by Taylor Dean
And that’s what was between them.
Pure magic.
Luke showed up at her door that evening in full uniform, his cruiser parked behind him at the curb, a crackling radio voice interrupting the airwaves.
“Hey Jill. I was in the neighborhood and . . .”
Now there’s an original line. But when a man was using it as an excuse to see her, she didn’t mind it at all.
“. . . I thought I’d check and make sure we were still on for tonight. I’m off in an hour.”
Jill felt herself blush. All day she’d warred with herself, wondering if Luke was really as amazing as she’d thought last night. Or had she been delusional? Everything was happening much too fast. Just the fact that he was stopping by to see if their date was still on told her he was wondering if last night had been real too. They were both second guessing themselves. Of course, they’d be foolish if they didn’t. In spite of their unbelievable night together, the truth was they were practically strangers.
Her eyes took him in from head to toe. He certainly filled out his uniform quite nicely. His shirt was tucked in precisely, and the leather from his belt and holster squeaked as he moved. He looked crisp and fit. Realizing that he knew she was checking him out, she concentrated on his face and didn’t let her eyes wander downwards again. It wasn’t easy. It felt weird to know they’d slept in each other’s arms all night and yet here they were, feeling shy and awkward.
It was nine p.m., awfully late for a date. “Sure, we can eat donuts together in your cruiser.” Jill cringed. If it was possible to take back her words, she would’ve gathered them up and tossed them out the window.
In spite of her lame joke, Luke threw his head back and laughed out loud.
Jill knew she was in trouble. Big trouble. She could fall for this guy. Hard and fast. Maybe she already had.
“Go ahead, keep the cop jokes coming. I can take it.”
“I’m done.”
“Going easy on me, huh?”
“For now.”
“See ya in an hour or so?”
“I’d like that.”
True to his word, Luke showed up an hour and a half later, dressed casually in jeans and a button up dress shirt, his truck parked at the curb. A whiff of aftershave met her senses and when he gave her a quick hug, she caught a hint of minty breath. She liked a man who cared about how he smelled.
Once in the truck, Luke flicked off his radio so they could talk. She liked that too. “What do you feel like eating?”
Due to the lateness of the hour, she said, “How about IHOP? I love pancakes for dinner.”
“IHOP it is. But I’ll get something else. I hate pancakes. I haven’t eaten them since I was twelve.”
“Guess I found your first fault.”
“Can you live with it?”
“I think I can overlook it for now.” Are you kidding? Who cares? “But I bet I could make them and change your mind.”
11
Luke and Jill
April 2003
Present Day
Jill had never made pancakes for Luke. It was just one more unmade memory to add to the list.
“Jill! Jill! You all right in there?”
Banging on the door forced Jill out of her reverie. Her fingers softly wandered over her lips and her tears mixed with the moisture from the shower and wandered down the drain.
“I’m fine, Luke.”
Insta-love was fairly unbelievable. Until it had happened to her. It made her wonder why it didn’t happen more often. How was it that people could take one look at each other and not know this was the person they were meant to be with? How did they not immediately recognize their other half, their missing piece, the part that made them whole? Why did it take so long to know?
She didn’t know. But she was grateful she’d recognized it when it finally came her way. And that the feeling had been mutual.
Realizing she’d taken much too long, Jill shook off thoughts from the past. She exited the shower and dressed. She placed her hair in a ponytail and opened the bathroom door to let out the steam. As she unzipped her make-up kit, she silently thanked her mother for including it in her suitcase. While brushing a light bronzer over her face, Luke entered. He sat on the bathroom counter, holding a freshly baked cinnamon roll. He sunk his teeth into the moist roll, then held it out and Jill took a nibble at the exact spot where he’d just taken a bite, the action making her feel ridiculously close to him.
“Mmmm, thanks.”
Luke picked up pieces from her make-up kit and studied them. He visibly shivered at the sight of the eyelash curler. He turned over her blush and read the name aloud, “Raunchy Rose.”
“That was my nickname in high school,” they both said in unison and chuckled at their own joke.
They sobered quickly when Luke said, “Ready?”
Jill nodded and they made their way into the kitchen. He handed her a plate filled with bacon, eggs, two cinnamon rolls, and a few slices of cantaloupe. They made fast work of breakfast and then settled in the sunroom, sitting across from each other. It was bright and cheery with floral couch cushions atop wicker furniture. It was a comforting room and Jill knew she needed all the comfort she could get.
“Sleep well?” Luke asked.
“Not really.”
“Yeah. Me neither.”
“It’s our wedding day.”
His face clouded. “Yes it is.”
“I was dreading this day. I even told Chateau I still couldn’t work this weekend, even though everyone knows the wedding was cancelled. I’d planned on submersing myself in a few tubs of Ben and Jerry’s and a package of Oreos. I didn’t know I’d be spending the day with you. Makes up for it, I guess.”
“In a strange way, it does. Not so depressing.”
Jill wondered why he would feel depressed over a day he had decided to cancel. Guess she was about to find out why. Oddly, she actually dreaded what he was about to say. How would this knowledge change their relationship? Or the way she looked upon him?
“You love me, Luke?”
He looked her directly in the eyes. “Yes.”
There was no hesitation. “Maybe I don’t need to know anything else. Maybe that’s all that matters.”
“Could you really live with that, Jill?”
He was right. “No, I guess not. It would drive me crazy. Eventually I’d beg you to tell me.”
“Exactly. I don’t want any secrets between us.”
Her heart softened. Surely everything was going to be fine. She felt sure of it.
Luke ran his hands through his hair, a habit made when his hair was longer. “I don’t really know where to begin.”
“Just start. I’m listening.”
He stared at the floor, gathering his thoughts. His mood turned somber and Jill mentally prepared herself. Whatever he was about to impart, it wasn’t easy to put into words.
“I’ve been dying to speak to you since I left. I panicked, knowing if I never returned home, you’d never know how much I love you. I couldn’t stand the idea of you going through your life thinking I never cared for you, that our marriage meant nothing to me. I didn’t want you to carry that hurt with you for the rest of your life.”
Even though his words touched her heart, she’d focused on only one portion—losing him. “Don’t say that. You will return home. You will.”
His expression grave, he nodded. “I don’t want anything to end between us. I do want you to wait for me, Jill. Absolutely, I do. I’m sorry if that’s selfish on my part.”
“No it’s not. It’s what I want too. My commitment to you doesn’t end just because you have to leave for a time.”
“I wasn’t able to get a pass until now or I would’ve been here sooner to save you from so much heartache. I guess I could’ve called, but this isn’t something you say over the phone or in a letter or in an email for that matter. I wanted to call and say, ‘Forget what I said. I love you. I’ll explain later.’ I figured I’d confu
se you and you’d think I was a jerk, playing with your emotions. This is something I need to say in person, face to face. This was my first chance to get a pass and I got here just as fast as I could.”
Knowing Luke had been “dying” to speak to her to make things right between them made her heart swell.
“I made a promise to never tell anyone what I’m about to tell you and I’ve never broken that promise. Until now. I would’ve taken it to my grave, but my hand has been forced. If you’re gonna be my wife, you have every right to know. Actually, this conversation should’ve taken place a month ago.”
His eyes met hers, flashing with emotion.
“I took the coward’s way out, Jill. It seemed as if there wasn’t a right thing to do no matter which way I turned, so I simply took myself out of the situation. Too late, I realized I should’ve just told you the whole story right then and there. Together we could’ve faced it, I know that now. Instead I ran away. I’m not asking you to forgive me. I’m not sure you can. I’ll always regret that. I’m hoping we can move on from this and have a life together. But I know I made a huge mistake and I’ll understand if you want nothing to do with me. No hard feelings. At least you’ll know the truth. You’ll be able to let it go . . . and I’ll be able to live with myself. At least we’ll have that.”
Jill felt her heart drop into her stomach and wiped away a tear. He loved her and still wanted to marry her. She didn’t need more than that. What could possibly complicate their relationship?
“For you to understand my side of the story, I need to start at the very beginning, back to when Troy and I were just kids.”
“Troy?” she interrupted. Please don’t let this be about jealousy. Please. Please.
“Yeah. Troy is very much a part of this story, but not for the reasons you think.”
Was she that transparent? “Go on.”
“We’ve lived next door to each other since before we were even born. My mom has pictures of us in diapers, learning to crawl, learning to walk, and the two of us playing in the sandbox dumping sand on each other. As we got older, we were always at each other’s houses, playing all day and having sleepovers. His home was my home and my home was his home. We were inseparable. We went to kindergarten together, first grade, and second grade. It was third grade when they finally separated us. Didn’t matter. We were outside every night until the sun went down, playing ball, riding bikes, skateboarding, and getting into trouble. Every day seemed like an adventure. As far as childhood goes, it was the absolute best.”
12
Luke and Troy
May 1984
Nineteen Years Earlier
“On your marks, get set, go!” Troy yelled as they took off running as fast as they could go. Luke pushed hard, urging his legs to move beyond their limit.
Troy still won the race. He always did. He could run like the wind.
“I win!” Troy yelled.
“Let’s do it again,” Luke said, determined to run as fast as Troy.
“You wanna run faster, Luke?”
“Yeah.”
“My dad makes me march. He says marching puts your knees in the right place for running.”
“Okay,” Luke said as he followed Troy around his backyard, marching as if they were soldiers.
“Ready . . . now let’s run. Keep your knees the same.”
Troy was right. Running felt different with his knees in the right place. Luke felt as though he was flying across the lawn and he didn’t feel as though he would lose his balance. Troy was still faster though. His dad always made him practice, so he was real good.
“Troy! Luke! Some friends are here to see you,” Troy’s mom yelled from the back porch.
Matt Tucker, Kenneth Scott, and Brent Castro stood on the deck.
“Aw heck, why did she have to let them come over?” Troy harrumphed, his anger kindled.
“Aw, man.” Luke agreed. Matt, Kenneth, and Brent were bullies. They never played nice and cheated every chance they got. They always tripped the girls on the playground and teased Sally F. because her mom always made her wear a dress to school. Their favorite pastime was pushing kindergarten boys into the girls’ bathroom. They were just plain mean.
“Let’s play cops and robbers so we can arrest ‘em,” Luke said, looking forward to putting them in “jail.”
“Hey Troy, hey Luke,” Matt said. He was the ring leader. “Wanna play?”
“We’re playin’ cops and robbers. You guys wanna be the robbers?” Troy asked.
“Why do we always gotta be the bad guys?” Kenneth whined.
“My sister says the bad guys are always the cutest. Don’t know why,” Luke said. He just wanted being the bad guys to sound like a good thing so they’d agree.
Brent finally spoke up. “We’ll be bad guys. I like bein’ the bad guy.” He was short for his age and the girls were always teasing him. Maybe being bad made him feel bigger.
“Okay,” Troy said, taking over because it was his house and his backyard. “You guys just robbed a bank. Me and Luke are the cops. If we tag you, you’ve been caught and you have to let us take you to jail.”
“Where’s jail?”
“Through the gate. The front yard is jail. You have to leave and not play no more,” Luke told them.
“Yeah,” Troy said. “Jail means you hafta go home.”
Troy grinned at him and Luke grinned back. Their plan was ingenious. Luke wanted to high-five Troy, but that would make them seem happy about seeing the boys leave. Even if it was the truth, his mom told him he had to be polite. But if his mom knew these boys, she’d be sending them all to their rooms.
“Everyone hide. Count to fifty and then run. We’ll . . . I mean, the cops will come after you,” Luke told them.
“Wait, how do the bad guys win?” Matt asked.
“Bad guys don’t win, stupid,” Troy spat.
“If you touch the back fence, then you win,” Luke decided, knowing they’d never get past him and Troy. “You gotta hide at the front of the yard and try to get past us.” They practiced running every day and they were getting faster and faster. Even Jimmy T. couldn’t run as fast as them anymore. And he was a fifth grader.
“When I say three, everyone hide,” Kenneth said, taking over, like he was in charge or something. “1 . . . 2 . . .” He didn’t say three. They took off running at 2. Luke knew they would. They always cheated.
Luke and Troy hid in the bushes at the back of the yard, keeping a look out so they’d catch anyone trying to get to the back fence before they got to fifty.
“We’ll send ‘em all home, Luke. Good plan.”
“Yeah. They don’t have a chance against us.”
“Why does your sister think bad guys are cute?”
“I dunno. Mom says she’s got her head in the clouds.”
“What’s that mean?”
“I dunno.”
“Girls are stupid,” Troy said.
Luke thought about that. “Except Sarah B. She’s nice. She let me use her pencil the other day.”
“Yeah, I guess she’s all right. Her hair’s real yellow.”
“Yeah, and she can run real fast.”
“You wanna kiss her, Luke?” Troy made googly eyes at him.
“No. That’s gross.” Luke elbowed Troy in the ribs. “What are we at?”
“Lost count. I think thirty-two. Doesn’t matter anyway, if they come toward the fence, I’m gonna get ‘em.” Troy stood in a ready-to-run position.
“Here comes Matt. Cheating as usual. I’ll get him,” Luke said as he ambushed Matt and tagged him on the back. He grabbed his arm and told him he had the right to remain silent. Then he took him to the gate and told him to stay in jail.
Now it was two on two. Troy was already running after Kenneth, and Brent was just leaving his hiding place. Luke tagged Brent before he’d taken five steps.
“You say anything and I’ll hold it against you,” Luke heard Troy say to Kenneth.
After putting Kenne
th and Brent in “jail,” Troy’s mom appeared on the patio, holding a platter of cookies and several cups of lemonade. “Where’d all your friends go?”
“Had to go home.” Troy looked down at the ground, maybe feeling guilty.
“Well then, I guess all these cookies are just for you and Luke.”
After Troy’s mom went inside, they high-fived and ate so many cookies they felt sick.
“I’m gonna be a cop one day,” Luke told Troy. “And really catch bad guys.”
Troy drank his lemonade in two gulps. “We’ll be partners.”
“No one will get away from us.”
“But first I’m gonna run track and jump over hurdles like my dad did in high school. I’m gonna be as fast as him and win lots of trophies.”
“Me too. If we keep practicing, we’ll be the fastest cops in the world.” Luke ate one more cookie.
“Yeah, the very fastest.”
“C’mon, let’s go practice some more,” Luke said, wanting to run as fast as Troy.
13
Luke and Jill
April 2003
Present Day
Jill smiled at the sweet story of Luke and Troy as little boys. “How old were you?”
“Around eight.”
“You two were quite the little duo.”
“A bundle of trouble. That’s what Troy’s dad used to call us.” Luke’s eyes glittered as if fond memories were playing through his mind.
“I love that you and Troy have been friends since childhood. No wonder there’s such a bond between you.”
Luke nodded, but said nothing.
“Why are you telling me this, Luke? I’m not following you. What does this have to do with us?” Jill tucked her legs underneath her, settling into a comfortable position. Today her sole purpose centered on listening to every word Luke had to say. If she appeared as tense as she felt, those feelings would transfer to Luke.
Her tactic worked. Luke sat back and hooked one ankle over the opposite knee. “Troy and I had plans for our lives. At eight years old, we knew what we wanted to do. We dreamt of being track stars in high school. We both wanted to become police officers one day.” Luke smiled. “We were absolutely positive that we’d be partners and couldn’t imagine why it would never happen.” He shook his head. “We had a surprise coming.”
