‘So you have delivered babies then?’
‘Yes, I delivered babies many years ago and, to be honest, in the situation we were in two days ago, anyone sharing that elevator with you would have been sufficiently qualified to help. You could not have done it alone.’
With the bedclothes tucked up firmly around her like a shield, she continued. ‘So these babies you delivered, were they during your training then?’
Patrick didn’t want to go into too much detail but knew Claudia deserved more of an explanation. The boys were safe now but she needed to know that they had been safe the entire time. ‘I was an obstetrician in the UK. I worked in the field for a number of years so that’s why you and your boys were, all things considered, in safe hands.’
It made sense and it was logical but it still unsettled her. ‘Why didn’t you just tell me that?’
‘Because it had been almost twelve years and I knew that it still would have heightened your fear. You would have worried that I might not have been competent. I knew I could do it but I couldn’t spend my energy reassuring you of the fact.’
Claudia accepted his reasoning and even agreed in part but still...
Was there anything else he hadn’t told her? Was there something else she should have known?
She fixed her eyes on him intently and decided to just ask. ‘So why did you change profession? Why did you stop delivering babies?’
Patrick lowered his tall frame onto the chair beside her bed. He had never wanted to tell anyone anything about his past as much as he did Claudia at that moment. He wanted to be honest about what had transpired and the future that had been so unfairly taken from him, but he couldn’t. It had been locked inside for too many years to bring it up. He had moved on and so had everyone else. He would have no idea even where to start and he was worried where it might end.
So telling Claudia made no sense, he thought. He shook his head. ‘I needed a change of scenery and thought I would change my specialty at the same time.’
‘So you just upped and moved countries so you could surgically create perfect noses and big...’ She paused and looked down towards her breasts.
‘Yes, I perform breast augmentations and facial enhancements,’ he admitted. He was proud of the work he performed but it had never been his dream. Bringing children into the world had always been what he had wanted to do until he’d had to walk away.
‘You said it was over a decade but when exactly did you deliver the last baby before Thomas and Luca?’
Patrick felt his jaw tense. He had made his mind up not to relive that painful time in his life, so made his answer brief. ‘Twelve years ago next month and it was back in the UK...’
‘Why did you give up?’ Claudia interrupted him as she sought to uncover a little more detail. She sensed Patrick was perhaps not telling her the entire story. His story about leaving obstetrics in England to pick up cosmetic surgery in Los Angeles seemed to be missing a piece. What was his motivation for the change? She was curious about the handsome man beside her, whose subtle woody cologne was suddenly penetrating her senses.
‘Like I said, time for a sea-change and a challenge.’ He felt cornered. It wasn’t a lie but it wasn’t the entire story either. ‘You need to know that I wanted only what was best for you in that elevator. Maybe I should have told you, maybe I was right in not telling you. We’ll never know now.’
‘I guess we won’t.’
‘You’re an incredibly brave woman; I hope you know that.’
‘I had limited choices.’ Her mood was still pensive and his compliment didn’t sit well. She had been deceived by the father of her children and, while this situation was different, it felt horribly similar. She didn’t like the truth being hidden from her, no matter what it was.
‘You’re an amazingly resilient woman. You made a conscious choice to face adversity head-on,’ he replied. In a perfect world he would open up to Claudia and let her into his past. But his world wasn’t perfect. In a perfect world he would still be Dr Patrick Spencer, OBGYN in the Harley Street practice he had dreamt of opening. But if compensation for his years of disappointment came in the chance meeting with Claudia, and even if it only lasted a brief time, he felt at peace with that. She had a positivity and strength that he had never witnessed before and he felt in time he would be a better man just being around her.
Not that he would have much time.
Claudia had been let down once; he didn’t want to be the second man to let her down. He wouldn’t make any promises other than to enjoy the weeks until she left. To be someone she could depend on during those weeks.
A rock for her.
It all sounded so logical in his head but his body had different ideas and it took every ounce of willpower not to kiss her. Not to press his lips against hers and taste the sweetness he knew her mouth would hold.
Claudia Monticello was testing Patrick in a way he had never expected.
* * *
Claudia leant back against the pillows and felt her eyes becoming heavy.
Being close to him and reacting the way she did confused her. Looking at the curves of Patrick’s handsome face in the soft lighting of her hospital room, she struggled with what she knew she had to do. What she wanted to do was to find any excuse to have him nearer to her. To feel the warmth of his breath on her face, smell the sweet muskiness of his cologne and wait expectantly for his mouth to claim hers.
But what she had to do was to push him away. She had to have learned something from her last disastrous relationship. She couldn’t allow herself to develop feelings for Patrick, only to find herself disappointed again. This time she had her boys to consider. Becoming involved on any level with Patrick would be risky for everyone. Not to mention pointless. She was leaving soon anyway.
Patrick watched as Claudia seemed lost in thought. ‘I should go.’
‘I am a little tired,’ she said, agreeing.
‘Would you like me to call in to see you tomorrow?’ he asked as he stood.
Claudia hesitated before she replied. She was torn. ‘I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Patrick,’ she replied in a low voice.
‘I really am sorry that I didn’t tell you everything outright but there was nothing self-serving about what I did, I can assure you of that.’
‘It’s not that.’
‘Then what is it?’
‘There’s no point to this...to...you and me...’ She stumbled over her words, unsure of how to define a relationship she didn’t understand. And one that scared her.
‘To me visiting you when you have no one else in the country because your only family is the other side of the world?’
‘It’s not that, it’s just that I don’t really know you and...’
‘We shared a life-changing experience and, quite apart from that, I enjoy your company. It doesn’t have to become complicated.’ Patrick knew that wasn’t entirely true. Just being near her was driving him to want more.
‘I’ll always be grateful for what you did, saving my boys and myself, but I’ll be returning to London soon. And there’s no need for you to keep me company when you have your own life.’ She paused for a moment to cement the resolve in her mind. To make sure that she was doing the right thing. To remind herself that no good would come from stringing out the inevitable. Nor could she become involved on any level with a man who hid the truth, no matter how seemingly insignificant it might appear or whatever logical reason he could provide. It was a shaky point to hang her argument on, but it was all she had and she would use it.
She had to try to be more sensible like Harriet and less impetuous. And it had to start then and there. There was no time to rethink.
‘You should find a nice young woman who lives in Los Angeles. Remember I have two little boys and you don’t want children. You told me as much in the lift.�
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‘Whoa, slow down,’ he said. ‘You’re thinking way too far ahead.’
Claudia smiled at his response. ‘I have to, Patrick. I have my sons to consider.’
‘And I would always consider your children. I helped bring them into the world and they are special little men. I couldn’t forget about them.’ It was the truth. Patrick’s feelings for Claudia and her sons had grown very real. And his desire for her was equally real. ‘Can you just let this play out and see what might happen?’
‘No...’ She drew a breath. Whilst it was lovely to know how he felt, it didn’t change what she had to do. She needed to look after her boys and forget about romance. It wouldn’t be in the cards for her now or anytime in the near future and he was making her feel that it could be. And should be.
She had to cut him free and remove any risk of her becoming attached.
‘I’m sorry, Patrick, but I think it’s for the best if we say goodbye tonight...for good.’
CHAPTER SEVEN
PATRICK WALKED INTO his house, feeling more alone than before he’d met Claudia. He dropped his keys by the door and decided to take a shower and try to forget her. Put everything in perspective and move on.
As he lay in his bed, looking up at the ceiling in a room lit only by the moonlight, he wondered why he cared so much.
He didn’t want a future. Or a family. She was being sensible and clearly he wasn’t. For the first time in more years than he could remember, he had allowed his heart to lead him.
And his desire to kiss the woman whose face would not leave his mind that night.
He had so many questions he’d wanted to ask Claudia but he hadn’t. Perhaps that was where he had gone wrong, he thought as he tossed again, throwing the bedclothes free of his body, dressed only in boxer shorts. If he knew more about Claudia he might better understand her need to push him away. She had obviously been hurt by someone.
He ran his fingers through his still damp hair and looked towards the bay window of his bedroom and the full moon suspended in the clear night sky and knew it had to have been Thomas and Luca’s father who had broken her heart. She had put on a brave face when she had spoken of him having no interest in his sons but there had to be more to it. Walking away from the boys’ father or watching him walk away surely wouldn’t have been easy for a woman like Claudia. Her family values seemed so strong.
In that case, the man who’d fathered her children must have made her fearful of getting close to anyone. But why, he wondered, would any man treat a woman that way? It didn’t make sense in the way he saw the world. A man should protect a woman, and particularly the mother of his children. He should lay his life down for her and his sons.
That was what Patrick knew in his heart he would do if he had been Thomas and Luca’s father.
After a restless night and the acceptance that Claudia wanted to be alone, Patrick knew he had to keep a distance between them. But there was one last thing he intended to do. He would visit Thomas and Luca one final time to say goodbye. Even though they would never remember him, he would never forget them.
And he would always remember their mother too.
* * *
Claudia showered and changed into the silk nightdress and wrap. As the cool softness of the fabric fell against her skin, Claudia wondered who had been so kind yet secretive in gifting them to her. Could it even have been Patrick? She shook the thought from her mind. He couldn’t have known she needed a nightdress and he’d had no time to go shopping as he had been spending all of his spare time with her. Running a soft brush through her hair, she looked in the mirror and thought it was definitely the prettiest nightdress she had ever seen, let alone worn.
And, as soon as she could, she would be contacting the store to find a way to repay them.
Claudia was feeling physically stronger by the day but emotionally drained. Insisting a man like Patrick leave her had been a choice she hoped not to regret but one she had an uneasy feeling that she just might. But she wasn’t prepared to take the risk that she might be hurt again. Not any more.
The man made her feel butterflies in her stomach whenever he was near. Dropping the brush onto the bedside cabinet, she wondered what on earth had come over her. If she didn’t know better, she would think that she had developed a crush on Patrick.
‘Thank goodness, he’s left your life,’ she muttered to herself as she put the brush into her handbag and waited on the bed for her breakfast. She could hear the clanging of the metal plate covers as the trays were being delivered in the adjacent rooms.
‘Here’s yours, sweetie,’ the food service worker said, bringing the tray into her room. He was an older man of African-American heritage, and he’d served her dinner the evening before. He’d been quite chatty then too.
‘Thank you very much.’
‘You’re looking happy this morning. Any reason?’ he asked, a curious smile on his time-weathered but cheerful face. ‘I hope it’s contagious ’cos there’s some biddies on this floor that don’t smile near enough for me. It’s like they drink vinegar not tomato juice!’ His smile wrinkled the skin around his warm brown eyes.
Claudia laughed at his words. ‘I’m just looking forward to seeing my sons in the nursery as soon as I’ve had breakfast. The head nurse insists I eat before I’m allowed to travel downstairs so I’ll eat quickly and get back down there.’
‘They are very lucky little boys to have you as their mother,’ he said before he left the room.
Claudia felt a lump form in her throat. That was exactly what Patrick had said when they’d met in the elevator. He had given her the same compliment and she had spat back at him something acerbic. She couldn’t remember exactly but she knew it had been rude and uncalled for. She felt ashamed. Had she pushed him away unnecessarily? Had she overreacted yet again?
She also felt terribly confused. How could those few words from a friendly old man bring her emotions back to a level of chaos?
What was happening to her? Was Patrick already inside her heart and that was why the words hit home? She took the first bite of her toast and then dropped it on the plate and slumped back in her bed.
* * *
Patrick arrived at the hospital a little after eight. The heaviness in the warm morning air set the tone for the day. He had been gutted by Claudia’s hasty and unexpected dismissal and had no choice but to accept he wouldn’t see her again. But he would see the boys one last time.
The first patient at his private practice was scheduled for nine-thirty so he had plenty of time to visit Thomas and Luca and then head to his surgery near the corner of Rodeo Drive and Santa Monica Boulevard. He had been practicing in the ultra-modern office building for almost seven years and had no need to advertise as the post-operative faces and bodies willing to admit to having been his patients were testament to his skills. As were those people who wanted further freshening up over the years. However, he did set a limit and directed those who he suspected of addiction to cosmetic procedures to a therapist who was better placed to address their issues with body image.
The waiting list for a consultation and surgical procedures was growing but his passion for his work was not. He was dedicated and skilled but not excited. He missed that sense of excitement. The delivery in the elevator had been everything he missed about his former profession...and more.
Patrick strolled into the nursery and spoke with the attending neonatologist about the boys.
‘So Luca has improved? How is the closure of PDA progressing?’
‘It’s looking good.’ The doctor nodded as he continued to read Luca’s notes on the computer screen. ‘I think we’ll be able to cease the medication in a day or so.’
Patrick’s mouth curved to a smile as he looked at the tiny infant, dressed only in a nappy and pale blue booties that had been kindly knitted by the Mercy Hospital
Women’s Auxiliary.
‘And Thomas? Is he still progressing?’
The doctor nodded again. ‘Yes, no major problems with Thomas. There’s a few milestones to reach yet, including weight gain for both of them, before they’ll be discharged but they’re going from strength to strength.’
‘Great to hear.’
‘I’ll leave you to visit with them,’ the doctor said and walked away to attend to another tiny patient.
Patrick stood watching over both boys. It had been three days since their birth. Three days since he had met their wonderful mother. He wondered what their future would hold on the other side of the world and knew if things were different that he would ask if he could visit. Travel over to London and spend some time with them—and with Claudia. But that couldn’t happen. He would never visit that city again.
He stayed longer than he had planned; being with them was a joy to him that was unexpected but welcome. Finally he stroked their tiny foreheads and turned to leave.
‘What are you doing here?’
Patrick’s gaze lifted to see Claudia staring at him. He couldn’t read her expression.
‘I came to say a final goodbye to the boys. You made it clear that you didn’t want to see me again so I thought I’d call in and check up on them for one last time and leave. I didn’t mean to stay as long as I did. I won’t intrude again.’
Claudia looked closely at the man standing next to her sons. He had been watching them the way a father should look at his children. She knew their father would never do that. She had noticed the gentle way Patrick had stroked their little faces. They would never feel that love from the man who had requested she sign a confidentiality form and not mention his involvement.
Claudia wasn’t sure if she was doing the logical thing but it suddenly felt right. At least it felt right for the next few weeks.
‘Please, Patrick, you can sit a while longer if you like.’
Twin Surprise for the Single Doc Page 9
