by Nixon, Diana
“No!”
I pulled my hand away quickly; she dropped to her knees, unable to keep on her own legs, and began to cry, hiding her face in the hands. Being in a deep confusion, I didn’t realize that all her feelings, just like my own, were gone. I didn’t see the light, I felt no warmth, I was in the darkness... Again. I realized that I had to do something to help Eileen, but I was powerless and I couldn’t reach her. An invisible wall grew between us, and I didn’t know how to break it. I didn’t see Eileen, I was blind, but she was there alone and I still knew she needed me.
Through the veil of a mist, I could hear Eileen crying. She said something quietly thought the tears.
“Christian!” she called. Just hearing my name, I was able to come to myself. I raised her exhausted body into my arms and quickly headed back for the campus.
All the way I saw tears rolling down her cheeks. I wanted to say something, but I couldn’t find the words. A complete surprise for me was the flow of her mixed emotions. Now I saw everything that had happened to her, as if we crossed some invisible boundary, beyond which we could feel each other again. I noticed that Eileen began to calm down and slowly come to herself. She was no longer crying, she looked at me with completely shocked eyes.
“What was that?” she asked with a horror on her face.
“I don’t know, Eileen, I don’t know,” I said, still holding her in my arms. I was scared to death.
I gently lowered her to the ground to make sure that she could stand and embraced her tightly.
Never in my life have I felt myself so weak and helpless. I couldn’t explain anything of what had happened on the lake. I didn’t know how to explain it to her. Eileen stood, leaning her whole body towards me, and trembling. She was frightened. I could feel it. She was confused, just like me. And I... I couldn’t and I didn’t know how to protect her.
“I want to sit down,” she said quietly.
“Of course.” I led her to the nearest bench.
“Eileen, can I ask you one question?” I said cautiously.
“What did I see on the lake?” she guessed.
“You saw something? Actually, I wanted to ask, why did you start to cry.”
“Because I saw her. A woman. She was standing beside me and holding my hand. Then you touched me, and an incredible pain ran through my body, and then... Then I began to see my own nightmare in reality. As she calls me, as I go into the depth of the lake, as you disappear. I'm calling you, feeling completely powerless, and you take me in your arms, but I'm so weak that I can’t say a word, and she doesn’t stop calling me...
Eileen's voice broke and tears started rolling again down her cheeks.
“Don’t, don’t say anything else,” I said, embracing her again. Without pulling away, Eileen continued: “I have a feeling that we were not supposed to be there together. As if that in itself, was wrong. And yet, I heard another voice.”
“What? You mean there was someone besides the woman?” moving away slightly to see her face, I asked.
“Yes. But that one belonged to a man. And he kept repeating the same thing: “He is your keeper, you are his power”. What does it mean Christian?”
“I wish I knew,” I said quietly. “Do you know what the strangest thing is? I haven’t seen or heard anything of what you were talking about. In general, I felt nothing. Once you started crying, I was like in a fog. And I couldn’t understand where I was until you had called my name.”
“Of course, she wouldn’t let you.”
“What do you mean, Eileen?” I frowned confused.
“She saw how you tried to take my hand, so with her other hand, she touched your face, and you lost the ability to see, to understand and even to feel anything.”
The more Eileen was saying, the more I couldn’t understand her words. No, of course, she still was speaking English, but it didn’t help me to come at least to some logical explanations.
“Are you saying that you saw and felt everything that the woman was doing?” I asked her.
“Yes. And even more, Christian. I also felt the emptiness that overwhelmed you.”
Chapter 12. Golden radiance (Eileen)
That night I couldn’t fall asleep. I really needed to get rest and find some strength for tomorrow's classes, but the sleep didn’t come. When Christian brought me into the room, we had a long talk about what had happened on the lake. Amanda wasn’t there, and nobody bothered us. We discussed all the feelings that were inside of us on the shore, but still couldn’t understand their origins. Wishing me good night, Christian went to his room. I could see from his face that leaving me alone was the last thing he wanted to do at that moment, but I really needed to stay alone for a while. And although I felt even worse after his leaving, I tried not to think about it.
Of all the things that happened that evening, the man's voice bothered me most. I had never heard it before. Despite that, the voice seemed very close and friendly. So close that I wanted to reach out a hand and touch it, as if someone was whispering into my ear. And though that voice, never ceasing, repeated exactly the same phrase, I liked its sounding - warm and soft, and calming. He inspired confidence - something I haven’t experienced in the last forty-eight hours. That reminded me of those feelings that were inside of me when Christian was near.
Hearing the rustle of the opening door, I didn’t turn around, pretending to be already asleep. Despite the fact that Amanda and I were very close and always talked about everything with each other, I didn’t want to discuss the events of the night.
Some time later I finally fell asleep.
Fortunately, I didn’t have any dreams, so when I woke up the next morning, I was quite surprised to feel well rested. Coming down for breakfast, I found Amanda, Christian and Anna sitting at the table.
“Morning, sleepyhead! I thought you had a day off,” Amanda said.
“No. My classes start later than yours,” I replied, catching Christian’s troubled look at me. A sleepless night hadn’t affected his appearance. He looked amazing. Well, as always. And I was a walking nightmare. Again. Apparently foreseeing the course of my thoughts, he smiled slightly and said:
“Is everything all right?”
Oh, for a millionth time already, I felt so stupid in his presence, so I just mumbled something like “It’s okay”.
“Your coffee,” he said, handing me a cup of hot drink. “I thought you wouldn’t refuse.”
“Thank you. Just what I needed,” I smiled, breathing a bracing aroma of coffee.
Watching us very precisely, Amanda finally decided to say:
“I can see that yesterday's meeting was a success,” she said, trying not to give us up to Anna.
In spite of that, Christian and I exchanged smiles and said “yes” together, after what there was another exchange of understanding glances.
“Yeah. So I thought,” giving us a knowing smile, she replied. “It's time for my classes, so let's talk about it later,” she said before leaving, deliberately emphasizing the last word and looking only at me. The interrogation under torture was coming and I already wanted to escape. Every time Amanda wanted to extort some secret she turned into a real beating up monster. And I was going to become her next sacrifice.
“I have to go too,” as if apologizing, said Christian.
“Wait a minute, I will go with you,” I jumped from my seat. “We have our classes with Evan in the training building.”
“Well, let’s go then.”
Out on the street and making sure that no one was around, Christian said:
“Are you really okay? No nightmares?”
“If there was something wrong, you would know about it first,” I said, enjoying that opportunity to have a few private minutes with him.
“I hope that.”
I raised my eyebrows questioningly.
“I mean I hope that such nightmares will no longer bother you,” he concluded. “But I don’t mind if you want to see me without any specific reason,” leaning close
r to me, he added. I just hoped he didn’t hear the sound of my beating heart ready to jump out of my chest hearing those words.
“All right,” laughing nervously, I replied. “I hope you didn’t forget that today we are going to the town?”
“Of course I didn’t. See you after classes then,” said Christian, giving me his mesmerizing smile. He left and I stayed on the porch, waiting for my mentor. I was wondering what a practice session he had planned for today. I didn’t have much time to think about it, when Evan came.
“Hey beautiful! How are you feeling today?” he asked, opening the door.
“The mood is not so good, but I hope the today's training will fix it.”
“I’m sure you'll like it. Today we’ll see the preparations of some students for the Festival’s show. Let's start, of course, from the faculty of Fairey.”
We came to the second floor and entered a large domed room that reminded me of a planetarium. All the walls and the ceiling were made of glass. Feeling the familiar warmth, I turned my head slightly to the right and saw Christian in the company of several other students. He apparently was too focused on something else to feel my presence, so he didn’t notice it when Evan and I took our seats in a distant corner of the room near the window.
“All the Fairey possess the power of fire, so now we'll see how the best of them can do that,” instructed Evan, folding his arms and spreading out his legs leisurely.
Christian came to the center of the room. He stood with his back to us and still didn’t know about my presence.
“There are also two more students near Christian who possess the power of water. They are here to guarantee his safety, as the trick with fire elements in his show is rather complicated and dangerous. I hope he won’t burn the whole building down,” smiling, commented Evan.
“I'm sure he’ll do everything just as it needs to be done,” not thinking about his reaction, I said.
“Do you know him?” Evan asked in surprise.
“Yes, I have been best friends with his sister Amanda, since school,” I explained indifferently.
I didn’t know whether it helped to reduce Evan’s surprise, because all my attention at the time was focused on Christian. He still stood with his back to us. Stretching his arms out before him, he began to turn his palms slightly in different directions. Watching closer, I noticed thin streams of fire, burning in his hands, like small brushes. And he was drawing with those brushes, in the literal sense of the word, a picture that was difficult to see well from my seat. I stood up and made a few steps toward Christian. Evan, according to the rustle behind, followed me. I was coming closer, until I saw what exactly Christian was drawing... Those were the most intricate golden lines from my dreams. Only in his performance, they seemed to be more transparent. They were swirling and interweaving in the air, making it crackle from the power of Christian’s fire. Some strange impulse hit me and I felt an incredible desire to join him. I was dying to feel his power and I wanted to add a new dimension to his picture.
“It needs more color,“ I thought to myself. But as soon as that thought formed clearly in my mind my hands themselves raised up in the direction of Christian’s patterns and began to repeat his own motions.
My heart was drowning in the ocean of pure delight and happiness. My veins were burning with the fire running through them and my hands were tingling with the unknown power I had never felt before. Even while standing with my eyes closed, I could clearly see our painting. The lace lines became brighter, filling the room with magical brilliance.
I smiled, feeling an indescribable joy. I didn’t know where that feeling came from, but it overwhelmed me like a river running over the banks. I felt incredibly good. I felt the warmth covering my hands, but it wasn’t painful, it was pleasant. I felt Christian’s powers complementing my own strength, and the flow of our energy filling my body with already familiar warmth.
I opened my eyes, and saw it - the beautiful golden pattern, spreading the entire space of the room from the floor to the ceiling, like a fine picture, on the other side of which stood Christian.
And he was smiling too. His arms were stretched out, palms up, just like mine. And we both just stood there and stared at each other, not understanding what was currently happening. But the feeling seemed to be so right… It was completely different from the way we both felt on the lake.
I let my hands down, but the pattern remained in its place. When Christian put his hands down too, the image disappeared.
“You already possess the power of fire, Eileen!” Evan exclaimed admiringly. “And not just possess, I would rather say – in perfection!” he added even more surprised. “To connect your energy to Christians’, you must at least be as strong as he is. And I've never seen a freshman with such a strong power!”
“Neither have I,” agreed Christian, coming to us. “Well done, Eileen. How did you do that?”
“I don’t know. I just wanted to try to do what you were doing.”
We didn’t mention however, where the idea of creating this particular picture came from. I didn’t say a word as well about how exactly I managed to do that. Thinking that there were too many unnecessary witnesses, I decided to tell Christian about all the details later. As if knowing what I was thinking about, he nodded quietly.
“Well, I think your presence here, Eileen, was a good beginning of your training,” he said aloud thoughtfully (or did I just imagine it?).
“Absolutely!” instead of me replied Evan, whom Christian, at the same time, gave a hard look (or did I just imagine that too?). “It's only our first practice lesson, and we have already learned about Eileen’s ability to possess the power of fire! What will happen when she visits the other training classes?..” asked Evan rhetorically.
At that moment I looked at Christian. His eyes were full of horror and his fear reflected in me, making my knees tremble. Oh. My. God. That's why he reacted so strangely on my first attempt to show the power - he was afraid that I could just as easily possess the power of other nature elements. Knowing how much strength and energy was needed to control at least one of them, he was horrified to imagine what could happen to me in such a rapid development of my abilities.
All the joy of our recent success disappeared without a trace. I sat on the nearest chair and tried to calm down. After all, possessing the power of fire wasn’t uncommon for Fairey. That didn’t mean that I would be just as easily able to operate with water or air, right? But the problem was that I wasn’t a Fairey in a usual meaning of the word. I didn’t have to make any effort to help Christian today. Could that mean something?..
“Eileen, are you okay?” Evan asked, sitting on a chair nearby.
“Yes. Just shocked a little. I didn’t expect something like this to happen to me,” I confessed.
“I know,” he nodded sympathetically. “I was once a beginner as well. All those new sensations and powers. You just need some time to get used to your talents. I think that’s enough for you for today. You’ve spent a lot of energy, so get a rest, and we’ll continue tomorrow,” he said, rising.
“Thank you,” I said, heading for the exit. “I really do need to rest.”
Hearing the announcement of a text message, I looked at the screen of my cell phone.
“I'll come as soon as possible”, I read the message from Christian. I didn’t bother to turn around so as not to attract too much attention. I knew that he didn’t need the answer. Christian knew perfectly well everything that was going on inside me at that moment.
Back in my room, I began to count the minutes before his coming. I thought that if I didn’t tell him everything, my brain would just explode. The phone screen lit up again, one more message came. This time, it was from my grandmother.
“My dear girl! I’m very glad that you are all right. Ms. Wilde told me everything. Hope we’ll discuss that soon. I'm coming back next week and will be able to visit you. See you there, sweetheart!”
That was, perhaps, the only good new
s over the past few days. I didn’t even want to think how much my grandmother knew from Alexis.
After half an hour someone knocked on the door. Thank God! Christian stood in the doorway.
“Tell me everything from the very beginning,” coming right down to business, he said.
After listening attentively to my rambling speech, he needed some time to comprehend the words he’d heard. He shook his head in disbelief and ran his hands through his perfectly messy hair.
“As soon as I felt the burst of new energy, Eileen, I knew that you had done it. It was exactly like in the dream. It was so easy to combine my energy with yours. I just knew that doing that was the right thing. I must say, it was quite weird.”
“I don’t know how it’s all connected, Christian, but there, on the lake, I felt something completely different, like being there with you was wrong in itself. I think I should go there alone and...”
“Don’t even think about it, Eileen!” in the blink of an eye coming next to me, said Christian. “Don’t you realize how dangerous it is?” he put both his hands on my shoulders.
“I know, Christian, but… Damn this stupid tingling!” I said irritably, rubbing my shoulder.
“What tingling?” he asked confused.
“It’s on my shoulder. I’ve had it for a long time, but it was more like a slight tickle before, now I feel real pain,” I said gloomily.
“Can I have a look?” holding out his hand, asked Christian.
“Sure,” I said. I turned my back to him, taking my hair away from the right shoulder. There was a moment of silence.
“Oh, my God!” in a barely audible voice he said, lightly touching the place where the pain was throbbing.
“Is it so awful?”I asked frowning.
“No, it's... amazing!” he said stunned. There wasn’t a shade of humor in his voice. He was dead serious, his eyes glitter with something mysterious.
