“Would you tell me about her?” Kade blushed. “Your mother, I mean. What she was like.”
“Well, she was kind, for one thing. No matter what she was doing or how she was feeling, she’d come to the aid of anyone in need. And she could bake anything. She could create a recipe with just a taste of something. And she always smelled like lavender and cinnamon.”
“You must miss her.” Karen nodded, trying not to cry.
“What about your parents? What was your childhood like?” Kade hesitated a long while. “If it’s not something you would like to talk about, you don’t have to say anything.”
“No,” he said, glancing away from her. “We’re married. It’ll be a long lifetime if we don’t talk about anything.” He cleared his throat. “My mother left me with my father when I was a boy. Not by choice. She died of pneumonia. I loved her, and I needed her. Her eyes were so sad when she left me. Then it was just Pa and I. He wasn’t a kind man. He was angry and hurt, and he liked to hurt others. I was the only one around.”
“I’m sorry,” Karen whispered, wishing she could take his hand.
“Don’t be. It made me angry for a long time, but it also made me the man I am now. My father and I haven’t spoken in years, but I’ve forgiven him.” He smiled, pouring a cup of steaming coffee. “And you don’t ever have to worry about your child. I may not have gotten more than expected, but I’m glad for it. He’ll be taken care of.”
Karen couldn’t have stopped the tears from falling if she’d wanted to. And here she’d been so afraid of what would happen, how he’d handle fatherhood.
********
As the days turned into weeks, Kade grew nervous. He didn’t know much about children or childbirth, but he did know that Karen could go into labor at any time. After just two weeks, he was sitting on pins and needles. Every time Karen winced when she bent over, or stopped to take a breath, he was sure it was time.
“There’s no need to be so worried, Kade,” she said one day as he cooked breakfast. He’d insisted on it. “When the time comes, you’ll go for Mrs. Zooker. Then there will be a healthy baby, and everything will be alright.”
Kade tried to keep her words in mind, but it was difficult. Whenever he had to go out with his ranch hands, he was so distracted that they’d begun to make fun of him. Herold and Grant thought it was the height of amusement when he rushed home every evening.
But his worries came to fruition when he arrived home after a particularly long day. He’d been thinking about Karen all day, like every day. Of course, this time he’d been thinking about the way she smiled and how she sang as she worked.
Something felt wrong the moment Kade arrived. He wasn’t sure what that something was until he went inside. Karen stood beside the table, clutching the back of a chair, her face scrunched up in pain. He rushed to her side, setting a hand on hers without thinking about it.
“Are you alright?” She nodded though her eyes were squeezed shut. Was she holding her breath? “Do you need me to go for Mrs. Zooker?”
Karen nodded, then clutched his hand, squeezing the life out of it as she said, “Wait. Don’t leave me, please.”
“I have to go and get her, you need help.” Her eyes pleaded with him to stay, and he sighed. “Give me a minute to catch up with Grant or Herold. I’ll send one of them, alright?”
She nodded, her face relaxing as whatever pain had taken her let go. Kade ran out the door, praying silently that the baby could wait until Mrs. Zooker arrived.
********
Karen clutched her stomach, wishing desperately for the pain to stop. Kade still wasn’t back, and she’d moved into the bedroom, where she paced to ease the pressure. She was beginning to wonder if, perhaps, she was dying, not having a child.
When she heard the creak of the front door opening, she let out a sigh of relief. She had started to wonder if Kade had gone after the preacher’s wife himself.
“I’m in the bedroom, Kade,” she called, then sucked in a sharp breath. The pains were coming closer together now. Heavy footsteps clomped through the house, their owner obviously trying to hurry.
“How are you doing?” Kade came swinging around the corner, sweat dripping down his forehead, his breathing heavy.
“Quite well, considering the feeling of being stabbed,” Karen gasped, clutching the bedpost. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying not to be loud. The last thing she wanted was to worry her husband.
“What do I do, what do you need? Can I get you a drink? Something?” Karen chuckled though it made the pain worse.
“No, you can’t do anything. Just be here, that’s all.” He paled, lingering in the doorway.
“Here? The entire time? Is that appropriate? I don’t think so, actually.” His words were a rush, like a wild wind in the fall.
“Kade,” she said, voice quiet and shaky. She looked into his eyes, everything she felt plain on her face. “I’m afraid. I’m sorry, but that’s the truth of it. I always thought I’d have my mother.”
Karen watched her husband realize where he was needed. He moved away from the door standing by her side and holding out a hand. She took it, glad to have someone there. No, not just someone. She was glad to have her husband there.
“Do you remember what you keep telling me, Karen?” She shook her head and swiped at the sweat on her brow. “You’ve told me not to worry. That God is with you, and when this is over, there will be a healthy baby to love.”
“When did you become so wise?” He smiled and kissed the top of her head.
“My wife taught me that.”
********
Kade paced his kitchen, waiting for Mrs. Zooker to come out of the bedroom. She promised to let him know when everything was over, but from the sound of it, that could take a while.
“Sit down, boy,” Grant said from his relaxed place at the table. “She’ll be alright. My wife’s done this four times. She’s stronger than you would believe.”
“That doesn’t mean she’ll be alright!” He flopped himself into a chair and leaned his forehead on the table. “I’m not ready to be a father.”
Grant chuckled, placing a gentle hand on Kade’s shoulder. “My oldest is sixteen. I’m still not ready to be a father.”
“What if I’m not good enough? Karen is wonderful. She and her child deserve the best father and husband available.” He sat up, rubbing his eyes. “What if I do something wrong, Grant? Or what if I never love Karen or her child?”
“You don’t have to worry. If you pay attention, I think you’ll find that you care for Karen more than you’ve noticed. As for the child, the moment that baby is born, it will need a father. Someone to protect it. And you need someone to protect.” Grant smiled fondly, likely remembering his children’s births. “Besides. Once you look into those sweet little eyes, you’re theirs, as long as you have breath.”
The door to the bedroom opened, and Mrs. Zooker stepped out, a smile on her wrinkling face. “It’s a girl, Kade.”
His heart stopped, and time seemed to do the same. “A girl,” he whispered.
Mrs. Zooker gestured for Kade to follow her into the bedroom, then disappeared inside. He looked back at Grant, who nodded. Taking a deep breath, Kade walked quietly into the room, feeling almost as though he were trespassing.
Sitting on the edge of the bed, wearing her night dress and a smile, was Karen. Her blue-green eyes were alight as she looked up at him. Any other time, she was embarrassed to have him see her in her night things. This time, she didn’t seem to notice.
“Would you like to hold her?” she asked, drawing his attention to the bundle in her arms. The baby was red as a blush and delicate looking as china. Her eyes were closed as she slept, her tiny hands balled into fists.
Karen stood, moving to place the tiny girl in Kade’s arms. He took her reluctantly, afraid that such a small thing would break at his touch. When the little one changed hands, she waved a fist, startled. A little cry rose from her mouth, small and heart-grabbing. No, Kade would ha
ve no trouble loving the child. Glancing up to smile at Karen, he realized he would have no trouble learning to love his wife, either.
Lone Oak Texas
June 1866
“It’s been a full week, Kade,” Karen said, adjusting her hold on the baby. “You have to choose a name at some point.”
“I don’t want to give her a name that she won’t like.” He thought for a long moment before an idea finally came to him. “What do you think about Lizette?”
Glancing down at the baby, with her downy blond hair and her big, brown eyes, Karen smiled. “I Think that’s perfect. Lizette Remington, the most precious thing God ever brought into being.”
“I hate to tell you this,” Kade said, making her sigh, as she knew what he’d say. “But I have to get going. Grant and Herold will never forget it if I’m not there.”
Karen nodded, tempted to rise from her seat at the table and kiss him, a thought that was entirely out of the question. While she wished that he could stay for the morning, it was a vain wish. There was work to be done, and as long as that was true, Kade would have to go every day.
For reasons Karen didn’t wish to say, it was hard to watch him head out that day. She smiled, though, to think of him coming back to the house that night. Setting Lizette in the bassinet Kade had made, she kissed her daughter’s head.
“Do you want to know a secret, love?” Looking around to be sure that her husband was gone she whispered, “I’m falling in love with you father.”
********
As another week came and went, Karen began to find it harder to keep her feelings to herself. No matter how quiet she kept, though, her heart was poured into her actions. Taking Kade’s hand while walking, cooing her best, and, of course, there were the times she hugged him forwardly, unable to help herself.
She knew what it felt like to fall in love, to have someone love you in return. And it was a beautiful thing. But she wasn’t sure that Kade felt the same way. He never held her hand or held her close. He never said anything that could give her any clues.
Heading into the bedroom to make her bed, she snatched Kade’s blanket and pillow off the floor. She folded the blanket, setting it on top of the chest of drawers in the corner. Just as Karen pulled the blanket up to the top of the bed, Lizette began to cry. Heading to the kitchen with an affectionate smile, she said, “I’m coming, dear.”
Coming into the kitchen, the first thing she noticed was that her daughter was not is her cradle. The second thing she noticed, out of the corner of her eye, was that a man stood near the table. On the assumption that the man was her husband, she turned to him with a smile.
“Kade, I thought you’d-” She stopped, and so did her heart. The man was not Kade. He was a nightmare, someone she’d thought to have seen the last of.
“Hello, Karen my sweet. Did you miss me?” Mr. Laurel, eyes full of cold anger, smiled. “Your daughter and I were just getting acquainted.”
“Please,” Karen squeaked. “Don’t hurt her. She’s just a baby.”
“Oh, my darling, I thought you would know me better. Why would I hurt the child without cause?” Pausing, a calmly questioning look on his face, he held the crying girl closer. “You won’t give me cause, will you, my love?”
“No,” she whispered. God, protect my daughter. Protect Kade, she thought. “If you would set her in the cradle, I’ll ready some tea for you.”
“Now that’s more to my liking. A groveling woman, glad to do my bidding.” He smirked. “Aren’t you glad to be reunited?” He set Lizette in her bassinet, and she stopped crying. “Aren’t you?”
“Yes, I am.” Karen glanced towards the window. She told herself that Kade would be home soon, that he would help. Her eyes found the hunting rifle by the door. Her husband had taught her to shoot it, but how could she get to it?
“Oh, and my beautiful little thing, don’t think that horrible man will come back. I’ve come to save you, and I know he won’t be back for at least three more hours. And your gun isn’t loaded. Guess who’s taken the bullets?”
Mr. Laurel pulled a leather pouch from his pocket and shook it. The jingle of the casing connecting set Karen’s teeth on edge. She went to the pump, filling her tea kettle with water. When she returned to the kitchen, she placed it on the still-hot wood stove to boil.
“I’m surprised you didn’t go anywhere,” Mr. Laurel said, leaning back and putting his feet on the table.
“I could never leave Lizette,” she replied, slamming a sugar bowl down on the table. “But you probably know that.”
“Dear, me, we’ve had a misunderstanding. You will leave her.” Karen opened her mouth to argue, but he reached in his coat, pulling out a revolver and silencing her. “You’ll leave both of them, and become my wife.”
********
Kade took off his hat, scratching his head as he surveyed the cattle. They seemed to be growing finely. So far the only trouble that day had been Grant and Herold, making bets on when he would tell Karen the truth. That he loved her.
“I think it’ll be in the next week,” Herold said, riding a quick circle around Kade. “The boy’s always been one to rush.”
“No, sir,” Grant called out. “It’ll be next decade because our Kade is a bit scared.”
“How about it’ll be none of your business?” Herold gave a low whistle, pulling up alongside Kade.
“Or it could be now.” Kade shook his head, but Herold held up a hand. “I was in love once. And I lost her, simply because I didn’t have the courage to risk getting hurt.”
“Karen and I are married. She can’t leave me.”
“Well,” Grant said, scratching his chin. “There’s divorce though Karen wouldn’t do that. But she doesn’t have to leave for you to lose her.”
Kade took a deep, slow breath, then nodded. “Alright, I’ll tell her right now.” He rode off at a trot, headed towards the house. He didn’t stop when Grant yelled that it was too early to go home. There are some things more important than cows.
********
“Get in the wagon,” Mr. Laurel said, kissing Karen’s cheek and shoving her towards his buckboard. The barrel of his revolver pressed into her lower back, the muzzle cold through the fabric of her shirt.
Karen adjusted her hold on Lizette before climbing into the wagon. The bench was splintery, and she supposed he’d purchased it cheaply, specifically for his kidnapping. When Mr. Laurel climbed into the wagon, she slid as far away from him as possible.
“You always have been a proper one, haven’t you? Appropriate distance. Never fear, you won’t need to worry about that for long.” He smiled over at me, the same handsome smile he’d always had. The one that made me sick. “We’ll be married soon.”
He snapped the reins against the horse’s hide, sending them down the road. They’d gone several miles when Karen said with a smile, “I’m already married.”
Mr. Laurel jerked the wagon to a stop. Karen nearly toppled to the ground, and would have if he hadn’t grabbed her arm tightly enough to hurt. She gasped at the pain, and Lizette began to cry, waving her little fists in the air.
“I’d forgotten about him.” Mr. Laurel took a deep breath. When he spoke again, his voice was much softer. “No worries, though. I’ll take care of him the moment he arrives back in his cozy little house.”
********
Kade couldn’t stop the grin on his face as he put his horse in its stall. He was going to tell her. Though his stomach turned over with nervousness, he was still excited. And something told him that Karen would be glad to hear it. And perhaps, if he was as blessed as he hoped he was, she might say she loved him, too.
When he went to the house, something didn’t feel right. He didn’t hear anything - not Lizette, not Karen. None of the usual sounds he associated with his family. And then there were two thuds. Footsteps, but too heavy to be Karen.
Drawing his gun from the holster at his hip, Kade quietly opened the door, praying silently. The door creaked, protesting his
entry, or maybe trying to warn him about what it was hiding. Either way, he was going inside.
The house was dim, as it always was when the day began to fade. In one of the chairs, Kade saw his wife, his beautiful, sweet wife. He smiled, thinking at first that he may have been wrong, that nothing was amiss. But then he noticed the ropes around her wrists, tying her to the chair. There was a gag in her mouth, and the sight of it broke his heart.
“Karen,” he whispered. She shook her head, looking towards the bedroom door. Kade raised the gun that he’d nearly forgotten, turning towards the bedroom.
“Oh, are you looking for me?” A man stood in the doorway, a wriggling bundle in his arms. “I don’t believe we’ve met. I’m Alexander Laurel, Karen’s betrothed. And who might you be?”
[2016] A Widow's Love Page 5
