by ERIN BEDFORD
“Maybe we should take a break?” Alice suggested, adjusting her hair while she dusted off her pants. When she saw we had company she stopped her fiddling and looked to me for guidance.
Standing from the ground, I didn’t bother dusting off myself as I turned to my mother, who was frozen in place.
“Mom, what are you doing here?” I took a step toward her but stopped when she stepped back as well, fear filling her eyes.
She shook her head at me, one hand up and then in a blink of an eye that fear turned to anger, and she was stomping toward me. “Who are you? What have you done with my daughter?” My mother pointed a French manicured finger at my chest.
I shrugged. “Nowhere. I’m right here, where I’ve always been.”
I probably could have tried to appease her more, tried harder to explain, but I was tired of hiding and even more tired of trying to explain myself to those closest to me. Shouldn’t she love me the way I am no matter what?
Her lips pursed together in a thin line as she looked at me and Alice, and then down to the creature that had shriveled back into a regular, old, eggplant. After a moment or two, her eyes narrowed back onto me.
“Don’t think you can fool me, whoever you are. I know what I saw, and I won’t be treated like an insolent child.” She jerked her hand at the purple eggplant lying deserted on the ground.
“Mom, you are being silly.” I crossed my arms over my chest and tapped my foot. “No one is treating you like a child.”
“Don’t call me that.” She bared her teeth at me, snarling.
“Don’t call you what?” I cocked my head to the side. “Silly?”
“Mom.” My mother snapped at me, her eyes full of fire. “You are not my daughter. You have no right to call me that.”
Taken aback by how viciously she had responded, I wasn’t quite sure what to do. My mother had never shown me this side of her. I knew she could be as brutal as the rest of them when it came to something she wanted, but I had never been on the receiving end of it.
Not really able to help myself, I decide to poke the snake. “Well, if that’s the case, I suppose I don’t have to come to dinner anymore. Than Margery won’t need me to call her. You know, since I’m not your daughter and all.” I smirked and watched as my mother’s face began to turn a kind of purple eggplant color from her rage. “I guess that also means that I can color my hair whatever I want, since you know, I’m not your daughter.”
To prove my point, I let my magic ripple over me, changing my white blonde hair into a neon purple.
Picking up the ends of my hair to examine it, I glanced over at Alice. “What do you think? Does it suit me? Maybe I’ll keep it like this when I go to the protest?” My mother gasped in horror as I tried not to grin. “You don’t think anyone would care, do you? I mean, I’m not your daughter, so what I do doesn’t affect you in any way.”
Growling, my mother crossed her arms. “You’ve made your point.”
“Have I?” I cocked my head to the side and waited. When she nodded, I let go of the glamour with a sigh. “I really didn’t expect you to give in so fast, Mom. It’s not like you.”
She flinched when I called her mom again. Maybe she hadn’t accepted me completely.
“Well,” she snapped. “You gave me little choice, and besides, only my daughter would have the audacity to threaten me with purple hair. If you’d been an imposter you would be trying to appease me, not drive me into an early grave.”
“Ah, Mom, that’s so sweet.” I clutched my heart in mock adoration.
“Don’t start with me, Katherine.” She narrowed her eyes, and then turned to Alice as if she had just noticed she was there. “I know you? You’re that woman everyone’s talking about. Gathering the creatures together. What was your name again?”
“Alice.” The blonde Fae supplied, pressing her mouth into a thin line. She didn’t seem to like my mother’s reference to the creatures any more than I did.
“Yes, that’s it.” My mother nodded her head and then dismissed Alice as easily as she had started, turning back to me. “Really, Katherine. I don’t understand what is happening at all. You’re human. How can you even be one of them?” Her nose scrunched up in disgust, and her eyes strayed back to Alice, who glared, and crossed her arms over her chest.
I rubbed my temple and sighed. I didn’t really want to get into the long complicated story that was my existence.
“Would you believe me if I said that there is Fae blood in our family?” I offered up, hoping it would satisfy her need to know the details.
“Nonsense.” She sniffed. “There is no possible way that any of the Nottingtons would ever be with one of those creatures. We are pure.”
“Are you sure about that?” I raised an eyebrow at her, ignoring the fact that her comment was as racist as they came. “Maybe grandmother, or one of the great-grandmothers had a Fae lover we don’t know about.”
My mother opened her mouth to protest, but then closed it with a snap as her brow crinkled. She must have thought of someone that was likely to have that kind of relationship and not tell anyone about it. But if she knew anything she wasn’t telling. Her face smoothed out and a stern frown covered her features.
“Not that I am aware of. Anyways,” she opened her handbag and pulled out a thin card, “I just came by to give you this. Since it will be a few weeks until you can get one of your own.”
I reached out my hand and accepted the card, a little part of me danced with glee when I saw it was a debit card to the account we had talked about. I locked eyes with Alice, trying not to grin like a crazy person.
“Now that is for essentials, bills, food, and the like.” My mother shot us a look. “Not for housing those creatures in your grandmother’s house.”
“Thanks, Mom.” I went to hug her, but she held her hands up to ward me off.
“No hugs, dear. You are covered in dirt. Now that you have the card, I have to be going. I need to let Margery know that the Nottingtons will not be coming to the protest.” She smoothed her hands down her outfit and gave an exasperated sigh. “I suppose I’ll have to tell your father. Though, I have no doubt he will be more pleased than surprised. He always did like the strange and unusual. I’m sure he will want to talk to you about it. Do try and keep the theatrics to a minimum. Being one of them is one thing, but showing it off to the world is another. Besides, who knows what the government will decide in the next few months. You don’t want to end up in some kind of lab being experimented on, do you?”
“Of course not, Mom.” I nodded my head in agreement. I had no ambitions to tell the world of my new status. The fewer people who knew the better in my book. If the Seelie Queen had anything to say about it, I wouldn’t be around much longer for it to matter.
That thought made my heart heavy and my eyes burn. I had the sudden urge to hug my mom but restrained myself. No need to make her worry more than she already was. I didn’t even know if the spell really would kill me, or if it was just Chess being dramatic.
“All right. I’m off. It was good to meet you…Alice.” She gave a small nod and left.
Alice eyed my mother’s retreating back and turned to me with a frown. “We should probably stop for the day.”
“That’s probably a good idea.” I sat on the back steps of my grandmother’s house and sighed.
I’d been house sitting for her for a few months now, and there was still no sign that she would be back from her sabbatical in Florida. Not that I was in any hurry for her to return. There was still a gaping hole in her house that I hadn’t even begun to figure out how to explain to a carpenter. I was lucky my mom had come around the opposite side of the house and not by my room. Or I would have had more than just a small fit to deal with.
“I’m sorry about your mother. Are you all right?” Alice slid down onto the step next to me in a move so graceful I would never have been able to pull it off.
“What do you mean?” I placed my
head on my hand and angled my face toward her.
Her bright blue eyes squinted at me as if trying to figure me out. “Besides, your mother showing up you didn’t seem like yourself today. Certainly less focused.” She gestured to the abandoned eggplant on the other side of the garden.
“Just distracted is all.” I sighed and dragged a hand through my hair.
“Thinking about Chess?”
“No!” I snapped and then frowned at the knowing look she gave me at my quick response. “I mean, not really. It’s a lot of things.” Mainly Chess. “Why should I care about him anyways? He certainly doesn’t care about me.”
“You can’t just leave him there.” Alice placed her hand on my arm, and I shrugged it off to stare hard at the ground.
It wasn’t that I didn’t want to save Chess. I did. My heart hurt just thinking about anything bad happening to him, but there was also another part of me that still ached from the words he had said.
Flattered. He had been flattered that I loved him. I was a good friend. Thinking about the words made my anger ignite all over again.
Had I been just some kind of sick game for him? See how long it took to get the Seelie Princess to fall for him before ripping her insides out and smashing them on the floor? If any other guy had done that to me I would say fuck them and be on my merry way, but the Bandersnatch…
“What exactly is the Bandersnatch?” I glanced at Alice out of the corner of my eye. “You said it’s a place, right? What kind of place? And how is it in my mother’s bedroom?”
“The how I can’t help you with but the what…” She trailed off. “Well I don’t really know what it is exactly either.”
“Then how do you know anything about it to begin with? Carroll couldn’t have made it all up in his head if he hadn’t have heard at least part of it from you,” I pointed out.
Alice stood from the stairs and began to pace. With her hands behind her back, her plaited blonde hair swung with every step she took. The dark charcoal of her pants and her light blue blouse made her seem like she had just come out of a business meeting and was ready to head back at any moment. It was weird how she had so easily let herself merge with the human world when she finally got out of her shell. Better than me for sure.
“Alice?” I stood up and placed a hand on her arm, halting her pacing. “What is it?”
She glanced up at me with sadness in her eyes. “I told Carroll of the Bandersnatch, it’s true, but I was only trying to sound important. Like my adventures were more fantastical than they were. So, I may have told a fib or two to make him think the Bandersnatch was a creature, when I really don’t know anything about it at all.”
My brow scrunched down in confusion. “Then where did you even hear about it if you don’t know anything about it? How do you know it’s a place and not a creature?”
“The where I just learned from the group. But how I knew before?” She paused; several emotions crossed her face at once. I almost thought she wasn’t going to answer before she began again.
“I really shouldn’t. It’s not my story to tell.” The blonde chewed on her lip in an unladylike fashion that was out of character for her. “He would be so cross with me if I went back on my word. No I must, I can’t, but you should know.” She nodded her head at me; her train of thought seemed to be spiraling down a hole. “You really should. Maybe he could tell you then he would forgive me for even saying anything at all? But would he even want to see me?” She began pacing again, her hands reaching up to touch her hair. “I don’t look like myself anymore, would he even recognize me?”
I grabbed a hold of her shoulders and turned her toward me. “Who Alice? Who?”
The blue of her eyes glistened as unshed tears threatened to fall. The anguish on her face was so heartbreaking I wished I hadn’t asked. But I had to know.
When she finally answered me it was in a voice so quiet that I had to strain to hear her.
“Hatter.”
Chapter 3
Alice’s Heart
SITTING ON THE couch next to Alice in the living room, I pushed the box of Kleenex toward her. One thing I had learned about having the ex-human as a roommate was she was over dramatic and a bit emotional. With the way she was looking now, without even saying anything, meant crying was inevitable.
“Take a deep breath, it will make it easier.” I patted the blonde on the back, trying my best to be comforting. I was getting tired of being the comforter; I wanted a bit of sympathy too. I was the one who was doomed.
“All right.” Alice hiccupped and breathed in deep before letting it out. She turned to me with a small, wilting smile. “I think I’m ready to talk about it now.”
“Good. So about the Bandersnatch,” I started in.
“Oh no. I cannot tell you about that until you hear the whole story.” Alice shook her head at me.
“The whole story?”
“Yes. How I came to the Underground in the first place. If you don’t know how Hatter was before, you won’t understand how he is now.” Anguish filled her voice, and it made my heart hurt for her and Hatter. She clearly cared for him, even if she hadn’t said as much.
“But didn’t you tell Carroll your whole story? I’ve already read the book and so have you.” I gestured to the book that was sitting on the coffee table in front of us.
When Alice first came to live with me I had been skeptical that she would be able to deal with being back in the human world. But she had surprised me time and time again. First with her weird obsession with reality shows, and then the one eighty she did when the fleeing Fae needed guidance. She didn’t hesitate to step up and take charge. Sometimes I felt like she would be better off being the princess than I ever would be.
“Yes, I know all that. But like with the Bandersnatch, I didn’t exactly tell the whole truth.” She flipped her hair over her shoulder and her lips quirked up in a mischievous smile. “A woman has to have her secrets.”
“Okay.” My eyebrows rose at her statement, I wasn’t sure I really wanted to know what really happened when she went to the Underground, but I didn’t think I would be able to get the information I needed if I didn’t let her do it her way. “So, what happened then?”
Alice sat up straighter on the couch and placed her hand primly in her lap as if she hadn’t been torn to pieces at the thought of telling Hatter’s secret. Being Fae had certainly made her more than a little mad.
“So, it is true that I fell down a rabbit hole chasing after a rabbit in a waistcoat. Of course, that didn’t happen here where your hole is but over in England.” She placed a finger up to her chin, tapping it. “And he wasn’t really a rabbit now that I think about it but more like our friend Trip. He said his name was Watch, but I never did find out why he was named that. Do you suppose he is related to Trip?” She glanced at me in question. “Maybe we could ask him next time he comes by?”
“Maybe,” I said simply not wanting to get too far off topic. “So, how old were you when you went to the Underground the first time?” I drew on my old memories, trying to place when I’d seen Alice before. “I think I only met you once or twice, and both times you were a different age, and the last time…” I trailed off not wanting to bring up old mistakes.
More polite than I could ever be, Alice ignored my reference and answered, “Ten, if I remember correctly. I had just snuck away from my nanny because she was being horrid. Who wants to spend the day learning arithmetic’s when the weather was so lovely?”
“The thought,” I agreed, letting my sarcasm bleed into my voice. I wouldn’t need the weather as an excuse not to do math. The fact that I breathed air was reason enough for me.
“Exactly.” She nodded her head. “So, you know the part about falling down the hole bit, and then the talking doorknob I made up, because really, how boring is it that there is a reception desk to the Underground?” Alice snorted, and I couldn’t really argue with her.
The doors to the Undergroun
d sat in a world between worlds which was given the uncreative name of the Between. There you must sign in with Type and Gripe, the two-headed grumpy sisters that could quite literally bite your head off. There were even keys issued to those who wished to travel between worlds. It was all very civilized and modern, but nowadays it looked more like a battlefield than a way station.
The thought of the destroyed doors and what was left of the reception desk caused a shiver to slide down my spine. I wasn’t looking forward to seeing the creatures behind that destruction again.
“So, the reception became a talking door. What else?” I sat back in my seat; I had a feeling this was going to take a while.
“Well, unlike the story I spun to Carroll, I actually ended up getting into the Underground by a talent that I’m not very proud of.” She blushed and looked down at her clasped hands.
“What?” I sat up now, actually getting interested in her story.
“Pickpocketing,” she muttered and blushed deeper. “I stole the key from the sisters all right. It was low and unkind, but they kept going on and on about needing a key and needing to sign in, so I just did it.”
I couldn’t help the little giggle that came out of me at her confession. Pickpocketing. Alice? It was hard to believe the prim and proper woman before me could do anything as childish as picking someone’s pocket.
“It’s not funny.” Alice crossed her arms over her chest and pouted. “I’ve felt guilty about it ever since it happened, and I had hoped to apologize to the sisters and return their key, but you never gave it back to me, and now they are missing too!” She shot me a nasty look.
“Don’t blame me.” I pointed at my chest with a shake of my head. “I didn’t lose the key, the dumb tree took it from me. I passed out and when I woke up, I was in the Seelie Palace; the key nowhere in sight.”
Alice frowned, her brow scrunching together in thought. “I wonder where it went then.”
