Her eyes were like golf balls. “Engaged? Wait, how long was I out again?”
“It’s not real,” I laughed, “we’re just pretending to be engaged to get me into a party. But never mind that, I can explain later. What about you? How do you feel?”
She propped up onto her elbow and pursed her lips. “I don’t know,” she said, her eyes darting around as though she was doing an internal inventory. “OK, I think.”
“Do you remember what happened yesterday?” I asked cautiously, hoping I didn’t incite a second wave of hysterics.
“I bonded,” she said in awe as though she was both remembering it and learning about it for the first time. “I bonded to Steven.”
“You did,” I smiled.
“I remember, but it feels different now.”
“The first day is the worst. From here on out, you should be OK.”
“Where are you going so early?” she asked, looking down to see that I was dressed.
“It’s not early,” I told her, “and I am going to grab some breakfast for both of us before it ends. Want anything special?”
Before she could answer, there was a knock at the door. Chloe threw the fluffy comforter over her head, and as soon as I saw she was hidden I opened the door.
“Bastian?” I stepped to the side so he could come in. “What are you doing here?”
“I am here to escort you to breakfast. After all, we’re engaged now; we can’t very well show up on our own. Good morning Chloe,” he added as she came out of hiding.
“Morning,” she said, trying desperately to tame her wild hair with her fingers as she slid on her pink robe and matching fuzzy slippers.
“We’ve been engaged for less than a day, it’s not like anyone knows yet,” I objected.
“Please tell me you’re joking?” I stared blankly at him. “Becca, I can all but assure you that there is barely a soul left on this entire estate that has not heard about the two of us by now. Gossip is sustenance around here, and when my mother is at the lead, it spreads faster than a spill on a rug.”
“Oh,” I said, not expecting the sudden rush of nerves. “Sure. Yeah, OK, that’s fine. No problem.”
“All right then, are you ready?” he asked, reaching for the door.
“Sure,” I nodded, fighting the butterflies that were chasing away my appetite. “Chloe, we’re going to go, will you be OK for a little while?”
“I’ll be fine. And don’t worry about bringing me food, I can just call down.”
“Actually,” Bastian said to me quietly, “I don’t believe Steven has had anything to eat yet this morning.”
The mischievous light in his eye caught fire in mine, and I gave him a quick nod. “Do it.”
Taking the cue, Bastian walked over to the phone and dialed. “Yes, hello,” he said very officially when the line was picked up. “I need to order the breakfast tray for two, please. Yes, this room. Thank you.”
“Thank you, but I’m not that hungry,” Chloe said as he hung up. It wasn’t until he picked up the phone and dialed again that she began to look worried. “Wait, what are you doing?” she asked, her eyes bouncing from Bastian to me and back again, “What is he doing? What are you doing?”
“Steven, it’s me…”
“No!” Chloe screamed under her breath, slapping both her hands over her mouth.
“…listen,” Bastian continued, fighting a smile, “I’m taking Becca over to breakfast, would you mind coming to her room and eating with her friend Chloe? She could use some company.”
“No,no,no,no,no!” Chloe continued to whimper.
“Great, thanks,” Bastian said, throwing me a grin. “Bye.”
He replaced the receiver in the console with a satisfied smile, while Chloe could only look on in horror. “I can’t believe you did that!” she said, or rather tried to say but her voice was so high it was barely audible. “And you,” she turned on me, “you let him do it! You knew what he was doing and you let him!”
“Sweetie, this is good,” I said, forbidding myself from laughing at her predicament… again. “You need someone to hang out with, and you are going to have to get to know him sooner or later.”
Her head shook in what looked like a nod, though it may have been more comprehension than actually acceptance. “Oh my gosh… oh my gosh… he’s coming here… right now… to see me…”
“He did say he needed to get ready, so you probably have a few minutes,” Bastian told her.
“Get ready?” her eyes widened. “I need to get ready!” Then without another word, sprinted into the bathroom and closed the door.
“We’ll leave you to it, then,” Bastian called after her.
“Yeah, good luck hon, have fun!”
“I’m still mad at you!” she yelled from behind the door, mumbling over what sounded like a toothbrush.
“Come on,” Bastian said, taking my arm and pulling me with him out the door. “She needs to do this on her own.”
“I know,” I said begrudgingly, knowing he was right, but still wanting to be there for her.
“They will be fine. And just to make sure, we can compare notes later after we talk to them,” he grinned.
“Speaking of talking to them,” I said, taking his arm as we walked down the hall toward the smells of warm bread and sausage. “I take it from your call that you haven’t yet told him about what happened?”
“Haven’t had the chance, but that is probably for the best. Better that they meet once or twice before he finds out. No need for them to both be nervous, the situation is stressful enough as it is.”
“You’re probably right.”
“And while we are on the subject of nerves and stress,” he segued casually, “are you sure you are all right?”
“I’m fine.”
“I can feel your hand shaking on my arm.”
Damn.
“It’s nothing,” I said, as each step we took toward the breakfast room made me more and more of a liar. “Just a little anxious. I mean I knew this would happen, obviously. I just… I don’t know… thought I’d have more time to ease into it. But I can handle it,” I added quickly, not wanting to lend any credence to Jocelyn’s hesitations the night before.
“You can handle it.”
“That’s what I said.”
“I know, but when I said it, I believed it. You only want to believe it.”
I scowled at the floor. “You really suck sometimes, you know that?”
“You are overthinking this,” he said, laughing off my jab. “It’s simple, give them what they expect. Do what they would do in your place. You have been watching them for almost a week now, you know what to expect from them, now reflect it back. Oh,” he stopped suddenly, reaching into his pocket, “almost forgot. You’ll need this,” he said pulling out an unmistakable velvet box and handing it to me.
I opened the lid and found a ring with the biggest diamond I had ever seen outside of a cartoon. “Please tell me that’s not real,” I said, already fairly certain it was.
“Not only is it real, it is a rose cut diamond that has been in my family since the middle of the sixteenth century.”
“Are you out of your mind, I’m not wearing this!” I shut the box and shoved it back at him.
“You have to; everyone knows this ring, they’ll expect to see it on you.”
“I don’t care, I’m not wearing something you could buy a small country with! What if I break it?”
“Break a diamond?” he cocked an eyebrow. “That would be impressive.”
“You know what I mean!”
Taking the box, he pulled my hand through his arm and continued leading me down the hall, removing the ring from its velvet compartment along the way. “This ring belongs to me now. It was given to me years ago by my mother so that I could bestow it on whatever lady was deemed fit to be my wife. Of course we both know that will never happen, but that’s not the reason you shouldn’t worry about it. As far as I am concerned, all this thing repre
sents is the expectation of my family and ideals of a life I have fought for years to separate myself from. The fact that having you wear it helps in a ruse actually gives it a purpose I can support. Don’t think of it as a priceless keepsake that you have to protect, think of it as a mask designed to help you fill the role they expect you to play.”
I still wasn’t happy about it, but given that I didn’t really have a choice, I nodded, and he slid the ring on my finger just as we stepped out into the open corridor that led directly into the breakfast room.
As the sounds of talking voices and clinking plates reached me, the butterflies that had been with me since Bastian arrived in my room turned to stones, sinking to my feet and making them drag. When the curious eyes of the dozen or so people talking outside the room began to turn and watch our approach, I had to tighten my grip on Bastian’s arm to keep from running.
He put his hand over mine reassuringly. “Easy,” he whispered in a tone only I could hear, “you can do this.”
“I don’t know,” I said, my voice shaking.
“I do. Keep your head up,” he instructed gently without looking at me or even moving his mouth, coaching me secretly as we walked. “Don’t shy away when they look at you; point your chin; pull your shoulders back; smile.” I let his words echo in my mind like a mantra, following each piece of advice to the letter. After a few minutes I started to feel the change in myself, slowly growing more comfortable under the cold judgmental eyes of those we passed. By the time we reached the entrance of the breakfast room, a few of those eyes even began to look at me with approval, and I realized that Bastian had been right; I could do this.
When we paused at the door, Bastian glanced down at me for the first time, his aloof public mask in place. “Shall we eat, my dear?” he asked, his eyes searching me carefully.
I lowered my eyelids slightly and raised my nose. “Of course,” I said, smiling up at him with a cool and haughty confidence that could rival his own.
A flash of laughter passed behind his eyes as he looked back out over the room. “Thattagirl,” he breathed with the glimpse of a smile, placing a hand on my back and leading me into the room.
The next two days of my life became about one thing: playing the part of Bastian’s fiancée. I’d been offended before, when Jocelyn had suggested that I might not be able to handle the role, but now I totally understand why he’d been worried.
It. Was. A. Lot.
Bastian and I were together almost constantly and spent most of our time in the public eye. There were meals, socials, casual gatherings, formal gatherings, outings, open events, and private events. Not to mention hordes of people to meet, dozens of names and titles to remember, and all the while keeping up the polished façade of a genuine Bhunaidh-in-training. I was exhausted.
But at least all my hard work wasn’t going unnoticed. Everyone was buying my act, from Bastian’s family, to the other Bhunaidh guests, to even the staff – though admittedly I was always nicer to them than I was supposed to be. Bastian was constantly complimenting my progress, assuring me that he himself hadn’t taken to “playing the game” as quickly as I had. Even Jocelyn seemed to approve of my performance.
The icing on the cake would have been the chance at an early meeting with the mysterious Mr Molony, though of course that would have been too easy for my luck to allow it. Had it been anyone else we were trying to see, we undoubtedly would have run into them during all our mixing and mingling, but not Molony. Apparently, he was known for making himself scarce, usually not even staying on the estate. Bastian didn’t expect him to make another appearance until the banquet, and after two days without so much as a sighting, it was starting to look like he was right.
And so, we waited.
Though if there was one person not at all unhappy about the prospect of passing the days at Adare, it was Chloe. She and Steven had become inseparable over the past few days, and I had never seen her happier. They spent nearly every waking hour together, which really wasn’t hard considering neither of them had anything else to do, and the change in them both was astonishing. In a matter of days, Chloe had gone from an over the top perky girl, into a joyous and refined woman. The change was subtle, but those of us who knew what it was like to have a bonded Anam, knew that it was just the gentle shift that came from having a greater purpose. And as for Steven, he was talking, smiling, and laughing so much that even his brother could hardly recognize him. Bastian was beside himself, constantly telling us that he hadn’t seen Steven that happy and carefree since they were kids. He finally had someone to love him exactly the way he was, and to a person who had never known the feeling, it was like opening your eyes for the first time. It was magic.
On the afternoon of the third day, I finally found myself with some alone time – having graciously opted out of a car tour of the countryside, citing my inclination to motion sickness – and was looking forward to spending some time with Alex and Chloe who I’d not been able to say more than a few words to in days.
I stopped by Alex’s room, but he wasn’t there. When I didn’t find Chloe in our room either, I realized that Alex was probably with her as she would need to be hidden if she was out for a walk. I wandered around some of the more private areas that I thought they might have gone to, finally ending up in the back hallway not far from my room where I’d met Steven on that first day. When I approached the window seat I saw both Chloe and Steven sitting together smiling and talking as though they’d known each other for years, with Alex sitting on the top step of a downward stairwell further up the hall. I waved as I passed by the happy pair in the window seat, not wanting to interrupt, and walked up behind Alex who smiled when he saw me coming.
“Hi,” I said, sitting down next to him.
“Hi.”
“Giving them privacy?” I asked, looking back toward the window seat.
“As much as I can while still being able to hide them.”
“How are they doing?”
“Great. They are together almost constantly,” he said, breaking my heart with the longing in his voice.
“I guess it’s good that neither of them really have anything to do,” I said, realizing only after I said it that it sounded like a justification of my own absence.
“Yeah,” he said simply, looking down at his hands. We sat quietly for a few minutes, until I saw that his gaze had wandered over to my hand and, more specifically, the enormous rock it held. He reached over and took hold of my fingers, lifting them up for a better look. “That’s… something.”
“I know,” I said as he released my hand. “Hard to believe something that is worth so much money could be so ugly.” I chuckled, but his smile was forced. “Hey,” I nudged him with my shoulder, “you’re still OK with all this, right?”
He laughed once without humor. “Still OK with it? What makes you think I was ever OK with it?”
“Because you said you were! Jocelyn asked you what you thought, and you said, and I quote, ‘It makes sense.’”
“Of course I said that, what was I supposed to say? It does make sense, that doesn’t mean I like it.”
“Alex, you know I’m only doing this because it’s what we all decided. It’s not like I’m having fun pretending to be Princess Pompous all day.” He nodded but it took too long. Checking the hall quickly, I took his chin and kissed him gently hoping to ease his frustration. “Don’t worry,” I said with a smile. “Tomorrow night is the banquet, then after that, this will all be over and things will go back to the way they were.” Again he nodded, but again he didn’t seem convinced.
“Want to take a walk?” I asked, hoping it would take his mind of things.
He smiled slightly, but shook his head. “I shouldn’t leave them, someone could come along.”
“Oh, right,” I glanced up the hall. “Forgot about them. That’s OK, I should probably start getting ready for tonight anyway.” I stood up.
“Plans?” he asked, not looking up.
“Yeah, there is a
youth social tonight I have to go to. But it shouldn’t be too late, and I was thinking that, if you wanted, we could watch a movie in your room after.”
He looked up with his first real smile. “I’d like that.”
“Great,” I smiled back, happy both to have plans with him and to see that he seemed better. “I’ll see you then.”
I turned to go, but before I could step away, he reached up from his seat on the step and grabbed my hand. With a look on his face that I’d never seen before, he got up, took me into his arms, and kissed me like he might never see me again. The surprise of it nearly threw me off balance, but his arms held me tightly, clinging to me like they’d never let go. It was deep, fiercely strong, and knee-shakingly passionate, but there was something else about it. Something that I couldn’t quite discern but that struck me as almost… desperate?
“I love you,” he breathed against my mouth, not even giving me a chance to respond before capturing my lips again. After a long moment he released me and stepped back, his face once again unreadable. “See you tonight,” he said with the shadow of a grin.
I nodded with one last smile and left, a quiver of worry in my chest. Something was going on with him, but I couldn’t tell what it was. He was usually so open about things, but this time it was almost like he was afraid to share. But what could possibly be that bad? I knew he missed me, because I missed him, but that wouldn’t bother him this much. I also knew that he wasn’t loving the fact that I was running all over town pretending to be engaged to another guy, and while he should have spoken up before it happened, I can see why he didn’t. But even that wasn’t all that big a deal considering he knew I was only doing it because I had to. No, it was something beyond all that, and I was determined to make sure that before we did anything else later that evening, I found out what it was.
CHAPTER 26
“Wow, look at you,” Chloe said as I stepped out of the bathroom that evening.
“You’ve seen this outfit before,” I reminded her, grabbing my earrings from the dresser and putting them on.
The Seers Page 28
