by Faye Sonja
She reached up and wiped her eyes. "But you couldn't possibly have known where I was! I waited till I was out of your sight before I turned back this way."
He smiled down at her and raised an eyebrow. "Yes, being adventurous as usual. Too adventurous for your own good."
She didn't quite return the smile. "So how did you know to find me here Jedediah? Please, be honest with me."
He sighed, his arms still underneath her as he knelt beside her. "I realized - well, Kit helped me realize - that you were the author of that story."
She bowed her head. "Oh." She looked down. "Sorry. It was wrong of me not to trust you."
"Susan, as soon as I realized my mistake I felt like such a fool. I came down the hill after you, and when I couldn't see you I knew you'd have come here. Just like the woman in that story." He gazed down at her curiously. "Ain't you glad to see me?"
She looked over his shoulder, where the bear lay now, silent, amongst the fallen branches. "Yes, I am. You saved my life. Again," she had to admit.
He pulled one hand out from under her to brush the hair away from her face, her bonnet having flown off as she hit the ground. "Is that the only reason you're pleased I came after you?"
She shook her head, barely able to feel the pain in her ankle now. "So you don't mind that I'm the author? Or that I'm keeping my job as a writer?"
"Mind?" He shook his head. "No Susan, I'm awful proud of you." He sighed. "I know it don't seem that way, but I am. I'm sorry that I made you feel so bad about it. Having you run off like that, putting your life in danger because of my stupid comments...Well, I wouldn't have forgiven myself if something had happened to you."
She turned her face away again. "It was my own silly fault. You're right, it is dangerous up here. Sometimes I need to face facts, and not be so stubborn. I've been so set on proving that I can handle myself, that I don't listen to common sense or reason. I know you only want what's best for me..."
"I know you only want the best for me as well, my love..." he murmured, brushing his lips against her forehead, but Susan still didn't turn her face fully around.
"It's finally time," she thought, as she took a low, slow breath, closing her eyes for a second before she opened them again.
"Jedediah, there's something else I've got to tell you."
A silence fell, as Jedediah took a sharp breath. "What is it, Susan? I can tell it's something serious, if you can't even meet my eyes."
She nodded her head, so faintly he could have missed it if he hadn't been staring at her so intently, thinking about how beautiful she looked right then.
"Jedediah, I'm afraid you'll think the worst of me. If you think I'm wild because I'm a writer, and because I go off on hikes, then once you hear this you'll really think you've married a spoiled woman..."
"Shh," he said, reassuring her, as he lay another kiss on her forehead. "All that matters is that you're here, with me, now in White Elk. If there's something in your past that you're ashamed of, well." He smiled down at her. "You don't even need to tell me if you don't want. Just know that I forgive and accept you for whatever it is."
She turned her head and finally looked up into his dark, chocolatey brown eyes. "It means so much to hear you say that, Jedediah." She took a deep breath. "But I need to tell you, anyway. Enough of the deception between us. I want to claim that here, right now, in front of God, we make a vow to start over, with complete honesty between us. So I want to tell you."
He nodded, brushing his thumb against her cheek. "You can tell me anything."
"I...I was married before..." she began, and explained, in simple words, the terrible things that had taken place. She kept her words short, and blunt, and as she spoke she kept her eyes fixed on a point just left of Jedediah's face, too scared to check for his reaction.
"Well, this is it," she thought. "If we're to start over, have a real marriage based on honesty, this is the moment." She wondered if Jedediah would simply drop her, walk away, find a women without a spoiled past to love and marry.
But he pulled her in close to her and held her as tightly as he could. "I love you, Susan. And none of that matters to me. It's you and me now, and here in front of God I swear that I will love and protect you forever. Not just from bears, and wild creatures, but from any person who would want to hurt you. And I will never hurt you again, Susan. You have my promise on that."
* * *
Epilogue
Twelve Weeks Later
White Elk 1871
"The baby was so beautiful," Susan said, snuggling into Jedediah as they walked back to their house, following a wonderful dinner shared at Mollie and Thomas's house.
Jedediah nodded. "Kit and Isabella are the perfect choice for Godparents as well," he said, looking down at Susan for her reaction. "You're not sad it wasn't you chosen, are you?"
Susan shook her head and reached down to pat her own belly, wistfully. "No. For one thing, of course, I would never begrudge that honor from Kit and Isabella. You're right, they are the perfect choice to be Godparents."
"I'm glad for Kit," Jedediah commented. "And I'm glad he can finally retire from the wood chopping game, now that I can take over, full time." He squeezed Susan tighter, as they walked in the cool breeze. Spring had just come to White Elk, and although the temperatures had risen slightly, there was still a chill blowing in from across the lake, and through the pine trees.
"And I'm pleased for Isabella," Susan commented, as they reached their front door. "She is the best person to look after a child in case anything happens." She cleared her throat as they stepped inside the door, and Jedediah went to place a log on the fire, striking a match to fill the home with warmth and light. "In fact, Jedediah, I was also thinking she might be perfect for..."
"Wait there," Jedediah said, interrupting her. "I've got something to show you."
She sighed and smiled, standing for a second before she reached out and pulled a chair towards her. Better she sit down; she wasn't sure how long Jedediah was going to be.
He came back with a jar of something in his hands. "Speaking of Isabella..." he said, holding it out to her like it was treasure. "I've been to see her, on my own."
"Oh, Jedediah," she said, jumping up, putting her arms around his neck. "Have you really?" She pulled back and looked at him, before planting a kiss on his cheek. "Oh, I'm so pleased."
He looked down at the ointment, a little skeptically, but his voice was warm and happy as he replied to her. "Yes, she took a look at my burn marks, and told me this would do the trick."
"I'm so happy," she said. "And not just because of the cream. Jedediah, I'm glad you've gone to see Isabella for another reason because, it shows me that you can trust doctors now, which will be important now that we're about to..."
"Wait," he said, interrupting her once again. "I have one last thing to show you. This time it's a present just for you."
"Okay," she said, giggling, sitting down again. While she waited for Jedediah to fetch the gift she sat down again, glancing around at their modest home. Gone was her green bonnet. She fixed it up and sold it, and kept the money, putting it aside for something special. Something Susan was trying to tell Jedediah about, if he'd just give her the chance. Also gone were all of their so-called 'fine' items, replaced by sensible, durable furniture that would do just fine for a young family.
She smiled to herself as she waited for Jedediah to come back into the room. He finally reappeared, holding a frame in his hands, glancing at her proudly. He handed it over to Susan and she gasped in delight as she looked over it. "You've had my first story framed...Oh, Jedediah, I love it."
"And I love you, Susan."
She smiled, and placed the frame in her lap. "I love you as well." She reached down and patted her belly again. "Jedediah, there's another reason Mollie didn't ask me to be God mother, you know," she said, a smile spreading across her face, despite her best efforts to contain it.
"There is?" he asked, looking confused.
"Yes, Mo
llie knows I am younger than Isabella, and about to start a family of my own. So with that, and my writing, and a husband like you, I will have my hands full." She placed the frame on the table, still waiting for Jedediah to cotton on.
"About to start a family?" he asked.
"Well, yes," she said, blushing. "Very soon, in fact."
He looked down, finally understanding what she was trying to say. He stood up, picking her up in his arms. "Oh Susan, are you serious? Are you sure?"
She nodded, wrapping her arms around his neck. She pulled back when she realized the course material of her dress was rubbing against Jedediah's old wound. "It's alright," he reassured her quietly. "It doesn't hurt anymore."
She squeezed him again. "I'm so pleased, Jedediah. I love you, my darling."
"I love you too, Susan," he said, feeling her arm around his neck. "You, and our baby."
* * *
PREGNANT, WIDOWED & PROTECTED BY HER FLAWED HERO
THREE BRIDES FOR THREE WAR COMRADES
BOOK 3
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b o o k 3
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At just nineteen years old, Mollie thinks she has EVERYTHING. She's a newlywed, with a husband who has just left to fight in the civil war. But then she gets the news that changes everything.
Now she's ALONE. WIDOWED . PREGNANT.
Mollie is DESPERATE to start again and will risk everything to find a new father for her baby. Even if it means marrying a man she's never met.
Thomas Doherty - A flawed sheriff who is hiding deep scars from the war.
Can Mollie get passed her grief?
Can each of them learn to heal the scars from their past?
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1
Mollie
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“ My heart will remain my own, on
that I give my promise. But I need
to do what's best for my baby...”
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Mollie Hathorn gazed down at her wedding ring, spinning it around on her finger. "I still can't stop looking at it, Annie, even after all these months."
Next to her, her older sister shook her head, grinning, and went back to mixing the cake batter. "Well, maybe when John finally returns home tomorrow, you'll have something to distract you away from staring at that ring."
Mollie giggled and gave her sister a hug. "Oh, I am so excited, Annie, I could just burst. It feels like he's been gone forever. Three months feels like an eternity." She gazed down at her wedding finger again, wistfully. "We haven't even had a chance to live our lives as a real married couple yet. Getting married only a week before he went to war...only the day after I turned nineteen..."
"You had to do it then though, didn't you?" Annie asked gently. "Just...in case... you know. In case he didn't come back."
Mollie nodded. "Thank goodness he is, though." She broke out into a wide grin and dipped a finger into the cake batter, tasting it. "Mmm," she said.
"Hey!" Annie cried out in dismay, batting her younger sister's hand away. "I need all of this!"
"Well it is for my husband's coming home party. So I am entitled to try the cake before it is served."
"Before it's even been baked," Annie pointed out. She placed her spoon down gently and brushed her hands against her apron. "Mollie..." she said, softly. "You do know it's not really a 'coming home' party, per se, don't you? John is just on leave. He'll have to go back to fighting after a few days."
Mollie bowed her head. "I know..." she said quietly, before bringing her head back up. "But do let me pretend, Annie. I miss him so much. Just, let's pretend he's back for good. Just for a day or two."
Annie reached over and squeezed her little sister by the shoulders. "Yes. Let's do that."
* * *
Annie gasped and jumped up and down as they saw the men approaching the large property. It was not just John returning home that day, but many of the town's men, brothers, fathers, and husbands to the many women who had gathered at the Hathorn's large home. The lawn was decorated with banners and and streamers, flags were flying, and there were tables set out with drink and food. A celebration fit for a soldier's home coming.
But beside her sister, Mollie was still. Something wasn't right, she could feel it. She squinted as the sun glared down on them, trying to make out the figures that approached them.
Annie was still hopping on her toes. Though she was unmarried, not expecting anyone particularly special on that day, she was still filled with the excitement and anticipation of the occasion. She was pleased that all her friends’ loved ones were returning home, if only for a short while, and, most of all, she was excited for Mollie.
"Annie..." Mollie said. "Where is John?"
"What do you mean? Surely he's there amongst the rest of the men."
Mollie brought her hand up and shielded her eyes from the bright sun, squinting to try and make out John amongst the crowd. She scanned the line of men for the tall, handsome man she had married just three months earlier. Her childhood sweetheart. Her John.
She shook her head. "I...I can't see him. Annie - where is he?" She tugged on her older sister's arm. "Am I going mad? Annie, please, can you see him?" A panic started to enter her voice as she tugged Annie's arm again. "Please, can you look for him?"
Annie put her hand down and turned to look at her little sister, a dark look forming on her face. "I'm sure it's nothing to worry about. Maybe he got held up somewhere, or he's fallen a little behind."
Mollie shook her head, and began to walk towards the line of men. She felt as though her shaking legs could barely support her as she broke into a jog, holding up the hem of her long dress as she began to run over the lawn. "Wait," Annie cried, trying to get Mollie to come back to her, but the younger girl kept running.
"Mollie..." her mother called out, from the other side of the garden. "Whatever are you doing, child?"
But she couldn't hear anyone calling out to her. All she could think about was getting to the men, hoping she'd been mistaken, that John had been there all along, hidden behind someone, bringing up the rear.
She stopped, breathless, as she reached the line of men. As soon as she saw the looks on their faces, the glances of pity as their eyes fell away from her and stuck to the ground, she knew.
"Mollie," one of them said, as a ringing sound filled her ears, and she fell to the ground. "I'm so sorry..."
* * *
One Month Later
"Mollie, we need to talk to you," her Ma said gently, leading her towards the sitting room. "Sit down." Her entire family was gathered ‘round, and Mollie glanced at them, wondering what they could possibly have to say to her. What they could possibly say to make her feel better.
"Mollie," her Ma started again. "We all think it's finally time you stopped dressing in black." Her voice was less gentle this time. "It's time for you to move on with your life."
Mollie scowled at her. "I can never move on with my life, don't you see?"
"Mollie..." her Ma reached out for her hand, but Mollie snatched it away.
"You don't understand," Mollie said, picking up the hem of her long black lace gown before she looked around at the rest of her family. "None of you do!"
The next day her Ma waited for Mollie to come down to breakfast, praying the young girl would finally be out of her mourning clothes. The dreary, heavy black gown, that she had refused to take off for a month.
Her Ma sighed as Mollie came down the stairs. "Still dressed in black, I see." She turned away and shook her head, muttering to herself. "I thought our words yesterday might have finally sunk in. Made you see some sense. My dear, I do think you're simply dwelling in misery right now. It has gone on long enough."
"What would you rather I do?" Mollie asked, picking up the hem of her skirt
as she swanned around to face her mother. "I can't simply forget about John, can I?" Her eyes began to fill with tears, her large, doll-like blue irises suddenly spilling over like an overflowing lake. "He was my first love...my only love." She looked down at the ring on her finger. Once the cause of her greatest joy, it was now her greatest sorrow. "We promised to love each other forever. In front of God, mama. I can't break that vow just because he's gone."
Her Ma sighed. She reached a hand out and placed it on Mollie's arm. "In time, Mollie, you will see that there are other men that you can come to love. Your grief won't last forever."
"Never, mama, never can I ever love another man," Mollie snapped, furious in her conviction. "I don't know how you can even suggest such a thing."
"I know it doesn't seem that way now, Mollie, but you are young, and in time..."
"There will be no time. My age has nothing to do with it. Mama, how can you suggest I could ever break my vows to John?" Her wide, innocent eyes were brimming with tears as she looked at her Ma, pleading for her to say something that would make sense of all this. In some way she was still a girl, so child-like, with her thick curls and rosy complexion. But the way she was behaving now showed all the passion of a woman with experience and heartache.
"I'm saying, love will come along for you again. You're still so young, and there's no shame in having lost a husband to war. You are a young widow; you've lost a brave solider. No man will hold that against you, or consider you damaged goods, my love..."
Mollie hung her head, shaking it violently, so that tears sprayed out onto the carpet. "It's not about whether a man will want me, mama, and you should realize that! It's about whether I could ever love another man again. And I know, in my heart of hears, the answer is no!"
