I resisted the urge to throttle her. “You knew I would come for Murdoch.”
“You said as much,” she reminded me. “All I had to do was lie in wait.”
“Until I plucked the threads of your web and drew your eye.”
“Dear, sweet girl.” She dropped the keys into my hand and folded my fingers over them. “If you are to rule with any success, then take my advice. Use all resources available to you. Use all people available to you. Guilt has no place here. Vanity has no place here. Humility, well, much as I hate the taste of humble pie, that one might do you good. I know you think me hard. I am. If I softened, my city would crumble. Our existence depended on my ability to provide for us, and I have no regrets. I did terrible things. Things that turn my stomach to think of them. So my advice to you is be strong, be mercenary. Never fear another’s hatred or their envy. Oh. One more thing. It’s simple enough.” She tapped my shoulder and lowered her voice. “Always watch your back.”
The keys in my palm felt heavier somehow. “I will keep your advice in mind.”
“See that you do.” Looking very pleased with herself, she walked past me.
“There is one more thing.”
“Well?” Her steps slowed. “What is it?”
“I noticed a few items of interest in your room,” I ventured, “besides the wing.”
Her shoulders stiffened. “Figured I’d hear about that sooner or later.”
I braced myself for her anger. “Then I’m sorry to be so predictable.”
“Enough suspense.” She turned. “What do you want from me?”
“Nothing,” I answered truthfully.
“No one wants nothing for keeping a secret. What’re you after? You want out of our deal?”
“It’s more that I want you to do something. As Mana’s advisor, perhaps you could advise a little more and manipulate a little less? I understand her inexperience filling your former role is a temptation for you to step into her position and perform her duties rather than teaching her to fulfill her obligations, but the fact remains she is maven. More than that, she’s my friend. I want what’s best for her. If that means suggesting to your son perhaps he ought to inspect your rooms, I will.”
“You don’t know what you’ve stumbled across, girl. Or what the knowledge would do to my son.” She heaved a sigh. “You made your point. I’ve neglected Mana. I owe her better than that.”
“I regret broaching the topic this way.” If she would listen to reason, we might have talked.
“After the time I’ve given you?” She whirled from me. “I somehow doubt that.”
I let her take two steps before blurting, “May I ask something?”
“Why not?” She flicked her wrist. “You’ve got me by the short and curlies. Ask away.”
Despite her peevishness, I ventured, “Do you really miss being a maven so much?”
Her soft laughter reached my ears. “Who said I ever stopped?” As if sensing my confusion, she glanced back at me. “You don’t listen well, do you? Being a maven means you put clan first. Always. I do that every day, and I need no title to be what I am.”
“Thank you.” At her smirk, I said, “No. I mean it. Thank you. For sending Bram, the pack, for everything.”
A flush spread across her wrinkled cheeks. “You’re welcome.” Pulling herself up taller, she turned and resumed her walk. “Now. If you don’t mind, sweet wine is flowing and I’ve a mighty thirst. I hope your headache eases. I’m sure a few hours lying abed ought to cure what ails you.”
My mouth fell open, but spluttering was the best I managed. Put well in my place, I stared at the key in my hand and debated the wiseness of my actions. Quick as my fingers closed, I turned the knob and descended the stairs into the grotto. Mold perfumed the air. My guide was one lone torch flickering before a cell where Murdoch must be listening to sounds of merriment overhead.
“Kaidi.” There was no question in the way he said my name.
“I’m here.”
Footsteps scuffled. Hands closed around the bars. “I thought you had decided to stay away.”
My chest tightened at the sight of him. “I can leave if you prefer.”
“You should.” Torchlight illuminated his face. “Staying here with me is madness.”
“Madness would be leaving you down here alone in the cold when you might have warmth and company.”
“Cold or not, you’re maven now.” His knuckles whitened. “You shouldn’t be here.”
Pride stinging at his rebuke, I stood before him, forced him to look at me. “Tell me to go.”
His eyes were as black, cold and hard as Vaughn’s ever had been. “I just did.”
“You said I should, not that you wished me to.”
“I want you to leave. Now. Before you’re seen. There.” He retreated into his cell. “I said it.”
“More’s the pity.” I grasped the bars. “I don’t believe you.”
He lifted his head. “Must you make everything difficult?”
“I was just wondering the same thing about you.” His defeated posture dampened my palms. “I told you I would come for you. Here I am. You must have known I would not leave you here.”
“You are maven now.” His voice was a whisper. “You must think of your reputation.”
“We have known for some days I would become maven. That did not prevent me from being allowed to share your company on the way to Cathis.” To my regret, “Nothing happened that we could not be seen doing, but that doesn’t change the fact we slept side by side as Hishima’s body cooled in the cavern below us. If my title didn’t bother you then, why should it bother you now?”
“The thing about caverns, grottos, is how well sound carries.” He gestured. “I heard Isolde.”
Thinking on our conversation, there was nothing I would begrudge him hearing. “And?”
“It’s a simple thing to forgive what happens after the heat of battle, when shock is fresh and judgment is clouded. Your clan will view your actions as those of a bereaved female who sought protection, who feared for her life and for theirs, who clung to their guardian. That is forgivable.”
His words stirred my ire. “You would prefer my clan believe I am a coward?”
His growl of frustration mirrored the one rising in my chest. For a time, we snarled as beasts at each other. “You are more stubborn than any sensible female ought to be. Braver than is wise. You’re no coward. Only a fool would dare call you one. What does it matter what they believe?”
“Exactly.” I slapped the bars with my palms. “What does it matter if they see us together?”
He ran a hand through his hair. “Your reputation—”
“If Hishima had died naturally, if I had a home for you to wreck, that would be one thing.” I gripped the bars and rattled his cage. “He didn’t, and I don’t. I have a heap of ash and stone, and so few clansmen to my name claiming a title seems ridiculous.” Absolute clarity struck me, and I had to wonder if this wasn’t yet another of Isolde’s schemes come to fruition. “No one who looks upon my city, upon me, could begrudge me a helpmate who could protect me and mine while we restore what was lost. Rawer wounds have been sliced open than ours. I will not skulk about with you in the dark. I am done with secrets and lies. If you do not want me, well, that I will respect.”
“Would you?” His laughter was exhausted, frustrated and warmed me to my bones.
“Respect your decision, yes. Abide by it, no.” I slid my hand through the bars and waited for him to come to me. “I have tasted your lips, mapped your skin, and I know only hunger for you.”
At last, he strode forth and laced our fingers. “It is cruel to say such things to a caged male.”
“Did you not hear?” I teased him, reaching into a pocket. “I have a key.”
His gaze latched on to it. “I heard you bargain for it, but not the outcome.”
“This…” I dangled it from my finger, “…cost me seven crystal earrings.”
The desir
e in his eyes cooled. “That is far too much.”
I tightened my fingers so he could not release my hand. “I have bought you a year to decide your fate. There is no price too high to place on a person’s freedom. I am not Brynmor. This is a gift. This is not a thing I do with any expectation of being paid back. It is not a debt you owe me. It is a chance for you to see what your life might have been had you not been forced into the role you play now. I do not need a provider. I do not need you to sacrifice for me. If you want to do a thing for me, accept my offer without condition. Do this for yourself. If you pine for Cathis, then at the year’s end, I will return you.” Though the prospect made me despair. “I promise you that.”
He seemed at a loss. “I could never repay you.”
I tugged at our joined hands. “A gift requires no compensation.”
“Compensation implies repayment of the original sum, which I could never do.”
“I see you fail to grasp the definition of the word gift.” I managed to move him a step closer.
“Those earrings almost bought you an army.”
“Ah, but they didn’t, did they?” I brought him two steps nearer. “If you prefer, think of them as compensation for the pain I inflicted upon you, or for pants ruined in my first escape attempt.”
He scoffed. “My pants were hardly worth…”
Near as he stood, I could reach through the bars and finger the closure of said pants, so I did. His breath whistled through his teeth, his fingers digging into mine as I coaxed him in easy reach of my greedy hand. “Let me do this thing for you. Think not of the cost. I see it as an investment of hours, my time to spend how I choose. It’s not as if I would have to purchase crystals for what I require. I have several in my family’s cache in the cavern that would do. I know our worlds are far apart, that our lives and families are quite different, but perhaps a difference is needed. These are strange and troubling times for us all, and a wise maven once told me to use any advantage.”
He caught my wrist before I cupped the hard bulge rising to meet my hand.
“Keep using that advantage,” he groaned, “and I’ll lose what shred of self-control I possess.”
I laughed at his seriousness. “You are the embodiment of the self-controlled male.”
“Not around you.” He lifted my hand to his mouth. “Never around you.”
“Shall I come in? Or had you rather I let you out?” Either way, I wanted no bars between us.
“I won’t take you here, like this.” His sigh masked a borderline growl. “We should wait.”
“I’m not a fan of waiting.”
Taking the matter into my own hands, I disentangled from him and put the key I had won to good use. I unlocked his cell and stepped inside. I expected slimy floors and moldy bedding. His cell had neither. The small room was dry. Though a day old, the scent of freshly laundered sheets made a dent in the musty odor filling the grotto. In the corner, on the edge of the mattress, one of his books sat. He would worry the dampness might work into its pages, so that led me to believe Isolde had left it for him. Mana, with her collection of herbology texts, would have known better.
I perched on the bed and lifted the book. “A History of Cathis. How did this get down here?”
Murdoch peered through the door toward the empty staircase. “Vaughn was here earlier.”
“Why?” Come to assuage his guilt or perhaps to feed his pride?
“He wanted to speak with me in depth about what I saw and heard, about my thoughts on the Necrita and the danger facing our clan, and yours. He asked how the others had died. I told him it was only by their sacrifice that I stood before him. I told him, too, how Hishima died, and what it meant for the rest of us. If a mother will kill her son without hesitation, what else might she do?”
I flipped open the cover and found a sheaf of paper with a message penned in a precise hand. At the end of the letter, a fierce canis head seal was stamped beneath Vaughn and Mana’s signatures.
The paper trembled in my hand. “Did you happen to open the book?”
“No.” He noted my excitement. “I wasn’t of a mind to read.”
“Here.” I thrust the paper at him. “This might change your tune.”
“These are commission papers.” His brow creased. “I’m relieved of my duties in Cathis and given command over the regiment in place on Titania’s border.” As he worried the paper’s edge between his fingers, dried ink crackled, and a second page drifted free of the first. “What’s that?”
I caught the letter before it brushed the floor. “I don’t know.”
He pinched the top between his fingers. “Let me see, and I can tell you.”
“No, wait.” I skimmed the first line and spotted my name. “This one is addressed to me.”
Murdoch waited as I read before clearing his throat. “Well? What does it say?”
“If you’re reading this, Kaidi girl,” I began, “then my son saw reason for once and did as his mother told him. Stubborn boy never listens. I’m as shocked as you must be, let me tell you. Or I will be once I realize he did as he should, which is to say he spoke with Murdoch. It’s as close to an apology as my boy ever gives. It’s not an admission of his wrongdoing, but more a concession that some decisions must be made in the field, and that if his orders are broken, there better damn well be a good reason. Lucky for you, Murdoch has one. He won’t be punished further. Cramped in a cell overnight as he was, cold and bored, with only the sound of water dripping for company, is punishment enough. Gods that noise drives me batty. Plink. Plink. Plink.” Bemused, I glanced up in time to catch the tic working beneath Murdoch’s eye. With a smile, I read to the end. “You should have gotten a key off me earlier. Use it. You have a room. Put it to use too. Best, Isolde.”
While Murdoch scrubbed his eyes, I flipped her letter from front to back. “How…?”
“Schemes within schemes,” he said though his fingers.
“Clever.” By sending her son to speak with Murdoch, she ensured that if Vaughn did arrive, so would the book and her letter. Knowing I would wish to see Murdoch, she pilfered keys from the guard on watch, which happened to be Lleu. From that point, we were victims of her whims.
“I’m almost afraid to leave.” He leaned against the wall as if contemplating our next move.
Watching him rub his mouth made mine tingle for his kiss. “Then let’s stay here.”
Careful to put the book in a safe spot, I rose and edged past Murdoch. With a clang, I locked us in his cell. The key I waved under his nose a second before dropping it between my breasts. It lodged in a frigid lump that brushed my navel and quickly warmed to match my temperature.
“I won’t take you here,” he told my breasts, for his eyes had not lifted from their vicinity.
I strode to him, pinned his shoulders to the bars. “Then you will be taken.”
“A female in your position…” His voice strangled in his throat when I went to my knees.
“You were saying?” I grasped his pants and worked the laces.
He slid hands under my arms and lifted me from the ground. “No.”
Heat scalding my cheeks, I stepped from his grasp. “Perhaps you are right.” I opened his cell door and reached the first step before Murdoch’s arms enfolded me. “Will you join me upstairs?”
“I have a better idea.” He pressed a kiss to my pulse. “I have somewhere else in mind.”
“Oh?” He must have heard the hesitation in my voice, because he bit me then. Hard.
“Hurry.” He kept an arm around me and led me past his cell. “Before we are caught.”
His was one of several cramped together in a row. At either end, tunnels forked, leading out of the grotto. Those were the ones we could see. I knew from our escape there must be more they kept hidden behind false walls and hatches. Curiosity overwhelmed me. “Where are we going?”
“A place few in Cathis ever go.” He quickened his step. “No one will look for us there.”
Around
the bend and up a short flight of stairs, the grotto transitioned into the more familiar patterns of the Tower Square. Here all the doors looked the same, perhaps in an attempt to blend one into another so that any who wandered would become lost if they were not meant to be here.
Murdoch’s gait left me out of breath. His palm slapped against a heavy oak door that swung open on a huff of air smelling of ink and old papers. I sneezed while he called, “Anyone about?” He didn’t wait for an answer. Good thing there was none. While I turned a slow circle, he shifted his attention to a heavy bar meant to lock the door. Grunting, he hefted it into place. “That’ll do.”
Though the room was cramped, smaller than Murdoch’s room I’d wager, it overflowed with bookcases stuffed with hefty tomes. His proprietary manner had made me believe the books kept in his room belonged to him. I realized he had borrowed them from this most unexpected library.
While he cleared a desk with great care, I spotted a ledger on a podium, an accounting of all books loaned by their title and by borrower. My eyes widened at the multitude of titles verses the singularity of the borrowers. Murdoch’s name was scrawled neatly onto every line on the page.
I traced his name with my finger. “Do you come here often?”
“I see my secret has been revealed.” He glanced up from his sorting. “Are you surprised?”
“No.” Now that I knew what to look for, his touches were evident in the careful assignments of books to their shelves. All were arranged by theme or by author, done by a hand that knew the contents of each well enough to transform a modest closet of treasures into a cohesive collection.
I melted when his arms wrapped around me, drawing me close, burying his face at my neck.
“Why do you love books so much?” His addiction seemed so at odds for a guardsman.
“When I was young and trapped in a role, in a place I desperately wanted to leave, they were my escape.” His hot lips pressed against my pulse. A sharp nibble broke skin. “The habit stuck.”
Pleasant heat spread down my throat, warming my chest, quickening my heart as his venom set to work on me. The more potent the venom, the more calculated the dosage, the more aroused its recipient became, assuming the biter knew what they were doing. Murdoch left no doubt on that score. I shivered as fire raced through my veins. He held me, tugged the laces on my bodice.
Araneae Nation: The Complete Collection Page 82
