“It’s uh, something I think of you as.” He replied warily. I put my shirt back on, standing up to look at him. His hair was a messy array, my attempt to fix it was useless. I think I just wanted to touch it.
“Why?” My brows turned up. A sly smile found his face. He seems like he doesn’t smile often, not genuinely anyway.
I did not have to guess to know something made him that way. That there was something I did not know. And that I wanted to know. I told myself to stop getting ahead of myself.
“Because of your eyes. They’re so big and bright. It’s cute.” I was flattered, honestly.
“I’m not cute.” I teased him.
He stepped closer to me, closing any space there was.
“You are. You’re also very beautiful,” he tucked some hair behind my ear—it was such a sweet gesture. “And I love your body. Want to see more of it sometime.”
His eyes trailed down my front to prove a point. I did not question him meaning what he said. I felt it. The intensity of his eyes was genuine.
“Thank you.” I replied.
His brow arched, “don’t you want to see mine?” He teased.
I knew I had to say something, but I did not want to because I knew I had to be honest too. I always have to be upfront, that’s why men never stick around past the first date when I won’t sleep with them? So why did I have sex with Tristan that night? Who knows. All I know is I have to be honest. It’s why I haven’t had sex in months before that night, but maybe why my heart hasn’t been broken since the tenth grade.
“I do but…I don’t do the whole casual sex thing, I—I’m just not built for it.” His gaze did not falter from mine. In fact, it grew more intense.
“Unfortunately, that’s all I’m about right now.” I furrowed my brow.
“Why?” My heart sunk a little. But it was like I wasn’t ready to just give up on him. Or let him go. You don’t even have him.
“Just is.” His expression was dark, his brows hooded.
“Someone hurt you.” I stated. He did not say anything. But he did not move either, his grip on my waist tightened. He wants me. But how much?
“I won’t pry.” I added. He nodded as if to say thank you.
But all I want to do was pry.
Chapter Nineteen: Tristan
I could feel it in my spine. How much my body wanted her. That wasn’t even a question.
The real one is if I could give her anything else, want anything else. She looked at me like she wanted me, those big blue circles holding the sea bore right through me and make me question everything. If I could trust her. Something told me I could, and it was stronger than with Vivian. The thought of her made me shudder.
I heard something in her voice, a curiosity and care that I usually don’t get from anyone but my family. But I respected her for not wanting to give only half of her. Most women…never mind.
I went dark for a moment, of course someone had hurt me. Bad. I wasn’t sure if I could ever open up again. I had to distract myself with the purpose of this chance meeting. Gabrielle would be pissed if I did not get this right. She is so hard to please, I wonder how Levi survived.
“Let me buy you some lunch. Then we can talk.” I did not phrase it as a question.
She exhausted me and built up my appetite, I was sure she was hungry too. Besides, I wanted to see if I could do something with her that did not involve knocking genitals. I wouldn’t deny it and say I did not want to get to know her more. Maybe we could friends, I just don’t know if I could open up my heart again.
“Okay.”
She nodded.
I took her to the café just down the street, it was walking distance. It felt familiar, walking with my hand on her waist and her tucked into my side. She was soft, she belonged there. What?
I chose a secluded table and we ordered quickly. She went to the bathroom as soon as we got there, then came back, sipping on her tea like she was teasing me. I had imagined those perfect lips around my cock too many times.
“I really thought I would never see you again.” She finally said.
The table was small, our knees brushed as I leaned forward.
“Me too…you thought of me?” I smiled at the question. She had no idea.
“Yeah, all the fucking time. Never met a woman like you before.” I admitted. Her eyes glinted as her cheeks flushed, I don’t think she gets complimented often.
“I thought about you too.” She smiled timidly. How can she be so wild when we fuck and then so timid at lunch?
We ate our pasta salads in relative silence, but it was nice sharing a meal with a female other than my sister or mom.
“I should apologize, for accusing you of being engaged.” We had finished up, and she had been regarding me warily for a while.
“It’s okay,” I shrugged, “it’s just funny because I can’t stand the bride. But my best friend loves her, so I tolerate her.”
She giggled softly. I turned serious, speaking of.
“Look, I really need your help. With the wedding. It’s in two weeks so I know it’s short notice. But I’m desperate.” I pleaded. She stared back at me.
“I could never turn down a chance to build my portfolio. I’ll do it.”
“Thank you,” I could let out a breath of relief. I did not know how tense I was about it. “Gabriella is a real handful though. She will probably be the worst bride you ever work with.” I smirked, but her smile did not quite reach her ears.
“I can handle it, but…if I take the job we can’t do whatever we’re doing anymore. I was already so unprofessional this morning, I have to put my career first. So, no more, um…what we’ve done.”
I was disappointed, and in awe at the same time. I barely know her an I respected her. I don’t know if I ever respected Vivian. But Emilia had earned it in seconds. It sucked, but I wouldn’t force her. Not literally, anyway.
“I understand.”
Her smile was tight. I knew she did not want to do it. But she still did. She was strong, determined, even despite this morning—professional. She reminded me of myself. This project wouldn’t take forever. We can hold off until the wedding. At least, I think I could.
~
We went back to the floral shop and Gabriella met us there. She was nice in the beginning. Kindly introducing herself and what not. I hadn’t seen her in a while so I did hug her, I’m not a total asshole.
“You look good, how are you?” I asked her. She was in her scrubs, so obviously busy with work. We went to a private room in the back. Emilia sat across from us, making it feel more like we were in fact engaged.
“Good, my fellowship is rough, but good. What about Vivian, did she finally sign?” my eyes fleeted to Emilia, who looked on as I expected her to. In confusion.
“Yeah, she did. It’s over.” My voice was tight. It still got to me, what she did.
“I’m glad…so, Emilia. I have so many ideas.”
I sat back as Gabriella chattered away. Emilia took her through the catalog, but then took out blank paper instead and sketched stuff out. Gabriella changed everything three times. We were there for hours before she decided on a base design, not even the flowers yet.
I did warn her.
Chapter Twenty: Emilia
I wondered who Vivian was the entire time during the meeting. I assumed a girlfriend, but since Gabrielle said sign, I leaned towards marriage.
Was he married?
Maybe that was the hurt he did not want to talk about. I could not ask him about it. I already said we could not do things anymore. We could be friends. I knew that would never go well. So, I pushed it aside and got to work.
Gabriella was a real…piece of work. She was excited to get married, though it seemed like she didn’t even want to because she changed everything. And then Tristan. He was such a tease. His knee kept brushing over mine, the table was so close his thigh touched mine too, and he made use of the advantage. My whole body was on fire the whole time.
I
should have known he wouldn’t make it easy to resist him. I knew he wouldn’t force me, but his teasing was getting to be something I could not handle. By the time we left, I was flushed and I felt the familiar wetness between my legs.
He walked us out, and Gabriella took off in her flashy car.
“Told you she was a handful.” He smirked. I just shrugged.
I had forgotten he drove me here, so we walked backed to his car together. His hand wasn’t on my waist like last time, but we brushed together with every step.
“It’s okay. I suppose I should get used to it for weddings. At least she isn’t mean about it.” If she had been rude, I would have called her out on it. But she wasn’t. She is just very specific. When I figured out she was a dermatologist, I considered going to see her about my freckles. I was never too fond of them.
“Maybe. We could get some dinner on the way back.”
I arched a brow as I looked up at him, “two meals in one day?” I asked.
“It’s just as friends. Promise.” I did not believe him, but then again, I did not believe myself either. I was hungry anyway.
“Well I am hungry, I hope you don’t think I eat too much.” I giggled. He opened the door for me, even taking it upon himself to strap me in.
“You’re very refreshing to be around.” He chuckled.
On the road, he asked what I wanted, but I had no particular craving. We ended up at a diner.
“I love diners.” I said as we sat down. I ordered coffee too, even though it was late, I was so mentally exhausted I needed it.
“Really?” he asked.
“Yeah. My dad and I go when we see each other.” I thought of him. I should call him more. “And the wall paper usually has my favorite flower. Maybe it’s a diner thing.”
“What’s your favorite flower?” He looked to see the wallpaper, but this one did not have it.
“Buttercups.” I answered, and he smirked. I sipped my coffee slowly. It was far too hot
“You remember mine?” He asked.
“Yeah, lilacs. I had them at the front of my store…”
“Before you thought I was a cheating bastard?” He interrupted. I blushed from embarrassment. I still regretted thinking so badly of him so fast, but I could not help it.
I was glad he wasn’t, anyway. Though it did not change that I still could not be with him. I was too early in the game to mess things up for a man that isn’t guaranteed to be in my life.
“Um, I guess. I’ll put them back up, they looked good up there.”
He grinned and sipped his sweet tea, which was mostly sugar.
“So, your dad, are you guys close?” Was he trying to get to know me? I wasn’t sure I could open up to him, but I think I already had.
“Yeah, I don’t see him too often though. Just the holidays.” I could not tell him how different he was since my mother died. I looked exactly like her, maybe it was just too hard for him.
I ordered a chicken finger basket, and Tristan got a BLT.
“What about your parents?” I asked. He arched a brow.
“You really don’t know who I am, do you?”
I racked my brain. He wasn’t an actor. And he wasn’t on any house wife shows and that’s all I watched, so I could not place him.
“No. School me.” I shrugged.
“My parents, the Cox’s, own half the real estate in the state. They probably own the building you lease. And I used to own one of the largest tech startups of the century before I sold it for three-and half billion dollars.” My eyes widened on their own accord.
That was a lot to take in at once. Basically, he was old money rich and new money rich. And people usually know who he is.
“Oh…why did you sell it?” He shrugged.
“It was always meant to be a startup. The revenue got to a certain point and then I just wasn’t in it anymore. But my parents and I are relatively close. I have a sister, Natalie. She’s a psychologist.” I smiled softly, he beamed when he talks about his family.
“Does she try to make you her patient a lot?” He laughed from his belly.
“Yeah, all the fucking tine.” He was annoyed, but not so much because it’s his sister. It was sweet.
When our food arrived, I ate up greedily. He would still ask me stuff—when I opened my shop, why I did. But I would not talk about my mom yet. It was still too hard. But my curiosity was eating me alive. I sipped the rest of my coffee, there was no alcohol so it served as my liquid courage.
“Who is Vivian?”
He stared back at me, a coldness washing over his otherwise happy green eyes. I saw his throat bob as he swallowed with a sharp inhale. Maybe I overstepped, I averted my gaze to my crumbed plate. I did not think he would answer me.
“She’s my ex-wife.”
I suspected that. I don’t know how it made me feel, honestly. He had a life before me.
“You were married?” Dumb question, but I was blanking for good responses. He nodded.
“Yeah, for ten years.”
I exhaled.
“That’s a long time…can I ask what happened? If you don’t mind, of course.”
His tongue pressed against his cheek, his jaw gritting. I was immediately distracted by the strength of his jaw. As his fists clenched, the veins of his arm protruded against the fine hairs. This woman really hurt him. It made my blood boil, why? I had known him two days, collectively. But for a month I have pictured him, imagined him, built him up as a person. I attached myself to a maybe, and now here he was. I told myself it was natural. That I wasn’t crazy, overthinking things.
“She cheated on me. With her optometrist.” I stifled a gasp.
I was mad at the bitch. Yes, mad. How could she hurt him like that! Tristan was seemingly kind and genuine, I couldn’t imagine anyone betraying him like that.
“That’s low. I’m so sorry.” I could not—did not resist the urge to reach out and touch his hands gently.
He let out a breath, and overturned his hands to take mine. They closed over mine, large and warm. It soothed my entire body. This was already too dangerous, too deep.
“It is what it is. Anyway, we’re divorced now. She took a lot of my money, but I’m just glad to be rid of her.” He tried to brush it off. But I knew it hurt, I could hear it in his voice. Feel it; I saw it in the tenseness of his body.
“I can’t imagine why she would do that. You seem like a really good man.”
“Seem?” His playful smirk returned and I relaxed.
“For now.”
Chapter Twenty One: Tristan
There was never a woman that invaded my thoughts as much as Emilia had.
It was just like after the party. She was on my mind every morning, and every afternoon and evening. Of course, it sucked I couldn’t have sex with her unless I am imagining it. I wanted her. There is no doubt about it. I wished she wasn’t so head strong.
I wanted to adhere to her wishes of keeping this professional, but I was a natural tease after all. It made it easier over text message, that way she didn’t yell at me. Quite frankly actually seeing her angry was a turn on.
Morning, baby doll.
I texted her every morning. At first, she would just remind me of what she said a few days ago. It had only been a week since that day in the flower shop. I was still going out of my mind, and I hadn’t even seen her. I tried making dinner arrangements, then stepped it down to lunch, and even just a drink. She kept denying it. I guess I should be flattered that she doesn’t trust herself around me.
Hey Tristan.
That’s all I get??
Yes.
I figured I would leave her alone for a second. I did not get out of bed until almost noon, I had to say I liked this new way of living but I did feel extremely unproductive. I made some coffee and used my home gym that I was almost never in.
It had pretty much everything except hogging gym goers. I hit the weights until my muscles twitched everywhere, and finished it off with cardio on the treadmil
l. As I downed my water, I thought of teasing Emilia even more. It might only be pissing her off, but it was still too much fun.
I stepped to the wall mirror and snapped a picture, I was sans shirt and it felt like high school, maybe even junior high but I still did it. I’m not conceited, but I take care of myself; run, lift weights, eat well. I looked good. Doesn’t mean I’m cocky, but I was confident. She sent a message back in less than a minute. I smirked.
But I decided to make her wait until I was out of the shower and dressed. When I saw the reply, I wanted to take another shower. A cold one. Baby doll was good at playing the game. She sent back a picture of herself. I could tell she was in her flower shop because behind her was the familiar wall of peonies, but she was in a thin tank top with skinny straps. I hoped it wasn’t what she was wearing because I could see everything clearly. She might as well be naked. The rosy pink of her nipples poked through. Fuck me.
I hope that isn’t what you’re wearing at work…
No. She replied with another picture of herself in a tunic with a zipper down the front, hence why she needed the tank I guess.
Good. Wouldn’t want anyone seeing that.
Why? You aren’t the boss of me.
No, I’m not. But you seem to be the boss of my cock ‘cause it doesn’t listen to me anymore.
She sent me back at least ten smiley faces. Though it wasn’t funny to either of us.
What are you doing? I asked her.
Organizing the shop and I just finished a design for Gabriella.
I had an idea then. That wedding was the only reason for me to even see her.
So, we should meet and discuss it then. Tomorrow morning?
I almost held my breath. I wanted to see her so badly that I had to physically leave my phone in my den as I went to the kitchen to grab a beer. When I got back I checked her response.
I’ll speak with Gabriella about it.
What the fuck?
Well I guess it makes sense, it was her wedding. But I wasn’t too beat up because I know Gabriella doesn’t have the schedule that allows her to go to noon meetings with her florist, even if it was for her wedding. Levi was pulling all the weight of his case now. So, I waited patiently. When my phone rang, I jumped slightly, thinking it was Emilia.
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