by Adi Alsaid
“That’s in May.”
“I’m so appreciative, I couldn’t wait that long.”
“That’s enough,” Dr. Hill said. “Mr. Marroney would be within his rights to press charges against you and file a restraining order, but he was considerate enough to come to us first and ask us to intervene. You should be thankful he did, because a police record could jeopardize your graduation, not to mention your collegiate future.”
Julia wished she could record the conversation so Dave could laugh with her about it. He’d joked about her getting a restraining order. That she’d come close to actually getting one was, in her opinion, a smashing success, and maybe even better than hooking up with a teacher. Julia’s mom would have a good laugh about this. It wasn’t exactly playing keep-away with a security guard’s lunch in Singapore, but it was tinged with just the right distaste for authority.
“You’ve clearly crossed the line, and I need your word that it stops now. I want you to apologize to Mr. Marroney for the discomfort you’ve caused.”
Julia raised her hands up. “No, you’re right. Mr. Marroney, I am so sorry for all the discomfort I’ve caused. I never meant for it. Quite the opposite, really.”
“Ms. Stokes.”
Marroney was looking down, a thin sheen of sweat visible on his forehead. Maybe it was her imagination, but she thought she saw his lip quivering beneath his mustache. He rubbed his hands over each other like he was trying to calm himself.
“That time it legitimately just came out wrong. I never meant to make you uncomfortable, truly. I was having a bit of fun, and I’m sorry I took it so far. I was mostly kidding.” Dr. Hill raised his eyebrows at her. “Entirely kidding,” she corrected, even though deep down, there was something she found appealing about Marroney. It wasn’t a physical attraction like she’d joked about with Dave, but something had made her pick him over every other teacher. “I promise to no longer cross any sort of lines or give you any baked goods or recite any kind of poetry in your honor.”
“Mr. Marroney, is that enough of an apology for you?”
“Let’s just put the matter behind us.” He tried to sigh, but it came out more like a wheeze. Julia fought the urge to settle things with a hug. He really looked like he was near tears.
“Wonderful,” Dr. Hill said, clapping his hands together. “Julia, first period’s about to begin, you can go straight there.”
Julia stood from her chair, a little sad that she’d have to back off. She wanted to run straight to Dave to tell him what happened, but homeroom was over and her English teacher was way too intense about tardiness, so it would have to wait. Julia went to her locker to grab her copy of Heart of Darkness, which she’d read exactly zero percent of. She rummaged around until she found a half-filled crossword puzzle she could entertain herself with, then shut her locker and turned down the hall to get to class. Halfway there, eyes already searching the crossword clues, she ran right into Dave.
“Hey,” he said, his arm on her shoulder to steady her from the impact. He pulled it away slowly. “I saw you walk out of Hill’s office. What was all that about?”
The hallway filled with the sound of people talking, making their way to their classes. Julia didn’t know how anyone could be so chatty and loud that early in the morning. People pushed past them, their backpacks hanging off their shoulders, phones in their hands. Dave looked so great in the morning. She wondered how he did that, how he always seemed ready for the day as soon as it arrived. Maybe it had something to do with sleep cycles, or it was just the softness of the morning light that worked with his features. He was probably having completely normal thoughts, and here she was trying to figure out why her best friend looked good in the morning. Maybe she was still hungover. She shook the thought away, wanting to get to the apology, to make sure he knew she stood right where she always had. “Marroney finally ratted me out. Never hook up with a teacher might officially be off the docket.”
“That’s too bad.” He shifted the weight of his backpack and put his hand on the back of his neck like he always did when he was nervous. Were things awkward? Had the fight been that bad? “Are we going to talk about the other night?” Dave said.
“God, yes, please. Sorry I didn’t text. The dads had me spit-shine the whole house, which I probably deserved. Also, sorry about our fight. I guess I was a little drunk. I remember you telling me about Gretchen and that’s about it. Was I a bitch about it?”
Dave smiled in that cute, sheepish way he often did and shrugged. “Maybe a little bit.”
“Well, that sucks.” Julia stepped out of her shoes, feeling the comfort of the floor on her bare feet. “Whatever I said, I’m sorry I said it. Did you yell back at me?”
“There was some yelling.”
“David Daniel Davis, get the hell out of here! You yelled? I’m so proud of you. Tell me more.”
Dave blushed. “I was mean.”
“Wow, I brought the mean out of you? I’ve never seen you be mean. What did I say?”
“You made fun of me for liking Gretchen.” Dave’s hand was still clutching the back of his neck and she chuckled as she pulled it down for him. The mention of Gretchen made Julia’s heart sink for some reason, but the touch of his skin on her fingers was solid and reassuring.
Julia grimaced. “I’m sorry I was a drunken asshole. That was very cliché of me. I remember that part, and you’re completely right. It’ll never happen again. Except for the five or six times I still have to be a cliché to live out the Nevers. I’m happy for you, Dave. Now Marroney and I have someone to go on double dates with!”
Dave laughed and shoved his hands into his pockets. “I’m sorry about what I said, too. Every time I think about it I feel sick. Things were heated. I didn’t mean it.”
“Water under the proverbial bridge,” Julia said, feeling that peculiar urge to poke him. But when her finger touched his stomach, it didn’t just pull away like it always did. It lingered there as if it had its own agenda, and Julia had to take a step backward to keep from making the moment awkward. What the hell was going on with her? “I’m going to try to get to know Gretchen better,” she said. “With the exception of your gross underappreciation for a certain faculty member at this school, you’re the best judge of character I know. If you say she’s cool, she’s cool.”
“Thanks, Julia,” he said, smiling sheepishly like he was wont to do.
“No worries.” The hallway was quieter now, just a few stragglers shutting their lockers and rushing to class, the sound of their sneakers slapping against the linoleum floor. Teachers reached to shut their doors so latecomers couldn’t sneak in. “I gotta get going or else Ms. T is gonna smack me around for being late. See ya!” Julia said, forcing cheerfulness.
They parted ways with a smile and Julia took a seat in class, happy that the tension had been put to rest so easily. That she was having strange thoughts and buzzing at his touch could be chalked up to it still being so early in the morning. Cringing when she thought of Gretchen, that was just because of what she knew about Gretchen, nothing to do with Dave liking her. Maybe the buzzing was just relief that everything was still right between Julia and Dave, relief that her ominous recollection of their fight had been a case of overworrying. This was all normal.
CUE THE MONTAGE
JULIA HAD BEEN the one to suggest the three of them hang out together. She wanted to see in Gretchen whatever it was Dave saw in her. She really did, even if she had her doubts about it.
Julia parked her car at Morro Bay, running late as usual. She stepped out of her car, avoiding a beer bottle that lay shattered nearby. When Dave’s bench came into view, it was strange to see a second body on it next to his. Julia had always loved this moment, the slow, watchful approach before Dave saw her.
Now there was a head of blond waves next to him, and Julia could hear them laughing. The sound a
ctually slowed her down. She felt like she was about to interrupt, which was bullshit. This was Julia’s bench to share with Dave. If anyone should feel like she was interrupting, it was Gretchen.
This was not normal. Gretchen being there, and Julia’s reaction to it.
She took a breath, forced herself to move at a normal speed, to approach casually. “Hi, guys,” she called out, waving.
“Hi,” Dave said. “You guys know each other, right?”
“Yeah, of course,” Gretchen said, waving her hand once across her body, “we had world history together last year.”
“And we have a standing appointment every Tuesday to talk about you behind your back,” Julia said. “Nothing too judgmental. Just what color you should dye your hair, how you’re super conceited for running for prom king. That kind of thing.”
“Oh my God, teach me to keep a straight face like you do,” Gretchen said. “That was so good. You didn’t even flinch.”
Julia smiled and went to Dave’s side of the bench, scooting him toward the middle, feeling bittersweet that he’d be closer to both her and Gretchen. “Sorry I’m late. What’d I miss?”
“Well, Dave was telling me he’s never mall-ratted before, and I was having trouble believing him.”
“Mall-ratting? That’s a thing? I thought that was a made-up term from that nineties movie.”
“Apparently it exists,” Dave says. “People go to the mall. To hang out. For hours.”
“Surely, you mean they go to indulge in the great tradition of consumerism before returning home to enjoy their recently purchased products,” Julia said.
“No. Just...to spend time at the mall.”
“Spend money, you mean.”
“I can’t tell if you guys are kidding,” Gretchen said. “You’ve seriously never hung out at the mall? You’re going to get your teenager licenses revoked.”
“I don’t think we were ever issued any,” Dave said. “We’re eighteen and going on sixty-five.”
“Look, having better taste than most people our age doesn’t excuse you from missing out on a major part of adolescence.”
“Wasting time in a symbol of capitalism is a major part of adolescence?”
“You’re goddamn right,” Gretchen said, her voice giving away her desire to laugh, and damn if Julia didn’t find that charming. Julia suddenly felt nauseous. Gretchen stood up, pulling out a set of car keys from the pocket of her jeans. “Come on, I’ll drive. We’re going to the mall.”
“I feel like she’s not going to let this go,” Julia said, getting up and standing by Gretchen. They were similarly built, Julia noticed. Almost the exact same height, though Julia wasn’t wearing shoes, and Gretchen’s hair gave her an extra quarter inch. Julia had no idea why that would matter, why she would suddenly start measuring herself against this girl who was nothing like her. “You and I are rebels. We should rebel against capitalism by defacing it with the refusal to spend money. Plus, it wasn’t on the list, but it may as well have been. We’re looking for ordinary high school experiences, and if Gretchen says this one’s worth doing, well then, let’s give it a shot.”
“Thank you, Julia,” Gretchen said, and Julia watched as she reached over and grabbed Dave by the wrist, pulling him up to his feet, her fingers lingering on his skin like they were used to touching him, like they belonged on him.
o o o
On the drive to the mall, Julia discovered backseats are a kind of hell when you are there on your own. She’d sat behind Gretchen, giving her a clear view of Dave and how often he looked toward the driver’s side. She could barely hear the conversation, and had to stick her face in between theirs to not feel like she was on a deserted island.
“I have to hand it to you, Gretchen,” Julia said at the first opportunity she could. “You are rocking this minivan so well that I can’t tell if you’re doing it ironically or not.”
“Oh, you mean Vantastic? No irony here; I love this thing. It’s been in the family for about twenty years. I couldn’t wait to drive it, even though half the time I’m in it I am actively fearing death.”
Dave glanced over his shoulder at Julia, giving her a smile that she understood immediately: Isn’t she so much more than you thought? Julia stuck her tongue out at Dave, the move feeling too middle school even as she did it, like a girl desperate to be cute.
When they walked in through the glass doors of the mall, Julia instinctively cringed. “Dave, tell Gretchen what the look on my face means.”
“She’s going to throw up.”
“You guys are ridiculous.”
They were walking in the direction of the food court, the three of them in a row, Dave in the middle. Julia spotted the kid who’d fallen asleep on her couch after the party, but he was a bit too far away to yell at.
“So,” Dave said, “how, exactly, does one mall-rat?”
“Technically, we’ve started.” Gretchen extended her arms outward, as if presenting them with a new world. “Yaaaay,” she said, poking just enough fun at herself for Julia to feel a shift starting to take place. Julia was starting to like Gretchen, and it shouldn’t have been a problem. It should have been great, all the more reason to be happy for Dave. But it was a problem, one that caused her throat to dry up. “Actually, I know the best way to break you guys into this,” Gretchen said. “And I’ll admit, this isn’t exactly within the normal mall-ratting activity. But it’s my favorite thing to do, especially on days when I’m feeling a little down.”
She took them to the food court and ordered a single ice-cream cone, not allowing them to get their own. Then she led them toward the escalators down to the first floor, only licking away the drops that threatened to drip onto her hand. A little kid in front of them dangled his shoelaces near the gap at the edge of the escalator stairs while his mom stared at her phone, her free hand gripping his like that was all there was to parenting. Julia caught Gretchen shaking her head. They walked past what seemed to be the same exact athletic shoe store replicated in three different spots, then entered the pet store that was tucked away in the corner.
It was a sad place, puppies in glass cages, frolicking as much as they could, trying to avoid little puddles of pee they’d left behind. Some yipped happily, some whimpered, some looked defeated and just stared through the glass as if they’d given up. A mutt with short brown fur lay on its front paws, looking up at Julia with big, sad eyes that reminded her of Dave’s. She looked over at Dave peering into the dog’s cage and felt the urge to throw her arms around his neck, which was silly.
An employee came by, a tall and lanky guy with a slouch and a pronounced Adam’s apple. Gretchen asked him if she could pet a dog. The guy shrugged, probably bored, his mind rotting away inside the depressing pet store all day.
“This one!” Julia said, pointing at the scruffy brown puppy, desperate for the dog’s warmth, for something to touch. “If I’d known puppy-holding was involved in mall-ratting I might have been more receptive,” she said, taking the dog in her arms.
“Just you wait,” Gretchen said, stepping up to Julia. “This might feel weird at first. Just trust me.” She reached out and dipped the ice-cream cone against Julia’s nose.
“What the hell?” Julia forced a laugh. Dave stood behind Gretchen, his head tilted.
Gretchen just smiled, and within a second or two the mutt had sniffed out the ice cream and was licking Julia’s nose enthusiastically. Julia laughed, which resulted in the dog trying to slip her some tongue, so she turned her head to the side a little to avoid the kisses but keep the whole nose-licking thing going. “I’m so happy right now,” Julia said, feeling better, though there was nothing she should have been feeling better from.
“Just looking at what’s happening is making me happier than I’ve been in years,” Dave said. “Seriously, years.”
Even the lanky employee
cracked a smile. The three of them took turns passing the dog to each other, then touching the increasingly melting ice-cream cone to their noses. To keep the dog from getting sick from all the ice cream, and because the other locked-up dogs seemed to be in ravenous fits of jealousy, the employee took away the Dave-looking mutt and brought a few other ones: twin golden retrievers, a spotted pit bull, something that looked less like a dog and more like a gremlin. They kept going until the ice cream was nothing but a puddle dripping through the bottom of the soggy cone.
They left the pet store mildly dazed, smiles still plastered on their faces. “Touché,” Julia said. “I’m going to do that from now on. Always. Every day of my life.”
Dave, standing close to Gretchen, gave her a little shoulder bump. “What else you got?”
“Cue the montage,” Julia said, a bit too sarcastically, that unexpected jealousy almost giving rise to anger.
Gretchen laughed. “You’re so right. That would have definitely been the movie cue for a montage.”
They went to the department store and made Dave try on clothes, simply because that was exactly what would happen in the montage. They sat by the dressing room on a bench as the clerk gave them strange looks. “You are the slowest dresser on the planet,” Julia called out, trying to hide the annoyance in her voice, or transfer it over to something she should have been annoyed by. “You’re slowing down our montage. Did you notice the happy pop music stopped playing? That’s your fault.”
“I don’t understand vests,” he called out from the dressing room.
“They go on your chest,” Gretchen called back.
“Har har. And do I really have to wear the hat?”
“Yes!” they said in unison.
He stepped out of the dressing room, looking uncomfortable in his clothes, but undoubtedly handsome. Julia paused, swirling that thought around her head like a beverage she was savoring. Dave was handsome. That wasn’t new information to her; she’d always thought it strange that a great guy like him with his looks had never pursued anyone, had never even accidentally stumbled into a fleeting romance. But had Julia ever thought it in those terms before?
