by Sotia Lazu
She was still crying, twisting his insides into knots every time she drew a shuddering breath to let out another sob. It had to be something bad. “Is it your mom? Edmund? You can tell me. We’ll figure it out.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
If he hadn’t been studying her so intently, trying to gauge what was wrong, he would have missed it. “Come again, pet?”
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I screwed up.” She pulled back and made a visible effort to compose herself. “I was scared.”
He tightened his grip on her arms—it felt like his grip on sanity. Was he awake? Was she really there, telling him what he’d dreamed of hearing?
“Did you hear me? I’m sorry. Please say it’s not too late.” She hung her head, to look up at him through wet, lowered eyelashes. “It’s not, is it?”
Ric crushed her against him and slanted his lips over hers. He couldn’t believe what he’d heard, but refused to give it a second thought. Lexi wanted another chance. She wanted him.
Words failed him. No matter how he tried, the right sentences wouldn’t form on his lips, to let her know he’d have waited forever if he had to. So he kissed her, pouring all his love, his need, his hope into the kiss they shared. He devoured her lips and tasted her tongue with all the fervor of feelings he could express no other way at that moment.
When he pulled back from the kiss, his head had cleared. “It’s not. Never too late for you to come to me.”
“Oh, thank God.” She buried her face into his chest and slipped her arms under his, to wrap them around his waist. “Oh, thank God,” she said again, squeezing him. “I was so worried. I was sure I screwed up. That you’d hate me forever. And then Edmund said I should come over here and—”
“You told Edmund about us?” It was the last thing he’d expected to hear. If she’d told Pedelty, then that was it. She wanted to be with him. But what if the old man hated the idea? “What did he say? Do I still have a job?” He tried to make light of the situation, but he’d hate to lose the trust and friendship of the man who’d saved him from himself.
“I didn’t tell him.” She took a deep breath and blurted out everything in one long hurried sentence. “I think Chad did, and then I was asking the Aztec guy for a sign and wasn’t getting one, so I got home, and there was this CD on my bed, and Edmund hadn’t watched it, but he came in after I saw what was on it, and I was shocked, and he didn’t yell but said I should come here. And I’m here, and I’m so sorry for everything.”
She sniffled and turned her face up to him for another kiss, the matter settled, as far as she was concerned.
Ric wanted to ask her a million more questions, but had to start somewhere. “A CD?”
“Can we sit down for this?”
He disentangled his body from hers, took her by the hand, and led her to the sofa. “You sit. I’ll fetch us something to drink.”
“Do you have diet soda?”
He chuckled at how even in her current state—distraught, puffy eyed, and thoroughly kissed—she was still the Lexi he knew and loved. “I don’t do poofy drinks in here as a rule, but stop by more often, and I’ll get you a fridge-full of the stuff. For now, you’ll have to make do with water.”
By the time he returned with two large glasses of water, she was curled up into a little ball at one end of the couch. They had their drinks, and Ric sat on the opposite end and gathered her close. “Want to tell me about it, or do I have to shag it out of you?”
She threw him a cheeky grin, despite still sniffling a bit. “I’m not sure how forthcoming I’d be with the information, following a proper shag.” The last was said in a Pedelty-like manner, complete with the wiping of nonexistent glasses.
“That imitation killed any chance you had for one.” Truth be told, he had no intention of making love to her at the moment. He was too interested in finding out what had changed her mind about the two of them. Maybe it would clue him in on how long this resolution of hers would last. He wanted her to feel relaxed and comfortable enough to open up, since this was the first time he’d seen her the mood to share anything not involving bodily fluids.
*
“Oh, okay.” She heaved an exaggerated sigh. “What do you wanna know?” She glided forward on her seat and rested her head in the crook of his shoulder, not wanting to face him while she talked about stuff that made her uncomfortable.
“Everything, but start with who the fuck Chad is.”
“He’s the security guard who’s been on almost every night lately?” She phrased it as a question.
“Right. That overgrown arse of an army puppet.” Ric nodded, fury blazing in his eyes. “What did he tell Pedelty?”
“He saw us. He said he’d talk unless I was… friendly. I thought it was an empty threat and brushed him off, but he gave Edmund a disc with—” She motioned her index finger from her to him and back, still unable to look at him. “You know… on the conference-room table. Edmund could have seen us have sex.” She covered her face with her hands.
“But he didn’t?”
She shook her head and heard him let out a whoosh of air. He kissed the top of her head. “Go on.”
“He knew what was in it, ’cause he said he didn’t condom, er… condone the place we chose, but he’s cool with us together and all, as long as it’s not just something casual.” She waited for his response, her gaze trained to the glasses on the table in front of her.
“And is it or isn’t it?”
She didn’t blame him for wanting to hear the words. She’d been giving him mixed signals for a while. “I thought it was. I tried hard for it to be. I mean, love? Pfft.” She was no longer talking to him, so much as thinking aloud. “Life isn’t a fairy tale. It’s mean, and you get hurt. When you said you loved me, it felt like a bucket of ice down my spine.” His body went tense against her. “Not because it was you. That’s not what I mean. Shit. I’m not good with words.” She tried to pull away, but he clutched her tight.
“Tell me what you mean, then. I won’t say a thing till you shape it all into what you really want to say. We’ve done this with me doing the talking. Remember?”
“Okay. What I wanted to say was that I—” She cleared her throat. “That nobody loves me. Well, except for my family. Though not my dad. But Mom and Edmund do. And my friends.” She was digressing. “The thing is, I’m not the girl men fall in love with. I’m stubborn, and I’m bitchy, and I’m whiny and weird, and I don’t believe in love. When you said what you said, it was like I’d either been wrong for a long while, or you were lying. I didn’t want either to be true. Make more sense now?”
“It does. Your dad and that other wanker have messed with your head, but it’s because you’re stubborn and bitchy and whiny and weird that I’m in love with you.” There were no maybes this time.
Her heart lurched in her chest, and her stomach felt funny but in a good way. “You like them damaged, huh?”
“I like you.” His voice was heavy with unexpressed emotion. “What made you change your mind?”
“Angie.”
*
Ric wanted to press her for more, but she might clam up, so he waited. When she spoke again, her voice was so hushed, he didn’t catch her words. “What was that, kitten?”
“My best friend. She cast a spell.” He heard her this time, though just barely. It sounded barmy, so he waited for her to elaborate.
“She made a wish for me, to a god called something-Billy. No, wait. Xochipilli.”
“What was the wish?”
“For me to find my soul mate. And he sent me you. We’re meant to be together. You were right all along.” She sniffled again. “I was so stupid. I should have seen you meant what you said. It was there, in your touch. In your kisses.” She shifted in his arms and leaned upward, but Ric wasn’t going to oblige her.
“A spell? Your friend cast a spell to send me your way? Are you pulling my leg?”
“No, it’s true. She and her girlfriend are real-life w
itches. I swear. I didn’t believe it either, till they floated a penc—”
“I don’t give a flying fuck if they’re Magica De Spell and Witch Hazel. You found it easier to believe your friends are witches and that a spell brought us together, than that I love you.”
“I didn’t realize you could be telling the truth. I was afraid you were just trying to get to something. I couldn’t get hurt again. Please forgive me, Ric. I didn’t think—”
“Oh, but you did think. That’s your bloody problem—you think too much. Feel, Lexi.”
“I am feeling now. I’m feeling that you love me, and I need you in my life.”
She tried to get closer, but he held her at arm’s length so he had a clear view of her face. “So what do you want now?”
“I want us to be together.”
“Why?”
“’Cause it’s how it’s supposed to be. I told you, Angie said—”
“Wrong answer.” He pushed her away softly and got up from the couch. Head down, he walked to the door and opened it.
“How can it be the wrong answer? You said I should be with you. Isn’t that what you want?” She glared. “Or was it just a game? Wanted to see if you could get the boss’s daughter to fall for your stupid British charms?”
He could tell the exact moment she reverted to her guarded, hostile self, but he had no fight left in him. Only pain and sorrow. “But you didn’t.”
“Huh? Didn’t what?”
“Didn’t fall for me. See, you could’ve said you want to be with me because you want me. Hell, because you may be returning my feelings. But you didn’t. ’Cause you’re not.”
“But Angie said—”
“I don’t fucking care.” He slammed his open palm on the doorframe hard enough to hurt. “I want you. I choose my life, and I chose to let myself love you, knowing how much it could hurt. I waited, and I hoped, but I chose to stick around and to let you walk all over me. I can accept that you don’t feel the same way, but I won’t let my life be dictated by wishes and spells. There’s nothing I want more than to be with you, but I can’t do it. Not if there’s a chance of you waking up to a new spell a year from now, and deciding your fate is in bloody Tibet. Without me.” He pushed the door open even wider. “Now please get out, while I’m still in control of myself.”
Chapter Twenty-Six
There was nothing for Lexi to do but respect Ric’s wishes. At this point, saying she returned his feelings would seem forced or fake, never mind not entirely honest. She cared for him, but she still needed time to come to terms with everything.
She used the backs of her hands to dry her eyes, and mumbled she was sorry one last time, before brushing past him and out of the apartment.
The door slid closed behind her, but it might as well have been slammed shut. Lexi turned and ran her fingers down the wooden surface. “I don’t know if I love you yet, but I think I can,” she whispered. “So I’ll give both of us the chance to find out if it’s true. Whatever it takes.”
She’d get her man—kicking and screaming, if she had to. And no, she wasn’t above groveling.
She got in her car and gripped the wheel. Focusing on regulating her breath, she tried to clear her mind. Step one was no more tears. She was never a crier, but this whole situation had pushed her to her limits.
Now about step two…
Going home meant facing her mother, who was nothing like her discreet husband when it came to Lexi’s private life. Returning to Angie and Sarah’s wasn’t Lexi’s favorite option either; she still didn’t know how to handle the shitload of information they dumped on her. She had half a mind to keep driving around in circles until she ran out of gas or it got late enough for her mom to go to bed, when something dawned on her. She’d spend the night at Pedelty Electronics. Edmund’s office would be locked, but her chair wasn’t all that uncomfortable.
When Lexi reached the company’s entrance, a new security guard stood behind the reception desk. Refraining from doing a happy dance for being Chad-free, she approached the man. “Hello,” she said. “I’m—”
“I know who you are, Ms. Adams.” His smile was friendly. “Anything I can do for you?”
She liked him already. “No, but thank you”—she looked at his name-tag, embarrassed she didn’t know his name—“Mr. Weald. I’m fine. I just have some stuff to do, and I don’t know how long I’ll be.”
“No worries. Just call me if there’s anything you need. Until then, have a nice evening.” The man got extra brownie points for discretion.
Lexi made her way upstairs and to her desk. She’d need a couple of chapters, to get sleepy. She switched on her computer, before even sitting down, she set the alarm on her cell-phone for seven. She’d hurry home for a shower and fresh clothes in the morning, and then get back to the office before Mom had time to grill her.
It didn’t take long for her to settle down and find the last page she was on.
Within a few paragraphs, Xandra faced a dilemma similar to Lexi’s own. A vampire—a creature she’d been brought up to distrust but ended up sleeping with—professed his love. Xandra couldn’t return his feelings. Could she? And then there was the big reveal. A prophecy that foretold wolf and undead would share a path of love and save all worlds. Xandra didn’t believe in fate, though. She wanted to make her own destiny and choose her own path. If it lead her back to Rex, so be it, but no prophecy would force her to make a choice.
The shifter’s reasoning made Lexi appreciate Ric’s reaction. If he were to give her another chance, she had to let him know how she felt about him—and soon. But that meant she first had to know for sure.
She didn’t realize she was drifting off, until she saw herself lying on her back, in the center of an enormous bed.
Her arms are stretched above her head. Her legs apart. Her wrists and ankles chained to the bed. The bonds allow no leeway. She’s spread out. Defenseless.
She’s not worried. Neither is observer-Lexi.
Ric approaches, and both of her tense. He’s naked. He’s magnificent. The look he spares the naked body on the bed is cold. Lexi shudders. This isn’t the Ric she knows. He’s fierce. Uncaring.
She’s wet and wanting.
Ric swaggers toward naked-Lexi. He crawls on the bed. He straddles dream-Lexi’s hips and rubs his erection on her mons. “What should I do with you tonight, hmmm?”
Dream-Lexi lowers her eyes. “Whatever you deem appropriate.”
Cruel fingers pinch a tender nipple. Dream-Lexi arches her back.
“You forgot something, pet. Do you want to be punished?” His voice is full of promise and threat. “Do you like it? Do you, Xandra?” It’s Xandra on the bed. Xandra and Rex.
“No. No, Sir.” It’s a lie. Xandra is as wet as Lexi.
“I think you do, you little slut. And you’re lying, on top of being disobedient and wanton. I know just the treatment for dirty little liars.” He flips Xandra on her stomach, the movement almost too fast to follow.
How do the chains accommodate the move? Right. It’s a dream. A very hot, incredibly vivid, God-please-let-him-take-her-next erotic dream, and nothing more.
A slap lands on Xandra’s ass, and Lexi yelps at the sting. She wriggles under the hand grabbing Xandra’s reddened flesh. It’s beyond weird watching as an outsider and feeling the silken sheets against her bare skin at the same time.
“You know you love it, my little slut. Look how you arch into my hand.” Rex trails the fingers of one hand down Xandra’s spine, and she melts into his touch. As she relaxes, the touch turns into a hold that presses her flat on the mattress. He starts raining slaps with his free hand. One after the other, he delivers the blows on her ass and upper thighs. There’s no specific rhythm or pattern. Each crack of his palm against her flesh pulls out a cry of surprise more than pain.
Her skin glows red, and he smiles. Satisfied. “If you could only see what I see, pet…” Neither Xandra nor Lexi can do anything but moan. Lexi’s skin hums with desire. She we
dges her hand between her legs, but there’s no friction. She’s spectral, but for the Xandra version of her.
Xandra bows her back. Tries to move. Struggles against the chains and his palm that keeps her immobilized. “Please, Rex, fuck me.”
A loud slap lands across the back of Xandra’s thighs. “It’s not Rex. It’s Sir. How hard is that for you to remember? Or isn’t it? Do you remember and ignore my wishes anyway? Is that it?”
She shakes her head. Lexi doesn’t blame her for her inability to formulate words. She shares Xandra’s desperation. Her need.
“Well, either you want me to keep punishing you, or you’re stupid. Which one is it, Shifter?” Rex squeezes her ass. His cool fingers soothe the burn of the slaps, but his grip keeps her uncomfortable. “Are you daft, or are you a wanton harlot, begging for more? Are you my harlot?” His touch changes to a gentle caress. “Are you mine, Xandra?”
The blonde on the bed grits her teeth. Lexi knows without seeing her face. She also knows Xandra doesn’t want to reply. Doesn’t want to give him the satisfaction of saying she’s his.
“Stubborn little thing, aren’t you?” He smirks right at Lexi, not Xandra. Lexi gasps. Even though it’s her dream, she feels like an intruder. “We’ll try another way of breaking you, then,” Rex says.
Xandra tenses with the expectation of more harsh treatment, but Rex leans over her and places cool kisses on the heated skin. He uses his lips and tongue to lavish every inch his hands marked. The pleasure is too much yet not enough. Xandra keeps trying to push back. Trying for more. No sound escapes her lips. She chokes down the whimpers and pleas building in her throat. She already said please. She won’t stroke his ego further.
Or so Lexi thinks.
Letting go of her back, the vampire places both hands on her ass and spreads her. Without warning, he runs his tongue down the valley between her buttocks, down to her puckered second entrance. She flinches, but her restraints and his hands won’t allow her to pull away. “Relax, and you’ll like it. All dirty girls do.” He licks around her hole, his agile tongue massaging the tight ring of muscle.
