There is still so much he wants to know about me. Still so much I should share with him. I wish things were like they were before and I could just show up with a dozen flavors of Jell-O and two plastic spoons. How I long for those days. Before I made the biggest mistake of my life.
Kyle’s bedroom door slams shut.
Feeling a bit defeated, I walk over and look at the trashcan, the little slip of paper having fallen off his plate, coming to rest on the floor next to it. I pick it up and read it.
‘Everything happens for a reason.’
Chapter Forty-one
I hug everyone as they pile into Kyle’s apartment. Charlie, Mallory, Baylor, Skylar and Piper have all come over to ‘keep me company’ while Kyle is at work and Caden goes to a late meeting. Seems I’m not even on bedrest anymore yet I still need babysitting.
I’m not complaining though, I’ve missed them all so much. Mallory even brought her daughter, Kiera, who is three weeks younger than Ellie. We sit them on a soft blanket next to the couch as I catch everyone up on my life.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you any of this when we talked on the phone earlier,” I say to Baylor after I tell them everything. “But I just didn’t have the energy to talk about it more than absolutely necessary.”
“Are you kidding?” she says. “I completely understand, Elizabeth. I mean, Alexa. Oh, wow, that is going to take some getting used to.”
“Please call me Lexi,” I say.
“So you’ve been running and on your own for over a year?” Skylar asks, her head shaking in anger over what I told them about Grant.
“Just about thirteen months,” I say.
“And you supported yourself with no identification, no address and no bank account?” Mallory asks.
“Well, I did some odd jobs before Ellie was born. Walking dogs, cleaning apartments, but after she came along, there was no way for me to work.”
“Is that why you came back?” Charlie asks. “You ran out of money?”
I shake my head. “Money was tight, but I was managing. I had sold some jewelry and I was babysitting for some of the moms I met at Mommy and Me.”
“Then why come back? Especially if you think he knows you are in New York?” Baylor asks.
I don’t even realize it when I look over at Kyle’s bedroom.
“Oh, my God!” Baylor squeals. “You’re in love with him!”
“I knew it!” Mallory yells.
“You owe me ten bucks,” Skylar says to Piper.
My jaw drops in disbelief. “You bet on me?” I ask, watching Piper get out her wallet to make good on her bet.
Skylar laughs. “We all knew you and Kyle were right for each other. Even Piper. But she pegged you for a runner.”
I look at Piper and her eyes look sad as they hold mine. But what I see in them is something . . . familiar.
“I’m still running, you know,” I tell them. “I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to resume my identity. He could come after me. After Ellie. I can’t risk that.”
“Kyle will protect you. Those Stone brothers are very good at protecting the ones they love,” Baylor says.
“It’s not like that,” I tell them. “Kyle and I aren’t together. He’s letting us stay here for our safety, not because he wants to get together with me. I blew that chance when I walked out of the hospital six months ago.”
“That’s ridiculous,” Charlie says. “I see that man once a week at dinner. He may say he’s over you. He may even think he is. But the eyes never lie. He’s lost, Lexi. Those weeks you were in the hospital, he was a different person. He’s always been happy, but back then he was, I don’t know . . . glowing, for lack of a better word. I’d never seen him like that before and I’ve not seen him like that since. That is not a man who just wants to be friends with you. Believe me.”
“I appreciate your support and optimism,” I tell them. “I really do. But I can tell Kyle is still very hurt and guarded, even now that he knows my past. He’s helping me because that’s who he is—a nice guy who helps people. A doctor who wants to change the world. He’d do it for anyone. Heck, he did it for me before he even really knew me.”
Skylar elbows Piper. “Care to make another wager?”
Piper rolls her eyes at her sister.
“Regardless, I’ll bet Ethan can help you with your Grant problem,” Mallory says. “He has lots of connections. Maybe even at Chicago P.D.”
Baylor and Skylar and Mallory all try to convince me to let Ethan help, while Charlie and Piper look at me with sympathetic eyes.
“No,” I tell them in no uncertain terms. “I already told Kyle and Caden that I don’t want Grant contacted. There are just too many laws that protect those who shouldn’t be protected.”
“She’s right,” Charlie says, coming to my defense. “We all know scumbags get away with too much as it is. She can’t risk her daughter. Are we in agreement, girls?”
All five of them put their hands on top of one another’s. Then they look at me and nod to the top of their hand pile. I place my hand on top and it somehow feels like in doing so, I’ve become one of them. A sister of sorts. Someone they will protect.
I’ve always wanted a sister. Now I have five.
Tears spill down my cheeks.
Baylor hugs me. “It’s okay, Lexi. We’re here for you, whatever you need.”
I nod, wiping the wetness from my face. “Thank you. I don’t even know what to say.”
“Say you’ll be my assistant,” she says.
I look at her with drawn brows. “What? Surely you’ve filled the position by now.”
She laughs. “I did. And it was a horrible train wreck. The girl didn’t know a hyperbole from a simile. She lasted about six weeks before I realized I was spending more time telling her how to do her job than I was doing my job.”
I shake my head. “I can’t,” I say with resounding regret. “I can’t work as Alexa Lucas. He’ll find me if I do. And I can’t get paid as Elizabeth Smith—I have no identification. No bank account or social security number.”
“I don’t care about any of that,” Baylor says. “You are exactly the kind of person I need working for me. The way you discussed books with me in the hospital tells me you know your stuff. You have a degree in literature, so I’m assuming you know what hyperbole is without me having to gouge my eyes out trying to explain it to you.” She laughs at her own hyperbolic joke. “And you can work part-time from home, right here from Kyle’s apartment. I can messenger over everything. And when we need to have meetings, I can come to you. And paying you under the table won’t be a problem.”
“But that’s not fair to you,” I say, wanting so badly to accept her offer, but not willing to do it if she made it out of pity. “You wouldn’t be able to deduct my pay from your taxes.”
“Gah!” Piper bolts out. “Do you know how much money she makes writing sappy love stories? People eat that shit up, Lexi. She’s rolling in it.”
“Says the fiancée of the football star,” Baylor scolds her youngest sister. Then she turns back to me. “I also wouldn’t have to pay your social security or your medical and dental. It would save me a lot of paperwork. It’s a win-win situation. Will you at least think about it?”
I shake my head. “I don’t have to think about it,” I say.
She looks sadly at the other girls.
“I don’t have to think about it, because I’ll do it,” I say, smiling. “I’ll take the job.”
She shrieks and pulls me in for a hug. “You won’t regret it,” she says. “I’m an awesome boss.”
I laugh. “Sure. As long as I know a hyperbole, from . . . what was that other fancy word?” I joke.
“See?” she says. “You’re a smart ass like me. I think we’re going to get along just fine.”
“So, you have a place to live and a job,” Mallory says. “Now we just have to work on the man.”
I sigh in frustration. “The man who doesn’t want a relationship anymore?” I ask her
.
“Haven’t you learned by now that men don’t have the faintest clue about what’s best for them?” she asks.
I shrug. “Grant is the only man I’ve been with. I have no one else to compare to.”
“Well, take our word for it,” Skylar says. “They are clueless when it comes to matters of the heart. And sometimes we have to nudge their hearts in the right direction.”
“I—I don’t even know how to begin to do that,” I say.
Charlie laughs. “Ethan said Kyle was all frazzled when he called earlier. I’d say you know exactly how to do that.”
Before the girls leave, Charlie and Piper pull me aside. “We have some idea what you’ve been through,” Charlie says. “If you ever need to talk, you can call one of us. We’ve both been, uh . . . mistreated by men.”
I shake my head in sadness. “I’m sorry,” I say.
“We’re good now,” Piper assures me. “And you will be, too. We just didn’t want you thinking you were alone in this. Really, anytime, day or night.”
“Thank you. That means a lot to me.”
Once they leave and I get Ellie to bed, I sit and stare at the ‘fortune’ Kyle tried to throw away earlier. Then I think about what Skylar said about men needing a nudge in the right direction.
I send Skylar a text, hoping an offer I never took her up on six months ago still stands.
Chapter Forty-two
I stir my eggs nonchalantly when Kyle walks in the door after his thirty-six-hour shift. He must be exhausted and wanting to sleep, but he doesn’t get two feet into the kitchen before he stops dead in his tracks.
I pretend like I don’t notice his reaction. Like I don’t see his eyes take in my legs—legs that are bare from thigh to toe because I still have on nothing but my sleeping shirt—the one that barely covers my ass cheeks.
I pretend like I don’t notice how he’s checking out my new hair—hair that I let Skylar’s stylist return to my natural brown color. Hair that isn’t as short as when I was laid up in the hospital. It’s grown out from chin-length into longer, flowing waves.
I love my naturally wavy hair. Always have. But Grant insisted I keep it super long and stick-straight, like one of those high-priced runway models. I’m pretty sure I’ll never own a flat-iron again. My hand instinctively runs along the inner flesh of my right forearm as I remember how he once punished me with the hot appliance.
I shake off the memory and go about popping some bread into the toaster as if Kyle is not devouring me with his eyes.
“Oh, hi, Kyle,” I say, as if I’m just now realizing he’s standing there. “Would you like some breakfast?”
He finally tears his eyes from me. “No, thanks. I grabbed a bagel at the hospital.” Then he laughs. “You’ll never guess who I treated today,” he says.
“Let me guess,” I say. “POTUS?”
He looks at me in question.
“The President of the United States,” I clarify.
“Oh,” he says, with a chuckle. “No, not POTUS.”
“The Pope?” I ask. “Oh, wait! Was it Liam Hemsworth? I heard he was in town.”
He shakes his head and rolls his eyes. “Nope. I treated Elizabeth Smith.”
“Really?” I look over at him, amused.
“She was very old,” he says. “While I was treating her, she told me that at one point, her name was the most common name for a woman in America, with both Elizabeth and Smith topping the charts.”
“She’s right. Elizabeth battles with Mary, Patricia, and Barbara for the top spot depending on the year.”
“That’s why you chose it,” he says knowingly. “A common name that couldn’t be traced.”
I nod.
“Smart move,” he says. “Some women would have chosen differently. A unique name that maybe they wanted as a child, or some heroine they read about in a book.”
“I wanted to be invisible,” I tell him.
“You could never be invisible, Lexi,” he says, with a conflicted look on his face.
I walk back over to the stove to check on the eggs when I feel him come up behind me. He touches a lock of my hair, and even though hair doesn’t have nerve endings, I swear I can feel it all the way to my toes.
“You shouldn’t leave the apartment,” he says, concern lacing the deep cadence of his voice. “Not until we have a plan in place for your safety.”
I turn around, putting our chests inches from each other. I look up at him. “I didn’t leave. Skylar’s hair stylist came here to the apartment.”
“Good,” he says, looking relieved. He brushes a stray hair out of my eyes, but then pulls his finger away like touching me has burned him. He takes a step back, putting distance between us.
I reach over and grab a slip of paper off the counter. It’s the fortune from the other night that reads ‘Everything happens for a reason.’ The one he tried to throw away. “Here,” I say, handing it to him. “You dropped this the other day on your way out. It’s bad luck to throw away a good fortune.”
He silently reads it to himself, then he looks at me. I know we’re both thinking of one of the first conversations we ever had.
I point to the fortune. “I asked you once if you thought everything we go through is a way of getting us where we need to be. Do you remember?”
He nods.
“Do you remember your answer?” I ask him.
He nods again, slipping the fortune into his pocket before he walks away. “I’m going to hit the sack. I’ll probably sleep most of the day. I had a busy few nights.”
“I’ll try to keep quiet,” I tell him, guiltily looking over at Ellie, who is banging a toy on her highchair.
He laughs, walking over to her. “Don’t worry about it. I can pretty much sleep through anything.” Then he leans down and gives my daughter a kiss on the top of her head.
I’m jealous. I’m jealous of my own child. I want to be the recipient of his kisses.
He walks through the living room towards his bedroom as I pull my eggs off the stove and slide them onto a plate. When I turn back around to join Ellie at the kitchen table, I see Kyle standing in his doorway, staring at me again.
“I like the brown,” he says. “You looked good as a blonde. You even pulled off the red, which not many women can do. But brown is definitely your color.”
I smile as I place my plate on the table. And before he closes his door, I could swear I hear him let out a big sigh as he quietly says, “And mine.”
Chapter Forty-three
“What is that incredible smell?” Kyle asks, emerging from his bedroom almost nine hours later.
I put down the picture book I was reading to Ellie.
“Lasagna,” I tell him. “I thought you might want a home-cooked meal after eating hospital food for two days. You had all the ingredients. I hope it’s okay.”
“You don’t have to cook for me, Lexi. I don’t expect you to do anything.”
“I know you don’t. That’s why I wanted to do it.” I trace an invisible line on the couch.
He walks over and sits in the chair next to us. “Did he expect you to?” he asks.
“Yeah.” I nod sadly. “He expected a lot of things.”
“Shit, Lex,” he says, shaking his head in anger. Then he looks guiltily at Ellie, who is watching him. “Sorry, I shouldn’t cuss in front of her.”
I raise my eyebrows at him.
“I know she can’t hear me,” he says. “But she will eventually learn to read lips, so I shouldn’t get into the habit.”
Eventually. I try to hide my smile. He thinks we’ll still be here eventually—whenever that may be.
“So, what are you doing?” He nods to the book. “Reading?”
“She loves this book about dogs and cats. I read it to her every day and teach her the signs.”
He looks into the kitchen. “How long before dinner is ready?” he asks.
“About an hour.”
“That should be long enough for my first lesso
n.” He gets up from his chair and joins us on the couch. “So, teach me. Teach me how to sign dog and cat.” Then he smiles at Ellie. “Mommy,” he says to her as he taps his thumb to his chin while touching my shoulder.
Him teaching Ellie ‘mommy’ has become the highlight of my day. It’s the only time I get to feel his touch. And I find myself hoping it takes her a long time to learn that particular word.
I point to the picture of the dog in the book and then I pat my hip as if calling a dog. “Dog,” I say as I sign. I point back to the picture and repeat the motion.
Then I point to the cat as I say the word and pinch my thumb and index finger together next to my cheek and bring it out like I’m teasing my whiskers straight.
Kyle points to the pictures and does the signs. Ellie likes it when he does that.
“So, give me the basics,” Kyle says. “But start me off slowly.”
“Okay,” I say, putting Ellie on the floor next to some of her toys. “ASL is kind of like shorthand writing. All the concepts are there, but not every word is signed. Signing is slower than speaking, so unnecessary words like ‘a,’ ‘an,’ and ‘the’ are not used. There are thousands of word signs, but not all words have signs. Those you fingerspell. Also, nouns tend to come before adjectives because in a visual language, it makes more sense to give details after you have an idea about the subject.”
He nods to the cover of Ellie’s book. “So, you would sign ‘dog’ ‘brown’ and ‘bark’ to say ‘the brown dog is barking’?”
I smile. “You’re a fast learner, Dr. Stone. That is exactly right.”
“Do I get a gold star from the teacher?” he asks.
“Yes,” I say, as I nod my fist up and down to sign the word.
“Another thing that’s very important in ASL is the use of facial expressions and body movements. To ask a spoken question, you would raise the pitch of your voice. Using ASL, you’ll raise your eyebrows, or widen your eyes, otherwise someone might think it’s a statement. As in ‘want coffee’,” —I do the signs without any facial expression— “as opposed to ‘want coffee’?” —I do the signs and raise my eyebrows. “The first time I signed it, you might think I wanted coffee, but the second time, you would know I was asking if you wanted coffee.”
The Stone Brothers: A Complete Romance Series (3-Book Box Set) Page 81
