by Johnson, Cat
“I’ll hear the radio if any calls come in.” His hand came up again to wrap around the back of her head as he pulled her in for another kiss.
She was starting to forget her list of concerns as he devoured her mouth with his. Vicki pulled away one more time, finding it even harder than the last. “What if someone comes in?”
“It’s midnight. No one is coming in for a good eight hours. I’m good, but I think we’ll be done by then.” He flashed her that sexy, heart-melting smile and she was done, too. Done fighting. Done worrying. Done denying her body what it craved so badly.
“Okay.” Her voice sounded husky in her own ears.
After he moved from her mouth to nibble on her ear, Vicki felt Ryan’s strong hands move lower. He moaned when he discovered she wore no underwear beneath her sweatpants. “God, I love how you sleep commando.”
She giggled, until he slid one finger inside of her and her breath caught in her throat.
“Mmm, and I love that you’re wet and I’ve barely touched you.”
A year of no sex tended to heighten the senses, she guessed. Or a man who knew exactly how and where to touch her.
“I want to touch every part of you. Kiss every inch of skin. Taste you.”
Vicki realized as talented as Ryan’s hands were, he wasn’t too bad in the verbal department, either.
While her heart pounded, he slid her sweats down, and his body followed the path. The cot creaked beneath his weight as Ryan did all that he had said he wanted to. He tasted her, feasted on her, really, until a body-wracking orgasm had her writhing beneath his mouth and hands. She was so shaken, breathless and sensitive, she had to stop him and pull his head away from her throbbing flesh.
His eyes were mere slits as he looked up at her. “I wish we could both be totally naked, skin to skin. I want every inch of me to touch every bit of you.”
“We can’t. It’s too risky.”
“I know. But I can do this.” Raising the hem of her t-shirt, he nuzzled one breast, then the other, teasing, tasting each sensitive nipple in turn.
She wanted to touch him, too. Craved the feel of his lean, muscles beneath her fingers.
“Can you at least take the body armor off?”
He smiled. “Yeah, I think I can do that.”
At least now, she had the freedom to run her hands over his broad, firm back as she nibbled on one of his earlobes. The action had him sucking in a breath of air.
She made a try at getting his belt off, but her valiant effort didn’t yield the results she wanted. “Now, Ryan. Please,” she pleaded, frustrated by more than his uncooperative Army issue belt.
He grinned, but his eyes held no humor, only need, as he quickly undid the buckle himself. “I thought you’d never ask.”
Vicki watched as he unbuttoned the fly of his pants and barely resisted the urge to lick her lips in anticipation. “You don’t ever have to wait for me to ask.”
The sound he emitted after hearing that could only be classified as a growl as his hands halted short of unveiling the one thing she was waiting for most. “I’m tromping on enough rules, already. I at least want to make certain you want this before I take you.”
She reached for him, touched him. “Don’t worry. I want this. I want you.”
Ryan’s voice had a gut-twisting, raspy quality to it as he said, “Who am I to deny a lady what she wants?” Then he freed himself and lowered his body over hers.
He was inside her in an instant, sliding in easily just like he had their first time together. She was more than ready. Judging by the hardness and the size of him, he felt the same.
The cot shook with their motion as he rocked against her, rubbing her still sensitive spot with each thrust. Vicki shook, too, beneath Ryan. He hit her in all the right places, stoking the fire that she’d banked and ignored for the past year. She felt the tension building, felt herself ready to topple over the edge. Vicki pulled him in deeper, and as if he knew what was coming, watched Ryan throw his head back and squeeze his eyes shut as she held him deep inside of her and began to come.
Just as he’d done that first morning when they’d made love, he waited for her to almost finish, as if he was savoring every second of her climax, then he thrust fast, in time with the aftershocks of her orgasm, before he finally pulled out of her and came himself.
A light sheen of perspiration glazed Ryan’s face as he shakily held his weight over her. Still basking in the afterglow of her own pleasure, and that of watching his face when he came, Vicki raised the hem of his tan uniform t-shirt and clasped her lips around one taught nipple.
She tasted the salt on his skin. A groan rumbled from deep within Ryan’s chest the moment her tongue darted out to tease the nub. The sound cut straight through her, until it tugged at parts lower, parts that again demanded attention even though her heart rate had barely recovered from the last time.
Vicki kissed across his chest, halting when she saw the small round bruise and the imprint of teeth marks on his shoulder. “Oh my god! Ryan, I did that to you.”
Ryan grinned. “Yeah, you did.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“I’m not. I liked it. Feel free to bite me while you’re coming anytime. Those kind of war wounds don’t bother me one bit.”
She smiled. Yeah, good sex was messy, and sweaty, and yeah, sometimes painful, in a good way. And she and Ryan, so far, anyway, had had some really good sex.
With a sigh, Ryan rolled off her, and stood. “As much as I hate to, I’d better get dressed.”
“Do you have to leave?”
He smiled and touched her face before beginning to refasten his pants. “No. I’ll be right here. But I think I better get my pants on at least. Hawk said he feels a big one coming on and he’s hardly ever wrong.”
Feeling silly with her shirt pulled up to her neck and her sweats down around her ankles, Vicki righted her own clothes as she asked, “Hawk feels a big what coming on?”
Ryan flashed her a schoolboy grin as he pulled on his bulletproof vest. “That sounded kind of dirty, didn’t it? Sorry. I meant a big enemy attack. Hawk is tuned into the bad guys so well that he gets a gut feeling before they attack. It’s kind of eerie, actually. He says he feels it coming like a storm rolling in.”
“So what do you do?”
“We listen to him. You don’t ignore one of Hawk’s feelings.”
A moment ago, Vicki would have been sad that Ryan was totally dressed now, but in light of Hawk’s prediction, she was wondering if she should pull on her own body armor and sleep in it for the rest of the night. “But what can you do to prepare for it?”
“Watch, wait. And don’t put off anything you want to do, because no one gets a guarantee for tomorrow.”
With that, Ryan bent down and kissed her one more time, gently, sweetly, but definitely not chastely.
When he broke the kiss and straightened up, Vicki could think again and remembered something that had struck her as very familiar. “That milblog that I read, the guy said almost the same exact thing you just did. Almost word for word, about having no guarantee for tomorrow.”
Ryan’s face got a funny expression on it. One Vicki couldn’t quite read. “Yeah, about that…”
He never got to finish his sentence as an explosion rocked the air, followed by a shout from somewhere outside the tent. “Incoming!”
“Shit.” Ryan sprung into action, turning for the flap leading to the main part of the Operations Center.
Vicki jumped up from the cot, ready to follow him anywhere rather than be left alone. “What’s happening?”
As if her question reminded him she was there, he spun back. “We’re under attack. Get your body armor and a helmet on now!”
He glanced around, located the items where she’d left them before retiring, and after flinging it all at her, he shoved her far into the back of the small room, between two heavily loaded wooden storage shelves and away from the door.
Ryan ran into the main section of the t
ent, and Vicki followed, watching as he grabbed his own helmet and weapon and cracked the door of the tent, peering out into the darkness.
The sounds of men running and shouting came through the narrow opening. Ryan slammed the door shut and went to sit at what looked like a console just as a radio sprang to life and Hawk’s muffled voice came through. “This is Hawk. Call for air support. Repeat, we are under attack and need air support.”
Ryan sat in the chair and grabbed the microphone. “Roger that.”
“Tell them to hit the river bed hard. That’s where the bastards are hiding. Over.”
“Got it, Hawk. Over.”
Vicki watched, frightened and wide eyed, as Ryan called whomever to order air support to hit the riverbed. He spoke to an apparently British man, judging by the accent of the voice that was coming out of the radio, and then Ryan called back to Hawk. “Close air support. Two minutes, Hawk. Repeat, two minutes. Over.”
With the sound of battle almost obscuring the garbled call, Vicki heard Hawk respond, “Copy that. Out.” Then she heard the first part of Hawk’s shouted orders to his men as he cut the transmission.
It was all so surreal, and at the same time, far too real. Hawk had been right. This was no place for her. She wasn’t a combat reporter. This was the kind of life Mel lived. He loved the fight, the action. He thrived on it. All she wanted was to see how a few women lived and then finish her story. Mortars possibly being aimed at the tent where she slept was not part of her original plan. But then again, neither was Ryan…
His calls made, Ryan rose and went to the door again. “Are you leaving?” Panic tinged Vicki’s words.
“As much as I’d like to, no, I can’t leave. I’m TOC guard.” He had answered her question, but his attention was on what was happening outside.
Tears filled her eyes. “I don’t know what that means.”
Her voice must have told him she was upset. He glanced over his shoulder at her. “You should be in the back. It’s safer.”
She laughed tearfully. “We’re in a tent. How safe could it be?”
Checking one more time outside, Ryan shut the door with a sigh. “Come here.”
She went to him and he wrapped his arms around her. “I’m sorry. Being trapped in here instead of out there with Hawk and the rest of my squad is killing me.”
“I’m trapped in here, too.”
He squeezed her harder. “I know. But there is nothing I can do to protect you from inside here except maybe throw my body in front of yours and hope the mortar or RPG hits me and doesn’t go through to get you. Out there, with my men manning the rocks, and the second and third squads taking the other positions, we can take out the guys shooting at us. I’d far rather prevent them launching shit at us than try to duck and avoid getting hit with it after the fact. Do you understand?”
She did, but it didn’t make the thought of being alone and without Ryan during an attack any easier. To distract herself, she asked him another question. “What’s TOC mean?”
“Tactical Operations Center. As TOC guard, I have to man the communications until someone else gets here to do it.”
She knew she was shaking, and Ryan definitely felt it, too. He stroked her back and kissed the top of her head. “We’re going to be okay.”
“How do you know?” She could barely say the words she was so close to hysteria. Just what Ryan needed in the middle of an attack, a hysterical woman. She was really not cut out for this life.
Ryan lifted his head suddenly. “Shh. Listen.”
She couldn’t hear a thing past the pounding of her heart and her own heavy breathing. “What?”
He smiled. “That sound. That’s our fixed-wing air support.”
As if on cue, the night seemed to explode with gunshots and explosions. Vicki jumped and Ryan held her tighter with one arm while opening the door a crack with the other.
And then there was silence. Total and utter silence which seemed even more out of place after the noise of the battle.
“And that, is the sound of the good guys winning.” He grinned at her, before releasing her from his grasp to go talk at the communications console some more. Through the haze of fright and shock, she heard a British voice on the radio and then Hawk’s voice again. She could barely comprehend what was being said between Ryan, the man who must be a pilot or something judging by the conversation, and Hawk.
What Vicki did get was that all of them seemed to be celebrating. She was pretty sure these men could have died that night, and yet they were acting like boys after winning a football game.
Unable to stand up any longer, Vicki sank down to the floor and hugged her knees tightly to her chest. What the hell had she gotten herself into? Not only coming here to Afghanistan, but also falling for Ryan. This was far worse than falling for a journalist she worked with. Ryan was a professional soldier. He ran toward enemy fire when anyone else, anyone sane, would run away from it.
How could she possibly love a man like that? More than that, how could she face losing him? Because she was pretty damn sure it was already too late to avoid loving him.
Chapter Twelve
“Something’s up with you.” Ryan had eventually gotten done with TOC guard duty, and all the other assorted crap he had to do. Finally, he had time to track down Vicki. He had found her alone, working on her laptop in his quarters. At last, they had some privacy. That was the good news. The bad news was there was definitely something going on with her. It was almost as if she had avoided him all day. Sure, he’d been busy, but he couldn’t catch her alone, not even once, and he had tried.
“Nothing’s up. Why do you ask?” Vicki hadn’t even turned to look at him when he’d entered. She stayed facing her computer screen.
Ryan frowned at her back. “You’re acting different. Strange. Are you sure everything’s okay?”
“Yeah. Fine.” She finally turned sideways in the chair to face him. “When can I go out into the country with you and the squad?”
That was a big enough change of subject to cause mental whiplash. Unless this was what was bothering her, the fact she hadn’t gotten to research her story yet. And maybe she was afraid to now because of last night. That could be the problem, but still, Ryan wasn’t so certain that was it.
“You sure you still want to go off base with us?” Ryan left the words after last night’s attack unspoken.
A look of determination settled on her face. “Ryan, it’s something I have to do.”
“I know. I understand.”
She looked surprised at that. “You do?”
“Yeah, sure. I know how important your story is to you.” Because I snooped in your computer and read the beginnings of it. Ryan hoped the guilt didn’t show on his face.
“So, when do you think the squad will be going out to see the locals again? Is the moon bright and the flowers all bloomed, or whatever?” She made the small joke half-heartedly.
He smiled. “We’re not going to do any visiting today, that’s for certain.”
“Why not? Because of the attack last night?” Her voice sounded strange. Yeah. Last night had definitely freaked her out a little bit, not that Ryan could blame her. The shit hitting the fan may give him an addictive dose of adrenaline, but it had been a very different experience for Vicki.
“No, not because of last night. If we changed our plans every time there was an attack, we’d never get anything done around here.” Vicki looked even unhappier at that information so he elaborated. “We got a supply drop earlier today. That’s why we can’t go.”
Vicki frowned. “I didn’t hear or see any planes or helicopters making a supply drop.”
“Exactly. The damn pilot missed the drop zone by a couple of miles. Our pallet full of supplies is currently spread all over the ground in the middle of the orchard on the other side of the river. We have to go out and get it and bring it all back.”
Her eyes opened wide. “For real? You have to go out there to get your supplies?”
“Ye
ah. For one, we don’t want the bad guys to get them. For another, we need them for ourselves. Those MREs may not be the best, but at least they’re something to eat. And there’s a rumor we’re getting actual cans of soda this drop.”
“So, you’re just going to tromp out there, where there are obviously men who want to kill you, and collect your supplies? Right out there in the open. Unprotected.”
“Of course not. We’re not unprotected. We have weapons.” Ryan assessed the possible source of the scowl on Vicki’s face. “There’s that look again.”
“What look?” Vicki avoided eye contact. That was not at all encouraging.
“The same look you’ve had all day. Actually since last night after the attack.” He moved closer and ran a finger up and down her arm. He expected her to lean into him, like she usually did whenever they were alone and he touched her. She didn’t.
“You’re sure there’s nothing wrong?”
“Mmm, hmm.” She nodded. He wasn’t convinced.
Ryan dropped his hand from her arm as the door to the hut opened. “Time to go, Pettit.”
“Okay, Wally.”
Instead of leaving, as Ryan had hoped he would, Wally stood in the doorway and waited. Ryan silently cursed him. Now, he couldn’t kiss her, he couldn’t even say anything personal. “See you soon, Vicki.”
She nodded silently, that strange look still on her face.
With one last glance back, and a wink that hopefully spoke all the words that remained unsaid, Ryan turned and left both Vicki and the base behind him.
It may have been a long, annoying trip they had to make to collect supplies which should have been dropped in the correct spot but all too often weren’t, but the view on the trip was amazing. Ryan never failed to notice it each time they trekked through the mountains beneath the azure blue skies.
The weather was sunny and warm enough you had to remember to keep drinking water or risk dehydration. Crazy desert temperatures, cold at night, hot during the day.
Ryan readjusted the weight of his rucksack and weapons, and then went back to loading the supplies into the back of the pickup that would transport the boxes back to the base while the squad walked.
