Kelly laughed and shook her head, keeping a hand possessively on Noel’s chest, but the energy between them was clearly one of old friends.
“I do remember you now!” Noel turned back to Paige. “Helen’s granddaughter. So you’re here with Adam now?”
“I’m not with Adam, exactly,” Paige said crisply. “I’m looking for him now, though. I’m a little desperate—”
“All right.” He threw a smile Kelly’s way. “I can see some symmetry to that. And desperate for my brother sounds good.”
Paige didn’t know what that meant, but she didn’t have time to ask. “I’ll see you,” she said instead and rushed toward the house.
When Adam stepped back into the path of the flowering bougainvillea vines, Paige was gone. He cursed under his breath and looked across the gathering crowd. He could have sworn he’d just seen her there.
This was going to get crazy here today. But he needed to talk to her. He wanted to at least say a proper good-bye. And give her a proper hug. And, truth be told, he’d love to give her one more thorough kiss. Because even though things hadn’t worked out for them—clearly she didn’t have enough trust in him to fall in love—he at least wanted to let her know he forgave her.
He’d taken a few long walks over the past few evenings—many to the Top of the World—and had thought everything over. He’d realized that she hadn’t known the series of events she’d been sparking when she talked to Ginger and George about him. Her actions were age appropriate, really—a young teen trying to get out of her own trouble, not blaming someone else, just trying to wriggle out of her own problems. He knew she’d meant no malice toward him personally, then or now.
But it was harder to wrap his mind around her choice to not say anything in the last few weeks. How could she have been sleeping with him—presumably growing closer—and not have told him? Did she think he’d explode with the kind of fury his dad would have unleashed? Could she not trust that he wouldn’t? Or did she simply have no plans to get closer and wanted to only stay FRED? Had she thought their sleeping arrangement would end if she said anything? Either way, all paths seemed to lead to the same place: She didn’t trust him. And if she didn’t trust him, she couldn’t love him.
But he wanted to see her today and tell her that he’d loved each day he’d spent with her. He’d loved being with her this summer.
And he might not tell her this part, but he’d loved her.
As he strained to see over everyone’s head, though, and find Paige again, he saw his brother traipsing through the meadow.
It was great to see his little brother again. He’d heard his plane and immediately looked forward to reuniting. Plus, he needed to wrestle him away from everyone at some point to tell him everything about Amanda and losing the seaplane property before he heard details from someone else. Adam had almost done it on the phone earlier, but it felt like information he should share in person, especially the being-a-new-uncle part.
But first Adam had to find Paige. He was starting to feel the clock ticking down on their time here. And he had some things he really needed to say.
The music started up with an instrumental trio, indicating the wedding was just a half hour away. And Paige was leaving right after the ceremony. Adam wandered through the crowd, starting to feel desperate. Finally, a heavy hand landed on his shoulder.
Noel greeted him with his trademark grin. “Hey, bro. I met your lady friend. Our old neighbor, huh? She grew up pretty.”
“Where’d you see her?”
“Meadow. I wanted to touch her hair.”
“Hands off,” Adam said, frowning.
A slow grin spread across Noel’s face. “That sounded serious. Is there something I need to know?”
Adam looked away. He didn’t want to talk to Noel about Paige. It felt too private, too surreal. Talking about summer girls at the boat dock, or summer women they’d seen at the jazz festival was one thing. But talking about Paige was different. Things between them seemed as though they needed to stay between them—their own private circle of two. He’d miss her more than he could imagine, but their summer would always be a private memory for him.
“I need to talk to you about something else, but now is not the time,” Adam said.
“So how did you two rekindle?”
“Noel, seriously.”
“Just tell me.”
“Drop it.”
Noel shrugged good-naturedly as if he had no intention of dropping this whatsoever, then smiled. “Good to see you, man.” He clapped Adam on the shoulder.
Adam smiled back. It was good to see Noel, too. And he owed him this explanation. Maybe he could rush it quickly and then get back to finding Paige. He took a deep breath as he listened to the instrumental trio playing off to the side and tried to figure out how he was going to say this.
“So what’s your news?” Noel said over the lively violin.
Adam looked at the fake-green spray in the charred meadow grasses. He ran his fingers through his hair. He’d just have to blurt it out. He had things he needed to run to.
“I have a daughter.”
Noel’s jaw went slack.
Adam took a perverse satisfaction that he was finally able to stun an expression off his brother’s face. After twenty-nine years.
“A daughter?” Noel’s words came out more as expulsions of air than actual words.
“A daughter, yes. She’s sixteen.”
If Noel could have possibly looked any more shocked, Adam didn’t know how to produce it. His brother’s mind seemed to be whirling a million miles an hour. He might have been doing the math.
“Samantha?” he finally asked.
Adam nodded. “She died. And left Amanda to me. Amanda’s here now. I’ll have to introduce you. She’s great. She looks almost exactly like Mom.”
“Wow.” Noel stared at his hands, then swiveled his gaze out toward the trees. “Before you said her age, I almost thought you were going to say it was your new lady. But this is crazier.”
“And she’s not my new lady. Stop saying that. And I have to sell the seaplane property. I’m sorry for letting everyone down about that, but it had to be done.” There. It felt good to blurt everything out. Adam let out his breath.
When Noel didn’t respond, Adam looked up. Noel was giving him one of his don’t-bullshit-me looks.
“First, if I hear you say those words again, I’m going to beat the hell out of you,” Noel said.
“What words?”
“Anything about letting everyone down. You’re not. And you never have. You’ve been the rock of this family for a long time. Hell, since you were fifteen, I think. And you never let us down. You always saved us, in fact. Did you know Mama Mendez calls you ‘The Rock’? She says it in Spanish, of course—La Piedra—but she says that when she calls me.”
“She calls you?”
“Sometimes.”
“Why?”
“To tell me how you’re doing. I figure she’ll give me the real lowdown.” Noel grinned. “Anyway, no more of that. And don’t worry about the seaplane property. I’ve only been here for twenty minutes and I’ve already heard three rumors about the townspeople starting a Seaproperty Fund for you, so that explains that. I trust you. What’s meant to be will be.”
“You trust me? Just like that?”
“Adam, you’re the most trustworthy person on this island. Everyone knows that. Now on to more important things, like why you said that gorgeous friend of yours is not your new lady. And why she’s desperate to find you.”
“She’s desperate to find me?”
“I think she said desperate. Or maybe she said ‘despondent.’ Not sure.” Noel grinned.
“When did she say that?” Adam’s blood began racing through his veins as he looked over his shoulder.
“About fifteen minutes ago. She went that way. But since we’ve been talking, I saw her walk back over there.” Noel nodded toward the orchard.
“What the hell, Noel? Why d
idn’t you say anything?”
“I just did. I was waiting for her to be alone. I think she is now. You’ve got fifteen minutes before the ceremony, man. Go.” He slapped Adam on the shoulder just as Adam spun away.
Fifteen minutes wasn’t quite enough for the good-bye he’d envisioned.
But it would have to do.
It was long enough for a guy’s heart to break anyway.
CHAPTER 29
“Adam!” Paige let out a breath of relief when she spotted him jogging in her direction, looking around—she hoped, for her.
He looked amazing. He had on a black tuxedo with a crisp white shirt, the collar held around his neck by a soft-blue tie that was the same color as his eyes. The crispness of the shirt came around his neck in an oddly containing way—not how she was normally used to seeing him. But rather than look uncomfortable with the containment, he simply looked gorgeous.
As he turned near the boxwood maze, Paige stepped back to try to wave to him, but she lost her footing in the planter and toppled into a hydrangea bush.
“Oof,” she squealed. She landed sideways in the shrubbery.
She pushed against the leaves, her hands poking through the spindly branches and giving her no leverage, then tried to shift to one side to maybe roll out. But finally she managed to get her feet underneath her and back out, her bottom jutting in the air.
“These things always thwart my getaways, too.” Adam’s voice was suddenly right behind her.
She glanced over her shoulder. He stood, with his hands in his pockets, and watched, amused, as she backed her bottom out.
She finally straightened. “Thanks for the help.”
“I guess I was too busy enjoying the view.”
Her cheeks heated as she dusted herself off.
He was looking her up and down. “You look stunning.”
His eyes had already told her that. She had to glance away.
“It needed a little greenery,” she said, picking a few leaves out of the fluttery sleeve of the dress.
A silence filled the space between them while he shoved his hands in his pockets and seemed to calculate what he wanted to say next. “Paige,” he finally ventured, “I need to say a few things.”
She shook her head. Her heart was pounding. “I have a lot to say, too, Adam. And I think I should go first.”
The music trio led into a livelier tune—designed to encourage people to find their seats now—and they both turned toward it nervously.
“Can we go somewhere else?” she asked. “Quieter, maybe?”
“I’m not sure we can find a quiet corner on this ranch today.”
“Maybe back here?” She grabbed his arm and pulled him back with her about ten feet; then she thought twice about that spot and moved him another ten feet toward the orchard. It was getting quieter and quieter, so she kept tugging at his tuxedo sleeve. Pretty soon they were in the center of the orchard, in the middle of the cameras and camerapeople and wires that had been reconstructed for the documentary. The music slowly rolled into the traditional “Wedding March.” Paige let the familiar notes shatter her a little, wishing she could have had the gift of Adam falling in love with her.
As the “Wedding March” hit its louder notes, the camerapeople looked up at once. “Are they starting?” someone gasped.
Bodies went into frantic motion—cameras were wheeled back, lights were killed, grips jumped up from the ground. Paige and Adam pressed themselves back within the whirlwind, steeling themselves against one of the still-standing apple trees to let everyone by.
When the frenzy dissipated, Paige looked up into Adam’s eyes.
“I don’t want you to miss the wedding,” he said.
“This is more important.” Paige swallowed around the sudden feel of cotton in her mouth. She stared at the spared rows of orchard grass for a few more seconds and inhaled the sweet scent of apples as she gathered up her nerve. “Adam, I wasn’t entirely truthful with you earlier.”
He lifted his eyebrow and stared down at her. “There’s more?”
“Yes. I left another part out.”
He nodded slowly and stared at the ground. “Go on.”
“The part I left out is”—she took another deep breath—“I love you.”
The words came out in a whoosh of air and fear and honesty. They hung there, between them, as Paige watched Adam’s face change from surprise to relief to something that looked more like disbelief.
“You love me?” he asked.
She nodded slowly. She could hardly stand up.
“But how . . . how could you love me?”
Paige frowned. “What do you mean, how could I love you? I could love you because you’re a wonderful person. You take care of everyone on the ranch, even people and animals you’re not responsible for. You are kind and giving and generous. You try to fix everyone’s problems. And for the problems you can’t fix, you find someone who can. You’re sweet. And funny. And you love old movies. And you ride a horse like a Western hero. And you make a mean salsa. And you make me see stars when I come.”
The corner of his mouth quirked up. “I heard that was an important requirement.”
“You make me laugh. You make me happy. You love Amanda and Denny and Bob and Gert. You’re smart and handsome, and you make me stare at your body every minute I’m with you . . .” She looked up into his eyes. “How am I doing?”
“You’re doing okay.” He smiled, but then his eyes took on a solemn hue. “But I don’t hear the word trust in there, Paige.”
“Trust? Of course I trust you.”
“If you trusted me, I don’t understand how you could have kept your secret from me all this time.”
She gulped. Her eyes filled with tears again. He would never be able to forgive her—her worst fears realized. “Adam, I’m so sorry. I feel sick about what I did. I just—”
He held up his hand. “No. I forgive you for that, Paige. I really do. I forgive the young Paige for trying to point out the injustice of what she saw as unfair finger-pointing. I get that. But what I can’t get around is that now—in this time we’ve spent together—you didn’t trust me enough to finally tell me. What did you think I’d do?”
She shook her head. “I don’t know.”
“Did you think I’d rail? Like my dad? At you? You know I’d never—”
“No! Adam, no. I don’t think you’re like your dad at all.”
His shoulders visibly relaxed. “Okay. That’s a start. What, then?”
“I thought you’d hate me, and that you’d end everything we had together. And even though, at first, all we had was FRED, I didn’t want that to end. But then, as we grew closer, I was more and more afraid of what I would lose. I was afraid of losing you. But I finally realized that if I couldn’t be honest, I’d lost you anyway.”
“Afraid of losing me? Paige, you weren’t in danger of losing me. I was falling. Hard.” He stepped closer. “Fast.”
Falling? Adam was falling for her? She couldn’t quite reconcile what he was saying with what she’d always dreamed, and then what she’d feared losing.
“But,” Adam said as he stepped even closer, “if we want to have anything, we have to be able to trust. You have to trust me. It kills me to think you can’t.”
“I do,” she breathed out. “I trust you. But I realize I have to open myself up, also. I had to tell you the truth about being in love with you, too. I was learning to be honest with the details and actions of the past, but still not quite able to open up about how I felt. But now I am. I love you, Adam. And even if you can never forgive me, I want you to know that everything I did was out of love. And fear that you wouldn’t love me back.”
He stared at her for the longest time, as if trying to assemble the pieces in his head, then smiled. “I guess this isn’t like Ted?”
“Who?”
“Ted. The guy with the frame.”
“Todd.”
“Todd. Whatever.”
“No . . . not like
Todd.” She tried to inhale.
But maybe it was. Only she was the one rushing to the declaration. But now she could understand where it came from. It came from a raw opening of your heart, a total throwing of caution to the wind. Total trust. A moment of being completely honest, and putting yourself out there to maybe get hurt, but knowing you needed to say it anyway. It came from feeling the love intensely and wanting to give it back. It felt wonderful. And free. And honest.
She looked up at him and tried to catch her breath again.
“I love you, too, Paige,” he said quietly.
She stared at him and blinked. Did he just say . . . ?
No. He couldn’t have.
“What?”
“I love you.” He quirked a grin and wrapped his arms around her. “Too. Paige.”
She shook her head to force everything to make sense. “But you can’t.”
“I can’t?”
“We were being FRED,” she said.
“We were. And I didn’t want to change the rules on you. But things changed for me.”
Her heart continued its erratic pace as she tried to make sense of what he was saying. “When?” she asked.
“Maybe when I saw your backside stuck in that window.”
She smiled. “But that’s when you first met me.”
“Exactly. I can be slow.”
“But you have . . . summer women. Who you meet all the time.”
Adam frowned. “Where did you hear that?”
“My mom. She’s a pretty reliable source.”
“Paige, you are so far in another league from anyone I’ve met before, I can’t even begin to tell you.”
“When . . . when did you start to feel this way?” Her voice was coming out breathy. She could hardly believe what she was hearing. Adam loved her?
“Things started to feel different the night I got home from the dude overnighter.”
She managed a weak smile. “Right before we got caught by Amanda wrestling with the paint cans in the hangar?”
“Yes, but you’re ruining my Hallmark moment here. When I got home from the dude overnighter, I came across the meadow that night and scratched Denny behind the ears, and I saw the lights on and knew you and Amanda were inside. And it scared the hell out me, Paige, what I was feeling right then. Because it felt like I was coming home. To you. It felt right that it was you.”
Love on Lavender Island (A Lavender Island Novel Book 2) Page 31
