thought, that was the very first time I had ever even considered having children. Tessa he thought, what are you doing to me?
She got ready to go to the church, he watched her primp. She looked beautiful and happy.
���What are you going to do when I���m gone?��� she asked.
���I have some colleagues coming over for a work dinner,��� he said, ���We have a big trip coming up in two weeks and need to get all the wrinkles ironed out.���
���Sounds like a lot of fun,��� she smiled.
���It���s one of the few things I know I���m good at Tessa, I love my work.���
���I wish I could watch you in action,��� she smiled.
���I wish I could go with you tonight and see what it is that makes you so happy, and meet your friends,��� he said with an apologetic tone.
���So when are you going to return from your visit with your mom?���
���Thursday about three in the afternoon, that way I can attend three of her counseling sessions,��� he looked at her hand in his.
She watched as he rubbed her hand gently as it rested over his other hand.
���Do you think Thursday night I can take you on a date,��� she whispered.
���Tessa, are you asking me out?��� he whispered back.
���Are you accepting my request?��� she giggled.
���Will you beg me?���
She raised her eyebrow and looked at him. ���I wouldn���t push it.���
���Yes Tessa I���d love you to take me on a date��� he reached over and hugged her.
���You���re going to love it, how do you feel about hanging out with one hundred and fifty little people?���
���I���m going to regret accepting aren���t I,��� he smirked.
Tessa smiled ���If you do, I will buy you dinner afterward, maybe you can meet my new friends,��� she said jokingly. ���By the way, we are going to have dinner and conversation Wednesday night, again. You alright with that?���
���Yes Tessa. I know I shouldn���t feel like this, logically it doesn���t make sense������ he stopped.
Tessa looked at him and swallowed hard, ���I wasn���t trying to upset you.���
Collin looked up at her and put his hand on her face and very gently rubbed her cheek. She closed her eyes and pushed into it.
���You don���t have to come. I shouldn���t expect you to,��� she said with her eyes still closed.
���God you���re beautiful,��� he whispered.
Tessa opened her eyes and looked into his.
He pulled her head to his chest and she felt his heart beat against her face.
���I want to come with you, Thursday. More than I can even begin to wrap my head around. You need to get ready for church,��� he kissed her head and released her.
* * *
The night was full of singing and laughing, the musical director had not returned yet, she would more than likely be back tomorrow. She sang and danced with the little kids teaching them tonight���s song and the movements that went with them, they were all very affectionate and she loved seeing their smiling joy- filled faces. The older group was really into the song ���What do I know of Holy��� a song from Addison Road. They actually sang it with her.
There was a girl whose name was Michelle when she sang it sent chills up her spine, this was a kid who you could look at and know immediately that she was without. She was about 12 and had clothes that didn���t quite fit right and she walked home with her two younger siblings every night. They lived right around the corner in an apartment building; Tessa knew because she followed them one night, she was worried they would not get home alright. Her little sister���s looked about the same, and they too were musically blessed. All three looked hungry. Tessa smiled when she thought of the boy she gave her snack to when she attended there as a child. Tonight she would stop and grab a couple bags of groceries and set them on their porch.
Before she left she sent a text to Collin telling him, she was going to stop at the store before returning home and asked if he needed anything.
- This damn meeting to end, and you to be home
Tessa dropped the groceries and left. She returned home and changed. She let Leia out and she did her business and Tessa cleaned it up. She looked over and three women that she didn���t know and four men including Collin and Tomas sat on the deck. Collin sat at the front of the table and was clearly in control. Looking hot Mr. Abraham she thought. She was pulling weeds from her flower beds when she received a text
- you are very distracting out there in that dress and bent over those flowers
- probably woul
d distract you more if I told you I was wearing nothing under it
- would you please go inside so I can pay attention
- hmm, nope!
She looked over and smiled at him; he shook his head yes and smiled back.
���Dr. Abraham,��� one of the men said and Collin continued watching Tessa.
She turned her back towards him and slowly bent over the flowers again, his mouth dropped and he was now glaring at her. She turned around and winked.
���Dr. Abraham.��� one of the women said loudly.
He turned and looked at her.
���Are we finished for the night?��� she asked smiling.
���Just about��� he replied and continued where he had left off ���So we are all in agreement as to what our roles are?��� They all said yes. ���I���ll email you the notes from the meeting tomorrow then.���
They all got up and left. He didn���t even walk them out. He waited until they all left and loosened his tie and walked to her.
���Good evening Tessa,��� he said. ���You look beautiful.���
She smiled and blushed ���How was your meeting?���
���It was very productive until well about fifteen minutes ago,��� he smiled. ���You confuse the hell out of me.���
���Why?���
���Here I am busting my balls to make sure we���re all PG based on what you said. Then you drop the no panties thing on me.���
Tessa sat back and looked down, ���Sorry. I know I shouldn���t������
���Heart beautiful. You said it was one and the same with God?���
���Well yeah, but I���m pretty sure���.���
���I shouldn���t have said anything, please forget I did,��� he kissed her neck again this time leaving his mouth open as he rubbed up and down. ���Stop over thinking this. It pushes me away too, and I don���t want it to anymore.���
Tessa built a fire in the fire pit and pushed him into the lounge chair. She went inside and put on a sweatshirt and pair of shorts, she grabbed him a sweatshirt and took a couple glasses of water and went outside. His eyes sparkled and danced as he looked her up and down. Her eyebrow arched and he starred in her eyes and smirked. She sat with her back against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her hair to the side and kissed her neck.
