by Maya Banks
“Tell me what you need, Maren. What do you like? Teach me how to please you.”
“No instructions are necessary,” she said with a smile before offering her mouth for another kiss. “I love this. I love you. Come with me, Steele. I’m so close and it’s so beautiful. Like nothing I’ve ever felt. No frenzied, panting explosive orgasm. Just . . . beautiful. Soul deep. I feel you in every part of me. You’re there.”
“You’re in me too, Maren. You’re the best part of me. You occupy my heart. My soul. My every waking thought and when I go to sleep, you’re there, in my dreams, and when I wake up and see you next to me, I can’t even describe the satisfaction that grips me. It’s like I’ve waited my whole life for you and it feels right to have you right here beside me. In my space. My bed. My life.”
His words washed over her, heightening her desire as a wave of love and emotion consumed her. She wrapped herself around him. Arms, legs, trying to imprint herself into his very soul.
He tightened over her, his face suddenly becoming strained, and his breaths sped up and he pushed deeper.
“Are you ready, Maren? Do I need to slow down so you can catch up? I want you to get there. With me. Always with me.”
She touched his face, gently caressing the lines of his jaw and then feathering over his lips. “I’ll always be with you, Steele. Me and our child. We’re a family now. Your family.”
Emotion rippled over his face and he couldn’t seem to form the words he was trying to say. He looked overcome and so she held him tighter, urging him to his release as hers washed over her like a soothing wave. Beautiful. Poignant. Unlike any orgasm she’d ever experienced.
It rippled through her in waves, intense and pleasurable. And then his movements quickened, almost like he no longer had control over his body and it acted instinctively, driving into her as his muscles coiled and contracted. He filled her with his warmth, the hot jets of his release bathing the inside of her vagina and making his thrusts easier.
She arched into him, wanting all of him, all he had to give. She wanted every inch of him inside her so that she surrounded him and took everything he had to offer.
She kissed him again, easing the lines of tension around his mouth, and then she pressed her forehead to his again just before he collapsed onto her, blanketing her with the heat of his body.
For the longest moment they lay there in silence, each breathing deeply as they recovered from the emotional intensity of the moment. She stroked his back, caressing up and down and over his shoulders, offering him her touch.
He buried his face in her neck and then kissed just below her ear.
“Never been this way with another woman, Maren. Only you. Always you. There’ll never be another.”
She smiled, soaking in the quiet vow.
“It’s a good damn thing,” she said lightly. “I’d hate to have to go kick someone’s ass for encroaching on my territory. I’m tempted to make you wear a sign that says ‘Taken. Hands Off.’”
He chuckled, his chest vibrating against hers. “And I think I’ll get you a shirt that says ‘Don’t mess with a pregnant woman.’”
“Very sound advice.”
He rolled, taking her with him so they remained connected, him still deeply embedded in her.
“I know I should get up and get a towel to clean us up, but I don’t want to move. I like it right here inside you. How ’bout we just change the sheets in the morning and sleep just like this.”
She kissed him, lingering just over his lips. “Works for me.”
CHAPTER 33
STEELE was careful not to wake Maren the next morning when he slipped from the bed. They’d spent the night making slow, leisurely love. They’d made love until they’d both fallen into an exhausted, sated sleep, but even with the few hours of sleep, he felt completely rested. He couldn’t imagine another time when he’d wakened when the world around him felt right.
But it wasn’t, and he couldn’t allow himself to relax his guard even as he reveled in the newness and intensity of their rediscovery of one another. His team would be here soon, and they had a lot to discuss and a lot to do before he felt his home was as safe as he could make it for Maren.
He wasn’t sure how his team would react to being turned over to Donovan, even for a short period of time. It wasn’t a situation he or they had ever faced. It was nothing new for Donovan or even Garrett or Sam to participate in their missions, and there’d been plenty of times when the teams had worked the same mission together, but it had always been clear. Rio led his team. Steele led his. Rio and Steele might take their orders from KGI, but their teams took their orders from Rio and Steele alone.
Hell, he didn’t like giving up his command to another person, even though he had complete confidence in Donovan and knew his team was in good hands. But he and his team were a solid, unbreakable unit that had been greatly tested when the mission had gone horribly wrong for P.J. But they’d come through stronger than ever. They were more than a team. Before Maren, they had been the most important people in his life. Now Maren, and their child, took precedence above all else. Even his team.
They’d understand that. They’d support him absolutely. He knew they had his back no matter what his decisions were. But until he resumed command, it wouldn’t be the same. For any of them. Just as it hadn’t been the same when P.J. had left for a period of time.
They clicked. They worked in perfect accord. They had chemistry that often took years if ever to develop. He couldn’t give that up any more than Maren could give up her career. But they’d both have to make compromises going forward because they had more than themselves to consider.
They had a child. A tiny life dependent on them to love and protect and to place his or her needs above anything else in their lives. He knew with absolute certainty that he and Maren were on the same page when it came to their goals considering their child.
After taking a quick shower, he quietly dressed and glanced over to see Maren still sleeping soundly. She was curled up with her knees pulled toward her belly, and he wondered if it had become a habit during those weeks of uncertainty and fear, an unconscious measure to protect her child even while she slept.
It angered him that she’d lived in fear for so long, never knowing when or if Caldwell would force himself on her or even try to harm her baby. He wanted to kill the bastard for what he’d done. Fuck whatever Hancock was trying to accomplish. Steele wanted Caldwell’s blood.
After gazing at her a moment longer, he reluctantly turned away, checking his watch as he left the bedroom. He shut the door behind him so any noise wouldn’t wake her. She needed the rest and he was going to let her sleep for as long as she could.
After preparing a pot of coffee, he laid out an assortment of tea bags he’d bought for Maren the day before and filled a kettle with water so it would all be ready to go when she woke up. He also took a sleeve of saltine crackers from the box and put it on the bar. She could munch on those while she sipped her tea and if she felt capable of eating anything heavier, he’d cook her breakfast or at least make her some toast.
She’d lost weight since the time they’d spent together in Costa Rica. Even with her belly starting to round ever so slightly, she was thinner. She needed to be better taken care of, and that was precisely what he was going to do for the next five months—and beyond if he had any say in the matter.
By the time he finished his first cup of coffee, his team began arriving. Baker and Renshaw were first, arriving just minutes apart. P.J. and Cole arrived together next, and Dolphin strolled in last.
“How’s Maren doing?” P.J. asked when they’d all taken their seats.
“Still sleeping. I’m letting her rest as long as she’ll sleep,” Steele said.
“I’m going to ask what we’re all wondering, and you can tell me to fuck off if I’m getting too personal,” Dolphin said bluntly.
Steele lifted an eyebrow but regarded his team member in silence, waiting for what he had on his mind.<
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“Is this thing with you and Maren for real?” Dolphin asked.
At Steele’s immediate frown, Dolphin held up his hand.
“Let me rephrase this. Is her baby really yours or did that asshole force himself on her and you’ve stepped in to help her?”
Steele sighed. “Sam had the same question. He and Maren are close. He was worried. And he wanted to know whether to go kick Caldwell’s ass. Yes, the baby is mine. And yes, it’s really none of your damn business, but here’s the deal. For the next while, until the baby is born, I’m out of commission.”
There was a mixture of reactions from surprise to quick frowns.
“What does that mean exactly?” Cole asked in a low voice.
“It means that you’ll be working under Donovan until I’m back in action. For now you’re all taking downtime unless something comes up—and we all know how that goes—but Sam is letting Nathan and Joe’s team loose so they can pick up the slack. Donovan is taking you until I come back. For now my focus has to be on Maren and our child and making damn sure she’s safe. We have a lot to work out, including where we go after the baby is born. Neither of us wants to give up our careers, but as of now, those jobs take a backseat to the child.”
“I get it,” P.J. said. “It won’t be the same not working for you, Steele. I of all people know that most. But I agree, you have to do what you have to do. We’ve worked with Van enough that we’re comfortable with him in the lead. Just don’t get lazy while you’re out of action and expect us to pick up your slack when you come back to work.”
The others laughed at the ribbing P.J. gave him. Steele relaxed. He’d not been looking forward to having to tell his team this. They were a huge part of his life. His everyday existence. He spent more time with them than most married couples spent together.
“The other reason I brought you out here is so you could help me beef up security around here. I want to make sure that if anyone breaches the perimeter I’ll damn well know about it and be prepared.”
The others nodded.
“You’ll call us up if you need us,” P.J. said, not as a question but as a statement of fact. Then her voice lowered. “You fought for me. No way in hell I’m not going to fight for you when you need it. I won’t forget that, Steele. You need us, you say so. Don’t give a damn about downtime. If you have any concerns at all, we’ll be here, even if it’s to take watch shifts.”
Steele stared back at P.J., his chest tightening. “You know I will. There’s no one I trust more to protect my back than my team. There’s no one I trust more with Maren’s safety.”
“Okay, well, we got that all out of the way,” Dolphin said. “Now let’s get to work on making sure no one gets in or out without a huge fucking wake-up call.”
“Now we’re talking,” Renshaw said. “Tell us what you want, boss man, and we’ll make it happen.”
After outlining the things he wanted done, Steele rose and the others followed suit just as Maren walked into the living room, her hair damp from a shower, and she was wearing jeans and a T-shirt but had bare feet. It struck him that she looked utterly at home. In his house, as if it were the most natural thing in the world for her to walk out of his bedroom after taking a shower and dressing.
The sense of rightness hit him hard, and for a long moment all he could do was stare until he realized he was making her uncomfortable with his silent scrutiny.
“Uh, hi, everyone,” she said with a small wave. “I completely forgot you all were coming today. I sorta slept in.”
Everyone greeted her warmly and her awkwardness visibly disappeared. Steele went to her, steering her toward the kitchen.
“I’ll catch up to you guys in a second,” Steele called back. “You can head out to the shed where all the equipment is stored and also unload the stuff you brought with you.”
As the others left, Steele sat Maren down at the bar and then went to the stove to turn on the burner under the kettle of water he’d already prepared.
“I thought you could start with tea and some crackers. If that works for you, I’ll fix you something a little more substantial. I have bagels and cinnamon rolls, or you can have toast. If you think you can stomach eggs, I can scramble some up for you.”
She smiled and propped her elbows up on the bar. “Thanks, Steele, but you don’t have to pamper me, though I won’t lie and say I’m not enjoying it. But you have stuff to do and I don’t want to keep you from it. You go ahead and do your thing with the others so they aren’t kept waiting. I’ll finish up the tea and if I’m hungry after the crackers I’ll figure out something to fix. Want me to make lunch for everyone? How long will this all take?”
“A few hours,” he said. “I hadn’t thought about lunch, and it’s not like we get pizza delivery out here. Or anything else, for that matter.”
“Want me to do burgers or something like that for everyone? It’s the least I can do since you and they are all doing this for me.”
He kissed the top of her head. “Don’t think you have to repay any kind of debt. We look out for each other. I have their backs and they have mine. This is them having our backs. But yeah, burgers sound fine. You sure you can handle the smell of raw hamburger meat? Or for that matter the smell of frying them up? If you want, just make the patties, if you can stomach it, and after we’re done I’ll throw everything on the grill. We’ll have beer and burgers. I guarantee my team isn’t going to turn that down.”
She laughed. “No, I imagine they wouldn’t. That’s a deal. I’ll season the meat and make the patties and stick them in the fridge so they’ll be ready to go when you’re finished. Then I’ll rustle up all the fixings, slice a few tomatoes and onions and wash the lettuce and we’ll be set.”
He rotated her bar stool so she faced him and he pulled her into his chest. “I like you in my kitchen. I like having a perfectly ordinary mundane conversation about who does what for the food preparation. I like having you here. Period. I think you’re domesticating me, Maren.”
She cracked up and rested her forehead against the hollow of his throat so his chin rested atop her head. “Oh, the horror. The world may well be coming to an end. Who would have ever thought the almighty Steele would admit to being domesticated, never mind actually becoming domesticated.”
“How about me admitting, at least in the short time of my newfound domesticity, that I like it?”
“Stop,” she said dramatically. “There’s only so much I can take in one day. That kind of shock can’t be good for the baby.”
He tugged teasingly at her hair and then tilted her head back to kiss her. “I’ll see you in a couple of hours. If you need anything at all, just stick your head out the back door and holler. We won’t be far and one of us will hear you.”
“Okay. Thought I’d wait until after lunch and everyone clears out before I call my parents to arrange their flight out here. Then we can both sit down while I talk to them and hash out the details.”
“Sounds good.”
He kissed her again and then reluctantly pulled himself away from her.
“Try to eat something,” he said as he headed toward the door leading to the back porch. “And just so we’re clear, that was a request. Not a direct order.”
She laughed, her eyes twinkling in merriment. “My, my, looks like you can be trained, Steele.”
He grinned back, enjoying the playful banter that came so easily between them. “For the kind of reward you offer, this old dog can definitely learn a few new tricks.”
CHAPTER 34
MAREN sat in the living room with Steele and the others and nibbled on her burger while the others wolfed theirs down. It tasted wonderful, but she was taking it slow and savoring each bite, hoping her stomach wouldn’t protest and the food would stay down.
She could see just how close Steele and his team were. Sure, she’d seen them plenty of times and could witness the bond they had, but she’d never been around them in a completely relaxed setting where there was no mission i
nvolved and no injuries for her to tend to.
They laughed and joked, the ease with which they communicated showing her more than words how tight-knit they were.
Everyone got a kick out of ribbing Steele over his impending fatherhood, and to Steele’s credit, he took it with good humor. Not once did his characteristic scowl cross his face, and each time there was a mention of his becoming a father, his gaze slid to Maren’s, warmth radiating from his eyes.
He seemed happy and content. More relaxed than she’d ever seen him around others. Even when he and his team had come to her clinic for treatment, he’d been distant and standoffish and spoken in clipped sentences, using only a few words to get his meaning across.
She wondered if his team saw just how different he was. What were they thinking? She knew from what Steele had told her the night before that he was standing down for a while. At least until their baby was born. She had mixed feelings on that. On one hand, she didn’t want to come between him and a job he was obviously passionate about. She never wanted that to be a strain on their relationship or for it to get to a point where he resented her because he was away from what he loved.
But on the other hand, she was deeply relieved that he wouldn’t be going on any missions until after the baby was born. It meant a lot to her that he was placing her and their child above everything else in his life. And if she were honest, it was a huge weight off not having to worry about him leaving at a moment’s notice and her not knowing if he’d make it back.
It was something she’d have to get used to if their relationship worked out long term. There was no way she’d ever ask or expect him to give up his leadership of his team and retire. But at least for now, she’d have him here and safe until after their child was born.
Thinking beyond that was just borrowing trouble. It was best to take it one day at a time and cross the bridge when or if they came to it.
A beep sounded and conversation came to an instant halt. Steele was suddenly alert and wary and his team had also transitioned from joking and talking to utter silence. Tense, poised, ready for action.
