by Diane Leyne
Mike just started pulling clothes out of the dresser until he realized that Kris was hitting him on the arm.
“What the hell are you doing?”
“Packing her stuff. That’s what you came for, didn’t you? So she wouldn’t have to?”
“I’d love to clear out all of her stuff, but I don’t think that’s what she wants or needs right now. I’m just going to take enough for her to use for a few days. She needs some space.”
Mike looked at Kris.
“Why are you saying this? Are you trying to get us back together to get her away from Brad?”
“No,” she snorted. “Unlike you, I trust the man I love. She’s welcome to stay with us as long as she needs or for three more nights because that’s when we are going back to Seattle. And if she decides she’s done with you two, she’s more than welcome to come back to the city with us. She can even stay in my old apartment while she gets settled.”
“That’s really nice of you, Kris. We’d be happy to have someone looking out for her.”
“Of course, guys, you realize that my old apartment is just downstairs from where Damon, Brad, and I live now, in the duplex that Damon owns. She’d see Brad every single day.”
Mike felt his stomach flip-flop. He thought he might be sick. He sat down on the bed abruptly and nearly slipped off the edge because he wasn’t paying attention.
“Hah. Got your attention, finally, didn’t I?”
“Yeah, rub it in some more, why don’t you. We’ve lost her.”
“You will only lose her if you give up you two big fucking idiots.” Kris was blazingly mad, Mike realized. He looked over at Mal, who was also astonished. “She’s a wonderful woman, and only an idiot, or rather you two idiots, wouldn’t see how much she loves you both. And you couldn’t have found a better way to drive her away if you tried.”
“But what do we do? We love her, too, and want her back.” Mike dropped to his knees. “Please, Kris. Have pity on two idiots.”
Mal dropped down beside him. “Please.”
Kris leaned back and laughed. “I’m a sub. This is a new experience for me.” She finished packing some clothes from the dresser and then went into the bathroom presumably to collect Rebecca’s toothbrush and other personal items. When she came out, Mike and Mal were still kneeling, waiting for her.
Mike thought he saw a thawing in her expression.
“Please, Kris. We’ll do anything.”
She thought for a moment. “Okay, if you are truly sorry and want Rebecca back and are willing to work hard to ensure that you never do anything so stupid again…?”
Chapter Eighteen
Rebecca stood on the veranda of Brad’s cabin. She’d spend the last three days there, passing the time swimming and relaxing with Kris, working out with Brad, and long hours talking with Damon about what she felt and what she wanted. The only other person she’d spent time with was Caleb, and that was in a professional capacity. He wasn’t a therapist, but he was a doctor, a good one, and he wanted to make sure she had no physical injuries beyond a few bruises. He also prescribed a sleeping pill for a few days to help her get some rest if she needed it, but his main prescription was exercise to tire out her body and talk therapy with Damon to clear her mind. He was there, too, if she needed him, as a doctor or just as someone neutral to talk to. She was grateful. He was kind and intelligent and a gentleman when he wasn’t whipping subs’ asses in the playroom. She wondered idly if her friend Jen might like him and made a mental note to revisit the subject at a later time.
She only went up to the main building for the occasional meal, preferring to eat at the cabin whenever she could. She didn’t want to see Mal or Mike just yet, so she avoided any place she thought they’d be. Unfortunately, their cabins were close together, but she quickly realized that they had moved out and were staying in the staff quarters. She wasn’t sure if they were being sensitive of her feelings or if they didn’t want to see her any more.
With them out of the cabin, she’d offered to move back in, but Damon went all Dom on her and ordered her to stay. She’d felt so guilty about hanging around the cabin at first, but he’d reassured her. Damon, Brad, and Kris were supposed to be having a romantic getaway, and they were stuck with an intruder. She wanted to leave, but they assured her that she was welcome, especially Damon who seemed to take her under his wing. And it was good for her to see their interaction. Damon was clearly in charge, but he topped with love, and the three of them were so happy. Rebecca expected to feel jealous, but she didn’t. What they had was special. She did envy them though. She’d thought she had a chance for that type of relationship with Mal and Mike, but now she was rethinking everything.
Luckily, Damon’s specialty was psychology. Their long conversations helped her put everything in perspective. She hadn’t slept well the first few nights, but the third night, she was at peace. She knew what she wanted, and after talking to Damon, she thought she knew how to get it. That was out of her control, but she knew that if she didn’t try, she’d always regret it.
* * * *
Rebecca made her way down to the docks with Kris while Damon and Brad dealt with the luggage. She could see Mal and Mike waiting along with Joshua and Jillian. It seemed that they were piloting today. Most of the guests had already left. Once the boat left today, it would just be staff until the first paying customers arrived in ten days.
Mal and Mike silently loaded the luggage and then turned to help the passengers board. Jillian and Kris went first. Then it was Rebecca’s turn. Each of the brothers took one of her hands and helped her board before turning to the men who boarded without help.
Brad quickly led Rebecca to the interior cabin, followed by Kris and Jillian. He hugged her tightly to him, as the boat soon started moving.
Rebecca found her eyes were blurred with unshed tears, and hugged Brad tightly.
All too soon, they arrived in St. Maarten. JJ was at the dock with a cart waiting to load the luggage. Mal and Mike unloaded it and helped the passengers off one by one until just Rebecca and Brad remained.
They turned to her, their body language reluctant, their eyes sad. Rebecca looked from one brother to the other and then turned and walked back into the cabin and shut the door behind her.
* * * *
“What the hell?” Mal turned to his brother, who looked just as shocked and then to Brad. “Do you know what’s going on?”
“Of course I know what’s going on, and I can’t say I approved. But apparently she still loves you two idiots and is willing to give you another chance if you can prove you deserve it. I’m not convinced you do.”
Mal found himself quailing under Brad’s withering gaze. He wasn’t convinced he deserved another chance either.
“But…” he started but didn’t know what to say. He looked over to Mike who seemed to be equally dumfounded.
“But I tried to convince her to come back to Seattle with us, but my Master had several long conversations with her and is convinced that she needs to see this through. But understand this, you two dickwads. Hurt her again and I have his permission to come back down here with several of my largest firefighter friends, and we will pummel you two into the ground.”
“If we hurt her again, we’ll deserve it.” Mal’s voice was low and earnest. “We never meant to hurt her. We were stupid and didn’t take care of the precious gift she gave us. We’ll never ever make that mistake ever.”
“Yeah, Brad. Mal and I have had several long conversations of our own with Dr. McClain. He helped us understand what we did and why. We were dickwads, and if we do anything so stupid again, we’ll deserve a pummelling.”
Brad looked at Mal and Mike. Mal could see that he was still hesitating, unsure if he was doing the right thing by leaving her with them, but whatever he saw in their eyes seemed to help him make up his mind.
“Good. We’re on the same page. Take good care of her, she deserves it.”
Mike and Mal grabbed his hands, shaking them ha
rd.
“We won’t let you down. We won’t let her down, ever again. We promise.”
Brad turned and walked away from them. Once before he climbed the ladder down to the dock, he stopped and turned back to them.
“See that you don’t. She’s pretty special, and she deserves better than you two. On your way back to the island, you are going to make a detour. You are going to head back to that beach you guys apparently spent some time on the day that Rebecca arrived. In the cabin where Rebecca is currently residing, you’ll find that a large cooler and a toy bag. Go back to the beginning and start over while you have the chance.
“Now get out of my sight. Take her back to the beach and throw yourselves at her feet and beg forgiveness.”
Brad turned and walked away. Mal didn’t even notice him leave as he blinked back the tears. Maybe it wasn’t too late.
“Mike, oh my god, Mike. We have another chance.”
“Fuck, Mal, we aren’t going to screw this up again. We can’t!”
* * * *
Rebecca stayed in the cabin until she heard the engine start, her stomach churning. She didn’t know if she was doing the right thing. Sometimes love wasn’t enough, but talking to Damon had helped her feel good about her decision. She wasn’t ready to give up on their relationship. But she wouldn’t be a pushover either, even if she was going to submit to both of them.
Moving quickly so she couldn’t change her mind, she stripped down to her bikini, the same one she’d worn that first day, and then she waited. It didn’t take long for the engine to stop again. She looked out of the cabin window and saw that they were moored in almost the exact same spot as they had been back on her first day on the island.
She took a deep breath. Now or never.
She opened the door and came out, walking right past Mal and Mike who stood silently watching her as she walked over to the ladder and lowered herself into the water. Striking out strongly, and not looking to see if they were following, she swam carefully toward the shore, her heart beating a mile a minute, and not because of the physical exertion.
Rebecca forced herself to look toward her destination, stroking evenly through the water and resisting the urge to look back to see if Mal and Mike were following. Worst case, she was stranded on the side of the island and she’d spend a few hours walking back to the resort. Best case, they were right behind her.
Soon she could feel the sand under her feet as it got to shallow to swim. She waded toward shore, still not looking back. Moving carefully, she walked onto the beach and stood waiting for a second, afraid to turn around. What if they’d left?
At first she couldn’t see them, and her heart skipped a beat. But then a cloud passed in front of the sun and the glare was gone, and she could see them in the water, towing the cooler on a raft. It was almost like the first time, but instead of Mike waiting on shore while she and Mal towed the raft, this time, the brothers were swimming it in.
Trying to seem casual, she walked over to a cluster of rocks at the water’s edge and gingerly sat down to wait. Silently, she watched them wade to shore, hauling the cooler and raft with them. They glanced her way and then carried it up to the same shaded spot they used last time.
Like last time, Mike had the toy bag slung across his shoulders, but unlike last time, she’d been the one to pack it. It was sealed, too, with plastic zip ties in case Mike or Mal wanted to peek. She was in charge this time. Damon had helped remind her of something that Mal had told her when they first started playing together. The Dom set the rules, but it was the sub that sets the limits, and it was now her time to do just that.
She looked over at the men. They were setting up the same way they did before. They had the blanket spread and were organizing the food. When they appeared to be ready, she stood and walked slowly over to them. They both scrambled to their feet when they saw her, but they didn’t speak. They were waiting, their faces uncertain.
* * * *
Mal watched Rebecca’s slow approach. Brad had given them hope, and seeing the toy bag, hope had risen further inside him, but until she accepted them back, they wouldn’t relax or take anything for granted. He watched her body language. She seemed tense and was walking stiffly. A little of his hope ebbed away. Maybe this was her way of saying good-bye?
She looked so beautiful in her blue bikini. She hadn’t worn it again since there first time together. The resort had its own clothing, and she’d always worn that, and the light green had looked good on her, but this rich blue, almost the same color as the sky, was her best color. That was why he’d bought her the dress for the final night that had gone so terribly wrong. And when she’d come out of that bedroom wearing it, his heart and his dick had soared. She looked beautiful in it, and he wanted so much to sink into her body and beg her forgiveness.
He watched her approach. When she got close, she paused, uncertainty on her face. But Mal and his brother had no uncertainty. In unison, they dropped to their knees, assuming the submissive pose, their knees spread, their hands behind their backs and their heads bowed, waiting for Rebecca to say something.
She approached closer.
“Why should I take you back?”
That was one of the things he loved about Rebecca. No beating around the bush, no coyness, not prevarication, just straight to the point.
“We don’t deserve to have you take us back, but it is what we want, above all else. We understand if you can’t forgive us right away, but if you give us a chance, we’ll try to earn back your trust.”
“What he said,” agreed Mike. “You are too good for us, but that doesn’t mean we don’t desperately want you to take us back and let us prove that we can be worthy of your submission.”
“What have you learned?”
“For all of our talk about open communication and how a sub needs to share their feelings with their Dom, that equally applies to the Dom.” Mal had to clear his throat before he could continue. “We…I couldn’t stop thinking about that stupid arrangement we made up front. The purpose was so that we didn’t scare you off, but the deadline of renegotiating the relationship after the inspection actually made me feel more insecure than I ever have in my life. As the clock ticked, all I could think of was what would I do if you decided not to continue to belong to us. And then you got close to Brad, and my insecurities and jealousy took over. I’m ashamed of my behavior. I talked about trust and communication, and I behaved like a jealous dick.”
“Yes you did. What about you, Mike?”
“Yup. Mal was a jealous dick.” His shoulders sagged. “And so was I. I knew Brad was a nice guy. I knew he was in a committed relationship, but when Mal told me of his worries, I didn’t speak up. I was happy to help him get Brad away from you because I didn’t want you touching another man or another man touching you.”
“Then how do you explain throwing Holtzman at me at every turn. He’s a particularly loathsome man, but he is a man. And you two kept putting me in the position of touching him and letting him touch me.”
“That’s because you clearly hated touching him. I think unconsciously, I wanted to make sure that you hated touching all other men but us.”
“Are you crazy, Mal?” Mal felt the color rise in his cheeks. He was ashamed of himself and would rather just forget about what he did, but he knew that he had to address things if they were going to move on.
“Maybe. Crazy with love and crazy with jealousy. We didn’t have a commitment, and it was eating at me until I couldn’t think of anything else but getting you away from any man who might be a threat to our ongoing relationship.”
“But even if I agree to continue as your sub, you know there’s a time limit. Once I finish my thesis, I’m going to be looking for a job back in the States. In fact, that’s been puzzling me. On one hand, you profess to want to continue a relationship, but on the other hand, you kept encouraging me to finish my thesis, which is one thing guaranteed to split us up.”
“Your thesis meant a lot to you, so
it meant a lot to us.” Mal looked at Mike. The words were simple, and Mike spoke for both of them. Their woman was going to get a doctorate. They were so proud of her.
“And if you are willing to try again…” Mal found that he was terrified. What if she rejected them? He looked over to Mike who smiled his encouragement. Mal cleared his throat again. “If you are willing to forgive us and let us work to regain your trust, there doesn’t have to be an expiry date. We’ve been talking, not just recently, but last week before the visitors arrived. We were thinking that once you get a teaching job, we could move with you and we’d set up the household and look after things for you so you wouldn’t have to worry about anything. We’d look after the cooking and the cleaning and you. Maybe we could all buy a house together?
“And then in the summers, you could come here with us and be our sub here. If there was any way you could marry both of us, we’d do that in a second, but maybe you could marry one of us and wear the other’s collar? We’d even be interested in kids some day, as long as you are, too…” Mal’s voice was tentative, and he found himself trailing off as he tried to read her expression. He was terrified. Was he pushing too hard, too fast? He wanted her. They both wanted her so badly, but not on a temporary basis. She needed to understand that they wanted forever. House, white picket fence, 2.5 kids. They wanted it all and they wanted it with her.
He looked at her face, but she wasn’t giving anything away. She must be a hell of a poker player.
“What if I find a job in Seattle where Brad lives?” Her words made Mal wince.
“Then we’ll move there, and we’ll welcome him into our home.” Mike smiled tentatively at her. “Truthfully, if we weren’t so jealous, I think we would have liked him. We weren’t very fair to him either. He had your back when we didn’t. We actually owe him a lot. We apologized already, and he said he’s accepted it, but we promise we’ll make proper amends to him, too. Hell, he can even be best man if you ever get around to making honest men of us.”
