by Mj Fields
Brody did as he asked out of sheer panic that he was going to lose her. He watched as Mark checked her heart rate and breathing. He grabbed his bag and set up a saline drip and put an IV in her arm.
���Did you call Lila?��� He asked looking at Brody.
���No, I didn���t. I haven���t decided if I���m going to let you fucking live or not,��� Brody sneered at him.
Mark smiled and grabbed his phone, ���Lila, I know you���re busy but there is a very angry rock star here, threatening my life…could you come back home? Thanks.���
Emma started to wake up, and Brody grabbed her hand, ���Brody, why are you here?��� She asked weakly.
He didn���t answer. He just looked at her and kissed her hand. He heard Lila and Mark walking towards the room.
���Brody this is Mark Slain. Mark, this is Brody Hines.���
���Lila what the fuck is going on?��� Brody growled at her.
���Emma���s sick, and Mark���s her doctor,��� Lila said sitting on the bed next to Emma, ���Emma you���ve had an exciting morning, how are you feeling?���
���Like hell,��� Emma smiled, ���What ti������
���It’s ten thirty in the morning,��� Brody answered, and Emma started to laugh.
���I need my phone I need to call������ Emma started to say as she was sitting up with Lila���s help.
���London���s at school, your parents are fine, here���s your phone,��� Brody said in a detached tone.
���I missed a message from Mom,��� Emma whispered and looked at it as Lila looked over her shoulder.
���Where were you last night Brody?��� Lila laughed.
���That���s none of your concern,��� he answered as he scowled at her.
���Brody, damn it!��� Emma yelled and started to cry.
���We���re going to give you two a moment. Lila, let me get you breakfast,��� Mark said taking her hand and walking out the door.
���Emma…you need to tell me what���s going on,��� Brody said firmly.
���How could you do this? I told you that we were done. Tell me why you would do this to her?��� she said and handed him the phone.
Brody looked at the picture and narrowed his eyes, ���I went to see you, and London was upset, I read to her and waited to feel the little shake, and I was going to leave but she was so upset Em,��� Brody couldn���t control it anymore, ���look at me Em, you���re fucking me up,��� he said and cried with his head in his hands.
���I���m so tired Brody, so seriously tired. I don���t want to talk about this anymore, but you���re giving me no choice. So listen because I won���t say it again. I have breast cancer. I found out the Monday after you left. You hadn���t returned my text and I honestly don���t have it in me to make things right for anyone else but me and London. I thought I���d lost you. I had to move, I started a new job, and I was told I had cancer. It���s a lot Brody, and I can���t do it anymore. I need to attack this and get better. I���ve had my breast cut open, sewn shut and am now going through an extremely intense course of radiation,��� Emma closed her eyes to think and fell asleep.
Brody caught her before her head hit the pillow and pulled her into him and laid down with her head on his chest as he cried.
Mark walked in the door at three o���clock, ���Emma, you need to be at the hospital in an hour for your treatment,��� he said, ���I can take you, or you can meet me there.���
Emma sat up and looked at Brody sadly, ���Give me a minute, thank you Mark. I have to get ready.���
���I���ll take you, and I���ll help you,��� Brody said and stood up.
���I don���t want you to. Didn���t I just tell you I couldn���t do this?��� Emma said covering herself.
���No, Em you fell asleep,��� he said pulling her up and grabbing her clothes.
���I don���t want you to see me,��� she snapped.
���Em I���ve seen all of you. Stop. I���m not going anywhere,��� Brody said, pulling her shirt over her head.
���No, you haven���t seen the new and improved me,��� she sneered at him.
���Yes Em, your towel dropped, and I saw you, you���re beautiful. Feet in please,��� he said kneeling down holding her yoga pants.
���Why are you here?��� She yelled.
���I love you Em, I���m here because I love you. Can you walk, or shall I carry you?��� Brody asked standing in front of her.
���I can walk,��� Emma slowly walked into the living room, and Mark removed her IV, ���Mark, I���ll take that ride please.���
���No, you���re riding with me Emma, which hospital?��� Brody asked Mark.
���No, damn it!��� Emma yelled.
Brody swooped her up and walked out the door, ���Emma shh,��� he said and kissed her.
Mark and Lila followed.
* * *
While Emma received her treatment Brody stood outside the room starring at the floor. ���Brody are you alright?��� Lila asked.
���Lila I don���t want to talk to you right now, I���m very pissed that she���s gone through all this and you couldn���t even tell me!��� He snapped.
���Well, be pissed then ��� you asshole!��� Lila snapped.
���I will,��� he glared at her.
Emma was being wheeled out, and she looked up at Brody and scowled. He looked at her and shook his head and followed her out. His car was waiting, and he grabbed her arm and helped her up and into the car. He looked back and saw Lila and Mark standing behind him, ���Get your ass in here, Lila,��� he snapped.
���Fine!��� Lila sneered at him, ���Mark, will we see you later?���
���Of course,��� Mark said and hugged her, ���Hines, you need to be nice to her.���
���You’re lucky you���re breathing Doc,��� Brody snapped.
Mark looked at Emma and smiled, ���You need to rest, one more day okay, and this is done. I���ll be over in a few hours.���
���Thank you so much Mark, for everything,��� Emma smiled politely.
���Anything for my favorite patient,��� he said and winked.
���You’re pushing it, asshole,��� Brody said under his breath.
Mark laughed as he shut the door.
���Brody,��� Emma said.
���I���m right here Em,��� he said and grabbed her hand lovingly.
���I need you to let this be, I can���t do this with you anymore,��� Emma said sadly.
���Well let me think about that,��� he said, and sat back still holding her hand, ���Nope…sorry Emma. But that���s not going to happen.���
Emma began to cry, and he pulled her into his arms and held her. ���Lila I���ll be staying at your place until she���s better, can you deal with that?���
Lila shot him a dirty look, and he returned it.
���She was following my wishes, be nice to her,��� Emma snapped.
���Fine, sorry Lila,��� he managed to say.
* * *
Emma and Brody laid in bed, she slept as he held her. Her phone rang, and he answered it.
���Good afternoon, London,��� he said with a smile in his voice, ���I���m here, no she isn���t happy with me, but she���ll get over it, no she isn���
��t mad at you she saves all her anger for me, isn���t that sweet?��� He said and laughed.
He felt Emma stir and grabbed her cup of water as he held the phone with his shoulder against his ear.
���Drink, Em,��� he whispered, and she did as he asked, ���She���s awake would you like to talk to her? Okay I���ll talk to you soon, I love you too,��� Brody handed Emma the phone and looked away.
���Hi baby girl… I���m feeling great better every day���Yes, tomorrow night I hope to be home with you…I miss you very much���okay���I���ll pick you up after piano���I love you more���yes we do…you���ve been having nightmares? Okay you don���t have to tell me just sleep good tonight please���no I don���t think that���s a good idea, maybe Grandma could sleep with you���Okay I love you, see ya soon,��� Emma hung up the phone and drew her knees to her chest and cried.
Brody pulled her into his chest and wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head.
���Don���t,��� Emma snapped.
���Are you feeling up to having a chat Emma?��� Brody asked in a deep serious tone.
���No, I would like for you to leave, how could you do that to her? She thinks you’re some sort of damn hero because she didn���t have a nightmare last night, she wanted you to come stay again. Do you know what you���ve done?��� Emma yelled, ���Do you?���
���Emma I������ Brody began to explain.
���And you tell her you love her, what the hell are you thinking? She isn���t a toy Brody. She���s a little girl; she doesn���t need you to confuse her. She can���t handle it, I can���t handle it, and I���m an adult!��� Emma yelled weakly.
���Are you finished Emma? Are you going to give me a chance to speak?��� Brody snapped, ���When I showed up at your place last night I expected to find you there, she ran from the car and jumped in my arms, which by the way, when I left here was just fine with you! Emma, she was crying, shaking, scared, and very worried about you. She told me you were sick Emma, she tried to tell me what was going on, and your parents cut her off, she got angry,��� Brody laughed, ���She even said shit���twice.���
���She what?��� Emma tried not to smile, but he sensed the amusement in her voice.
���You father started to say you didn���t need my shit right now, and your mother stopped him, London just filled in the blank������ Brody said with a smile in his voice.
���Twice?��� she asked.
���Yep, twice. Well then she was angry, you know the way you get with me, and she cried and I couldn���t leave her. My intention was to wait until she did that little shake thing you told me about when she falls asleep, but I laid there and watched her sleep and she looked so peaceful and well, I screwed up and fell asleep. It wasn���t to be hurtful to either of you. I���m sorry,��� Brody said and hugged her a little tighter.
Emma didn���t reply. She couldn���t.
���So then I came here, and well…you know the rest. Emma, please talk to me, please,��� Brody said urgently.
���You didn���t say it back, or text back and I won���t let myself get in a situation like that, ever again. I���m not angry Brody, I just need you to leave us alone, let us get our lives to the point where they resemble normal. London will always be mine, not for a few months or ten years, forever. I need to be the best me I can be and I knew Troy and I couldn���t be together anymore or I would lose myself and then London would suffer. And Brody, we were together for fifteen years, but I did it. And I know it���s better for her, even though right now she���s scared and having bad dreams,��� Emma said trying not to cry, ���But you and I Brody, can���t happen. I love her too much to let her be broken again.���
���That Saturday morning when we talked, and I pulled away from you, well…I was scared. I shared more with you in that hour than I���ve ever shared with anyone in my life. I���d just found out about my mother and found my sister. Emma, it overwhelmed me. And yes…I was scared. But I knew I needed to figure it out so that I could return strong for you, and your daughter. I���m sorry that hurt you, and I���m so sorry that my break down or break through as I believed it was, happened when you got sick Em. But you should have told me. I would have never let you go through this alone Em,��� he said stroking her hair.
���Brody that���s my point, you feel obligated, and you aren���t. I don���t want that for you. I want you to find someone to love and have babies with, and not have to worry about breast cancer or ex- husbands who will always be there. I love������ Emma stopped.
���You love me enough to let me go, that���s what you were going to say Emma. Well that���s very noble of you ��� however, I love you more because I will never leave you; you���re mine forever. When you allow yourself to believe that and stop being so damn selfless you���ll get it. And I���ll be sitting right here. Now take a drink and go to sleep, you need to rest,��� Brody demanded and handed her water.
Emma took a drink, ���It���s not up to you,��� she said and handed him back the water and sat up.
���Okay, turn and look at me Emma,��� he said helping her, ���Tell me you���re pissed at me, tell me you hate me or blame me, get it out of your system.���
���I was angry Brody, very angry at myself just as much as I was at you. But I stopped being angry. None of this is your fault it���s a wake- up call,��� Emma said looking in his eyes.
���I���ll never be able to tell you or even put into words how sorry I am Em, but you know it here,��� he said and touched her chest.
Emma immediately started crying, ���Don���t, don���t touch me not there, not ever!���
���Emma don���t do that, don���t think for a minute that changes how I feel here,��� he said and put her hand to his heart.
Emma closed her eyes and let the tears fall and he pulled her onto his lap and cradled her. ���You need to sleep, I know that. But do me one last favor,��� he said and pulled her chin up, so she was looking at him. He wiped her tears and kissed her gently, ���Tell me that you don���t love me and tell me you don���t feel the same way I do about you,��� Emma didn���t respond. And he kissed her again. ���Sleep now, Emma.���
Brody woke up as Emma was getting out of bed, ���Do you need something Emma?��� he said as he jumped up.
���I need a shower,��� Emma said softly.
���Okay how about a bath? I���ll draw you one, sit please I���ll be back in a minute,��� Brody said and kissed her.
He ran a bath and added bubbles and lit the candles.
���Alright where are your night clothes?��� he asked.
���In the top drawer, but I can get them Brody,��� Emma pouted.
He smiled at her, ���No I want to. Emma is this right?��� he asked holding up a t- shirt and cotton pajama bottoms.
Emma blushed, ���Yes.���
Brody laughed, ���Alright then.���
���What���s so funny?��� Emma scowled.
���You should be wrapped in satin bows Emma, not cotton,��� he smiled and tried not to laugh.
She rolled her eyes at him, and he walked into the bathroom and went to help her out of her shirt and she slapped his hand. Brody gasped and looked at her with a shocked expression.
���Did you just strike me?��� He asked.
���Yes!��� She snapped.
���You won���t le
t me help you?��� He asked confused.
���No, I won���t,��� Emma responded, ���You should leave.���
���You keep saying that Emma, yet you know I���m not going anywhere,��� Brody said and hugged her.
���I don���t want you to see, Brody,��� Emma said shyly.
���Okay for now, but just your breasts right?��� Brody asked.
���Brody I���m not feeling all that hot lately. I don���t think it���s a good idea,��� Emma said looking at the ground.
���Princess, I didn���t bring the bows with me,��� he smiled, ���I just want to help you get in the bath, I don���t want you to fall or get hurt,��� he said, while pulling her pants down and she closed her eyes. He looked up at her, ���Is this alright, Emma?��� she nodded her head yes and let out a deep breath. ���Emma.���
���Brody, I can���t,��� Emma said with a shallow breath.
���I know, but the fact that you want to is so hot Emma,��� Brody said and hugged her. ���I���m going to turn around, and you can slip into the tub, carefully,��� he whispered in her ear.
���Brody,��� she stopped and shook her head hoping to snap out of this mood, ���Thank you.���
���Emma I love you, it���s a privilege to be here,��� Brody said and turned around.
���Brody damn you,��� she moaned.
���Get in that bath Emma,��� he said through clenched teeth.
He heard the water move, ���Okay I���m in, could you grab me a wash cloth, please.���
Brody grabbed two wash cloths and handed her one as he put the other in the water, ���What���re you doing?���
���I���m going to help you.���
���No, you���re not,��� she laughed. He looked at her and smiled, ���What?���
���You laughed Emma, I haven���t heard you laugh in weeks,��� he smiled and looked away. ���First I���m going to wash your feet and make my way up to your hair, if it makes you uncomfortable just tell me to stop, I���m going to let you wash your breasts. Just lean back and relax, Em.���
